But I have a friend who is like a 38 year old actuary and his girlfriend of 3 years is crying because he "doesn't know" if he wants kids. What the fuck is wrong with our society today that people like this our content to live in a world so devoid of family connection?

Odds are in 10 years his parents will be dead, his gf will have broken up with him, and he'll live 4,000 miles from his siblings. Why do so many people now think this is a better result than changing diapers for a couple of years and missing brunch?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37251900)

so does clooney

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37256728)

Part of that is birth control but there has to be more to it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37251953)

i dont fucking want kids and no one's going to make me.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252071)

I called him aspie because he lacks the empathy necessary to understand why someone wouldn't have kids - a major life decision. That's one of the major signs of aspergers.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37255809)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37255811)

What did you get on the lsat?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37255812)

There are many more people that would like to have kids but don't have the jobs to afford them and then there is another part of the population that can't find a suitable partner or have been judged to not be suitable (incels)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252056)

But once I had my own it instantly became the best thing I had ever done and I couldn't imagine my life without them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252117)

I say this as a kid haver

modern parenting is lonely and vastly unsupported - we used to raise kids in a tighter system with many hands, live in communities that made many of our decisions for us (you will always live here, you do what your dad did, etc etc), and the minimum requirements of good parenting were slim

now it’s parents do it all alone (and apart from fam) and typically under career stress, romantic degradation and social disconnection

I really like it here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252160)

I can only imagine how disheartening it would be to spend decades raising a kid who later turns against you because you are too “backwards and racist.” I suspect this will happen to at least some XO poasters.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252179)

When GC starts to feel pressure from low replacement rates then you’ll start to see this kind of shift.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252194)

Dynamic btwn men and women, individuals and communities, etc. and in the conext of kid having these changes are generally quite bad overall.

60 years ago you could go to work for reasomable hours, back to your sahw who watched kid all day, eat a home cooked meal in the large yard of your huge fully paid off house within walking distance of good friends and family.

Compare to today where you and your wife work greuling hours to afford apartment 17-G in a dirty city and your kid is being raised by a jamaican nanny and he cant play outside bc its too busy or dangerous. You dont know any of your neighbors names.

What society thinks is optimal/favorable is strangely trending toward the latter, mostly due to GC overlords

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252205)

Protip: 60 years ago plenty of people worked long hours, traveling a ton and came home to a horrible, bitchy cunt wife that didn't respect them at all and children that didn't care about them at all.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37254953)

OWAS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37255837)

The vast majority of work is fucking hell.

Having kids means a lot more hell.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252316)

Not just in terms of professional work, but in sheer reduction of free time as well.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37254962)

38 year old manchild in the OP needs to grow up and figure out what he wants do with his life and stop leaving his GF hanging.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37252558)

Plus, we live in a time where there aren't a ton of benefits to kids. No, your kids aren't going to be super grateful you had them. No, that gf wouldn't be super grateful to the guy if he had kids with her. In fact, nothing stops her from running off and fucking some guy and then he ends up in a custody battle. Nothing stops her from becoming that one poster's wife that decided she has no interest in ever working again and openly treats him like shit to the point of laughing at his pain in front of his own children.

Back in the day, people were more bored, there was less opportunity to avoid kids, kids were cheaper or even an economic positive. None of that is true anymore.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37254933)

College is expensive as shit and obviously doubles for 2 kids.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37258070)

Now that the gov takes care of the olds there is less incentive to have kids because everyone thinks that social security/pension will be there.

Jokes on them. The next generation will see that it's better to rely on your own children than the gov.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37255913)

Except that in wealthy societies reproduction isn't even at replacement levels. A bunch of people go for 0 kids and many more just have 1. 3 kids is considered strange.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#37258094)

1. They are expensive.

2. They require a lot of attention/nurturing.

3. They drastically limit your freedom.

4. Often, they don't add any real ROI until decades later (if at all).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4135583&forum_id=2#39738661)