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PROTIP: use "Websters dictionary defines..." to start ur closing

It has a reputation now as this hackneyed expression, which ...
salmon geriatric theatre
  04/24/15
...
thriller abusive indian lodge mood
  04/24/15
...
Electric mauve dopamine associate
  04/24/15
...
Marvelous maroon cuckold
  04/24/15
did this today
Glassy tanning salon incel
  10/22/15
"A lot changed on 9/11..."
maize background story
  10/22/15
(guy who wrote a great college essay)
Ruby sadistic bawdyhouse police squad
  10/22/15
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury..." *briefcase f...
Brass puppy sanctuary
  10/22/15
...
Wild school fanboi
  10/22/15
...
Word combinations
  10/08/25
(high school debate semifinalist)
Racy Crusty Immigrant
  10/22/15
...
salmon geriatric theatre
  05/16/16
who the fuck was webster
Laughsome nursing home clown
  05/16/16
Noah Webster. Just some autistic bro who really liked words
salmon geriatric theatre
  05/16/16
whats his moniker
Laughsome nursing home clown
  05/16/16
CharlesXII
salmon geriatric theatre
  05/16/16
...
Citrine stirring resort circlehead
  12/28/16
180 advice it will hit the jury like some sort of heavy book...
ivory abode
  12/28/16
"Urban dictionary defines 'STAY WOKE' as . . . "
Indigo skinny woman
  12/28/16
...
Citrine stirring resort circlehead
  11/11/20
...
Sexy Thirsty Macaca Step-uncle's House
  07/26/24
...
Paralegal Adolf Hitler
  10/08/25


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Date: April 24th, 2015 2:57 PM
Author: salmon geriatric theatre

It has a reputation now as this hackneyed expression, which is why it WORKS. The jury always perks up because it's so unexpected. Also it frames the issue very clearly: this is the plain definition, here are the facts, the facts don't match the accusation, acquittal. I literally bring a well-worn old dictionary and thump it onto the jury railing.

Prosecutors get flustered as FUCK and end up reacting to me rather than making their own case, and it makes them look gay as hell. They smirk or scoff, which makes them look like douches. They usually take time in their own closings to say something about "the defense counsel's old tricks and theatrics" but that just reminds the jury even more.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#27751704)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 3:13 PM
Author: thriller abusive indian lodge mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#27751815)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 3:17 PM
Author: Electric mauve dopamine associate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#27751846)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 24th, 2015 3:26 PM
Author: Marvelous maroon cuckold



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#27751921)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 1:59 PM
Author: Glassy tanning salon incel

did this today

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022119)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:23 PM
Author: maize background story

"A lot changed on 9/11..."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022597)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:24 PM
Author: Ruby sadistic bawdyhouse police squad

(guy who wrote a great college essay)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022604)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:25 PM
Author: Brass puppy sanctuary

"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury..." *briefcase full of dictionaries falls open*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022609)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:31 PM
Author: Wild school fanboi



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022646)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2025 8:52 PM
Author: Word combinations (2 make yer heart skip)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#49335488)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 22nd, 2015 3:33 PM
Author: Racy Crusty Immigrant

(high school debate semifinalist)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#29022657)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:19 PM
Author: salmon geriatric theatre



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#30492581)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:20 PM
Author: Laughsome nursing home clown

who the fuck was webster

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#30492585)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:25 PM
Author: salmon geriatric theatre

Noah Webster. Just some autistic bro who really liked words

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#30492630)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:27 PM
Author: Laughsome nursing home clown

whats his moniker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#30492644)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 16th, 2016 7:37 PM
Author: salmon geriatric theatre

CharlesXII

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#30492706)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:17 PM
Author: Citrine stirring resort circlehead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#32250208)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:18 PM
Author: ivory abode

180 advice it will hit the jury like some sort of heavy book!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#32250216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2016 5:20 PM
Author: Indigo skinny woman

"Urban dictionary defines 'STAY WOKE' as . . . "

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#32250229)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 11th, 2020 11:38 PM
Author: Citrine stirring resort circlehead



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#41347456)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 26th, 2024 1:08 PM
Author: Sexy Thirsty Macaca Step-uncle's House



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#47895234)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 8th, 2025 8:51 PM
Author: Paralegal Adolf Hitler (✅🍑)



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2862749&forum_id=2)#49335487)