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Twas the Night Before Christmas (Peterman version)

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J ...
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
  12/03/18
...
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
  12/03/18
TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy ...
Gaped really tough guy ceo
  12/03/18
ty!
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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jfc, this was 180. This is why I continue to visit this d...
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To be fair, What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vu...
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120
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thriller duck-like haunted graveyard old irish cottage
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Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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Odious tan weed whacker
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Adventurous azure library
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this was pretty good, nice work
Rambunctious dark patrolman hospital
  12/24/18
~*Christmas in July bump*~
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
  07/01/19
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Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone
  07/01/19
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Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone
  07/01/19
Early December Bump
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
  12/10/19
getting close...
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
  12/20/19
ding ding ding
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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Exciting Fear-inspiring Therapy
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Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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thirsty house-broken goal in life
  12/24/19
This deserves more bumps.
medicated coldplay fan
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emerald idiot abode
  12/24/19
lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180
Milky Incel
  12/24/19
lol
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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This
Honey-headed tripping water buffalo boltzmann
  12/24/21
Missed this the first time. Great work dude. 180
impertinent state boiling water
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ty, labor of love
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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costumed doctorate
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Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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lube up your chimneys!
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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pure gold 180
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Grizzly new version half-breed
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Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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Swashbuckling Mahogany International Law Enforcement Agency Lay
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Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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Mint multi-colored hall
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Grizzly new version half-breed
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Chri$tmas $pirit
Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor
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Lmao
green irradiated rigpig affirmative action
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Trip Feces
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grown men with poopy butt cracks
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constantscreen the great
  12/25/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 12:45 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the J

Lots of truckers were hungry, much like any old day;

The rig pigs were hung, taking dick pics with care,

In hopes that St. Peterman soon would be there;

The truckers were horny, dicks throbbing and red ,

While visions of Peter’s plums danced in their heads;

And Earl in his 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down longing for Peterman’s gap,

When out on the lot there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the truck to see what was the matter.

Away to the lot I flew like a flash,

Tore open my zipper in hope of fresh gash.

The moon on the breast of the softly lit J

Made the lot lizards glow, all looking to play,

When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,

But a beady-eyed Peterman, and eight tiny trans-queers,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment this night would be sick.

More rapid than eagles out their trousers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, FLASHER! now, DANCER! now, PRANCER and VIXEN!

On, ROCKET ! on CUPID! on, BONER and SHITZEN!

To the back of the truck! to the top of the wall!

Now suck away! suck away! fuck away all!"

As lubed holes that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with a cock, were mounted to the sky,

So up to the truck-stops the trans-queers they flew,

With the sleigh full of boys, and St. Peterman too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little poof.

As he jerked with his hand, and was turning around,

“Stuff my chimney!” said St. Peterman on the ground.

He was dressed all in latex, from his head to his foot,

His knees were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of dildos he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just lifting his sac.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his boihole like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin had cum white as snow;

The stump of my pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And his lips did encircle its head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

His broad backside shook like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

We filled all their “stockings” and had circle jerks,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

A huge snort of cocaine billowed up and rose;

Then he sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all pranced like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight,

"HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, CASH AND CHECKS ARE ALL-RIGHT!"

Happy December, Merry Christmas & Happy New Year.

Upset Jew, 12-03-2018



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37342568)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:00 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343357)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:04 PM
Author: Gaped really tough guy ceo

TLDR but clearly you spent a lot of time on this, plz enjoy this pity bump as my Chanukah present to you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343380)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:10 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

ty!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343413)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:16 PM
Author: Glittery athletic conference chad

jfc, this was 180.

This is why I continue to visit this demented chatbort.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343471)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:53 PM
Author: Honey-headed tripping water buffalo boltzmann



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43670143)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:17 PM
Author: Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343477)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:18 PM
Author: Aromatic pisswyrm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343484)



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Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: internet-worthy sneaky criminal nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343509)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:22 PM
Author: Laughsome Zombie-like Gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343515)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2018 3:26 PM
Author: Glittery athletic conference chad



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37343539)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:35 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37367063)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:39 AM
Author: awkward excitant orchestra pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37367091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:50 AM
Author: Swashbuckling Mahogany International Law Enforcement Agency Lay



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37367151)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:52 AM
Author: Bull Headed Talking Cuckold



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37367159)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 7th, 2018 11:55 AM
Author: Cerebral fighting mother lodge



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37367178)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 14th, 2018 12:12 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37407273)



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Date: December 14th, 2018 12:15 PM
Author: ivory appetizing karate bawdyhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37407292)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:40 AM
Author: Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462612)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:41 AM
Author: Mildly Autistic Carnelian Public Bath Dog Poop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462615)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:44 AM
Author: ebony stage dopamine

To be fair,

What—a Jew lampooning Christmas in a vulgar and sexually explicit manner for “laughs”? Why I’ve never

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462619)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:52 AM
Author: thriller duck-like haunted graveyard old irish cottage

120

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462646)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 7:44 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37465688)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:47 AM
Author: thriller duck-like haunted graveyard old irish cottage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462629)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:54 AM
Author: Mint multi-colored hall



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462649)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:46 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37462815)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 8:02 PM
Author: Soul-stirring lemon brethren turdskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37465757)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:27 PM
Author: Milky Incel

Artistic gold tyvmft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37466002)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 12:45 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43619656)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:30 PM
Author: Odious tan weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37466012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:35 PM
Author: Adventurous azure library



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37466032)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2018 9:38 PM
Author: Rambunctious dark patrolman hospital

this was pretty good, nice work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#37466049)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

~*Christmas in July bump*~

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#38469719)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#38469721)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 1st, 2019 5:53 PM
Author: Racy Queen Of The Night Telephone



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#38469720)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 10th, 2019 9:37 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

Early December Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39241607)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2019 12:21 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

getting close...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39297740)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:18 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

ding ding ding

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39316620)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 12:38 AM
Author: Exciting Fear-inspiring Therapy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39316668)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:42 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317383)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:49 AM
Author: thirsty house-broken goal in life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 8:52 AM
Author: medicated coldplay fan

This deserves more bumps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317415)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:07 AM
Author: emerald idiot abode



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317493)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:14 AM
Author: Milky Incel

lost it at 8 tiny trans queers. still unmitigated 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317523)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:57 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39318060)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2021 4:54 PM
Author: Honey-headed tripping water buffalo boltzmann

This

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43670148)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 9:30 AM
Author: impertinent state boiling water

Missed this the first time. Great work dude.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39317610)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 10:58 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

ty, labor of love

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39318062)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:02 AM
Author: costumed doctorate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39318085)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 11:51 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39318318)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 1:48 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

lube up your chimneys!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39318901)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:19 PM
Author: Honey-headed tripping water buffalo boltzmann

pure gold 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39319682)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 5:57 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39320155)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2019 4:29 PM
Author: marvelous magenta mood



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#39319749)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2020 2:54 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#41553760)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 23rd, 2020 1:37 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#41603653)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 8:07 AM
Author: Grizzly new version half-breed



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#41608882)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:14 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

It's time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#41610330)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 24th, 2020 1:19 PM
Author: Swashbuckling Mahogany International Law Enforcement Agency Lay



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#41610375)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43618689)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:32 AM
Author: Mint multi-colored hall



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43619119)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 16th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: Grizzly new version half-breed



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43619130)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:21 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor

Chri$tmas $pirit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43643241)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2021 12:27 PM
Author: green irradiated rigpig affirmative action

Lmao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43643299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 5:59 PM
Author: Bespoke razzmatazz casino private investor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#43658914)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 22nd, 2021 6:53 PM
Author: green irradiated rigpig affirmative action



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Date: December 24th, 2021 4:49 PM
Author: Trip Feces



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Date: December 25th, 2023 11:04 AM
Author: Honey-headed tripping water buffalo boltzmann



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Date: December 25th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: grown men with poopy butt cracks



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Date: December 25th, 2025 8:10 AM
Author: nude butt cheeks (✅🍑)



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Reply Favorite

Date: December 25th, 2025 8:14 AM
Author: constantscreen the great



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4147937&forum_id=2)#49538935)