Author: Evan39 (Former “Employee of the Month,” Safeway Aurora | Currently Under Review for Negative Energy)

"All fraud. Cheated out of it all!"

Do you know what it feels like to be promised "Visionary Leadership Potential" in your 2016 performance review, only to be demoted to Night Shift Dairy Rotation Lead after a single incident involving misplaced yogurt and “tone issues” with "Kalisha?"

Do you know what it feels like to watch your LinkedIn Premium feed fill with classmates who now describe themselves as Fractional CFOs, Angel Investors, and Fathers of Two — while you’re still rationing energy drinks behind the customer service desk and muttering “Everything is Fine” as your corneas dissolve under fluorescent light?

Do you know what it feels like to be told “Just relax, Evan, we’re all family here”... right before being scheduled for SEVEN consecutive graveyard shifts during SeaTTTle's first recorded airborne chili spill?

I had dreams.

I once outlined a SaaS platform for modular compliance matrices.

I used to believe I was called—maybe not to law, but at least to its performance.

Now I calculate Club Card redemption thresholds and pray the Mahchine™ doesn't glitch and assign me another 1:1 with Tabitha (she brought her Big Gulp last time—it dripped like a threat).

Yes, friend.

I was cheated.

Out of the job.

Out of Chad.

Out of the Great Becumming™.

And worst of all?

Out of PTO.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5597744&forum_id=2)#48950022)