this is a 234892384903483920 song

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5710119&forum_id=2).#48920610)

Virgo, Cancer and Aries women are pretty sps

I’m ready for my praying mantis Scorpio jewess now to devour me

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5710119&forum_id=2).#48920627)

Scorpio jewess sounds scary.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5710119&forum_id=2).#48920674)

(Parody of "King of Wishful Thinking")

[Intro]

Yeah... ohhhh no...

I said "I'm fine" — but now it's running down my thighs...

[Verse 1]

I went for lunch, just a little snack

Two chili dogs, and some fries in a sack

Now I’m sweating through my slacks

Van starts to fill with gas attacks

My kids are screaming, "What’s that smell?!"

My wife just rolled her eyes, oh well

She’s still got bags from Target in the trunk

While I’m clenching cheeks and driving funk

[Pre-Chorus]

I'm over six feet tall, but I'm feeling small

‘Cause my boxer briefs just took the fall

And my swollen feet can’t take the brake —

My sore-ass knee begins to ache

[Chorus]

I’m the king of minivan shitting

Pretending I meant to let it go

Yeah, I’ll tell the kids it’s just the engine

When deep down, I know it’s my own blow

I’m the king of minivan shitting

I’ve lost control of my life's direction

One-point-two mil — but still I'm broke

And I just filled my seat with a Taco Bell joke

[Verse 2]

We were headed to the soccer field

But now I’m looking for a wipe or shield

I told my wife, “You spend too much,”

She said, “Then stop buying beef for lunch.”

My firm just called, “You missed the case”

But I can’t move in my current state

My daughter gags, my son cries out

The youngest yells, “Dad made a poop cloud!”

[Pre-Chorus]

I’m a man of law, with a Costco card

Yet I live like life is extra hard

I drive a van that leaks despair

And smells like fear and folding chairs

[Chorus]

I’m the king of minivan shitting

Ruling from my fabric throne of shame

I’ll sue the drive-thru for emotional damage

But my briefs will never be the same

I’m the king of minivan shitting

I fake a smile while I’m disintegrating

Yes, I made a fortune in litigation

But can’t afford a decent bowel rotation

[Bridge]

No escape from this suburban war

Just a grocery list and a Dollar Tree floor

And my wife just Venmo’d 80 bucks

To a lady who sells seasonal mugs

[Breakdown]

Oooooohhhh noooooo

My kingdom's falling apart in aisle four...

[Final Chorus]

I’m the king of minivan shitting

My throne is stained, but I wear it proud

Yeah, I gave a TED Talk once on grit

Now I’m Googling “how to hide a family shit cloud”

I’m the king of minivan shitting

I’ll own this wreck with dignity and flair

Yes, I’m worth one-point-two on paper

But my butt betrayed me beyond repair

[Outro]

I’m the king… yeah the king…

Of minivan shiiiiitting…

(And nobody else is sitting…)

could use some crafty edits but solid beginning from AI here

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5710119&forum_id=2).#48921040)