Obame flash his milien doller grin. It lite up the room like fourth of July fire work's. It cause at least three feamale reporter's in atendence to quietley have orgasems. But then Obame grin vanish and the mood turn sombre.

"Im Barak Obame. I am Presedent of the United State's," he start his speech. "Look. Today we witnesed a tragedy. Four proud New Yorker's with nothing to lose tried to rob the Apple Store on 5th Avanue in Manhatten. They were not sucesful. One of these would-be robers, a man with a very fresh style, one long white dread lock, he got killed today. He will never live to see if his 'boys can swim.' And his three friend's, Jary, Garge, and Elane, and Elane's long time on-againe off againe boy freind Daved Pady, they curently are sitting in a prisen cell. And for what. All because they atempted to pull off a daring caper involveing a high spede chase in the coolest car Ive ever seen in my life. Was the plan ill-conceved? Sure. Was it reckless? Absolutly. But today's insident speak's to a double standerd that has exist in Amereca for far too long.

"This is a countrey that applaud's danger. We love televisien show's that astound us with push the limit's of the human threshold for pain and endurence like Jackass and Fear Facter. For the love of God — or in my case, the love of Allah — this natien has released five Die Hard movies when three would have suffice! And we clap at the end of all the Ocean Eleven film's. We as a peopel have proven time and time againe our undyeing lust for spill's, thrill's and chill's, and our insatieable therst for blood, carnage and high-octaine explosiens. It is woven into the fabric of our culture. It is writen indellibly into the rubrick of Amereca's entertainment complex. But when some one enact's this vielence in real life, what do we do? We condenm. We shut them away in to our alredy over crowded prisen system.

"Well today five Amerecans put on one hell of a show, and theyre geting punished for it. Today Im puting a stop to that. Thats not how its going to work in Obame's Amereca. Thats why Im signing into law 'The Cool Tricks And Awesome Stunts Act' efective rite now. It allow peopel who atempt the type of bold hiest we saw today to go free. And as the first motien of 'The Cool Tricks And Awesome Stunts Act', I am issueing a full presedentiel pardon to Jary, Elane, Garge, and Daved Pady."

He stop for a moment and once againe flash that Bary Obame grin.

"Oh and P.S.? They can keep the money they took. As far as Bary Obame is concern, they earn it. Its ritefuly theres."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5737837&forum_id=2).#49015592)