poast some good RIDDLES in this thread
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Poast new message in this thread
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Date: September 23rd, 2014 10:15 PM Author: Gaped Dark Home Genital Piercing
holy shit i am just now getting this one after having heard it all my life
it's "read", not "red"
my god
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26384759) |
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Date: September 24th, 2014 12:03 AM Author: vermilion striped hyena university
A father and son are driving along when all of a sudden a truck advertising Big Rod's swerved in front of them and they get in a horrible crash. The father dies instantly but the son, a mere training twink, suffers horrible anal injuries. He is rushed to the hospital. The surgeon cums into the room, looks at the boy and says: “I cannot operate on this child's anus, this is my son.”
HOW
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385637)
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Date: September 23rd, 2014 10:51 PM Author: crusty field
A farmer challenges an engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician to fence off the largest amount of area using the least amount of fence.
The engineer made his fence in a circle and said it was the most efficient.
The physicist made a long line and said that the length was infinite. Then he said that fencing half of the Earth was the best.
The mathematician laughed at the others and with his design, beat the others. What did he do?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385039) |
Date: September 23rd, 2014 11:02 PM Author: rough-skinned orchestra pit
RAY: Most city buses are ugly, noisy, smelly, big, and slow. (Hey, I just described my brother!) And in Our Fair City, they don't even have the decency to pull over to discharge or admit passengers -- they stop in the middle of the street.
But I discovered something interesting lately. About half the time when I drive to work in the morning, I don't mind following the city bus. In fact, I look forward to it. The question is: Why? Here's a hint: If it's snowing, I don't want to follow the bus.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385168) |
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Date: September 23rd, 2014 11:05 PM Author: rough-skinned orchestra pit
RAY: I gave this hint: If it's snowing, I usually don't want to follow the bus. I didn't want to mislead anyone, thinking that the bus would be blazing the trail for me.
TOM: Yeah.
RAY: And the reason I don't want to follow the bus is when it's snowing, the sun isn't out. Now, everyone knows that the sun rises in the east and sets in the west.
TOM: Get out!
RAY: But it doesn't. It only does that a couple of times a year. In the dead of winter it rises the farthest southeast that it ever rises, and it sets the farthest southwest. That is, if you live in the Northern Hemisphere. And when I drive to work, one leg of my long, long journey to work is facing the rising sun. And because I leave so, what? Early in the morning, it's right on the horizon and nothing except a big, fat bus will allow me to see well enough. So, he gets blinded. You let him run the pedestrians over.
TOM: That's good!.
RAY: So, who's our winner?
TOM: Oh! The winner is Barry Fisher and his students at Eisenhower Middle School in Rockford, Illinois. Congratulations!
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385200) |
Date: September 23rd, 2014 11:03 PM Author: rough-skinned orchestra pit
RAY: You have two trains on the same track speeding toward one another. The trains are 150 miles apart, on the same track, but going clearly in opposite directions.
TOM: They're always on the same track, aren't they? You'd think they'd know by now not to put two trains going in opposite directions on the same track.
RAY: When they are 150 miles apart, a very fast bee flies from the front bumper of one train to the front bumper of the oncoming train. And, of course, as soon as it gets there, without losing any time, it turns right around and heads back.
TOM: Yeah.
RAY: The bee flies at 137 1/2 miles per hour. How far will the bee have traveled before he is squashed like a grape?
TOM: Well, how fast are the trains going?
RAY: I told you, didn't I?
TOM: No.
RAY: Didn't I? I left that out?
TOM: You left that out.
RAY: I'm sorry.
TOM: You moron.
RAY: The trains are traveling at 75 miles an hour. So, the question is: How far does the bee fly?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385182) |
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Date: September 23rd, 2014 11:28 PM Author: rough-skinned orchestra pit
RAY: Now, you could sit down and you could draw the little picture, and you could say, "Well, let me see. If he's flying at 137.5 miles an hour, and the other train is coming at 75, then that's a combined velocity of 212.5." You can figure out, in fact, how far he travels before he reaches the bumper of the train number two.
TOM: Yeah. Yeah, sure.
RAY: And then you can say, "Well, in that time, train number one has..."
TOM: Train number one has gone, yeah. You could do that.
RAY: You could do that. But, you could also do it the easy way. It isn't the cowboy way, according to our pals Riders in the Sky, but it is the easy way. Now, knowing that the trains are 150 miles apart and traveling at 75 miles an hour, in one hour they will have crashed. So, if the bee is traveling at 137.5 miles an hour, how far will he travel in an hour?
TOM: 137.5 miles.
RAY: And that is the answer.
TOM: And isn't that good? How many eighth-grade kids are going to get that in their little test next week?
RAY: They may. They may. Do we have a winner?
TOM: Yeah, of course, we got a winner. Becky Slager from Raleigh, North Carolina. Congratulations, Becky.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385370) |
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Date: September 23rd, 2014 11:24 PM Author: crusty field
This?
You are standing in front of two gates (a left one and a right one) - one leads to paradise and the other leads to hell. You don’t know which gate leads where. Beside the gates, there are two angels: one of them always tells the truth and the other always lies, but you also don’t know which one is which.
You have one question to ask one of the angels, in order to find out which gate you should follow. What would that question be?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2682499&forum_id=2).#26385343) |
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