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very odd situation occurred at a wedding i was at last weekend

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked...
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Date: July 11th, 2022 8:42 PM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater

there was a very strange little guy in the corner. he looked maybe 5’2”, but then when i saw him closer i noticed he was wearing these giant “moon boots” (i don’t know what else to call them) with like 6 inch soles, so no way he was even five feet in his socks. anyway, he spent most of the reception in the corner hunched over his phone, typing like a maniac and then howling with laughter. most people tried to just ignore him.

when all the speeches and everything started he drew up to the crowd and stood next to me. i was struck by how beautiful his face was; basically like a garden gnome version of jared leto. he looked up and asked if this was “an emotional wedding.” i didn’t really understand what he meant, so just nodded to be polite and he did his crazy laugh again. then the bride and groom started the first dance and he totally lost it. later on everybody was trying to figure out what he meant by screaming “justice” as loud as he could while crying, but i was the closest to him and i would swear he was screaming “duchess,” even though that makes even less sense. he wouldn’t respond to anyone asking him to calm down or leave so one of the groomsmen simply picked him up from under his arms and carried him outside. i went outside later to smoke a cigarette and he was still there. he was sitting on the curb for about two minutes with me watching him and then, i shit you not, he somehow swung his tiny legs over a deer that had wandered by and rode off.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44834802)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:38 PM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44835393)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:40 PM
Author: Gay Stock Car Pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44835407)



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Date: July 11th, 2022 10:41 PM
Author: aromatic mahogany stain background story



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44835413)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 12:15 AM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44835797)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:13 PM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44840314)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:17 PM
Author: idiotic filthy wagecucks



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44840325)



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Date: July 12th, 2022 8:21 PM
Author: deep bateful range



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44840330)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:39 PM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936377)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: brindle nighttime university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936392)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:43 PM
Author: avocado ticket booth french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936393)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:44 PM
Author: Exhilarant rigor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936396)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 9:50 PM
Author: Vigorous Depressive



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936409)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:09 PM
Author: Rusted Antidepressant Drug



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936490)



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Date: July 29th, 2022 10:20 PM
Author: Exhilarant rigor

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(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#44936539)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:37 PM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#45110563)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:39 PM
Author: Lake crusty faggot firefighter hall



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#45110574)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:40 PM
Author: claret voyeur



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#45110579)



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Date: September 2nd, 2022 2:41 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Fluffy Theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#45110585)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:14 AM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#46330823)



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Date: May 19th, 2023 11:17 AM
Author: Cerise space



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#46330840)



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Date: December 23rd, 2024 1:12 AM
Author: Dashing drunken orchestra pit volcanic crater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#48477480)



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Date: June 2nd, 2025 10:24 AM
Author: Robert Byrd Schitt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5151447&forum_id=2).#48980464)