been SLAYING girls by using the word "delta" more
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: July 8th, 2014 10:41 PM Author: Orange Institution
One weird trick, bros.
A while back I hit up an alumni happy hour for recent graduates of George Washington University. Technically, I wasn't invited: it was for college grads and I was a GW law grad. But I couldn't turn down the chance to mingle with young 20-something girls in legislative affairs jobs so I snuck in. Nobody checked my ID.
I chatted up this tall lanky girl, long arms and legs. She was wearing a dress that was floppy on her upper body, clearly meant to be held up by B cups that just weren't there. She had a giant head of dark brown hair. I couldn't tell if it was curly or just frizzy, but it was one of the two.
She engaged me in conversation, but was clearly scanning the room behind me, searching for a friend, an old professor, any excuse to ditch me. I knew I had only a minute or two.
I asked her what she had been doing since graduation. She said she had been working for a Democratic Congressman from New York, but had just gotten an offer to work in social media for a nonprofit and was still considering her options.
"What's the delta in salary?" I said
Her tight lips broke into a smile. She made eye contact with me and started playing with her hair. She then laughed and said she'd actually be making less, but with better benefits.
Within a half hour, the two of us ditched GW happy hour and were at a karaoke place. I bought her a drink, but when the bill came back they charged her for three drinks. She was really embarrassed and apologetic, told me she felt horrible about it. I told her I'd take care of it.
I called over the server, and said nineteen simple words: "there's a delta between the number of drinks we ordered, and the number of drinks we were charged for"
Within a few minutes, we had a new smaller bill, and it came with like a dozen free mints.
I proposed frozen yogurt, but she made it clear she wanted to go home with me as soon as possible. As we left the karaoke bar, I felt her literally pushing me out of the door and into a cab.
I woke up the next day and crawled out of bed to get to my doc review job on time. As I got up, she grabbed me by the arm and told me to stay. She wanted to cuddle some more.
"I can't let a delta open up between my start time and my arrival time," I said. "That would be bad for optics."
She swooned and fainted. I was free to go.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2613641&forum_id=2,#25894258) |
Date: July 9th, 2014 7:52 AM Author: Talented Fighting Chapel Juggernaut
Delta between OP's and my quality of poasting:
OP's
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180
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120
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mine
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2613641&forum_id=2,#25896106) |
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