There's this girl I've been working with for over a year at a local supermarket. We're both 21. I met her through the job and from day one, I was completely taken by her. She's easily the most attractive and beautiful woman I've ever met. Her smile genuinely made my day better. She's a gymnast and a total gym junkie. She works out every single day, sometimes for hours. It's basically her life. She's also smart, funny, insanely disciplined, and just captivating.

I started arranging my shifts to match hers. Maybe that sounds pathetic, but seeing her became the highlight of my week. We'd talk often at work, laugh, joke, and for a while, I felt like there was something building. I wanted her, but I didn't find the courage to ask. I had always dreamed of asking her out, but I was too shy and slow.

Eventually I found out where she worked out and I joined the same gym. Mainly to spend more time with her if I'm honest. I thought maybe if we started working out together, I'd find my moment.

That's when everything started to fall apart.

At the gym I saw this older man. Heavy build, long black beard, bald. He was always with her, watching her, training her, etc. It made me uneasy. Later I asked her about him and she said he was her personal trainer. His name is Mohamed and he's also apparently her coach and agent for her gymnastics work. She said they met a few months ago and that he's been coaching her since.

Still, I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more.

I did a little digging and found his Facebook. He's 43, originally from Syria, came to Iceland in 2016. His profile was filled with gym stuff, typical fitness content, political stuff about his home country and content about his religion. It shouldn't have meant anything, but it was bothering me so much.

I started asking my close friends about it to get their perspective. Some told me to let it go and others weren't so subtle. They said what I was scared to admit, that he wasn't just her trainer, that he was also sleeping with her, etc.

That idea crushed me. I've spent so long imagining something with her, hoping for something real. And the idea that she might be with someone twice our age, someone who is from a different culture, religion, and background, just broke me. I felt stupid, weak and depressed.

Eventually I found out it was true. She's living with him. They're a couple.

I don't really know why I'm posting this. Maybe because I've kept it bottled up. Maybe because I'm tired of pretending it doesn't bother me. Maybe because I just need someone to hear it.

I know I never made a move and maybe I waited too long. But it still hurts. I really liked her. And now I just feel like a ghost watching someone else's life unfold from the sidelines.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5743461&forum_id=2],#49051528)