"Nothing in the rules says a Golden Retriever can't do Biglaw!"
| harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 07/10/17 | | Razzmatazz jew | 03/11/15 | | Navy heaven | 03/11/15 | | yapping garrison tattoo | 03/11/15 | | yapping garrison tattoo | 03/11/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 03/11/15 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/11/15 | | zombie-like meetinghouse | 04/01/17 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 03/11/15 | | Cracking ticket booth | 03/12/15 | | bull headed curious lodge cumskin | 12/09/21 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 01/30/22 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/11/15 | | Bearded corn cake property | 03/11/15 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Charcoal Set | 03/11/15 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 03/11/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 03/11/15 | | dun razzle-dazzle yarmulke senate | 03/11/15 | | stirring water buffalo whorehouse | 03/12/15 | | bistre idea he suggested | 01/12/16 | | Odious Sienna Digit Ratio | 02/27/18 | | very tactful dopamine | 01/27/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/23/22 | | yellow mind-boggling tanning salon | 03/11/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | Rebellious fantasy-prone forum messiness | 03/11/15 | | cerebral indirect expression | 03/11/15 | | aphrodisiac pea-brained state | 03/15/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | cerebral indirect expression | 03/11/15 | | Lake rehab | 03/11/15 | | Charcoal Set | 03/11/15 | | Navy heaven | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | yapping garrison tattoo | 03/11/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 03/14/15 | | Lavender Really Tough Guy | 04/14/16 | | Metal theater place of business | 07/10/20 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/11/15 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 03/11/15 | | light nibblets | 03/11/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 03/11/15 | | soul-stirring business firm windowlicker | 03/11/15 | | Bearded corn cake property | 03/11/15 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/11/15 | | cerebral indirect expression | 03/11/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | drab church hominid | 04/03/15 | | Buff bespoke resort internal respiration | 05/08/15 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/12/16 | | Slippery friendly grandma | 10/28/16 | | Stimulating insane lay | 01/06/17 | | amber cuckoldry mood | 11/03/17 | | Chocolate awkward box office reading party | 12/01/17 | | milky soggy native associate | 11/02/19 | | french pocket flask masturbator | 05/08/15 | | dashing area | 05/08/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 09/18/15 | | bistre idea he suggested | 01/12/16 | | Bronze main people | 04/26/17 | | Odious Sienna Digit Ratio | 02/27/18 | | mildly autistic big-titted locus | 03/25/24 | | Dull Abode | 03/11/15 | | Aromatic ladyboy doctorate | 03/12/15 | | Titillating newt | 03/12/15 | | aphrodisiac pea-brained state | 03/15/15 | | Bonkers Dingle Berry | 03/15/15 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 01/27/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 01/30/22 | | arrogant pervert gaming laptop | 03/25/15 | | french pocket flask masturbator | 05/08/15 | | dashing area | 05/08/15 | | Chocolate awkward box office reading party | 08/14/17 | | Odious Sienna Digit Ratio | 02/27/18 | | Rambunctious cordovan stag film gay wizard | 10/13/18 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 01/27/22 | | frozen chrome range | 12/23/22 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 03/25/24 | | mildly autistic big-titted locus | 03/25/24 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | honey-headed massive stage coffee pot | 03/11/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 03/12/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | aphrodisiac pea-brained state | 03/15/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | yellow mind-boggling tanning salon | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | spectacular goyim | 03/15/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 03/12/15 | | brilliant impressive school cafeteria dysfunction | 01/27/22 | | Useless coiffed school therapy | 03/11/15 | | light nibblets | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 02/18/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/18/22 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 04/20/22 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 03/12/15 | | yellow mind-boggling tanning salon | 03/11/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | yellow mind-boggling tanning salon | 03/11/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | Frum prole center | 03/12/15 | | spectacular goyim | 03/15/15 | | frozen chrome range | 12/06/21 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 03/11/15 | | honey-headed massive stage coffee pot | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Spruce startled kitchen foreskin | 03/11/15 | | yapping garrison tattoo | 03/11/15 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 03/11/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/11/15 | | Appetizing sanctuary regret | 03/15/15 | | Crystalline personal credit line | 02/23/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/23/22 | | honey-headed massive stage coffee pot | 03/11/15 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 03/11/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/11/15 | | thriller institution mexican | 03/11/15 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 03/11/15 | | honey-headed massive stage coffee pot | 03/11/15 | | Bearded corn cake property | 03/11/15 | | dun razzle-dazzle yarmulke senate | 03/11/15 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 03/11/15 | | light nibblets | 03/11/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 03/12/15 | | floppy juggernaut people who are hurt | 03/12/15 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/12/15 | | yapping garrison tattoo | 03/12/15 | | Doobsian Insecure Macaca Goal In Life | 03/12/15 | | mewling disturbing roast beef haunted graveyard | 03/12/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/12/15 | | Titillating newt | 03/12/15 | | Histrionic Mustard Fortuitous Meteor Sound Barrier | 03/12/15 | | glittery piazza tank | 03/25/15 | | Galvanic umber casino | 03/25/15 | | Heady volcanic crater | 04/02/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 06/03/15 | | flatulent cruise ship nowag | 09/18/15 | | Sepia turdskin | 10/22/15 | | bistre idea he suggested | 01/12/16 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 01/12/16 | | cruel-hearted gaping | 05/26/16 | | Bronze main people | 07/14/16 | | Bronze main people | 12/25/16 | | Bronze main people | 04/26/17 | | contagious jade jap | 08/17/17 | | frozen chrome range | 01/28/20 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 12/09/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/09/21 | | Bateful low-t address | 03/25/24 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 10/12/25 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 03/11/15 | | confused carnelian toilet seat | 03/12/15 | | Seedy Fighting Nursing Home | 03/12/15 | | Brindle Sandwich Half-breed | 10/31/19 | | Self-absorbed Shrine Death Wish | 03/12/15 | | Misanthropic mad cow disease | 03/12/15 | | abnormal drunken stage | 03/12/15 | | Useless coiffed school therapy | 03/12/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/12/15 | | effete fuchsia blood rage | 03/12/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/12/15 | | aphrodisiac pea-brained state | 10/09/16 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 03/12/15 | | harsh gunner | 03/12/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | shimmering alpha library | 03/12/15 | | 180 community account point | 03/12/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/12/15 | | angry psychic | 03/12/15 | | Navy heaven | 03/12/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 01/12/16 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 12/10/21 | | brass fat ankles | 03/12/15 | | maize parlor | 03/12/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/12/15 | | black boyish puppy | 03/12/15 | | Titillating newt | 03/12/15 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 03/12/15 | | lilac cowardly den selfie | 04/14/16 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/12/15 | | confused carnelian toilet seat | 03/12/15 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/12/15 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/12/15 | | Buck-toothed exciting incel home | 03/12/15 | | balding multi-billionaire market | 10/13/18 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 02/18/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/13/15 | | Trip Shitlib Station | 03/13/15 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 03/14/15 | | Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse | 03/13/15 | | Charcoal Set | 03/14/15 | | Sable wagecucks | 03/14/15 | | Sable wagecucks | 03/14/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 03/15/15 | | spectacular goyim | 03/15/15 | | Bonkers Dingle Berry | 03/15/15 | | stirring water buffalo whorehouse | 03/16/15 | | Buck-toothed exciting incel home | 03/25/15 | | brass fat ankles | 03/25/15 | | vermilion vigorous legal warrant crotch | 03/25/15 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 04/03/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 06/03/15 | | 180 community account point | 03/25/15 | | glittery piazza tank | 03/25/15 | | Snowy weed whacker mad-dog skullcap | 03/25/15 | | harsh gunner | 04/02/15 | | Motley Disgusting Jewess | 04/03/15 | | Geriatric temple | 04/02/15 | | harsh gunner | 04/02/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 04/02/15 | | Heady volcanic crater | 04/02/15 | | thirsty passionate step-uncle's house | 04/03/15 | | scarlet multi-colored brethren | 04/03/15 | | turquoise violent marketing idea church building | 04/06/15 | | 180 community account point | 04/24/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 06/03/15 | | fragrant walnut brunch pozpig | 06/03/15 | | frozen chrome range | 06/10/15 | | wonderful potus kitty | 08/27/15 | | flatulent cruise ship nowag | 09/18/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 01/12/16 | | Grizzly autistic private investor wrinkle | 09/20/16 | | Bronze main people | 10/09/16 | | Racy indian lodge stain | 01/27/18 | | Brindle Sandwich Half-breed | 10/31/19 | | frozen chrome range | 12/06/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 02/22/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | vibrant site | 04/05/15 | | 180 community account point | 04/24/15 | | Histrionic Mustard Fortuitous Meteor Sound Barrier | 05/08/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 06/03/15 | | Provocative mint stead ape | 01/12/16 | | Crimson alcoholic spot filthpig | 01/27/18 | | 180 community account point | 04/24/15 | | 180 community account point | 05/08/15 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 08/27/15 | | Hairraiser menage | 04/14/16 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 12/06/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/10/21 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 10/12/25 | | Heady volcanic crater | 04/27/15 | | shimmering alpha library | 05/08/15 | | Carmine dog poop public bath | 06/03/15 | | Heady volcanic crater | 05/25/15 | | 180 community account point | 06/03/15 | | violent ruddy boistinker | 06/03/15 | | harsh gunner | 06/03/15 | | lascivious tripping famous landscape painting | 06/03/15 | | harsh gunner | 06/10/15 | | abnormal drunken stage | 07/27/16 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 06/10/15 | | Vivacious flesh depressive principal's office | 06/10/15 | | Navy heaven | 06/10/15 | | Charismatic theater stage faggotry | 06/10/15 | | 180 community account point | 07/21/15 | | Heady volcanic crater | 08/26/15 | | Razzmatazz jew | 08/26/15 | | saffron laughsome skinny woman national | 09/03/15 | | 180 community account point | 09/18/15 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 10/09/15 | | harsh gunner | 11/06/15 | | 180 community account point | 01/12/16 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 02/12/16 | | aphrodisiac pea-brained state | 03/12/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 03/20/16 | | federal diverse immigrant trump supporter | 03/20/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 04/10/16 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/10/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | talking pink quadroon crackhouse | 04/14/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 04/17/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 04/17/16 | | marvelous dilemma | 05/11/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 05/26/16 | | Bronze main people | 05/26/16 | | bat shit crazy crusty fanboi | 07/15/16 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/10/21 | | 180 community account point | 07/08/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 07/26/16 | | harsh gunner | 07/27/16 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/10/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Bronze main people | 08/30/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 10/09/16 | | Bronze main people | 10/09/16 | | Hairraiser menage | 10/09/16 | | harsh gunner | 10/09/16 | | 180 community account point | 10/13/16 | | mauve comical antidepressant drug trust fund | 12/25/16 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/10/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Bronze main people | 10/24/16 | | beta orchestra pit sneaky criminal | 10/27/16 | | marvelous dilemma | 12/18/16 | | Bronze main people | 12/25/16 | | Concupiscible Locale | 12/25/16 | | 180 community account point | 01/06/17 | | 180 community account point | 01/25/17 | | claret duck-like pit love of her life | 02/04/17 | | Bronze main people | 02/10/17 | | Hairraiser menage | 02/10/17 | | Chocolate awkward box office reading party | 04/01/17 | | claret duck-like pit love of her life | 05/27/17 | | cyan base | 05/27/17 | | Stimulating insane lay | 05/31/17 | | 180 community account point | 08/14/17 | | arousing ceo | 08/14/17 | | 180 community account point | 08/14/17 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 04/22/22 | | Olive house travel guidebook | 08/17/17 | | contagious jade jap | 08/17/17 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | exhilarant blathering queen of the night | 08/18/17 | | sapphire national security agency affirmative action | 09/01/17 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/22/22 | | chest-beating organic girlfriend | 11/03/17 | | Maroon rough-skinned genital piercing | 11/03/17 | | mentally impaired excitant university | 11/05/17 | | Brindle Sandwich Half-breed | 02/09/18 | | Hairraiser menage | 12/24/17 | | marvelous dilemma | 01/25/18 | | Hairraiser menage | 01/26/18 | | mildly autistic big-titted locus | 02/09/18 | | 180 community account point | 08/17/18 | | Opaque wild electric furnace mother | 06/17/19 | | Glassy Talented Gas Station | 09/23/19 | | Well-lubricated twinkling cuckold location | 10/31/19 | | Insanely Creepy Round Eye Boltzmann | 10/31/19 | | purple philosopher-king legend | 11/01/19 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 03/25/24 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 11/01/19 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 11/02/19 | | Insanely Creepy Round Eye Boltzmann | 11/02/19 | | Sinister Striped Hyena Theatre | 11/02/19 | | Supple Cuck | 01/28/20 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 02/21/22 | | Long Doobsian Flying J RedWang Hehe-ing | 12/19/25 | | beady-eyed clown preventive strike | 02/09/21 | | Vengeful henna twinkling uncleanness plaza | 12/06/21 | | balding multi-billionaire market | 12/06/21 | | Electric Lettuce Office | 12/06/21 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 03/02/22 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 10/05/22 | | frozen chrome range | 12/23/22 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 01/04/23 | | Rusted Hissy Fit | 02/06/24 | | mildly autistic big-titted locus | 10/12/25 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: March 11th, 2015 3:39 PM Author: cerebral indirect expression
"We forgot to file this motion! We'll never make it to the courthouse by 5, not with this traffic! Unless....."
*partners cast a thoughtful eye toward Buddy*
*James Brown's I Feel Good plays as Buddy bursts out the front door of the building with his necktie collar flapping over his shoulder and the motion in his TumiDog briefcase backpack as he races down the sidewalk*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470787) |
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Date: March 11th, 2015 5:23 PM Author: turquoise violent marketing idea church building
*buddy rushes through the front door behind someone else right before the security guard flips the sign from "open" to "closed"*
*security guard gives chase as buddy runs up to the judge's office*
Judge: "this is an outrage! in all my years on the bench, i've never seen a dog in the court house! if i had my way i'd--"
Cute Legal Assistant who's also the GF of the biglaw associate that brought in buddy: "Sir, that dog is a licensed attorney. He has just as much of a right to be here as you or me."
*guard and judge exchange quizical glances*
*cute legal assistant removes motion from TumiDogPack, hands to judge*
*she gives buddy a kiss and tells him to be a good boy--slips letter to her associate boyfriend in the DogPAck*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27471589) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 3:44 PM Author: harsh gunner
I'm imagining the set up as sort of a Mighty Ducks thing, where an asshole out of touch big lawyer winds up doing some community outreach event at an animal shelter. He winds up adopting the dog under pressure from either a dogloving ptr he wants to impress or a dog loving romantic interest. He's not a big fan of the dog but it loves him. So much so that, come Monday, it gets really distraught when the owner leaves and makes his way to the office...
Also tagline suggestions are welcome; my default will be " he's taking this case PRO Bone-o!"
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470814) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 3:51 PM Author: Provocative mint stead ape
closing scene: buddy turns out to be girl dog, gives birth under desk of gruff managing partner who had been threatening to make the office a dog-free zone throughout the movie
MP is won over by puppies, "well, i guess our new litter of first years means we can cancel the summer program!" as all laugh and scene wipes to credits
edit: on second thought this would work better as a scene playing out as the credits roll
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470860) |
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Date: March 11th, 2015 4:49 PM Author: Provocative mint stead ape
i was with it until i thought about what would happen when profits came in below projection in 3Q 2016
*MP on the phone on way to firm-sponsored caribbean retreat*
"i don't care if the no-kill shelter is closer and has space, you're to do as youre told"
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27471344) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 4:01 PM Author: yellow mind-boggling tanning salon
So the reason I wanted to get everyone on the call is bec-
*bloop bloop bloop*
Is... Is someone SLEEP YIPPING on my conference call????
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470955) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 4:02 PM Author: brass fat ankles
All Partners, Of-Counsel and Associates,
There will be a liverwurst cake for Buddy in the breakroom at 3 p.m. It is his 5th anniversary with the firm. Please come and make sure to sign his card which is going around in inter-office mail.
Also, while I have your attention, people have been leaving paper plates and cups in the breakroom rather than throwing them away. Several legal administrators have complained. In the future, please throw your trash away or have your Associate do it.
Thanks,
Office Manager
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470960) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 4:03 PM Author: honey-headed massive stage coffee pot
"What do you mean they won't settle!?!?! What kind of pitbull tactics are these?"
"Ummm... sir?"
"WHAT!?"
*silence*
"Golden retriever, actually."
*opening lick from Back in Black*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27470973) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 4:07 PM Author: brass fat ankles
All,
Jesus Fucking Christ. Who pissed on the copier this time?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27471013) |
Date: March 11th, 2015 4:52 PM Author: bat shit crazy crusty fanboi
Announcer Voice: "all his life, Mike dreamed of being a lawyer"
*shot of clock, 6pm Friday. boomer partner busts down door and throws project on Mike's desk*
"But dreams aren't always what they're supposed to be..."
*cut to CGWBT alone at restaurant, forlorn, staring at phone. waiter passes by* "Dinner alone again, miss?"
*cut to phone buzzing in vibrate on Mike's desk. Texts pop up: "where r u????" "this is the last time u stand me up!!"*
*camera pans to Mike hunched over documents, red pen in hand, bleary eyed*
And now Mike's life has gone...to the dogs. *shot of Mike passed out on desk as sun rises in the window*
*music shifts to mischievous buddy comedy beat. alert pops up on outlook: New Associate arrives today. Mike awakened by knock on door*
"Yeah, come in!"
*door opens, no one is there. mike looks confused. camera moves forward past the desk to reveal Buddy, tail wagging, wearing a tie and carrying a briefcase in his mouth*
Announcer: This summer, Mike will discover that you're never to old to learn some new tricks.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27471367) |
Date: March 12th, 2015 8:09 AM Author: Misanthropic mad cow disease
skadden partner at drafting session with CFO of gazprom
"yes ratmir if helpful let's do a page turn of the MD&A. buddy can u pass me the prosp..."
"hang on a sec...where is..."
*joe dirt style camera cuts to parking lot, buddy humping an irish setter, "SNOOP DOG - WHATS MY NAME" intro playing*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27475150)
|
Date: March 12th, 2015 1:14 PM Author: shimmering alpha library
Of Counsel: "Buddy is up for PARTNER??? But he's barely been here a year!"
Rainmaker: "The executive committee counts in dog years."
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27476372) |
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Date: March 12th, 2015 9:06 PM Author: Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse
*Biglaw Retriever carries papers in mouth, drops them at feet of bailiff*
*bailiff picks up papers and hands them to judge*
Judge: "Objection overruled, you may proceed, counselor."
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27479335) |
Date: March 12th, 2015 10:33 PM Author: Buck-toothed exciting incel home
*Buddy knocks over the flower vase in the lobby and he overeagerly greets new clients*
Associate chimes in, "Now that's what I call the spillable hour"
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27479779) |
Date: March 13th, 2015 12:48 AM Author: Silver at-the-ready rigpig bawdyhouse
"I can't decide if we should strike Juror number 6 or number 24 with our remaining peremptory."
*shows Buddy photo of Juror No. 24*
*Buddy growls*
*shows Buddy photo of Mrs. Patterson, Juror No. 6*
*Buddy darts out of the courtroom*
*after a few minutes, Buddy comes back enthusiastically leading a beaming, elderly Mrs. Patterson into the jury box*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27480687) |
Date: March 13th, 2015 1:08 AM Author: Trip Shitlib Station
Witness: I know that Mr. Howard was in on the deal because his neighbor Mrs. Adams told me she saw...
Buddy: *Barks sharply*
Judge: Objection sustained. Hearsay.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27480767) |
Date: March 14th, 2015 12:42 PM Author: Charcoal Set
We'd like to talk to you about your plans after you leave the firm. We've decided to bring in a new associate to take over your files.
http://imgur.com/1bWYub6
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27488047) |
Date: March 14th, 2015 2:40 PM Author: Sable wagecucks
"Associate Fido, we have a deadline tomorrow. I'm going to need you to do some digging into the caselaw tonight."
"R-ruff!"
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27488615) |
Date: March 25th, 2015 3:48 PM Author: Snowy weed whacker mad-dog skullcap
http://www.webvet.com/main/2012/05/28/3-dogs-college-degrees
It's hard enough for an intelligent, well-educated human to graduate law school -- let alone a dog. Yet Ellis, an 80-pound black lab, walked along with the New York Law School graduates in May of 2012 to receive his honorary degree from the school.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27553300) |
Date: April 2nd, 2015 11:13 PM Author: Geriatric temple
imagine the trailer for the sequel.
*Ja Rule's 'Living it Up' plays over a montage of wealth, success, magazine covers, etc. featuring Buddy*
Italian maître d at fancy restaurant: "Hey-ah, it's-a Buddy! So good you come-a to dinna, mama-mia!"
*paparazzi flash bulbs go off to recreation of spaghetti scene from Lady and the Tramp*
*scene switches to biglaw office full of associates drinking and cavorting with Buddy; splashing around in corner jacuzzi*
"Hey Buddy, the verdict is in! How much you think we won this time?"
*record needle screeches*
"We... LOST???"
*scene switches to rival firm's offices*
"Oh, what a CAT-astrophe for our little friend Buddy! Don't you think so... Fluffy?"
"Mrawgh!"
...
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27607642) |
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Date: April 2nd, 2015 11:27 PM Author: Heady volcanic crater
Midpoint of sequel:
The gorgeous blonde female associate, dressed in a skirted suit, enters a run-down bar. A smarmy first-year enters behind her, shows visible disgust at the bar's atmosphere. "Hepatitis central," he mutters. "I'll wait by the door."
But the female associate's not listening. She's heading toward a dark corner, where Buddy, tie loosened, looking disheveled, is sitting in hangdog fashion by a bowl and a half-filled bottle of scotch.
"Hi," she says softly. Buddy turns his head away from her.
"Let's go," the smarmy first-year calls from the door.
The female associate's eyes water slightly. Then her face turns hard in defiance. "The firm wanted me to come here and beg you to come back," she says. "But I won't. I won't beg. It's a trick I never learned, I guess. I know what they said about you. That all you had were 'tricks.' Well let me tell you something Buddy: those weren't tricks. What you did was some of the best damn lawyering this country's ever seen. But if you can't believe in yourself...well, I can't command you to. Anyway, goodbye, Buddy...Oh, and one more thing. Our next big case has just come in. The city's trying to tear down the Puppy Park on 3rd Avenue, apparently to make way for a new mosque. A shame you've given up on lawyering. We could have used you on this one..."
She turns and walks toward the bar. Buddy's head lifts and watches her.
"It's just a dog," the smarmy first-year says as she returns.
The female associate pauses, stares at him. "That dog was the sweetest, most sympathetic, most passionate lawyer I've ever met."
She brushes past, and the smarmy first-year gives a final look of disgust at the bar before leaving.
Buddy looks at his bowl of whiskey and stares into it. His own reflection shows, and slowly it fades into his younger, happier self.
Suddenly, with two barks, he's on his feet and running out the door.
The bartender, polishing a glass, smiles and nods. "Go get em, Buddy," he whispers.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27607760) |
Date: May 8th, 2015 2:21 PM Author: shimmering alpha library
HR: Good news Buddy, we added hearworm and flea meds to our health plan!
Buddy: *barks happily*
HR: We've also added spay and neuter coverage!
Buddy: *whimpers, tucks tail between his legs*
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#27849456) |
Date: January 12th, 2016 11:08 PM Author: 180 community account point
Maybe this movie can be a documentary?
http://www.gertsburglaw.com/about.html#alex
"Miles Davis Gertsburg
Miles Davis Gertsburg practices canine law. Hailing from tropical Cleveland, Ohio, and having graduated magna cum kibbles from the University of Wet-snout in Cambridge, Mr. Gertsburg is now the foremost expert in the United States on dog bite law, disputes between cats and dog, and disputes between humans about whether dogs are better than cats. As a dyed-in-the-fur litigator, Mr. Gertsburg advocates strongly for all clients, regardless of species."
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#29583770) |
Date: December 25th, 2016 4:00 PM Author: Concupiscible Locale
BigLaw Bud part 2:
korean opposing counsel has a novel strategy to defeat Bud ... but it involves a fork and knife.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#32227674) |
Date: September 1st, 2017 12:43 AM Author: sapphire national security agency affirmative action
he made equity partner
https://i.imgur.com/HsIjrxd.jpg
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2827574&forum_id=2],#34113484) |
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