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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Brindle hall coldplay fan
  12/29/15
b!
Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band
  12/29/15
C
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
c
demanding sanctuary
  12/29/15
a
Titillating internet-worthy kitty people who are hurt
  12/29/15
a
grizzly turdskin hairy legs
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Brindle hall coldplay fan
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
Magenta house french chef
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
?
Magenta house french chef
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Brindle hall coldplay fan
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
c for sure
Magenta house french chef
  12/29/15
C
grizzly turdskin hairy legs
  12/29/15
c
lake beady-eyed dilemma
  12/29/15
Xo
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Startling marketing idea
  12/30/15
C!
Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
House-broken histrionic church
  12/29/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/29/15
...
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
lake beady-eyed dilemma
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
adventurous resort
  12/29/15
lol ouch
exhilarant principal's office associate
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
Magenta house french chef
  12/29/15
...
Boyish Shrine
  12/30/15
...
filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
Citrine affirmative action main people
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Brindle hall coldplay fan
  12/30/15
2
exhilarant principal's office associate
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
Citrine affirmative action main people
  12/30/15
police
Startling marketing idea
  12/30/15
1
grizzly turdskin hairy legs
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  12/30/15
...
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  01/02/16
4 and 180
lake beady-eyed dilemma
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
lake beady-eyed dilemma
  12/30/15
...
Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
Copper Point Headpube
  01/11/16
...
slippery property
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Splenetic Indecent Crackhouse Police Squad
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
Multi-colored Library
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Brindle hall coldplay fan

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: demanding sanctuary

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Titillating internet-worthy kitty people who are hurt

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: grizzly turdskin hairy legs

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Brindle hall coldplay fan

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: Magenta house french chef

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Magenta house french chef

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Brindle hall coldplay fan

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: Magenta house french chef

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: grizzly turdskin hairy legs

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: lake beady-eyed dilemma

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Startling marketing idea

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Mahogany Parlor Elastic Band

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: House-broken histrionic church

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: lake beady-eyed dilemma

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: adventurous resort

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: exhilarant principal's office associate

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: Magenta house french chef

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: Boyish Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: filthy hyperactive old irish cottage selfie



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: Citrine affirmative action main people

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Brindle hall coldplay fan

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: exhilarant principal's office associate

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Citrine affirmative action main people

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Startling marketing idea

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: grizzly turdskin hairy legs

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: lake beady-eyed dilemma

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: lake beady-eyed dilemma

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: Abnormal giraffe scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: Copper Point Headpube

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: slippery property



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Splenetic Indecent Crackhouse Police Squad

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: Multi-colored Library



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2],#41284137)