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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Umber stubborn idiot hominid
  12/29/15
b!
glittery sickened base
  12/29/15
C
big bistre death wish den
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
c
Arousing Pozpig Parlor
  12/29/15
a
Out-of-control Wagecucks Water Buffalo
  12/29/15
a
Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
glittery sickened base
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Umber stubborn idiot hominid
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
glittery sickened base
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
Chocolate Boiling Water
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
?
Chocolate Boiling Water
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Umber stubborn idiot hominid
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
c for sure
Chocolate Boiling Water
  12/29/15
C
Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann
  12/29/15
c
histrionic flirting feces
  12/29/15
Xo
big bistre death wish den
  12/29/15
chaturbate
Diverse hyperactive degenerate
  12/30/15
C!
glittery sickened base
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
glittery sickened base
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Jade market
  12/29/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/29/15
...
big bistre death wish den
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
histrionic flirting feces
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
ruddy motley public bath incel
  12/29/15
lol ouch
cerebral mewling boistinker
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
Chocolate Boiling Water
  12/29/15
...
dun masturbator garrison
  12/30/15
...
Indigo Gas Station
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
At-the-ready lime hall
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Umber stubborn idiot hominid
  12/30/15
2
cerebral mewling boistinker
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
At-the-ready lime hall
  12/30/15
police
Diverse hyperactive degenerate
  12/30/15
1
Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
big bistre death wish den
  12/30/15
...
big bistre death wish den
  01/02/16
4 and 180
histrionic flirting feces
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
histrionic flirting feces
  12/30/15
...
big bistre death wish den
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
charcoal bat shit crazy senate
  01/11/16
...
submissive appetizing address
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
navy kitchen
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
sooty church dragon
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Umber stubborn idiot hominid

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: glittery sickened base

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: big bistre death wish den

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Arousing Pozpig Parlor

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Out-of-control Wagecucks Water Buffalo

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: glittery sickened base

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Umber stubborn idiot hominid

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: glittery sickened base

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: Chocolate Boiling Water

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Chocolate Boiling Water

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Umber stubborn idiot hominid

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: Chocolate Boiling Water

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: histrionic flirting feces

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: big bistre death wish den

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: Diverse hyperactive degenerate

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: glittery sickened base

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: glittery sickened base

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Jade market

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: big bistre death wish den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: histrionic flirting feces

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: ruddy motley public bath incel

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: cerebral mewling boistinker

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: Chocolate Boiling Water

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: dun masturbator garrison



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: Indigo Gas Station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: At-the-ready lime hall

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Umber stubborn idiot hominid

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: cerebral mewling boistinker

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: At-the-ready lime hall

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: Diverse hyperactive degenerate

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Aphrodisiac Cream Station Boltzmann

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: big bistre death wish den

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: big bistre death wish den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: histrionic flirting feces

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: histrionic flirting feces

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: big bistre death wish den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: charcoal bat shit crazy senate

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: submissive appetizing address



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: navy kitchen

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: sooty church dragon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Ã#41284137)