The number of different liquor stores I'd go to to avoid being seen as a drunk

The amount of times I'd drive out of town to a place where they'd sell beer a couple hours later than my town

Been sober for close to a year now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5862993&forum_id=2ﾃ｢竄ï½���„1¤77PHPSESSID=3d8e678aec504db068978830e992758d#49860613)

Stopping was harder than I thought it would be. When I was drinking heavily it wasn't that hard to stop for like a week or more at a time. And when I'd start again it wasn't some profound craving that sucked me back in; I just wanted to drink. So I didn't really feel like I was addicted.

This time was different. Some pretty intense cravings kicked in. So I did something of a taper. I had a drink or two a day for a few weeks.

Then I was sober for several months. Things were going pretty dang good. But the "big change" I had in mind wasn't absolute sobriety. What I had in mind was drastically cutting down and drinking like a normal person.

So in the fall of 2024, I started up again. And on paper, it genuinely wasn't that bad. It was probably less than 10 drinks a month with a max of 3 in a day. No cravings to drink into oblivion.

I kept that up until March of 2025. Unfortunately it became pretty clear that even this modest level of consumption was kicking off some pretty bad mental health stuff. So I stopped.

I'm still not committed to permanent sobriety. I fear making a huge commitment like that. What happens if I slip up? Am I going to think I'm cured and go back to drinking like I used to? Would I go into some shame spiral?

I'm just taking things day by day. Starting again isn't on my radar. My criteria for starting again would be being off meds + having no bad mental health for at least 6 months. I recently started taking an antidepressant for the first time, so drinking again isn't going to happen anytime soon.

It's a marathon, not a sprint.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5862993&forum_id=2ﾃ｢竄ï½���„1¤77PHPSESSID=3d8e678aec504db068978830e992758d#49863245)

There’s an obvious exception to his peripheral vision rule for TALL RICH SURFERS that women can project their lives onto.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5862993&forum_id=2ﾃ｢竄ï½���„1¤77PHPSESSID=3d8e678aec504db068978830e992758d#49863170)