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Good writers: Fix this clunky sentence I can't seem to fix

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
"C was seen driving in the X area, with D as a passenge...
aromatic lettuce
  04/30/21
they do if its an auto case. Contrib or comparative play a ...
purple genital piercing organic girlfriend
  04/30/21
Your sentence doesn't even say that A and B saw C and D, jus...
saffron base
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
Spruce beady-eyed principal's office chad
  05/02/21
Quick fixxx
Supple Hospital Kitty
  02/25/22
“As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a ...
Coiffed Location Incel
  04/30/21
...
anal laughsome goyim queen of the night
  04/30/21
i thought about breaking it up -- it worse because it puts e...
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
Ah m, okay. For some reason I assumed that D was the main pe...
Coiffed Location Incel
  04/30/21
C and D are both involved. I continue to use the term "...
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
"at this time" ROFL
aromatic lettuce
  04/30/21
Need to clarify at some point whether A or B were actually d...
purple genital piercing organic girlfriend
  04/30/21
Yeah I just worked with the isolated sentence in question b/...
Coiffed Location Incel
  04/30/21
You can do it in another sentence, but it's going to be impo...
purple genital piercing organic girlfriend
  04/30/21
While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car that C w...
Infuriating jew marketing idea
  04/30/21
...
unhinged twinkling uncleanness rehab
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving separately in the X area, they passe...
Talented stain
  04/30/21
This suggestion isn't meant to be used word for word, just g...
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  04/30/21
...
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
...
opaque faggot firefighter
  04/30/21
...
Citrine harsh electric furnace
  04/30/21
...
Obsidian potus
  04/30/21
Very clear, no ambiguity, reads like 1st order logic, I like...
Excitant Cumskin
  05/04/22
As A and B entered the X area, they looked at each other, an...
Drunken bistre circlehead
  04/30/21
...
fishy at-the-ready useless brakes
  04/30/21
...
Irradiated home people who are hurt
  04/30/21
FRIENDLESS FAGGOT BIRDSHIT A was driving some FAGgOt BIRdshi...
Vigorous school cafeteria
  04/30/21
...
Doobsian disrespectful stage milk
  04/30/21
...
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  04/30/21
...
Bateful crotch orchestra pit
  04/30/21
...
jet-lagged locale
  04/30/21
...
Ruby associate yarmulke
  04/30/21
...
opaque faggot firefighter
  04/30/21
...
crawly chapel
  04/30/21
...
Doobsian disrespectful stage milk
  05/01/21
As A and B were sucking each other’s cocks in the XXX ...
Doobsian disrespectful stage milk
  04/30/21
i think you nailed it.
anal laughsome goyim queen of the night
  04/30/21
...
Thriller business firm idiot
  04/30/21
i hope everyone appreciates the mental illness being perform...
anal laughsome goyim queen of the night
  04/30/21
...
racy keepsake machete
  04/30/21
A and B passed D and C, who was driving.
Burgundy Set Affirmative Action
  04/30/21
...
vibrant cordovan office
  04/30/21
sounds like a riddle
aromatic lettuce
  04/30/21
i hate this crap As A and B were driving in the X area, t...
aggressive indirect expression gunner
  04/30/21
i wish this works and it sounds nice but it seems slightly o...
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D (who...
aggressive indirect expression gunner
  04/30/21
doesn't it need "D's car"
marvelous theater legend
  04/30/21
it says he was driving, which means an automobile. if y...
aggressive indirect expression gunner
  04/30/21
Why do you need B, assuming A was driving. Don't say B was ...
purple genital piercing organic girlfriend
  04/30/21
you have to make it more exciting. keep the reader interest...
Clear mad-dog skullcap
  04/30/21
Were A and B both at the wheel?
crusty well-lubricated liquid oxygen
  04/30/21
turns out it was a tandem bicycle.
anal laughsome goyim queen of the night
  04/30/21
...
vibrant cordovan office
  04/30/21
As some faggot and his friend were driving in the restricted...
Bateful crotch orchestra pit
  04/30/21
The two cars passed in X. In one, A was driving B. In the ot...
Very tactful exhilarant depressive
  04/30/21
star crossed lovers. reads like brokeback mountain
Burgundy Set Affirmative Action
  04/30/21
still the best way to do it. He has more than a handful of i...
Very tactful exhilarant depressive
  04/30/21
...
Coiffed Location Incel
  04/30/21
Okay? Wow. Hey. Picture this: Cars A and B. Right? Going thr...
Irradiated home people who are hurt
  04/30/21
...
fishy at-the-ready useless brakes
  04/30/21
A and B, as was their custom from time to time, were engaged...
copper resort
  04/30/21
...
Impertinent gay wizard
  02/22/22
So, we need to talk about A driving around with B. Here's th...
Cyan wrinkle sneaky criminal
  04/30/21
400 km/h, 450 km/h, 500 km/h, 550 km/h; A could feel the for...
Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon
  04/30/21
Wow
Cyan wrinkle sneaky criminal
  04/30/21
I just copied this from a brief.
Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon
  04/30/21
...
jet-lagged locale
  04/30/21
Your stuff is the only stuff from here I share w my wife. E...
purple genital piercing organic girlfriend
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...
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  04/30/21
titcr.
vibrant cordovan office
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180
appetizing scarlet sanctuary
  04/30/21
...
opaque faggot firefighter
  04/30/21
...
Thriller business firm idiot
  04/30/21
holy shit
Histrionic Black Woman Shrine
  04/30/21
attn low attention span poasters read this whole thing pls
opaque faggot firefighter
  04/30/21
how
Burgundy Set Affirmative Action
  04/30/21
...
crawly chapel
  06/22/22
...
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
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Thriller business firm idiot
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Histrionic Black Woman Shrine
  02/22/22
this is incredible
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Histrionic Black Woman Shrine
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abnormal step-uncle's house
  05/04/22
wow
ocher generalized bond spot
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appetizing scarlet sanctuary
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azure internet-worthy turdskin
  06/22/22
High | level | legal work
Stimulating lemon meetinghouse
  04/30/21
...
racy keepsake machete
  04/30/21
Each of A and B were driving in AREA. They both passed a car...
Trip Temple Really Tough Guy
  04/30/21
A and B passed a car driven by C, who was transporting D as ...
Snowy institution nibblets
  04/30/21
two people, a & b, drove past c driving with d in his ca...
Transparent field rigpig
  04/30/21
C and his passenger D were traveling in X area. A overtook a...
claret fat ankles fanboi
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
fuchsia range
  04/30/21
Haven’t read any of the replies, so someone else may h...
haunting candlestick maker
  04/30/21
This was basically gromjoh's poast above except his was more...
Thriller business firm idiot
  04/30/21
...
Histrionic Black Woman Shrine
  04/30/21
...
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  04/30/21
...
Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon
  04/30/21
...
Histrionic Black Woman Shrine
  02/22/22
writing MFE's, any resources on improving clunky writing? I ...
Concupiscible site
  04/30/21
Did you try the hydro hack?
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  04/30/21
What’s that
Awkward stage
  04/30/21
You should drink more water, you're probably dehydrated. Th...
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  04/30/21
...
opaque faggot firefighter
  04/30/21
Just write in the active voice with short simple sentences, ...
chocolate native fortuitous meteor
  04/30/21
A and B saw C driving in X
chocolate native fortuitous meteor
  04/30/21
andy and brad were driving around brooklyn when they passed ...
boyish whorehouse love of her life
  04/30/21
I am gay
confused water buffalo kitty cat
  04/30/21
great thread
Thriller business firm idiot
  04/30/21
Shitty writing is putting too much into one sentence. A and...
Comical plaza pisswyrm
  04/30/21
A and C, drivers, were in different cars, driving through ar...
Clear mad-dog skullcap
  04/30/21
...
Clear mad-dog skullcap
  05/02/21
...
Clear mad-dog skullcap
  05/23/21
Where are we on this? Thank
yellow underhanded gaming laptop
  05/02/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
Impertinent gay wizard
  02/22/22
OP, does this help?
aromatic lettuce
  02/25/22
i don't think anyone reads shitlaw shitpaper so it doesn't m...
umber federal point
  06/22/22
...
Pet Relief Area
  04/19/26
"and containing D as" -> "in which D was&q...
UN peacekeeper
  04/19/26
Lots of helpful suggestions in this thread but I’m not...
tubby spastic 11yo playing in toddler section
  04/19/26
...
Pet Relief Area
  04/19/26


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:48 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C and containing D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376133)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:57 AM
Author: aromatic lettuce

"C was seen driving in the X area, with D as a passenger, by both A and B."

(no one gives a fuck whether A and B were driving or doing a standing 69 at the time they saw these faggots)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376836)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 12:01 PM
Author: purple genital piercing organic girlfriend

they do if its an auto case. Contrib or comparative play a role potentially. Better to keep it clean.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376873)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 2:10 PM
Author: saffron base

Your sentence doesn't even say that A and B saw C and D, just that they passed them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377665)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:40 PM
Author: Spruce beady-eyed principal's office chad

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42386999)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 25th, 2022 1:42 PM
Author: Supple Hospital Kitty
Subject: Quick fixxx

As A and B were driving in X, they passed a car driven by C containing D as a passenger.

EDIT: LMAO at the date

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032731)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:52 AM
Author: Coiffed Location Incel

“As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C. D was a passenger in C’s car at the time.”

Would break up the sentences. Your original sentence isn’t terrible though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376145)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:53 AM
Author: anal laughsome goyim queen of the night



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376148)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend

i thought about breaking it up -- it worse because it puts emphasis on "D was a passenger in C’s car at this time" -- which is a minor detail.

it doesn't really matter whether C or D is the driver.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376159)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:56 AM
Author: Coiffed Location Incel

Ah m, okay. For some reason I assumed that D was the main person.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376166)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:03 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend

C and D are both involved. I continue to use the term "C's car" for clarity

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376201)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:51 AM
Author: aromatic lettuce

"at this time"

ROFL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376807)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:54 AM
Author: purple genital piercing organic girlfriend

Need to clarify at some point whether A or B were actually driving. Or were they in two separate cars, both of which passed C.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376155)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: Coiffed Location Incel

Yeah I just worked with the isolated sentence in question b/c I didn’t know what the surrounding sentences are like.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376160)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:04 AM
Author: purple genital piercing organic girlfriend

You can do it in another sentence, but it's going to be important to be clear who was driving in the passing car.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376205)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: Infuriating jew marketing idea

While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car that C was driving with a passenger, D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376157)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:57 AM
Author: unhinged twinkling uncleanness rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376168)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:58 AM
Author: Talented stain

As A and B were driving separately in the X area, they passed a car driven by C which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376174)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop

This suggestion isn't meant to be used word for word, just generally to give you the right idea on how to handle this sort of thing, please develop as part of an exercise in your own development as a lawyer. Really need to break this into clauses that explain everything.

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C and containing D as a passenger.

WHEREAS A, B, C, and D are human persons domiciled in Jurisdiction Y

WHEREAS X is a certain area in Jurisdiction Y

WHEREAS A, B, and C are legally authorized to operate motor vehicles ("cars" and each individual such vehicle a "car")

WHEREAS on that certain date, A, B, and C were operating cars.

WHEREAS on that certain date, D was a passenger in the car operated by C.

Now, therefore be it resolved, on that certain date, the aforementioned cars traversed on intersecting paths in Area X.

[I assume by "passed" you mean "passed" as in "they passed by each other while headed in different directions," revise if you mean they were going the same way and A/B's cars passed/overtook C's car.]

Please handle and recirculate, thanks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376176)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:03 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376203)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:45 AM
Author: opaque faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376392)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:08 AM
Author: Citrine harsh electric furnace



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376526)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:25 AM
Author: Obsidian potus



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376657)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 4th, 2022 12:40 PM
Author: Excitant Cumskin

Very clear, no ambiguity, reads like 1st order logic, I like it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44453959)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: Drunken bistre circlehead

As A and B entered the X area, they looked at each other, and although none of them said a word, they understood each other perfectly. It was X area after all. Are there any Xs around, they wondered? They passed a beaten-up vehicle with ridiculous oversized chromed wheels with C as a driver and D as a passenger. X's! - thought A and B. C and D did not think anything. They were high.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376178)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:36 AM
Author: fishy at-the-ready useless brakes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376332)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: Irradiated home people who are hurt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376340)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: Vigorous school cafeteria

FRIENDLESS FAGGOT BIRDSHIT A was driving some FAGgOt BIRdshit car alone(some other NIFmGGA was drivomg alone in another car) they passed ALPHA TURD C , who has MANY DRINKING BUDDIES, SO NATURALLY HAD A PASSENGER (most likely an AZNgirl getting wet for MAMMOTH TURDCOCK)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376183)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: Doobsian disrespectful stage milk



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376187)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376195)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:18 AM
Author: Bateful crotch orchestra pit



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376249)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:47 AM
Author: jet-lagged locale



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376406)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:36 AM
Author: Ruby associate yarmulke



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376713)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:37 AM
Author: opaque faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376724)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 12:32 PM
Author: crawly chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377057)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 1st, 2021 12:19 AM
Author: Doobsian disrespectful stage milk



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42380818)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: Doobsian disrespectful stage milk

As A and B were sucking each other’s cocks in the XXX area, C drove by with D cumming in his ass.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376184)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: anal laughsome goyim queen of the night

i think you nailed it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376191)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 3:36 PM
Author: Thriller business firm idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378174)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: anal laughsome goyim queen of the night

i hope everyone appreciates the mental illness being performed right now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376189)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:28 AM
Author: racy keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376669)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: Burgundy Set Affirmative Action

A and B passed D and C, who was driving.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376194)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: vibrant cordovan office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376341)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:52 AM
Author: aromatic lettuce

sounds like a riddle

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376816)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: aggressive indirect expression gunner

i hate this crap

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D driving with C.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376197)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:05 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend

i wish this works and it sounds nice but it seems slightly off

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376206)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:06 AM
Author: aggressive indirect expression gunner

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D (who was driving with C).

This is it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376211)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:07 AM
Author: marvelous theater legend

doesn't it need "D's car"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376216)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:42 AM
Author: aggressive indirect expression gunner

it says he was driving, which means an automobile.

if you think specifying what kind of automobile is a key detail then can add that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376370)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:05 AM
Author: purple genital piercing organic girlfriend

Why do you need B, assuming A was driving. Don't say B was driving. Ever. If he wasnt.

As A was driving, they passed ...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376208)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:06 AM
Author: Clear mad-dog skullcap

you have to make it more exciting. keep the reader interested.

"Where did this take place? In X. And what happened in X? A and B were together in a car. And what did that car do? Why it passed by another car, a car driven by C. And was C alone in that second car? No, no C was not. C was with D. That's right. A and B passed C and D. It's all true."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376212)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:08 AM
Author: crusty well-lubricated liquid oxygen

Were A and B both at the wheel?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376217)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:13 AM
Author: anal laughsome goyim queen of the night

turns out it was a tandem bicycle.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376233)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:20 AM
Author: vibrant cordovan office



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376607)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:18 AM
Author: Bateful crotch orchestra pit

As some faggot and his friend were driving in the restricted area, they passed a car driven by a nigger and containing some other faggot as a passenger. Regards, I hope this helps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376246)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:26 AM
Author: Very tactful exhilarant depressive

The two cars passed in X. In one, A was driving B. In the other, C was driving D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376290)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:29 AM
Author: Burgundy Set Affirmative Action

star crossed lovers. reads like brokeback mountain

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376306)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:31 AM
Author: Very tactful exhilarant depressive

still the best way to do it. He has more than a handful of items to hit: location, two cars, who was each driver and who was each passenger, that they passed.

This does it and leaves no uncertainty at all

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376317)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:34 AM
Author: Coiffed Location Incel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376330)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:35 AM
Author: Irradiated home people who are hurt

Okay? Wow. Hey. Picture this: Cars A and B. Right? Going through section X. *makes large "X" using forearms* And boom! Right there, they pass car C. *makes "C" using hand* A car which, at the time, was containing D *unzips pants* as a passenger. *pulls cock out of fly* Any questions?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376331)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: fishy at-the-ready useless brakes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376336)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:40 AM
Author: copper resort

A and B, as was their custom from time to time, were engaged in that most fanciful of modern hobbies, navigation of modern paved roads in a device propelled by an internal combustion engine, whence, they happened to pass by and through the X area. It was delightful that time of year and a welcome respite from their usual tiresome surroundings. And, as fate or chance, or even perhaps the Muses had it, another fellow engaged in the very same hobby happened by. Of course, known to them, and combustion engine navigators the State over, twas C along with D. Both were fair fellows and known to A and B. As custom would insist they happened both to notice and acknowledge each other, hobbyists in the same pursuit as they were.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376358)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:09 AM
Author: Impertinent gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008930)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: Cyan wrinkle sneaky criminal

So, we need to talk about A driving around with B. Here's the thing: they were in X area, and what's problematic is they passed by C—yes, THAT C. C had a passenger at the time, D. Here's why that's not okay.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376389)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:45 AM
Author: Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon

400 km/h, 450 km/h, 500 km/h, 550 km/h; A could feel the force of the acceleration pressing him against the sport bucket seats of his Turbo Allegra Mk. 2, their soft, well-sourced alcantara cosseting his tightly leather chapped legs, the micromechanical motors within instantaneously adjusting to each minor perturbation in the vehicle's three-axis orientation to keep him perfectly balanced, its SWIFT systems scanning kilometers ahead of them in real-time and predictively modulating the various electromagnetic and anti-kinetic shielding systems in order to protect their passage as they rocketed upward toward the gateway to area X--area X, the Sacred Seat of Cybernetic Heaven, its secrets whispering to the hovels of his birthplace below, beckoning brave boys with the Siren Song: "Come, Unlock Our Treasurehosue of Wonder or Die Trying"; "It's a goddamn marvel--" that was B, his copilot jockey, in the seat beside him--he'd always liked the tech stuff, engineered things were his jig and jive and the natural knack he'd expressed for them had been evident since his Fourth Year when he'd spontaneously programmed a molecular excavator during off time while the rest of the class was at the playground; he and B had been practicing for this for over three years, secretive sessions when the sensor rings slipped from alignment every third week on Sunday for maintena--"we have a fucking BOGEY at 3 o'clock HIGH!" B screamed, interrupting his meditation on the past--the systems of the Allegra were fast, but B was faster and he'd spotted the incoming a split second before the computerized indication of the same: "Warning, SWIFT has detected an intrusion in the third--" he cut off the computer; he knew what he needed to know: C was moving to intercept them in his Outrigger, accompanied by D; they'd planned for this eventuality, both the conflict itself and the psychology of facing your own brother and cousin 45 kilometers up in the air, each precise maneuver tiptoeing on the razor thin edge between life and death, a minute miscalculation capable of throwing you off the wrong side into a fiery midair death--there was something poignant about it, the notion that he could die up here in an instant and to his friends and family in the warrens of Bressville below, toiling through their daily tasks with no comprehension of the enormous aerial pageantry above them, his life could blot out with no greater signifier than a vanishing spot of light in the sky; he banished the thought of this and other things as he shouted in the cockpit "let's smoke these fuckers" and pushed down hard on the throttle, the frame of the Allegra bending, straining, complying with the command as they soared to meet the enemy head on, he and B laughing aloud at the thrill of it all.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376393)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:47 AM
Author: Cyan wrinkle sneaky criminal

Wow

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376411)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:49 AM
Author: Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon

I just copied this from a brief.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376419)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:15 AM
Author: jet-lagged locale



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376574)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:54 AM
Author: purple genital piercing organic girlfriend

Your stuff is the only stuff from here I share w my wife. Every time, I explain that "It's just lawyers--we get bored at work--yeah, I know, that's what makes it funny--"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376824)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 1:21 PM
Author: appetizing scarlet sanctuary



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377415)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:00 AM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008886)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:32 AM
Author: ocher generalized bond spot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722509)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:51 AM
Author: unhinged twinkling uncleanness rehab



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376432)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:05 AM
Author: vibrant cordovan office

titcr.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376504)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:10 AM
Author: appetizing scarlet sanctuary

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376531)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:18 AM
Author: opaque faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376589)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:23 AM
Author: Thriller business firm idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376641)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:24 AM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376648)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: opaque faggot firefighter

attn low attention span poasters read this whole thing pls

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376708)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:13 PM
Author: Burgundy Set Affirmative Action

how

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377366)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:36 AM
Author: crawly chapel



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722527)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:35 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376711)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 12:00 PM
Author: 180 Disgusting Haunted Graveyard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376866)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 12:01 PM
Author: Odious Trailer Park



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376872)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 3:27 PM
Author: Thriller business firm idiot



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378128)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 1st, 2021 9:20 PM
Author: 180 Disgusting Haunted Graveyard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42558237)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:00 AM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008882)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: 180 Disgusting Haunted Graveyard

this is incredible

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008910)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 25th, 2022 1:39 PM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032706)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 4th, 2022 12:31 PM
Author: abnormal step-uncle's house



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44453902)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:31 AM
Author: ocher generalized bond spot

wow

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722507)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:34 AM
Author: appetizing scarlet sanctuary



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722517)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:44 AM
Author: azure internet-worthy turdskin



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722548)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:49 AM
Author: Stimulating lemon meetinghouse

High | level | legal work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376422)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:28 AM
Author: racy keepsake machete



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376672)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:55 AM
Author: Trip Temple Really Tough Guy

Each of A and B were driving in AREA. They both passed a car driven by C with D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376456)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:05 AM
Author: Snowy institution nibblets

A and B passed a car driven by C, who was transporting D as a passenger, as they drove through the X area.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376505)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:07 AM
Author: Transparent field rigpig

two people, a & b, drove past c driving with d in his car.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376517)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:13 AM
Author: claret fat ankles fanboi

C and his passenger D were traveling in X area. A overtook and passed them. B overtook and passed them too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376555)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:19 AM
Author: fuchsia range

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C, which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376600)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:24 AM
Author: haunting candlestick maker

Haven’t read any of the replies, so someone else may have made the same suggestion, but I’d go with:

While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car containing C (driver) and D (passenger).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376651)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:27 AM
Author: Thriller business firm idiot

This was basically gromjoh's poast above except his was more concise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376665)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376704)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:40 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376736)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 2:08 PM
Author: Soul-stirring filthy tanning salon



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377648)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:01 AM
Author: Histrionic Black Woman Shrine



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008887)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:33 AM
Author: Concupiscible site

writing MFE's, any resources on improving clunky writing? I recently jumped from GOV to tech

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376695)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:33 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop

Did you try the hydro hack?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376699)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:40 AM
Author: Awkward stage

What’s that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376738)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:41 AM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop

You should drink more water, you're probably dehydrated. This will, among other things, improve cognitive function and therefore improve your writing. While you're at it also check your posture I bet you're slouching right now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376746)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:49 AM
Author: opaque faggot firefighter



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376800)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 1:17 PM
Author: chocolate native fortuitous meteor

Just write in the active voice with short simple sentences, subject verb object. Not hard

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377389)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 1:16 PM
Author: chocolate native fortuitous meteor

A and B saw C driving in X

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377381)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 1:28 PM
Author: boyish whorehouse love of her life

andy and brad were driving around brooklyn when they passed carl and dave in their car.

this doesn't define who is driving and who is riding though.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377449)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 1:38 PM
Author: confused water buffalo kitty cat

I am gay

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377484)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 3:36 PM
Author: Thriller business firm idiot

great thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378176)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 3:39 PM
Author: Comical plaza pisswyrm

Shitty writing is putting too much into one sentence.

A and B were driving in the X area. [query: are they both driving separate cars?] C driving D passed them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378186)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 8:29 PM
Author: Clear mad-dog skullcap

A and C, drivers, were in different cars, driving through area X, and with them were B and D, passengers; B was with A while D was with C; A and B passed by C and D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42379691)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:50 PM
Author: Clear mad-dog skullcap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42387061)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 23rd, 2021 3:44 PM
Author: Clear mad-dog skullcap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42509184)



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Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:36 PM
Author: yellow underhanded gaming laptop

Where are we on this? Thank

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42386977)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:06 AM
Author: Impertinent gay wizard

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C in which D was a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008916)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 25th, 2022 1:44 PM
Author: aromatic lettuce

OP, does this help?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032743)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:32 AM
Author: umber federal point

i don't think anyone reads shitlaw shitpaper so it doesn't matter. aren't state court judges borderline retarded?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722512)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2026 12:23 PM
Author: Pet Relief Area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827186)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2026 12:42 PM
Author: UN peacekeeper

"and containing D as" -> "in which D was", otherwise fine

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827205)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2026 1:15 PM
Author: tubby spastic 11yo playing in toddler section

Lots of helpful suggestions in this thread but I’m not sure we’ve got it figured out just yet. Let’s put a pin in it and move on. OP: what’s the next sentence?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827228)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2026 2:57 PM
Author: Pet Relief Area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827363)