i'm actually a decent looking guy, too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4979906)

Horace, you gotta fake some confidence and act successful. And watch some porn for some good instruction.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980146)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980001)

are you single?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980205)

ZING!!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980378)

i edited for realism.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980485)

*sobs*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980515)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980293)

what was that dood's name...? something like that...Onan?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4979969)

he's just the most asexual person ive ever met.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4979996)

perfect for a virgin like you. they advertise in the washington post sports section every weekday. apparently it's very common for hill staffers to go.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4979956)

edit: i'm very shy

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980052)

I have a tattoo of a robot someone drew on their torts final.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980223)

the crown of thorns has driven into the flesh to the bone, and the blood drips down into Christ's matted beard. nothing is muddied up; you can see His face as clear as you can see where the whips came down, the wound in His side, the arms pulled out of the sockets, and the broken legs.

i call it "the Power and the Passion." it's from a drawing of mine.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980297)

edit: is there a christian theme? my art is devoted to my relgion.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980346)

You could do a mural of an NYU law student smiting Stern like Gomorrah.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980399)

he should take a gradual desensitization approach.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980287)

human nature and simple curiousity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980457)

I dated a girl on and off for 2 years and had sex 200 times and it was never nearly as good as any of the sex I have now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4980417)

Horace, :D,

The morning of Friday has now come and gone. A few questions and requests:

1. When did you begin seriously trying to lose your virginity?

2. Was it not foreseeable that by mega-posting on xoxo and growing into psychotic morons that you were thereby committing yourself to an extensive loserfucker project that would require you to begin trying to lose your virginity before whatever your answer to #1 above is?

3. In our review session before the 4:00 am role call you sermonized about the professional responsibilities of prestigious xoxo poster. Because we would hold such weighty responsibilities in our careers on the internets you said that you would impose similar responsibilities regarding all threads. In particular, you made it clear that you would brook no excuse regarding a ttt post made after the 8 hour time limit. You made it clear that we were responsible for planning ahead and ensuring that the 8 hour time limit would be honored. Do you feel no reciprocal responsibility toward us, your readers and co-posters? A responsibility that extends beyond ex post facto apologies?

4. Please stop saying "I'm so horny". A) The phrase has lost all meaning from constant repetition throughout the entire history of the board. B) Few posters believe you. C) Fewer posters care whether you subjectively impose upon yourself an appropriate level of guilt.

Sincerely, wiener

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352653&forum_id=2#4988739)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4988774)

I lost my virginity when I was 16 on a high school art trip to the U.K. I was drinking one night with my roommate and he left our hotel room to fuck some other girl that went on the trip. Lonely and drunk, I jumped out the window and took the Underground to Soho, got 100 pounds out of an ATM and asked some random black dude where I can get a hooker. He led me to some cheap room with a skanky big boned women and she took all my money.

She pulled down her panties and pulled down my pants and slipped a condom on. Then I got on top of her and fucked her loose cunt for about 10 minutes till I got tired. Then she asked me for hand relief and I responded with a "huh" Then she pushed me off her and jacked me off till I blew my load in the condom. After that, she kicked me out.

Then I walked out and I got on the wrong Underground subway and got off somewhere. I left the Underground station and walked out to some desserted area of the city. A guy asked me if I wanted to buy some grass and I was like "yuh maybe." Then i changed my mind, but he continued to walk with me asking me how much money I had. Then he put his arm around me and a pen to my neck and said "I don't want to get mean." So I threw my wallet at him, which luckily didn't include my ATM card, just my student ID and some other BS, and I ran around the block and I got lost. Eventually I found another Underground station, but it was barred closed. So I kept running/walking.

I eventually made it to a large street, but it was almostly completely isolated, one car every 10 seconds or so. Finally, I hailed a taxi and asked him about taking me to an ATM and my hotel's district, but he drove off. Then I got another taxi and just told him to goto my hotel's district and told him along the way I didn't have any money and we needed to stop at an ATM somwhere. He got me to an ATM and then to my hotel's district. I found my hotel and walked in the front door, got in my hotel room and passed out.

While the sex was crap and I was drunk, the bottom line is I got the monkey off my back and no STDs.

P.I.M.P

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=352068&forum_id=2#4992002)