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Rowan, your fate approaches {JiGSaW}

*You wake up seated at a table in the center of a small room...
pungent chapel
  10/24/09
*waits patiently for rowan to respond*
overrated degenerate feces
  10/24/09
ITT jigsaw jumps the shark
swollen crusty state keepsake machete
  10/24/09
cr
duck-like den
  10/24/09
titcr. booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Citrine provocative library
  10/24/09
lol this is great
federal trust fund newt
  10/24/09
I don't feel like going out tonight. I'd really rather stay ...
Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth
  10/24/09
but do you check cornflakes or other
overrated degenerate feces
  10/24/09
Duly edited.
Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth
  10/24/09
you don't want to be another fish or d do you
Racy school cafeteria
  10/24/09
Wasn't trying to be. I was pretty sure from the way the test...
Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth
  10/24/09
*Your waiter stops in to collect the postcard, then returns ...
pungent chapel
  10/24/09
this was dumb; you might want to edit before anyone else rea...
Racy school cafeteria
  10/24/09
stfu
Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike
  10/24/09
fuck yeah
Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike
  10/24/09
The other dates: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Willis ...
pungent chapel
  10/24/09
nice
federal trust fund newt
  10/24/09
damnit i wish she picked the acid guy. what a stupid bitch
Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike
  10/24/09
decent, and it fits Rowan
federal trust fund newt
  10/24/09
180 I'm loving all of these ROWAN PICK A GHOST MONIKER NO...
indigo cruel-hearted location
  10/24/09
180
Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth
  10/24/09
LOL, these are fantastic. * eagerly waits
Zombie-like regret stain
  10/24/09
http://upit.section31.us/uploads/jackson4.gif
contagious insecure useless brakes
  10/24/09
there it is
federal trust fund newt
  10/24/09
lol pensive has herpes. 180
thriller blathering home
  10/24/09
yea that part was great
Racy school cafeteria
  10/24/09
who is the first guy?
maize international law enforcement agency menage
  10/24/09
this one was pretty bad
henna resort philosopher-king
  10/24/09
who the fuck r u to judge? go fuck ur dad in his hairy, tig...
Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike
  10/24/09
...
pontificating address
  01/10/12


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:35 AM
Author: pungent chapel

*You wake up seated at a table in the center of a small room. You are comfortable, unrestrained, and in no immediate danger should you remain relatively still. Across the table is another chair, and both places have been set with a lit candle, a glass of water, and an index card. Both index cards have two sets of checkboxes. The first set allows you to select between "Cornflakes" and "Other." The second has options for "Soda" and "Wine." You notice a quill pen and a book of matches resting on the center of the table.

As you take in the rest of your surroundings, you notice many glass globes suspended around the room. Each one is attached to both the ceiling and the floor by twine. You also notice that the floor tiles are white and light blue, arrayed in a checkerboard pattern, with the globes only attached to the blue tiles. The tiles immediately surrounding the table are all white, and there is a pathway of white tiles leading from the opposite side of the table to the door.*

Hello Rowan. I want to play a game with you. For years you have degraded yourself, desperately seeking companionship in the arms of men who can only be described as society's misfits. Today, you have one final chance to find love. There is a photograph taped to the underside of the table. This photograph contains your choices:

http://img21.imageshack.us/img21/5772/choicesz.jpg

1. Accomplished and successful, but has severe problems with fidelity and is not a nice person. A fellow student.

2. Has an interesting occupation and has seen his share of ups and downs in life. Likes to work with his hands. You think you might recognize him from somewhere. A bit older than you would prefer, but then again, your shelf life is rapidly decreasing. Cleans up nicely.

3. Hardworking and an entrepreneur. Extremely caring and willing to let his guard down to show his emotions. Will you date an African American though?

4. Not particularly witty, intelligent, or engaging. Displays a reckless disregard for how others perceive him. Has herpes. A fellow student.

5. Very fit and loves the outdoors. Works in the medical field and has a spontaneous personality. Mildly crippled.

Each of these potential dates will bring protection to prevent any unexpected consequences from the evening. They have also each been instructed to make every effort to avoid stepping on any blue tiles. Your fellow students may or may not have been provided with additional instructions beyond this. At the conclusion of the evening, you will be free to go. However, do not attempt to escape at any time prior to this. Make your choice now, Rowan. How will you spend your evening? What will you order for dinner? And how will you interact with your date? Heed this final piece of advice Rowan: if you do not remain true to the singular, dominating characteristic that makes you who you are, you will perish. Let the games begin.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070970)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:36 AM
Author: overrated degenerate feces

*waits patiently for rowan to respond*

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070974)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:38 AM
Author: swollen crusty state keepsake machete

ITT jigsaw jumps the shark

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070980)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:39 AM
Author: duck-like den

cr

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070987)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:20 AM
Author: Citrine provocative library

titcr.

booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071108)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:39 AM
Author: federal trust fund newt

lol this is great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070983)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:40 AM
Author: Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth

I don't feel like going out tonight. I'd really rather stay in and watch TV, or the globes, if that's all that's available. I can make my tile-stepping decisions on my own.

Oh, and I'll have "Other," since I hate healthy breakfast cereals, and "Wine," because wine is always fun.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070989)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:43 AM
Author: overrated degenerate feces

but do you check cornflakes or other

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070999)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:48 AM
Author: Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth

Duly edited.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071014)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:23 AM
Author: Racy school cafeteria

you don't want to be another fish or d do you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071114)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 10:14 AM
Author: Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth

Wasn't trying to be. I was pretty sure from the way the test was set up that eating alone was both an option and one that might be encouraged.

Besides, Dr. Science is unlikely to be around today, and pensive would have just fucked everything up.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071442)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:46 AM
Author: pungent chapel

*Your waiter stops in to collect the postcard, then returns with wine and a salad. He asks if you will be dining with anyone tonight, to which you respond in the negative. You spend a pleasant evening sitting in your chair, sipping your glass of wine in an utterly bland, Rowanian manner as you pick at your salad and gaze at the globes, candlelight dancing off of them and reflecting around the room. Eventually you pass out, enraptured by the stunning view. The waiter returns and clears the table while you sleep, leaving only the two candles.

A loud click wrests you out of your slumber, and you are immediately stricken with terror by the pitch black room you awaken to. Being true to yourself, you remain seated and think things through. You realize that the candles must have burned out while you slept, and that the click was probably the door unlocking. You surmise that if you can make it to the door, you just might come out alive.

You get up slowly and carefully, keeping in close contact with the table as you make your way around it. Soon you reach the other chair and use it as a guide to orient yourself. You know that if you can walk in a straight path from the chair to the door, survival is possible. You take those first, frightening steps away from the safety of the table, terrified of what might happen with the slightest error. The tension mounts as you continue your descent into the known unknown.

As you reach the area where the safe circle narrows into the door path, you begin to feel ever so slightly lightheaded, impaired by the wine. Your foot imperceptibly grazes the blue corner tile, you hear a spring and a loud pop, and your right cheek is wracked by intense pain. You clutch at your bleeding cheek, then make an attempt to wipe away the metal shrapnel and shards of glass. You try to reorient and keep going but you overcorrect, this time triggering the globes on the other side. The metal and glass shreds your skin as you stumble wildly around the room, eventually collapsing into a lump of flayed flesh while you claw at your mutilated eyes. You make one last desperate attempt to crawl through the shrapnel and save yourself, but you become tangled in the twine the globes had been suspended by, triggering even more of them. You struggle to raise your head one last time and are blasted directly in the face by the final globe. Most of the debris embeds in your forehead, large target that it is, and you die.*

Rowan, you were correct to spend the evening alone. Each of these men would have brought about your demise. Two were fellow students with simple instructions: "Be yourself." The others committed unspeakable atrocities on their loved ones. However, you failed to rationally consider the benefits and drawbacks of your other choices, dooming yourself. You never considered the ramifications of being in a dangerous candlelit room, instead leaving the matches on the table to be taken with your meal. You never recognized the consequences alcohol might have in your precarious situation. Instead, you ignored my warnings, bringing about your gruesome yet very avoidable death. Game over.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071152)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:48 AM
Author: Racy school cafeteria

this was dumb; you might want to edit before anyone else reads it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071157)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:56 AM
Author: Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike

stfu

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071164)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 4:55 AM
Author: Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike

fuck yeah

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071163)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:06 AM
Author: pungent chapel

The other dates:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Willis

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1221077/Katie-Piper-Acid-attack-victim-bravely-shows-face-disfigured-boyfriend-Daniel-Lynch.html

http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/topten/fugitives/fisher.htm

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071181)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:13 AM
Author: federal trust fund newt

nice

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071189)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:15 AM
Author: Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike

damnit i wish she picked the acid guy. what a stupid bitch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071193)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:13 AM
Author: federal trust fund newt

decent, and it fits Rowan

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071188)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 9:21 AM
Author: indigo cruel-hearted location

180 I'm loving all of these

ROWAN PICK A GHOST MONIKER NOW TYIA

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071354)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 10:15 AM
Author: Pea-brained Ruby Affirmative Action Ticket Booth

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071444)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:44 AM
Author: Zombie-like regret stain

LOL, these are fantastic.

* eagerly waits

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071004)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:38 AM
Author: contagious insecure useless brakes

http://upit.section31.us/uploads/jackson4.gif

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070979)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:39 AM
Author: federal trust fund newt

there it is

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13070984)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:01 AM
Author: thriller blathering home

lol pensive has herpes.

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071167)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 5:04 AM
Author: Racy school cafeteria

yea that part was great

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071176)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 10:15 AM
Author: maize international law enforcement agency menage

who is the first guy?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13071445)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:35 PM
Author: henna resort philosopher-king

this one was pretty bad

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13073253)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 24th, 2009 3:36 PM
Author: Medicated Trailer Park Preventive Strike

who the fuck r u to judge? go fuck ur dad in his hairy, tight butthole

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#13073258)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 10th, 2012 2:47 PM
Author: pontificating address



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1118704&forum_id=2#19755173)