Date: December 2nd, 2009 1:36 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
but my trans-galactic communication device is damaged. need help signaling my homeworld. had to post on this board so as to avoid interview with local news network.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 2:21 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
I dispise its unoriginality. That's why I lurk XO when not on duty. My planet is not about the 'fuck bitches/get money' mentality. We pride ourselves on subtlety and creativity. on my planet, people who do something similar to "poasting" are considered celebrities.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 2:25 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
his abstinance only education plan was perhaps the wisest decision of any modern leader. it is too bad that the males of your society are so beta that they could not enforce said policy. on my planet teens do not become pregnant for fear of death
Date: December 2nd, 2009 2:29 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
who says Earth is BPM? widely credited throughout the galaxy as TTT. you should see the 180 planets. planets where they invented a drug combo of crack and heroin with no side effects, or where machines really have enslaved man.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 2:40 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
yeah I originally got into an alpha school. but one semester I transfered to an all opposite gender school on an exchange, and flamed all the girls there online because I wasn't getting any. I got expelled and had to transfer.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 2:55 AM Author: Frisky range codepig
None of this happened. You monitored someone else doing it and you aspired to such greatness. The truth of the matter is much more simple, and sad.
Your passage into this world was unremarkable, being observed by a slightly stoned physician and your mother, her martian labia drooling with spend. You showed very little promise from an early age. When other children were monitoring household pets you were perplexed by the simpliest of houseplants. Your father took to the drink with shame, ruining the family. Your mother could not see the truth through her pride.
And so you ambled aimlessly through life, monitoring the odd vegetable here or the errant armoire there. Your marks in school were average. You attempted interchanges with the fairer aspect of your species, but your inadequacy as a monitor weighed against you. One particularly charitable female offered you the opportunity to run a level 3 diagnostic on her protuberances and walked away in disgust when you could barely muster an auxiliary scan.
And so you were shamed. An outcast even among the mediocre. Seeking redemption, you took the Long Satelite Admission Test. Not surprising, your score was unremarkable. You were admitted to what you referred as a "regional powerhouse." No one objected since your "region" was a Class 4 Waste Dump. You graduated slightly below the median and passed the Ballistic Academy Run on your third attempt. After sleepless nights and countless applications, you obtained your position here.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 3:03 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
thanks. my inadequacy actually stemmed from an incident at a young age wherein my father accidentally put some LSD in my coke. that's where my fascination with minitoring vegetables began. I was going to go into agriculture but, the unions these days. it is actually much harder than it looks trying to make sense of human occurances and report back. try explaining Miley Cyrus to my superiors, heh.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 3:05 AM Author: Frisky range codepig
You have to play the politics man. I'd send back shots of some zebra douching around the desert and keep compromising information of world leaders for extortion on reserve.
Date: December 2nd, 2009 3:18 AM Author: dark french chef ladyboy
just wait til I find a way to export nicotine to my homeworld. in all my studies it has eluded me as to the nature of its prevalancy. I have come to the conclusion that the importance of the whys is approaching zero. what remains is that it works. they won't know why they're doing it but they will all be doing it. then I will retire to Zebulon 9 and start my own hatchery like I always dreamed.