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THE BETAMORPHOSIS.

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&foru...
titillating crackhouse
  01/30/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  02/11/12
...
balding histrionic alpha
  02/11/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  02/14/12
dude, give TBF credit when it's due and link to the original...
Ruddy Potus Persian
  02/14/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  03/02/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  03/08/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  07/18/12
A Chung Tale
Flushed set jewess
  07/18/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  07/19/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  07/28/12
you love dem tbf posts huh
blathering preventive strike half-breed
  07/28/12
lol, just lol.
translucent skinny woman
  07/28/12
WE NEEDC TO KILL ALL NIGGERS
Exciting bipolar boiling water
  07/28/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  08/09/12
...
Electric Startling Lodge Blood Rage
  08/09/12
credited
Ruddy Potus Persian
  08/09/12
...
mahogany lettuce center
  12/03/14
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  12/30/15
Legendary
mahogany lettuce center
  08/09/12
At least provide the link to the original
Ruddy Potus Persian
  08/09/12
done
titillating crackhouse
  08/17/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  08/23/12
I was actually thinking about this yesterday
Rusted boyish community account
  08/23/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  09/13/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  10/30/12
...
Ruddy Potus Persian
  10/30/12
...
titillating crackhouse
  12/15/12
2013 bump
titillating crackhouse
  01/07/13
...
titillating crackhouse
  01/22/13
...
Contagious seedy mediation
  06/13/13
...
translucent skinny woman
  06/13/13
TBF's glory
mahogany lettuce center
  10/11/13
...
titillating crackhouse
  12/18/14
...
Slate pungent stage filthpig
  07/28/16
...
titillating crackhouse
  07/27/17
...
Exhilarant vermilion area queen of the night
  08/13/17
...
Blue Candlestick Maker Mother
  08/13/17
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  08/13/17
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  10/25/17
now i remember. yeah, it used to be that good here.
supple dog poop
  10/25/17
turns out calling asians bugs was a proud, long, rich tradit...
supple dog poop
  10/25/17
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  10/27/17
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  11/26/17
Claire was a scholar
Elite glittery becky pozpig
  11/26/17
...
bisexual coral knife
  01/23/18
...
mahogany lettuce center
  09/11/19
...
mahogany lettuce center
  01/28/25
...
Elite glittery becky pozpig
  05/20/25
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  01/23/18
...
Indecent know-it-all azn plaza
  01/23/18
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  06/16/18
...
mahogany lettuce center
  10/07/18
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  10/19/18
...
Crystalline death wish
  10/21/18
...
coiffed mood fortuitous meteor
  11/24/18
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  04/28/19
...
very tactful jap
  09/13/20
...
Mind-boggling pink library goyim
  11/06/20
...
very tactful jap
  11/06/20
...
very tactful jap
  11/29/20
...
very tactful jap
  12/16/20
...
Vivacious Dingle Berry
  03/02/21
...
very tactful jap
  10/14/21
...
razzle orchestra pit codepig
  07/13/23
...
Crystalline death wish
  07/13/23
more proof that tbf is an asian male
Concupiscible Orchid Church Building
  07/13/23
...
mahogany lettuce center
  07/13/23
...
razzle orchestra pit codepig
  10/05/24
...
laughsome mexican school
  10/05/24
...
razzle orchestra pit codepig
  01/28/25
...
Honey-headed stimulating school cafeteria messiness
  05/05/25
...
Honey-headed stimulating school cafeteria messiness
  05/20/25


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: January 30th, 2012 4:50 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM

Author: To be fair (Semi-Retired)

To be fair,

PART I:

One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.

"What's happened to me," he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before - when Samsa was still a successful ibanker - hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.

"Oh God," he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it; he did not know what to make of them.

He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. "Good God!" he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?

As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. "Teddy Chu-yu Huang," a sing-song voice called out, "Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, "Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni." Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquisitely bound feet.

As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. "Te-ddy...Te-ddy!," he called out, "Ni shenti hao ma?" And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - "CHU-YU!" Gregor directed an answer as best he could: "I go baba, xiexie." He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but rather congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night.

***

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19865895)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2012 1:08 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19942908)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 11th, 2012 1:33 PM
Author: balding histrionic alpha



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19942985)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 14th, 2012 4:19 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19963598)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 14th, 2012 4:20 PM
Author: Ruddy Potus Persian

dude, give TBF credit when it's due and link to the original

but a top 5 post of all time

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#19963602)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2012 5:01 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#20107232)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 8th, 2012 1:03 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#20156701)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 18th, 2012 3:18 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21116212)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 18th, 2012 3:22 PM
Author: Flushed set jewess

A Chung Tale

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21116242)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2012 2:27 AM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21121465)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:58 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201599)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:58 PM
Author: blathering preventive strike half-breed

you love dem tbf posts huh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201601)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 9:59 PM
Author: translucent skinny woman

lol, just lol.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201608)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2012 10:00 PM
Author: Exciting bipolar boiling water

WE NEEDC TO KILL ALL NIGGERS

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21201612)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:23 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296217)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:24 PM
Author: Electric Startling Lodge Blood Rage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296225)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:25 PM
Author: Ruddy Potus Persian

credited

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296229)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 3rd, 2014 8:06 PM
Author: mahogany lettuce center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#26851409)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:26 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#29481999)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:26 PM
Author: mahogany lettuce center

Legendary

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296241)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 9th, 2012 12:26 PM
Author: Ruddy Potus Persian

At least provide the link to the original

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21296249)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 17th, 2012 2:30 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse

done

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21360821)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2012 1:50 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21403977)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 23rd, 2012 2:01 PM
Author: Rusted boyish community account

I was actually thinking about this yesterday

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21404036)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 13th, 2012 5:12 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21571558)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 30th, 2012 3:21 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21924655)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 30th, 2012 4:02 PM
Author: Ruddy Potus Persian



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#21925080)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 15th, 2012 4:03 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22256092)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 7th, 2013 2:31 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse

2013 bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22385066)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 22nd, 2013 5:27 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#22483481)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 13th, 2013 2:43 PM
Author: Contagious seedy mediation



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#23388085)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 13th, 2013 3:23 PM
Author: translucent skinny woman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#23388309)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 11th, 2013 8:14 PM
Author: mahogany lettuce center

TBF's glory

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#24215654)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 18th, 2014 4:27 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#26957385)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2016 6:11 PM
Author: Slate pungent stage filthpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#31053610)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 27th, 2017 2:19 PM
Author: titillating crackhouse



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33867558)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 3:28 AM
Author: Exhilarant vermilion area queen of the night



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976384)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 3:33 AM
Author: Blue Candlestick Maker Mother



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976395)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 13th, 2017 4:13 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#33976464)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 2:59 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523544)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 3:10 AM
Author: supple dog poop

now i remember. yeah, it used to be that good here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523558)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 25th, 2017 3:11 AM
Author: supple dog poop

turns out calling asians bugs was a proud, long, rich tradition on xo going back a long ways. that gives me tickles.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34523559)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2017 1:39 PM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34542580)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 26th, 2017 12:14 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34772753)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 26th, 2017 1:00 AM
Author: Elite glittery becky pozpig

Claire was a scholar

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#34772952)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:06 AM
Author: bisexual coral knife



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216572)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 11th, 2019 10:26 AM
Author: mahogany lettuce center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#38817589)



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Date: January 28th, 2025 6:09 AM
Author: mahogany lettuce center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48597167)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 20th, 2025 9:37 AM
Author: Elite glittery becky pozpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48946725)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:05 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216559)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 23rd, 2018 10:11 AM
Author: Indecent know-it-all azn plaza



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#35216597)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 16th, 2018 9:42 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#36255593)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2018 1:23 PM
Author: mahogany lettuce center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#36979191)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 19th, 2018 8:39 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37055152)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 21st, 2018 6:31 PM
Author: Crystalline death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37068231)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 24th, 2018 5:53 AM
Author: coiffed mood fortuitous meteor



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#37291125)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2019 7:58 PM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#38156666)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 13th, 2020 2:09 AM
Author: very tactful jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#40911749)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 6th, 2020 12:21 AM
Author: Mind-boggling pink library goyim



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#41295001)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 6th, 2020 12:46 AM
Author: very tactful jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#41295234)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 29th, 2020 10:31 PM
Author: very tactful jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#41458867)



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Date: December 16th, 2020 1:31 AM
Author: very tactful jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#41557739)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 2nd, 2021 1:13 AM
Author: Vivacious Dingle Berry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#42032903)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 14th, 2021 10:38 PM
Author: very tactful jap



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#43273915)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2023 1:37 AM
Author: razzle orchestra pit codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#46542023)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2023 1:39 AM
Author: Crystalline death wish



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#46542036)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2023 1:41 AM
Author: Concupiscible Orchid Church Building

more proof that tbf is an asian male

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#46542043)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 13th, 2023 7:10 AM
Author: mahogany lettuce center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#46542250)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 5th, 2024 7:15 AM
Author: razzle orchestra pit codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48165642)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 5th, 2024 7:29 AM
Author: laughsome mexican school



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48165660)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 28th, 2025 2:29 AM
Author: razzle orchestra pit codepig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48597068)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 5th, 2025 9:32 AM
Author: Honey-headed stimulating school cafeteria messiness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48904722)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 20th, 2025 7:01 AM
Author: Honey-headed stimulating school cafeteria messiness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1861557&forum_id=2#48946559)