typical day in the life of a corporate lawyer
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Poast new message in this thread
Date: June 29th, 2006 8:33 PM Author: exhilarant ticket booth feces
well?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6106574) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 3:04 PM Author: mint cerebral becky cuckold
"I could be doing that, but then I'd also have a $1000 a day coke and hooker habit and beat my wife and kids in the Hamptons on the weekends that I see them. This way, I only punish my liver, and what good is a liver if you don't abuse it?"
Tucker Max, in reference to being a corporate lawyer.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118224) |
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Date: June 30th, 2006 3:21 PM Author: Curious Abusive Lodge Codepig
vault.com ---> industries ---> law
They have day-in-the-life things.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6112338) |
Date: June 29th, 2006 8:45 PM Author: bipolar institution love of her life
10 a.m. wake up to the gentle sound of money rustling.
10:30 be served breakfast in bed by french maid
11:00 be taken by limo to office
11:15 start working
11:45 leave for lunch with client. Take easurely stroll to restaurant.
12:15 arrive at restaurant. Eat steak with client. Drink wine.
2:15 pm Leave restaurant. Take easurely stroll to office.
2:45 Arrive at office. Start working.
3:30 Time for a coffee break.
3:50 Return to your desk. Start working
4:00 Go to CLE seminar. They serve good food.
5:00 Return to desk. No more work, but stay for face time,
5:30 take limo to your private club. Relax with friends.
7:30 meet date for dinner.
9:30 Go dancing.
11:30 Return home, make passionate love
11:32 Fall asleep to the sound of interest accruing.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6106646) |
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Date: June 30th, 2006 3:20 PM Author: beta boyish church
4 a.m. Wake up to the sound of alarm clock ringing, hit snooze button.
4:15 a.m. Wake up to sound of alarm clock ringing again, drag ass out of bed and into shower.
4:45 a.m. Arrive at office, having picked up McDonald's breakfast on the way.
5:00 a.m. Start working.
12:00 p.m. Order lunch for delivery. Eat at desk.
7:00 p.m. Order dinner for delivery. Eat at desk.
8:00 p.m. Check bank balance online. Notice it is very large. Wish for time to spend it.
10:00 p.m. Go home. Wack off with aid of internet porn.
11:00 p.m. Cry self to sleep.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6112331) |
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Date: June 30th, 2006 3:49 PM Author: beta boyish church
http://msnbc.msn.com/id/5437151/
Oak Brook, Illinois-based McDonald's, which since 2003 has curbed expansion to improve operations and build traffic at existing stores, now has about 80 percent of its 13,000 U.S. restaurants on some form of extended hours, a spokesman said. At least 12 percent operate around the clock.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6112600) |
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Date: June 30th, 2006 3:58 PM Author: arousing stock car mad cow disease
here is joke (imagine it flying)
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here is your head
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6112706) |
Date: July 1st, 2006 2:55 PM Author: mint cerebral becky cuckold
9:00 am - I just got into the office. The investment bankers will be here any minute to bully us around with this billion-dollar acquisition they're advising on. I start putting on my kneepads.
10:00 am - The bankers roll in, late as usual, joking about how they make twice as much as us. I get on my knees and start sucking.
10:50 am - Finally, some directors from this prestigious buyout fund show up for the drafting session. One of them tells me to grab him some coffee.
10:54 am - As I'm handing him his mug of coffee, I just barely touch his hand. I almost climax.
11:00 am to 10:45 pm - I suck more people's dicks. Finally, I can go home.
11:05 pm - I'm about to sneak out of the office, when a senior partner leaves me a voicemail telling me that there's a whole bunch of shit to do. I was told during law school that biglawyers work a little less than junior investment bankers, but I guess I was lied to; I'll have to spend the night in the office. Again.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118201) |
Date: July 1st, 2006 3:56 PM Author: Motley hideous property immigrant
My days vary a lot. But as a basic template:
9:30 Come in, read newspaper.
10am-6pm Talk on phone with people about issues in documents. Eat lunch at desk.
6pm-7:30pm Revise drafts of those documents.
7:30pm-8pm Dinner
8pm-? Revise drafts of those documents.
That's what I do -- negotiate documents, and draft them.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118439) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 4:01 PM Author: Motley hideous property immigrant
?
I normally negotiate with people about documents. Not with documents.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118460) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 4:05 PM Author: Motley hideous property immigrant
What do you mean? If you mean that I'm not particularly trained in negotiation, I'd concede that. If you mean I don't negotiate, I would disagree. I'm not the one negotiating price or major deal terms, but the junior associates pretty regularly negotiate confidentiality agreements, agreements with various agents (i-bank engagement letters, exchange agent agreements, proxy solicitor engagements), language in securities filings, reps in merger agreements, disclosure schedules, etc.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118481) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 4:10 PM Author: exciting legend
11:20 get up
11:25 smoke weed
12-2 class
2:20 smoke
3 dr phil
4:30 PTI
5 smoke
3am sleep
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118498) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 4:14 PM Author: Big space friendly grandma
How do you know when you have the ability to "negotiate" a particular term, and when that term should be passed to someone higher up? If the negotiate to reach an agreed upon understanding, generally, or are you really getting something more for your side?
Thanks for continuing to contribute even with so many jackasses here.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118510) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 4:19 PM Author: Motley hideous property immigrant
Depends. To some extent you just have a feel for what people care about. Or you'll negotiate your first ____ agreement/rep/whatever and ask the partner for advice, and by your second or third you'll know what to do on your own. In general, the more something restricts your client, creates liability, or allows the other side to do dangerous things, the less you can do on your own.
In general you negotiate to achieve more for your side, though it depends a bit. But there are a whole lot of provisions in any large contract that the principals don't have an "understanding" about -- no CEO has a clear, well-founded opinion on what his absence-of-changes rep should say -- but that are nonetheless important.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118534) |
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Date: July 1st, 2006 5:02 PM Author: Big space friendly grandma
So it sounds like you quickly move from having no experience to someone with responsibility for at least pieces of the deal. It sounds like a job for someone who likes chatting it up on the phone.
Anyone call you a "f--king monkey scribe" yet?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6118716) |
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Date: July 2nd, 2006 1:31 PM Author: Motley hideous property immigrant
Yes. I (and most of my classmates) became responsible for parts of deals very quickly. There are deals where I'm the only associate and entirely responsible for things like confidentiality agreements, reps and warranties, disclosure schedules, proxy statement, etc. Partners will occasionally take a quick look. And I talk on the phone a lot.
No one has called me a fucking monkey scribe.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6122946) |
Date: July 1st, 2006 7:14 PM Author: flatulent chestnut school cafeteria
The 7 Habits of Highly Useless Corporate Lawyers.
"Ernie from Glen Burnie", not his real name, is an unreliable but wise childhood friend of mine who likes the works of Hunter Thompson. EFGB is now a partner at a Washington, DC law firm. For years he has claimed that the following--by an unknown and long-dead lawyer, and dated 1836--was discovered during the 1980s in the ruins of an old Episcopal church in a northern Virginia town near our native DC. I would believe EFGB--except that I doubt that the word "weenie" was much in style in the antebellum American south:
1. Be risk-averse at all times. Clients have come to expect this from their lawyers. It's tradition. Honor it.
2. Tell the client only what it can't do. Business clients are run by business people who take risks. They need to be managed, guided, stopped. Don't encourage them.
3. Whatever you do, don't take a stand, and don't make a recommendation. (You don't want to be wrong, do you?)
4. Treat the client as a potential adversary at all times. Keep a distance.
5. Cover yourself. Write a lot to the client. Craft lots of confirming letters which use clauses like "it is our understanding", "our analysis is limited to..." and "we do not express an opinion as to whether..."
6. Churn up extra fees with extra letters and memoranda and tasks. Milk the engagement. (If you are going to be a weenie anyway, you might as well be a sneaky weenie.)
7. As out-house counsel, you are American royalty. Never forget that.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#6119288) |
Date: January 12th, 2008 12:12 PM Author: 180 irate associate
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=444939&forum_id=2#9151348) |
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