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THE BETAMORPHOSIS.

To be fair, PART I: One morning, as Gregor Samsa was w...
Startling crimson senate faggotry
  06/28/09
Rofl!
chartreuse toaster casino
  06/28/09
tyft
avocado aromatic range
  06/28/09
Good effort, but a resemblance to Pudsmack's early output ma...
Sienna big weed whacker
  06/28/09
naw man this was a solid 180, i loled pretty hard
aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner
  06/28/09
172. I will bump if I remember though. More stuff like this ...
Sienna big weed whacker
  06/29/09
180 mOAR
canary point
  06/29/09
MOAR
sinister stage
  06/29/09
190
Green bisexual laser beams brunch
  06/29/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  06/29/09
get a life faggot!
concupiscible field
  06/29/09
This is serial killer talk.
Passionate Bat-shit-crazy Principal's Office Police Squad
  06/29/09
Smirnoff eh
shivering parlor selfie
  06/29/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  06/29/09
...
Startling crimson senate faggotry
  06/29/09
go on
Garnet soul-stirring bawdyhouse hairy legs
  06/29/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  06/29/09
...
canary point
  07/02/09
...
aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner
  07/03/09
...
canary point
  07/03/09
good use of chinese. should be gregor sam though, to sound m...
Disrespectful turquoise quadroon native
  07/03/09
To be fair, ty
Startling crimson senate faggotry
  07/03/09
...
canary point
  07/05/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  07/06/09
...
canary point
  07/07/09
...
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  07/08/09
Holy shit how did I miss this?
Brilliant stirring nowag
  07/19/09
Oh so incredibly clever!
shimmering station multi-billionaire
  07/19/09
120, don't ruin this thread like a bitter faggot just becaus...
Brilliant stirring nowag
  07/19/09
It's stupid. Like you.
shimmering station multi-billionaire
  07/19/09
You forgot to say "Hi TBF!" Link to a better th...
Brilliant stirring nowag
  07/19/09
...
yellow people who are hurt
  07/19/09
Lame.
vigorous home elastic band
  07/19/09
you're lame
Maize friendly grandma
  08/21/09
Bump for Ted Never forget
aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner
  07/28/09
a gem
beady-eyed knife crackhouse
  07/28/09
To me, this is one of those threads that should be bumped on...
aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner
  07/28/09
...
razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car
  07/28/09
180
Maniacal Striped Hyena
  07/28/09
bump for bartards.
soggy crotch parlour
  07/29/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  08/03/09
...
Green bisexual laser beams brunch
  08/03/09
A certified classic
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  08/04/09
...
contagious ape
  08/04/09
good stuff
Fragrant Athletic Conference
  08/04/09
...
Sienna big weed whacker
  08/08/09
...
canary point
  08/14/09
...
canary point
  09/18/09
People often posted "underrated" in regards to a t...
Maniacal Striped Hyena
  09/18/09
...
canary point
  09/19/09
i was thinking about bumping this last night
Sienna big weed whacker
  09/19/09
180
Tripping grizzly library persian
  09/19/09
...
Green bisexual laser beams brunch
  09/20/09
...
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  10/02/09
180
Supple really tough guy
  10/02/09
...
Maize friendly grandma
  10/03/09
...
canary point
  10/13/09
Excellent bump
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  10/13/09
Bump
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  10/20/09
...
canary point
  10/27/09
lol
Dashing shaky lay
  10/27/09
good bump ty RIP Ted
Brilliant stirring nowag
  10/27/09
he's still with us.
Glittery Institution
  11/24/09
...
canary point
  10/31/09
...
canary point
  11/15/09
Holy shit, hadn't seen this before. Frightening.
Buck-toothed boyish set
  11/15/09
...
canary point
  11/24/09
bump for English
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  11/29/09
...
Glittery Institution
  11/29/09
it's time again
cobalt sickened masturbator business firm
  12/04/09
...
Bright galvanic market dog poop
  12/06/09
...
Brilliant stirring nowag
  12/06/09
...
canary point
  12/12/09
this thread hasn't gotten the attention it deserved
Maize friendly grandma
  12/12/09
agreed, especially given its authenticity in the proper use ...
Seedy heady space
  12/12/09
180
Very Tactful Emerald Telephone
  12/12/09
bump for dipshit aspie noobs who think tbf doesn't post anyt...
Irradiated Theater Digit Ratio
  12/20/09
...
canary point
  12/28/09
SIX MONTH ANNIVERSARY BUMP
talented demanding volcanic crater church building
  12/28/09
DECADE BUMP
canary point
  01/01/10
bump
Maize friendly grandma
  01/06/10
This was scary. 180.
swollen apoplectic useless brakes orchestra pit
  01/06/10
180
territorial transparent stain main people
  01/06/10
A true 180
Supple really tough guy
  01/06/10
bump
Brilliant stirring nowag
  01/21/10
...
canary point
  02/05/10
...
Stimulating rusted stag film prole
  02/19/10
Bump for return of search
talented demanding volcanic crater church building
  02/22/10
...
canary point
  03/31/10
...
Maize friendly grandma
  03/31/10
...
Racy coiffed newt
  04/09/10
...
razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car
  04/09/10
...
Cerebral chrome den
  04/17/10
...
razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car
  04/30/10
...
Maize friendly grandma
  04/30/10
...
Excitant awkward pisswyrm national
  05/11/10
...
canary point
  05/17/10
Holy FUCK.
Maniacal Striped Hyena
  05/17/10
...
marvelous fortuitous meteor
  06/07/10
One of the all time greats
appetizing pozpig corner
  06/07/10
since TBF is bumping all of his shit today
provocative ticket booth
  07/03/10
...
adventurous rose gay wizard
  07/17/10
Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM Author: To be fair To be ...
canary point
  07/17/10
...
canary point
  07/17/10
...
canary point
  08/06/10
...
Violent lodge french chef
  09/06/10
...
Maize friendly grandma
  10/16/10
...
canary point
  10/17/10
...
canary point
  12/19/10
Holy shit!
Titillating Autistic Piazza
  12/19/10
...
canary point
  12/30/10
180 Where is part deux?
Umber abode boistinker
  12/30/10
...
canary point
  01/27/11
180 bump
Racy coiffed newt
  02/23/11
...
canary point
  05/07/11
u mad fgt
bronze laughsome location gaming laptop
  05/07/11
...
Maize friendly grandma
  05/07/11
...
canary point
  06/20/11
...
canary point
  07/16/11
...
Claret center
  10/07/11
...
burgundy thirsty pit cuck
  10/21/11
...
canary point
  10/27/11
2012 BUMP
canary point
  01/01/12


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM
Author: Startling crimson senate faggotry

To be fair,

PART I:

One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.

"What's happened to me," he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before - when Samsa was still a successful ibanker - hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.

"Oh God," he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it; he did not know what to make of them.

He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. "Good God!" he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?

As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. "Teddy Chu-yu Huang," a sing-song voice called out, "Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, "Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni." Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquisitely bound feet.

As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. "Te-ddy...Te-ddy!," he called out, "Ni shenti hao ma?" And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - "CHU-YU!" Gregor directed an answer as best he could: "I go baba, xiexie." He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but rather congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night.

***

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111444)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:50 PM
Author: chartreuse toaster casino

Rofl!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111526)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:53 PM
Author: avocado aromatic range

tyft

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111559)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:57 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker

Good effort, but a resemblance to Pudsmack's early output marks against it I think.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111598)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:58 PM
Author: aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner

naw man this was a solid 180, i loled pretty hard

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111609)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 12:16 AM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker

172. I will bump if I remember though. More stuff like this needs to get rolling.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111800)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 12:02 AM
Author: canary point

180

mOAR

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111644)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 12:18 AM
Author: sinister stage

MOAR

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111832)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 12:53 AM
Author: Green bisexual laser beams brunch

190

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12112276)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 3:11 AM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12113288)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 3:13 AM
Author: concupiscible field

get a life faggot!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12113290)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 3:13 AM
Author: Passionate Bat-shit-crazy Principal's Office Police Squad

This is serial killer talk.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12113291)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 8:37 AM
Author: shivering parlor selfie

Smirnoff eh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12113401)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 12:17 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12114366)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 5:55 PM
Author: Startling crimson senate faggotry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12117160)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 6:15 PM
Author: Garnet soul-stirring bawdyhouse hairy legs

go on

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12117299)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 29th, 2009 8:32 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12118226)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 2nd, 2009 2:55 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12142269)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 3rd, 2009 2:46 PM
Author: aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12149990)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 3rd, 2009 4:21 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12150972)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 3rd, 2009 6:01 PM
Author: Disrespectful turquoise quadroon native

good use of chinese. should be gregor sam though, to sound more chinky

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12151754)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 3rd, 2009 6:03 PM
Author: Startling crimson senate faggotry

To be fair,

ty

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12151771)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 5th, 2009 3:55 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12162789)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 6th, 2009 2:06 AM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12168193)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 7th, 2009 6:43 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12181948)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 8th, 2009 5:21 PM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12190852)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:17 PM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag

Holy shit how did I miss this?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290616)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:17 PM
Author: shimmering station multi-billionaire

Oh so incredibly clever!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290619)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:20 PM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag

120, don't ruin this thread like a bitter faggot just because you hate the OP, thx

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290638)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:22 PM
Author: shimmering station multi-billionaire

It's stupid. Like you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290656)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:23 PM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag

You forgot to say "Hi TBF!"

Link to a better thread you've made? Also, burn in a housefire, etc.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290667)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:18 PM
Author: yellow people who are hurt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290629)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 19th, 2009 9:23 PM
Author: vigorous home elastic band

Lame.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12290669)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 21st, 2009 6:42 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma

you're lame

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12561524)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2009 5:07 PM
Author: aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner

Bump for Ted

Never forget

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369382)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2009 5:09 PM
Author: beady-eyed knife crackhouse

a gem

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369389)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2009 5:09 PM
Author: aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner

To me, this is one of those threads that should be bumped once or twice a month forever.

This board must never forget.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369397)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2009 5:38 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369579)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 28th, 2009 5:40 PM
Author: Maniacal Striped Hyena

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369595)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 29th, 2009 5:23 AM
Author: soggy crotch parlour

bump for bartards.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12374631)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 3rd, 2009 4:38 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12415939)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 3rd, 2009 4:45 PM
Author: Green bisexual laser beams brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12416030)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 4th, 2009 4:19 AM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm

A certified classic

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12421003)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 4th, 2009 4:26 AM
Author: contagious ape



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12421010)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 4th, 2009 7:10 PM
Author: Fragrant Athletic Conference

good stuff

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12425043)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 8th, 2009 7:13 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12456520)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 14th, 2009 4:45 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12504320)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 18th, 2009 7:16 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12780245)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 18th, 2009 7:18 PM
Author: Maniacal Striped Hyena

People often posted "underrated" in regards to a thread or post (sometimes within two minutes of its posting).

This, however, is perhaps the most deserving instance of "underrated."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12780265)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 19th, 2009 5:52 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12787350)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 19th, 2009 5:53 PM
Author: Sienna big weed whacker

i was thinking about bumping this last night

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12787353)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 19th, 2009 10:47 PM
Author: Tripping grizzly library persian

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12789205)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 20th, 2009 11:57 PM
Author: Green bisexual laser beams brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12797253)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 2nd, 2009 11:58 AM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12888931)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 2nd, 2009 12:03 PM
Author: Supple really tough guy

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12888980)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 3rd, 2009 3:56 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12898534)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 13th, 2009 11:32 AM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12977038)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 13th, 2009 11:33 AM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm

Excellent bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12977045)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 20th, 2009 1:52 AM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm

Bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13035043)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2009 11:54 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13106091)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2009 11:56 PM
Author: Dashing shaky lay

lol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13106122)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2009 11:57 PM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag

good bump ty

RIP Ted

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13106138)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 24th, 2009 4:55 PM
Author: Glittery Institution

he's still with us.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13358802)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 31st, 2009 12:54 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13137087)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 15th, 2009 8:04 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13274744)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 15th, 2009 8:15 PM
Author: Buck-toothed boyish set

Holy shit, hadn't seen this before. Frightening.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13274843)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 24th, 2009 4:50 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13358784)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 29th, 2009 1:02 AM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm

bump for English

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13392864)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 29th, 2009 1:15 AM
Author: Glittery Institution



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13393026)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 4th, 2009 11:35 PM
Author: cobalt sickened masturbator business firm

it's time again

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13449448)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 6th, 2009 2:12 AM
Author: Bright galvanic market dog poop



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13463243)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 6th, 2009 2:20 AM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13463317)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 12th, 2009 5:00 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13530818)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 12th, 2009 6:11 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma

this thread hasn't gotten the attention it deserved

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13531402)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 12th, 2009 6:25 PM
Author: Seedy heady space

agreed, especially given its authenticity in the proper use of chinese

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13531511)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 12th, 2009 6:23 PM
Author: Very Tactful Emerald Telephone

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13531503)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 20th, 2009 3:54 AM
Author: Irradiated Theater Digit Ratio

bump for dipshit aspie noobs who think tbf doesn't post anything cool

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13603201)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2009 1:36 AM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13663012)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 28th, 2009 3:56 PM
Author: talented demanding volcanic crater church building

SIX MONTH ANNIVERSARY BUMP

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13665845)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 1st, 2010 3:02 PM
Author: canary point

DECADE BUMP

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13695105)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 6th, 2010 3:36 AM
Author: Maize friendly grandma

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13734665)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 6th, 2010 4:25 AM
Author: swollen apoplectic useless brakes orchestra pit

This was scary. 180.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13734821)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 6th, 2010 4:47 AM
Author: territorial transparent stain main people

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13734889)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 6th, 2010 5:11 AM
Author: Supple really tough guy

A true 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13734910)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 21st, 2010 2:55 PM
Author: Brilliant stirring nowag

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#13870557)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 5th, 2010 12:45 AM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14020226)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 19th, 2010 9:56 PM
Author: Stimulating rusted stag film prole



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14175578)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 22nd, 2010 10:38 PM
Author: talented demanding volcanic crater church building

Bump for return of search

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14206008)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 31st, 2010 3:45 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14559420)



Reply Favorite

Date: March 31st, 2010 3:58 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14559506)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 9th, 2010 12:17 PM
Author: Racy coiffed newt



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14654413)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 9th, 2010 12:21 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14654456)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 17th, 2010 6:54 PM
Author: Cerebral chrome den



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14740396)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2010 10:16 PM
Author: razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14874272)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2010 10:27 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14874381)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 11th, 2010 12:24 AM
Author: Excitant awkward pisswyrm national



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#14960477)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 17th, 2010 7:36 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15015703)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 17th, 2010 7:41 PM
Author: Maniacal Striped Hyena

Holy FUCK.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15015725)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 7th, 2010 2:24 AM
Author: marvelous fortuitous meteor

...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15184494)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 7th, 2010 2:29 AM
Author: appetizing pozpig corner

One of the all time greats

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15184535)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 3rd, 2010 2:27 PM
Author: provocative ticket booth

since TBF is bumping all of his shit today

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15405413)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2010 11:38 AM
Author: adventurous rose gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15531186)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2010 11:47 AM
Author: canary point

Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM

Author: To be fair

To be fair,

PART I:

One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.

“What’s happened to me,” he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before —Samsa was a successful ibanker— hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.

“O God,” he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it — he did not know what to make of them.

He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. “Good God!” he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?

As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. “Teddy Chu-yu Huang,” a sing-song voice called out, “Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, “Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni.” Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquistely bound feet. As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already his he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. “Te-ddy...Te-ddy!,” he called out, “Ni shenti hao ma?” And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - “CHU-YU!” Gregor directed an answer as best he could: “I go baba, xiexie.” He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night, even at home.

***

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15531215)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 17th, 2010 3:46 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15532826)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 6th, 2010 2:55 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15720850)



Reply Favorite

Date: September 6th, 2010 1:08 AM
Author: Violent lodge french chef



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15975466)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 16th, 2010 4:56 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16309193)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 17th, 2010 6:27 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16317199)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 19th, 2010 1:31 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16851644)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 19th, 2010 1:35 PM
Author: Titillating Autistic Piazza

Holy shit!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16851658)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2010 1:23 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16930974)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2010 1:33 PM
Author: Umber abode boistinker

180

Where is part deux?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16931027)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 27th, 2011 6:11 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#17152199)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 23rd, 2011 7:03 PM
Author: Racy coiffed newt

180 bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#17355148)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 7th, 2011 5:00 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#17949147)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 7th, 2011 5:04 PM
Author: bronze laughsome location gaming laptop

u mad fgt

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#17949169)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 7th, 2011 5:05 PM
Author: Maize friendly grandma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#17949171)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 20th, 2011 11:31 AM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#18299150)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 16th, 2011 11:16 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#18526571)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 7th, 2011 9:19 PM
Author: Claret center



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#19123502)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 21st, 2011 8:20 PM
Author: burgundy thirsty pit cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#19217378)



Reply Favorite

Date: October 27th, 2011 6:57 PM
Author: canary point



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#19253624)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 1st, 2012 3:12 AM
Author: canary point

2012 BUMP

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#19681497)