THE BETAMORPHOSIS.
| Startling crimson senate faggotry | 06/28/09 | | chartreuse toaster casino | 06/28/09 | | avocado aromatic range | 06/28/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 06/28/09 | | aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner | 06/28/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 06/29/09 | | canary point | 06/29/09 | | sinister stage | 06/29/09 | | Green bisexual laser beams brunch | 06/29/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 06/29/09 | | concupiscible field | 06/29/09 | | Passionate Bat-shit-crazy Principal's Office Police Squad | 06/29/09 | | shivering parlor selfie | 06/29/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 06/29/09 | | Startling crimson senate faggotry | 06/29/09 | | Garnet soul-stirring bawdyhouse hairy legs | 06/29/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 06/29/09 | | canary point | 07/02/09 | | aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner | 07/03/09 | | canary point | 07/03/09 | | Disrespectful turquoise quadroon native | 07/03/09 | | Startling crimson senate faggotry | 07/03/09 | | canary point | 07/05/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 07/06/09 | | canary point | 07/07/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 07/08/09 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 07/19/09 | | shimmering station multi-billionaire | 07/19/09 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 07/19/09 | | shimmering station multi-billionaire | 07/19/09 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 07/19/09 | | yellow people who are hurt | 07/19/09 | | vigorous home elastic band | 07/19/09 | | Maize friendly grandma | 08/21/09 | | aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner | 07/28/09 | | beady-eyed knife crackhouse | 07/28/09 | | aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner | 07/28/09 | | razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car | 07/28/09 | | Maniacal Striped Hyena | 07/28/09 | | soggy crotch parlour | 07/29/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 08/03/09 | | Green bisexual laser beams brunch | 08/03/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 08/04/09 | | contagious ape | 08/04/09 | | Fragrant Athletic Conference | 08/04/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 08/08/09 | | canary point | 08/14/09 | | canary point | 09/18/09 | | Maniacal Striped Hyena | 09/18/09 | | canary point | 09/19/09 | | Sienna big weed whacker | 09/19/09 | | Tripping grizzly library persian | 09/19/09 | | Green bisexual laser beams brunch | 09/20/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 10/02/09 | | Supple really tough guy | 10/02/09 | | Maize friendly grandma | 10/03/09 | | canary point | 10/13/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 10/13/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 10/20/09 | | canary point | 10/27/09 | | Dashing shaky lay | 10/27/09 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 10/27/09 | | Glittery Institution | 11/24/09 | | canary point | 10/31/09 | | canary point | 11/15/09 | | Buck-toothed boyish set | 11/15/09 | | canary point | 11/24/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 11/29/09 | | Glittery Institution | 11/29/09 | | cobalt sickened masturbator business firm | 12/04/09 | | Bright galvanic market dog poop | 12/06/09 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 12/06/09 | | canary point | 12/12/09 | | Maize friendly grandma | 12/12/09 | | Seedy heady space | 12/12/09 | | Very Tactful Emerald Telephone | 12/12/09 | | Irradiated Theater Digit Ratio | 12/20/09 | | canary point | 12/28/09 | | talented demanding volcanic crater church building | 12/28/09 | | canary point | 01/01/10 | | Maize friendly grandma | 01/06/10 | | swollen apoplectic useless brakes orchestra pit | 01/06/10 | | territorial transparent stain main people | 01/06/10 | | Supple really tough guy | 01/06/10 | | Brilliant stirring nowag | 01/21/10 | | canary point | 02/05/10 | | Stimulating rusted stag film prole | 02/19/10 | | talented demanding volcanic crater church building | 02/22/10 | | canary point | 03/31/10 | | Maize friendly grandma | 03/31/10 | | Racy coiffed newt | 04/09/10 | | razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car | 04/09/10 | | Cerebral chrome den | 04/17/10 | | razzle-dazzle nighttime pervert stock car | 04/30/10 | | Maize friendly grandma | 04/30/10 | | Excitant awkward pisswyrm national | 05/11/10 | | canary point | 05/17/10 | | Maniacal Striped Hyena | 05/17/10 | | marvelous fortuitous meteor | 06/07/10 | | appetizing pozpig corner | 06/07/10 | | provocative ticket booth | 07/03/10 | | adventurous rose gay wizard | 07/17/10 | | canary point | 07/17/10 | | canary point | 07/17/10 | | canary point | 08/06/10 | | Violent lodge french chef | 09/06/10 | | Maize friendly grandma | 10/16/10 | | canary point | 10/17/10 | | canary point | 12/19/10 | | Titillating Autistic Piazza | 12/19/10 | | canary point | 12/30/10 | | Umber abode boistinker | 12/30/10 | | canary point | 01/27/11 | | Racy coiffed newt | 02/23/11 | | canary point | 05/07/11 | | bronze laughsome location gaming laptop | 05/07/11 | | Maize friendly grandma | 05/07/11 | | canary point | 06/20/11 | | canary point | 07/16/11 | | Claret center | 10/07/11 | | burgundy thirsty pit cuck | 10/21/11 | | canary point | 10/27/11 | | canary point | 01/01/12 |
Poast new message in this thread
Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM Author: Startling crimson senate faggotry
To be fair,
PART I:
One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.
"What's happened to me," he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before - when Samsa was still a successful ibanker - hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.
"Oh God," he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it; he did not know what to make of them.
He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. "Good God!" he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?
As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. "Teddy Chu-yu Huang," a sing-song voice called out, "Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, "Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni." Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquisitely bound feet.
As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. "Te-ddy...Te-ddy!," he called out, "Ni shenti hao ma?" And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - "CHU-YU!" Gregor directed an answer as best he could: "I go baba, xiexie." He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but rather congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night.
***
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111444) |
Date: June 29th, 2009 12:02 AM Author: canary point
180
mOAR
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12111644) |
Date: July 28th, 2009 5:07 PM Author: aphrodisiac meetinghouse gunner
Bump for Ted
Never forget
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12369382) |
Date: September 18th, 2009 7:18 PM Author: Maniacal Striped Hyena
People often posted "underrated" in regards to a thread or post (sometimes within two minutes of its posting).
This, however, is perhaps the most deserving instance of "underrated."
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#12780265) |
Date: July 17th, 2010 11:47 AM Author: canary point
Date: June 28th, 2009 11:43 PM
Author: To be fair
To be fair,
PART I:
One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been transformed into an Asian man. He lay on his dingy unwashed Hello Kitty sheets and saw, as he lifted his head up a little, his tiny, emaciated yellow figure stretched out before him. His frail hairless legs, pitifully thin even compared to the rest of his boyish body, splayed out comically before his tiny nearsighted sliteyes like a splintered bamboo chopstick.
“What’s happened to me,” he thought. It was no dream. His room lay quietly between the four well-known walls. And above the table, on which a wide assortment of empty Smirnoff bottles had stood just the night before —Samsa was a successful ibanker— hung the picture of a familiar woman. It was a gorgeous Russian girl with a fur hat and a fur boa. She sat erect there, lifting up in the direction of the viewer a solid fur muff into which her entire forearm had disappeared, just as he had often disappeared into her muff after a night of heavy boozing. Yet this picture of Svetlana was not his; for this had been poorly cut out of an old Sports Illustrated issue, and was perilously attached to the greasy wall with a potent mix of dried semen, duct tape and profound desperation. And in the place of his hard earned bottle battalion there now stood an curious assortment of thick, strange tomes bearing odd titles - "Criminal Procedure", "Administrative Law", "Secured Transactions" and "TROL Spring 2009" - alongside three gently humming computers, all myseriously logged on to the same website. He immediately knew that he would never have the beautiful woman in the picture again.
“O God,” he thought. At that moment he felt a slight itching beneath the shaggy black carpet that coated his oily scalp. He slowly pushed himself on his back closer to the bed post so that he could lift his unsightly bulbous head up on his narrow pencil neck more easily, and found the itchy part, which rained down small white flakes as he scratched it — he did not know what to make of them.
He looked over at the alarm clock ticking away by the chest of drawers. “Good God!” he thought. It was half past six, and the hands were going quietly on. It was even past the half hour, already nearly quarter to. What should he do? Did he dare to face the world like this?
As he was thinking all this over in the greatest haste, without being able to make the decision to get out of bed, there was a cautious knock on the basement door by the head of the bed. “Teddy Chu-yu Huang,” a sing-song voice called out, “Zao on, lice and shine now boy! You lazy boy!" Was it his mother...was he living at home again with his parents? Gregor was startled when he heard his voice answering. It was clearly and unmistakably his voice, but it was now markedly higher in pitch, marred by a grating Chinese accent which left the words grotesquely distorted so that one did not know if one had heard correctly. Gregor wanted to answer in detail and explain everything, but in these circumstances he confined himself to saying, “Xiexie mama. I get up, woi ai ni.” Apparently satisfied, his mother shuffled off slowly on her tiny, exquistely bound feet. As a result of that short conversation, however, his father also became aware that his son was still at home, and already his he was knocking on one side door, weakly but with his fist. “Te-ddy...Te-ddy!,” he called out, “Ni shenti hao ma?” And, after a short while, he called out again in a whinier voice - “CHU-YU!” Gregor directed an answer as best he could: “I go baba, xiexie.” He made an effort with the most careful articulation and inserted long pauses between the individual words. His father turned back to his breakfast. Gregor had no intention of opening the door, but congratulated himself on his precaution, acquired from years of sleeping around in his former life, of locking all doors during the night, even at home.
***
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#15531215) |
Date: December 30th, 2010 1:33 PM Author: Umber abode boistinker
180
Where is part deux?
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=1029548&forum_id=2#16931027) |
|
|