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Hilarious Penn Law student website/resume - Let's bash this TTT

Anyone here know this douche? http://www.deshif.com/
idiotic multi-colored headpube
  03/09/05
Wow... just wow. All that's missing is an LSAT score. # W...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
Now don't be jealous just because "message board addict...
Greedy nibblets garrison
  06/18/05
he evidently was formally congratulated for 'oustanding acad...
sable parlour macaca
  03/09/05
Hey, don't sell him short! He was also formally congratulate...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
That's the most TTT part of that whole travesty of a CV.
godawful impertinent space
  03/09/05
Have you considered that the resume people post on their per...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
go away, David
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
Dude the guy is in Cuba right now. See below.
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
but you also said you'll have internet access every day or t...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
PWN3D!!
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
Not really. Just because there is one civilized person on x...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
when i started HS i was a pretty big dork, and i got picked ...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
Actually from his schedule it looks like he's all booked. S...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
David, it's obviously you b/c no one else would be so persis...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
Dude the guy is in cuba on spring break. Give it a rest dic...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
Speaking of that, does he have treasury department clearance...
Hilarious black crotch indian lodge
  03/09/05
I like you
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
I love you.
Dashing Beta Nowag Abode
  03/24/05
who puts Mensa membership on a resume?!
vivacious blue site
  03/09/05
Same guys who list Westlaw certification.
idiotic multi-colored headpube
  03/09/05
Correct.
orchid provocative stag film pozpig
  03/09/05
He says he was "featured" in Newsday, and then lin...
ruddy slap-happy gaping hairy legs
  03/09/05
nice, not even a finalist.
Abnormal knife idea he suggested
  03/09/05
and the onion "feature" is a photograph with a bun...
comical pervert
  03/09/05
Oh my God. I didn't know that there was an actual place call...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
...
big offensive national
  03/09/05
this is only relevant if something actually pans out....so i...
hairraiser translucent water buffalo station
  03/09/05
i know, i thought it was just an expression until i stood at...
vibrant turdskin idiot
  03/10/05
http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/gazetteer?city=hicksville&...
Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo
  03/11/05
Hicksville is full of smelly Indians. And now the Broadway ...
citrine dilemma scourge upon the earth
  03/23/05
Check out the links in his recogintion section. Almost all o...
gay persian
  03/09/05
Hey, at least we know he was in the Onion. Only thing more p...
bespoke passionate boltzmann
  03/09/05
Let's not forget the prestige involved in working for Daddy ...
gay persian
  03/09/05
Hey, this guy may be dorkey but he came by it honestly. Did...
Olive jew
  03/11/05
Not to mention the fact that his appearance in the Onion fea...
khaki keepsake machete
  03/09/05
Was this all really true? I feel like it's some bizarre par...
chest-beating hall dysfunction
  04/05/05
This is why there are so many self hating jews.
Heady Area
  06/18/05
They actually used him for a photo shoot for the Onion when ...
Crystalline toilet seat
  03/09/05
LOL http://www.deshif.com/onion.htm
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
classic
massive theatre foreskin
  03/09/05
Someone should email this to everyone at upenn
Irradiated learning disabled goyim
  03/09/05
He's already pretty famous around here.
Fiercely-loyal Hissy Fit
  03/09/05
Do share.
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
From what I've witnessed, he's very active and outspoken. Bu...
Fiercely-loyal Hissy Fit
  03/09/05
Don't know him personally, but he caused quite a stir at the...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
http://www.dailypennsylvanian.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/0...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
LOL, good find.
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
I'm *sure* he takes advantage of the massages just because o...
Wonderful associate stead
  03/09/05
is that abnormal? Those professor things go for a ton at the...
cerebral private investor plaza
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
In case you ever want to get in touch with him, http://www.d...
bespoke passionate boltzmann
  03/09/05
someone should IM him.
ruddy slap-happy gaping hairy legs
  03/09/05
"Facilitated development of interpersonal and social sk...
Jade violent menage
  03/09/05
With such a schedule, how does he find time to bang all the ...
gay persian
  03/09/05
VIRGIN
Ocher Doobsian Regret Juggernaut
  03/09/05
You HAVE to read the Nikkei link. Who on earth would put a ...
nubile telephone windowlicker
  03/09/05
I wish Milk Chan was here. She could say this much better th...
gay persian
  03/09/05
Oh Christ, I didn't even notice that: A pink slipper Davi...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
The MSNBC article is also about losing his dot-com job when ...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
Holy Shit. Nice find.
Walnut stimulating casino boistinker
  01/17/06
With all of these lame hobbies, how does he find time for th...
Contagious athletic conference new version
  03/09/05
Oh, even the busiest person can find time for that. Um, I'v...
nubile telephone windowlicker
  03/09/05
Leboeuf is a good place to work. Seriously.
ruby insanely creepy patrolman
  03/09/05
Ha... I guess that goes to show how much personality matters...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
I was actually being serious, I thought the people there wer...
ruby insanely creepy patrolman
  03/09/05
Really? Very interesting.
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
Like I told you eariler, it's not just about vault rank. ...
ruby insanely creepy patrolman
  03/09/05
he's still a douche if he makes 450K. hth
Fragrant carnelian striped hyena
  03/09/05
[Oh, fine. Guilt edit.]
big offensive national
  03/09/05
Did you guys catch this one: Keyboards/cowbell/lute: Capt...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
i GOTTA have more cowbell!
exciting piazza hominid
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
He's on the masthead of the Penn Law Review...this is really...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
"Cancun Hot Body '03 & '04"" I don't b...
Diverse claret address yarmulke
  03/09/05
see the WHOIS i posted below his website was registered a...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
Yeah, unless he holds fat *exclusively* in his bean and nowh...
hairraiser translucent water buffalo station
  03/09/05
he wants his loved ones to know what flights he's on in case...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
how did he get direct HAV-MIA flights?
elite love of her life
  01/17/06
I actually know someone a lot like this in real life. These...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
Notice that this guy's resume is so douchey that no one is e...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
Oh, geez. Now I'm ashamed that I have something in common wi...
Fluffy Stock Car Locus
  03/11/05
mental note: don't try to get job with Leboeuf in the fall
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
Looks legit to me, here is the WHOIS on his domain: Doma...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
is anyone a Duke alum here? they could write and ask him fo...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
NicoBlue is. They might have been in the same graduating cla...
Bateful aquamarine round eye
  03/09/05
The funniest part is how he lists his upcoming summer associ...
Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency
  03/09/05
scratch that - look at his calendar - he has all these chees...
Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency
  03/09/05
I think listing the summer associate position is fine -- it'...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
But for something that reeks of prestige, that's not exactly...
soul-stirring halford useless brakes
  03/09/05
I think that someone called "HLSking" probably doe...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
This board is filled with many vicious people. Even "re...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
STFU
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
I hope you have a nice life being a dickhead.
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
it's been working pretty well for me so far. thanks.
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
HAHA, that was fucking beautiful
stubborn lilac electric furnace wagecucks
  01/17/06
I did feel a little bad about it, yeah. Oh well.
big offensive national
  03/09/05
Same here. Too late. And anyway, posting a web site like tha...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
Correct.
silver resort pistol
  03/09/05
Agreed. Not very nice.
pale excitant police squad
  03/10/05
...
Spectacular lettuce
  03/09/05
He might be mildly autistic.
nubile telephone windowlicker
  03/09/05
I don't think autistic people would stalk people though
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
This guy is a weirdo but its not his fault. You can't choos...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
Also, he is apparently a massive tool and faggot and all-aro...
Hilarious black crotch indian lodge
  03/09/05
No doubt he is. But its still incredibly vicious to savage ...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
look out the window, Davey. it's a cruel world.
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
I understand it may be difficult for a dickhead like you to ...
supple deranged church building faggotry
  03/09/05
Did you learn that during Westlaw certification?
Hilarious black crotch indian lodge
  03/09/05
Nah, he learned it at Mensa.
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
absurd defense of a tool - check excessively logical styl...
unholy mustard fortuitous meteor jewess
  03/09/05
...
elite love of her life
  01/17/06
also, he defends himself on anonymous internet message board...
Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
"I think this guy is lucky he's a genius..." Wa...
Fluffy Stock Car Locus
  03/11/05
Woah, that was him? The stalking rumor was circulating among...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
i doubt that there is a lurking xoxo reader that became so d...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
"he constantly raises his hand and has one of the worst...
orchid provocative stag film pozpig
  03/09/05
loser
Olive jew
  03/11/05
::passes out in shock::
Bat-shit-crazy sound barrier forum
  03/11/05
This kid sounds like the equivalent of a 1L at Vanderbilt wh...
motley frozen trump supporter spot
  03/24/05
Isn't 'Shifren' a Jewish name? Jewish mafia, do something...
Hilarious black crotch indian lodge
  03/09/05
Forget it, the Nikkei link alone is enough to excommunicate ...
nubile telephone windowlicker
  03/09/05
Uh, check out the Onion link. I think that is him in the sa...
Lake aphrodisiac hospital
  03/09/05
I'm surpised he didn't call it a "model shoot" on ...
violet puppy
  03/09/05
This Deshif guy has proven to me that not only does God have...
unholy mustard fortuitous meteor jewess
  03/09/05
What's the only part of his busy schedule he doesn't report ...
Deep fat ankles lodge
  03/09/05
I knew this guy at Duke - not well, but I took some classes ...
electric prole
  03/09/05
Do you know anything about him stalking girls?
bespoke passionate boltzmann
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
LMAO, that is an awesome story.
orchid provocative stag film pozpig
  03/09/05
I was there too... Unfortunately, what dickcheese posted was...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
what was the expression of the profs face?
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
She wasn't there, she just donated the item. Dunno what her ...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
am i the only one that thinks he'll show up and introduce hi...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
well played!
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
Edit: I'm starting to feel bad.
ungodly pit
  03/09/05
...
Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry
  03/09/05
I think he emceed my Bar Mitzvah.
nubile telephone windowlicker
  03/09/05
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!! Unbelievable, simply unbelievable... Fro...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
what does it take to graduate 'near' the top of your class a...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
I dunno about that, but it must be pretty damn hard to becom...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
his son is obviously a better web designer and goes to a muc...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
Eh, after seeing DeShif.com Penn doesn't feel very prestigio...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
...
Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry
  03/09/05
Link from above: http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/
bespoke passionate boltzmann
  03/09/05
Damn that's funny. I love the guy's pic on the right. Wh...
very tactful church incel
  03/23/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
initially i thought that reading this would do him some good...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/09/05
Yeah, there's no way that he can't *not* know what people th...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
"enlighten on the one hand or emotionally distrubed on ...
Olive jew
  03/11/05
He probably googles himself on a regular basis. If xoxo thr...
Jade violent menage
  03/10/05
It's not very "Bush team leader" of him to travel ...
Stirring university old irish cottage
  03/09/05
That website made me feel ashamed to be a Republican.
pink bearded nursing home
  03/09/05
As if the GOP had oodles of dignity in the first place.
Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry
  03/09/05
172
bespoke passionate boltzmann
  03/09/05
I feel the same way. I was really hoping he'd be a wacko lib...
Fluffy Stock Car Locus
  03/11/05
$1000 vegas
racy soggy dog poop native
  03/09/05
i dont get it, why would anyone want to read his schedule an...
trip anal messiness brethren
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
strict scrutiny: he'safag
spruce half-breed orchestra pit
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
ROFL
brass razzmatazz sanctuary cuck
  06/18/05
i know the entire family pretty well, though i'm certainly n...
Alcoholic theater stage sandwich
  03/09/05
we dont need to take it from you, we've got his life story o...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
Taking shit from what?
ungodly pit
  03/09/05
from peers. likely due to stuttering and social awkwardness...
Alcoholic theater stage sandwich
  03/09/05
I know a guy who is a severe stutterer and he was well liked...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
Listen, this guy brings shit upon himself by creating a webs...
Olive jew
  03/11/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
surely you jest?
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/09/05
Is Burbank around this year? I wouldn't want him to get shot...
Costumed Peach Market
  03/09/05
if he really plans to blow away some kids at school im sure ...
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/09/05
hahahahah 1fucking80
spruce half-breed orchestra pit
  03/10/05
A+
Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo
  03/10/05
This reminds me of the good 'ol days of XOXO.
arousing chapel indirect expression
  03/09/05
-
Odious disrespectful theater mental disorder
  03/09/05
Holy Crap, it's David Shifren!
Cruel-hearted internal respiration
  03/10/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/10/05
nice!
red mind-boggling candlestick maker
  03/10/05
I find it strange that this kid's apparently a big ol' feder...
Free-loading nighttime organic girlfriend locale
  03/10/05
You are such asses. I met this guy a couple of weeks ago, a...
floppy startling tanning salon
  03/10/05
Aren't you supposed to go to YLS?
Diverse claret address yarmulke
  03/10/05
HI DAVID
Smoky Rehab Antidepressant Drug
  03/05/06
As soon as he finds out about all of this he's definitely ad...
Maroon Hot House
  03/10/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/10/05
Wow. I thought UVA's republican nerdy guy who everbody knows...
drab exhilarant stage giraffe
  03/10/05
Oh, and whether there was any doubt that this is really him ...
drab exhilarant stage giraffe
  03/10/05
Whats with the magician pictures?
Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency
  03/10/05
What's with the AOL address? At least DeShif got his own dom...
pink bearded nursing home
  03/10/05
This person is a classic example of why all schools should R...
Irradiated learning disabled goyim
  03/10/05
lmao...wow. really. wow. nobody else puts MIDDLE SCHOOL or s...
Geriatric national security agency goal in life
  03/10/05
I cant believe
Laughsome french chef degenerate
  03/10/05
You guys, I am a NATIONAL AP SCHOLAR WITH DISTINCTION and I ...
Domesticated den sweet tailpipe
  03/10/05
How'd that paper go?
Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo
  03/10/05
I just had to turn in the proposal (four pages plus prelimin...
Domesticated den sweet tailpipe
  03/11/05
That's an interesting typo. GL.
Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo
  03/11/05
I will chalk that up to midterms, and also my TTTness.
Domesticated den sweet tailpipe
  03/11/05
It's cool. Yours was an easy question, really; harder has b...
Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo
  03/11/05
Their desire to sleep with members of the adcomm. That's ...
Domesticated den sweet tailpipe
  03/11/05
check out the link to his father's law firm... http://mem...
Concupiscible Indigo Friendly Grandma
  03/10/05
Like father, like son...their webdesign skills are AWFUL.
Appetizing bonkers box office
  06/18/05
You guys are just jealous... My resume is more prestigous th...
Balding charismatic state circlehead
  03/10/05
yeah...that's it
Jade violent menage
  03/10/05
thanks man, I spent 10 minutes reading this post in class, t...
marvelous dark mad cow disease shrine
  03/10/05
I'm not going to make fun of this guy because he's just embl...
High-end senate
  03/10/05
You think Shitren carries business cards with him?
Ebony principal's office
  03/10/05
i suspect they would be 'business binders'
adventurous turquoise dopamine
  03/10/05
LOL. THIS GUY IS A FAGGOT. I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE CLASSES WI...
Fighting heaven tank
  03/10/05
i'm surprised to see people bashing LeBoeuf
vibrant turdskin idiot
  03/10/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/10/05
Well, they did hire this douchebag.
green aromatic range genital piercing
  03/10/05
...
Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown
  03/10/05
I feel bad for the poor guy. So he is a big nerd and he is a...
transparent location
  03/11/05
You're a dolt. By voluntarily making the details of his lif...
misunderstood sneaky criminal
  03/11/05
bump
Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base
  03/23/05
Thanks. I forgot about this.
Lascivious Rose Whorehouse Roommate
  03/23/05
I love it - I can't get enough of it
Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base
  03/23/05
check out his pic w/ Ari Fleischer on his website. Edit...
Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib
  03/23/05
"Hello 911...There is a douchebag harrasing Judge Jones...
Sexy gaming laptop
  03/23/05
Damn, the one on the right of the judge is hot.
Talented erotic home death wish
  03/23/05
Probably spent 2 hours rounding up that many women - only to...
Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base
  03/23/05
Every time I start feeling bad about this thread I think abo...
Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib
  03/23/05
LOOK AT THE MANTITTIES ON THAT TOOL!
beady-eyed gold philosopher-king liquid oxygen
  03/23/05
are you sure?
Histrionic really tough guy
  03/23/05
The Goat has been violated :(
pink bearded nursing home
  03/23/05
...
Opaque lay stain
  03/23/05
wow
pearly 180 point main people
  03/23/05
Yes I know, In fact it's on my resume.
Balding charismatic state circlehead
  03/23/05
I checked - I don't see it on the main page. Is it in Appen...
Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base
  03/23/05
LMFAO
Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib
  03/23/05
Oh man, I think I've passed his father's law practice in Hic...
citrine dilemma scourge upon the earth
  03/23/05
Nope
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/23/05
...
kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness
  03/24/05
Not personally.
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/24/05
Do you know me?
Dashing Beta Nowag Abode
  03/24/05
Nope. Should I?
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/24/05
Yes.
Dashing Beta Nowag Abode
  03/24/05
Or, rather, do I?
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/24/05
Computer Science
fear-inspiring parlor generalized bond
  03/23/05
I'm touched...
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/23/05
i like you
vigorous wine step-uncle's house
  03/23/05
youve got a pair my friend. welcome to the insanity.
titillating jet gunner
  03/24/05
Dear Mr. Shifren, Upon examining your resume, my advisors...
Avocado abusive center mood
  03/24/05
"Please update your resume's "Recognition" se...
Glittery Azure Office Sex Offender
  03/24/05
*bows* I have racked up two 180's tonight. This is unprec...
Avocado abusive center mood
  03/24/05
a truly stirring moment of prestigiousness
Thriller Ceo
  03/24/05
Hey douchebag, I actually found this funny. Well done. Fi...
Salmon curious jap
  03/24/05
Thanks for the vote of confidence- I just had to work out th...
Avocado abusive center mood
  03/24/05
176
orange tantric kitchen immigrant
  03/24/05
You sound pretty nice.
ungodly pit
  03/24/05
please grow up
galvanic cruise ship
  03/24/05
This douche misspelled "university" on his TTTSHIT...
Garnet Trust Fund
  03/23/05
Doh!
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/23/05
be nice, he's a really nice, smart guy. just dorky. he was...
Boyish Zippy Dingle Berry Corn Cake
  03/23/05
Did you ever play spit and shove?
cobalt school
  03/24/05
holy shit -- you know him?
Thriller Ceo
  03/24/05
You're all fucked.
swashbuckling stage laser beams
  03/24/05
why are you responding to MY post, dipshit? i never said any...
Thriller Ceo
  03/24/05
Hey Paul - thanks for the warm wishes. It's good to hear fr...
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/24/05
Cardozo crew...OUCH!
Garnet Trust Fund
  03/24/05
?!
Scarlet legend trailer park
  03/24/05
www.hallmark.com
Dashing Beta Nowag Abode
  03/24/05
Hi David.
Glittery Azure Office Sex Offender
  03/24/05
what I have learned from this thread
gas station boiling water
  03/24/05
why does his phone number have a seattle area code?
cordovan hunting ground corner
  03/24/05
Cell phone, I would assume.
canary depressive property
  04/21/05
probably
Carmine library
  06/18/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg Now we all know what he...
Appetizing bonkers box office
  06/18/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/P4130076.JPG bwahahahaha. Funni...
Appetizing bonkers box office
  06/18/05
David Shifren
purple institution
  06/20/05
What STD's do you have?
Chrome flickering black woman
  06/20/05
Actually, it's very interesting that you ask this question. ...
purple institution
  06/20/05
Shut up.
Kitty Cat Hell
  06/20/05
Eat shit and die.
misunderstood sneaky criminal
  06/20/05
Nice username!
purple institution
  06/20/05
LOL BUMP
poppy meetinghouse wrinkle
  12/19/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG
Mint Arrogant Brunch
  12/19/05
Ride 'em cowboy!
bistre community account queen of the night
  12/19/05
"LEGAL EXPERIENCE LeBoeuf, Lamb, Greene & MacRae...
Lemon Faggot Firefighter
  12/19/05
"Education"
voyeur school cafeteria
  12/19/05
OH MY FUCKING GOD ALL MIGHTY!!!!! This has to be one of the ...
Insane emerald roast beef set
  12/19/05
rock on dave! Also, did you guys notice he attended the I...
effete public bath
  12/20/05
Vicious satire is not 'hatred'. Teacher's pets have always b...
Cream bearded bbw field
  12/20/05
I've got one word.....HA
magical temple
  12/20/05
In keeping with Penn's employed at graduation rate, he must ...
copper blathering
  12/20/05
I saw this loser in Cancun
chestnut legal warrant
  01/16/06
dp
Yellow quadroon
  01/17/06
The fact that he went to cancun by himself. And went to a ba...
Yellow quadroon
  01/17/06
Must have missed...
Scarlet legend trailer park
  01/17/06
I'd like to stick that pudgy meathole of yours
fishy fanboi
  01/17/06
I admire this motherfucker
Coiffed therapy
  01/17/06
He's got moxie. I'll give him that.
jet-lagged flatulent toaster
  01/18/06
LEBOUEFPWN3DDD!!!!111
low-t affirmative action
  01/17/06
I didn't notice the 40 friends, but I wasn't looking for the...
chestnut legal warrant
  01/18/06
you are frighteningly cool
comical pervert
  01/18/06
thats what I keep hearing.
chestnut legal warrant
  01/18/06
Awesome.
disturbing multi-billionaire psychic
  01/18/06
You guys have problems. This guy seems fine. You guys, on th...
Hideous kitty rigpig
  01/17/06
whatever, this fat retarded dumbfuck is the kind of fat reta...
stubborn lilac electric furnace wagecucks
  01/17/06
Who are you talking about? That kid is just a law student. W...
Hideous kitty rigpig
  01/17/06
he seems like a perfectly decent guy. and GTO -- our "...
comical pervert
  01/18/06
bump
Amber bossy ratface
  03/05/06


Poast new message in this thread





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:18 PM
Author: idiotic multi-colored headpube

Anyone here know this douche?

http://www.deshif.com/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295847)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:20 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Wow... just wow. All that's missing is an LSAT score.

# Westlaw Certifications: Advanced Case Law, Advanced Statutory Research, Litigation, International Law, Patent, Trademark, Tax.

# LexisNexis Mastery Certifications: Federal Litigation, Federal Tax, Corporate and Securities, International Law, IP, Environmental Law.

Awarded junior class standing upon matriculation based on advanced high school coursework.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295863)





Date: June 18th, 2005 10:35 AM
Author: Greedy nibblets garrison

Now don't be jealous just because "message board addict" is not elite.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047039)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:21 PM
Author: sable parlour macaca

he evidently was formally congratulated for 'oustanding academic achievement' by alfonse d'amato.

if that's not prestige, then nothing is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295868)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Hey, don't sell him short! He was also formally congratulated by

* Nassau County Executive Thomas Gulotta.

* Suffolk County Executive Robert Gaffney.

* U.S. Congressman Gary Ackerman.

* New York State Senate President Pro Tem and Majority Leader Ralph Marino.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295887)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: godawful impertinent space

That's the most TTT part of that whole travesty of a CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296054)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

Have you considered that the resume people post on their personal website is different from their "real" resume that they use for employment purposes?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296894)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:30 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

go away, David

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296912)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

Dude the guy is in Cuba right now. See below.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296933)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

but you also said you'll have internet access every day or two, David. and I doubt you're rocking out w/ the social events.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296941)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

PWN3D!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296961)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

Not really. Just because there is one civilized person on xoxo who would come to this guy's defense doesn't mean its actually him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296967)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:47 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

when i started HS i was a pretty big dork, and i got picked on big time, and righfully so. it really sucked at the time, but im glad people were 'uncivil' to me, because it was only going to be worse at the next level unless i started becoming a little more self-aware of my social image. good, bad, right, wrong - that is just the way it is. you can stick up for this kid (or defend yourself if you are him), but the fact is, we are doing him (you) a favor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297073)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

Actually from his schedule it looks like he's all booked. Sorry dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296966)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:39 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

David, it's obviously you b/c no one else would be so persistent and call us naughty names out of nowhere. and I totally don't even recognize your moniker.

also allow me take this opportunity to tell you that my LS is more prestigious than yours, David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296990)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

Dude the guy is in cuba on spring break. Give it a rest dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297028)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM
Author: Hilarious black crotch indian lodge

Speaking of that, does he have treasury department clearance? We should notify the treasury department just in case.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297039)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:46 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

I like you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297057)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:12 AM
Author: Dashing Beta Nowag Abode

I love you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394226)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:24 PM
Author: vivacious blue site

who puts Mensa membership on a resume?!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295902)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: idiotic multi-colored headpube

Same guys who list Westlaw certification.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295920)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:20 PM
Author: orchid provocative stag film pozpig

Correct.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297372)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: ruddy slap-happy gaping hairy legs

He says he was "featured" in Newsday, and then links to a blurb listing a bunch of local national merit scholar semi-finalists from 1997. Excellent stuff.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295918)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM
Author: Abnormal knife idea he suggested

nice, not even a finalist.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295950)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:52 PM
Author: comical pervert

and the onion "feature" is a photograph with a bunch of people seemingly chosen because they exude douchebaggery.

every law school has one of these guys. what's most amazing here is that the list of achievements is so long without even one of them being at all impresive. and "westlaw certification" is bizarre. that's like saying you have a driver's license.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298538)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

Oh my God. I didn't know that there was an actual place called "Hicksville," but apparently, there is.

My friend's bf is on law review at Penn...I'll have to ask about this dude.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295922)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM
Author: big offensive national



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296222)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:06 PM
Author: hairraiser translucent water buffalo station

this is only relevant if something actually pans out....so i'll keep my bashing quiet til then.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296271)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:18 PM
Author: vibrant turdskin idiot

i know, i thought it was just an expression until i stood at penn station and read the flashing signs for the long island railroad.

apparently hicksville girls wear white jeans and have really big bangs, though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303157)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM
Author: Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo

http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/gazetteer?city=hicksville&state=&zip=

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308455)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:22 PM
Author: citrine dilemma scourge upon the earth

Hicksville is full of smelly Indians. And now the Broadway Mall has a Wal-Mart, too. Truly a TTT town.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391094)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: gay persian

Check out the links in his recogintion section. Almost all of them are bad links. That oozes prestige.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295934)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:29 PM
Author: bespoke passionate boltzmann

Hey, at least we know he was in the Onion. Only thing more prestigious than that is being in Leiter.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295948)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: gay persian

Let's not forget the prestige involved in working for Daddy for the last 8 years.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295975)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:36 PM
Author: Olive jew

Hey, this guy may be dorkey but he came by it honestly. Did you see the link to his father's website. Oh, and check out the link to Greater New York Mensa. The pictures of these losers will keep you laughing for a long, long time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308258)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:20 PM
Author: khaki keepsake machete

Not to mention the fact that his appearance in the Onion featured him getting mocked for being a huge goddamn dork. Prestige in spades.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297888)





Date: April 5th, 2005 6:09 PM
Author: chest-beating hall dysfunction

Was this all really true? I feel like it's some bizarre part of the space-time continuum, but I can't help but laugh as I read the whole thing....

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2492350)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:13 AM
Author: Heady Area

This is why there are so many self hating jews.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046335)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM
Author: Crystalline toilet seat

They actually used him for a photo shoot for the Onion when they needed a picture of a douche. Superb.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295894)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:25 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

LOL

http://www.deshif.com/onion.htm

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295909)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM
Author: massive theatre foreskin

classic

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295960)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: Irradiated learning disabled goyim

Someone should email this to everyone at upenn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295937)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal Hissy Fit

He's already pretty famous around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295962)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

Do share.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295982)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM
Author: Fiercely-loyal Hissy Fit

From what I've witnessed, he's very active and outspoken. But I don't know him personally.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295992)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:37 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Don't know him personally, but he caused quite a stir at the EJF auction a couple of weeks ago when he bid almost $1000 for picnic with a young/popular professor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296010)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:40 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

http://www.dailypennsylvanian.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/09/22/4151207d44b7f

Goodness, his grades come up in an article about massages?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296031)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

LOL, good find.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296049)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:48 PM
Author: Wonderful associate stead

I'm *sure* he takes advantage of the massages just because of stress during exams. Probably his only outlet for flesh-on-flesh contact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296094)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:14 PM
Author: cerebral private investor plaza

is that abnormal? Those professor things go for a ton at the CLF auction here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296767)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:17 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297339)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:42 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297533)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: bespoke passionate boltzmann

In case you ever want to get in touch with him, http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295938)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM
Author: ruddy slap-happy gaping hairy legs

someone should IM him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295972)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: Jade violent menage

"Facilitated development of interpersonal and social skills through interaction with elderly psychiatric patients"

OMG. We all puff our resumes a bit, but come on! This shit's embarrassing to read.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295978)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM
Author: gay persian

With such a schedule, how does he find time to bang all the hot chicks I'm sure are beating down his door?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295990)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:42 PM
Author: Ocher Doobsian Regret Juggernaut

VIRGIN

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296045)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: nubile telephone windowlicker

You HAVE to read the Nikkei link. Who on earth would put a story about being fired on their resume?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296051)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: gay persian

I wish Milk Chan was here. She could say this much better than I can - "YOU DUMBASS!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296073)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Oh Christ, I didn't even notice that:

A pink slipper David Shifren, software engineer, was laid off from a newly built telecommunication company in November just two weeks after he was hired. "I do want to work for a IT-related company again," says Shifren, who talked to four recruiters at the party that night. "But next one must be a place where I can get a decent training."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296076)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

The MSNBC article is also about losing his dot-com job when the company was "NASDAQ'd" -- not something I think I'd want to advertise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296161)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:01 AM
Author: Walnut stimulating casino boistinker

Holy Shit. Nice find.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838464)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: Contagious athletic conference new version

With all of these lame hobbies, how does he find time for the most important facet of his existence: furtively masturbating to TeenPeople for hours at a time?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296066)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:53 PM
Author: nubile telephone windowlicker

Oh, even the busiest person can find time for that. Um, I've heard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296131)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:47 PM
Author: ruby insanely creepy patrolman

Leboeuf is a good place to work. Seriously.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296088)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Ha... I guess that goes to show how much personality matters, when good grades and law review only gets you LeBoeuf.

However, the fact that even he can make $125k should show how well Penn places ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296163)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:59 PM
Author: ruby insanely creepy patrolman

I was actually being serious, I thought the people there were better than people I met elsewhere.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296185)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Really? Very interesting.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296199)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM
Author: ruby insanely creepy patrolman

Like I told you eariler, it's not just about vault rank.

*edit* however since guy is working there, my opinion is going to drop.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296233)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM
Author: Fragrant carnelian striped hyena

he's still a douche if he makes 450K.

hth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296237)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM
Author: big offensive national

[Oh, fine. Guilt edit.]

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296235)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:02 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

Did you guys catch this one:

Keyboards/cowbell/lute: Captain Buzzkill & the Bringdowns

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296676)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:03 PM
Author: exciting piazza hominid

i GOTTA have more cowbell!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296685)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:05 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296695)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

He's on the masthead of the Penn Law Review...this is really, really elaborate if someone is just making fun of him. That doesn't make sense.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296703)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:07 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296712)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM
Author: Diverse claret address yarmulke

"Cancun Hot Body '03 & '04""

I don't believe it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296751)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

see the WHOIS i posted below

his website was registered about 2 years ago, that means someone would have to hack his domain to put that stuff up there and i cant believe anyone would put that much effort into a prank

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296826)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:24 PM
Author: hairraiser translucent water buffalo station

Yeah, unless he holds fat *exclusively* in his bean and nowhere else, that's just not happening.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296861)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:15 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

he wants his loved ones to know what flights he's on in case a plane goes down. covering his bases. how sweet. I'm sure everyone cares.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296779)





Date: January 17th, 2006 11:01 AM
Author: elite love of her life

how did he get direct HAV-MIA flights?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838942)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:13 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

I actually know someone a lot like this in real life. These people exist. Every two months I get a listserved email update that's 20 pages long --and I'm pretty sure unless you're Batman or something no one has 20 pages worth in 2 months

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296759)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

Notice that this guy's resume is so douchey that no one is even talking about how fat and ugly he is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296701)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296704)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:47 PM
Author: Fluffy Stock Car Locus

Oh, geez. Now I'm ashamed that I have something in common with him.

It was basically a fricking EMAIL LIST.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308377)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:10 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

mental note: don't try to get job with Leboeuf in the fall

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296732)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:11 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

Looks legit to me, here is the WHOIS on his domain:

Domain: deshif.com

Registrant

David Shifren

deshif@optonline.net

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.1111111111

Administrative

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

Billing

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

Technical

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296744)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296748)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:16 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

is anyone a Duke alum here? they could write and ask him for advice or something

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296794)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: Bateful aquamarine round eye

NicoBlue is. They might have been in the same graduating class.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297655)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:19 PM
Author: Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency

The funniest part is how he lists his upcoming summer associate position under his experiences.

After that, its his schedule that takes the cake. This guy is so damn self important that he has to post his class schedule online!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296814)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM
Author: Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency

scratch that - look at his calendar - he has all these cheesy singles or whatever meeting listed as if he has something to do. So sad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296825)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:22 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

I think listing the summer associate position is fine -- it's the advice the HLS OCS would give any 2L.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296834)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:26 PM
Author: soul-stirring halford useless brakes

But for something that reeks of prestige, that's not exactly the most prestigous of firms.

And nobody cares what Harvard would do, you cunt.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296877)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

I think that someone called "HLSking" probably does care, and that's who I was talking to, genius.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297144)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

This board is filled with many vicious people. Even "respected" posters like rk982 and hanna jumped on the bully bandwagon. Pathetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296882)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

STFU

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296884)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

I hope you have a nice life being a dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296949)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

it's been working pretty well for me so far. thanks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296962)





Date: January 17th, 2006 6:19 PM
Author: stubborn lilac electric furnace wagecucks

HAHA, that was fucking beautiful

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842140)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:42 PM
Author: big offensive national

I did feel a little bad about it, yeah. Oh well.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297018)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

Same here. Too late. And anyway, posting a web site like that is the virtual equivalent of going on reality TV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297151)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: silver resort pistol

Correct.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297707)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:24 AM
Author: pale excitant police squad

Agreed. Not very nice.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300443)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM
Author: Spectacular lettuce
Subject: THE SCHIFREN STORY



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296903)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: nubile telephone windowlicker

He might be mildly autistic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296939)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

I don't think autistic people would stalk people though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296951)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:41 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

This guy is a weirdo but its not his fault. You can't choose the way you are born or how you talk. If anyone else here was born with all the hurdles that this guy apparantly has, I guarantee they would have rolled over and given up. Personally, I think this guy is lucky he's a genius because god knows he isn't getting by on his looks or by being a smooth talker. If he has to interview aggressively because he is a social weirdo, more power to him for going after what he wants. As for talking in class, tons of people do that, he only gets picked on because he is ugly and has a stutter.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297014)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM
Author: Hilarious black crotch indian lodge

Also, he is apparently a massive tool and faggot and all-around loser.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297033)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

No doubt he is. But its still incredibly vicious to savage a stranger on an internet board like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297050)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:49 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

look out the window, Davey. it's a cruel world.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297087)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:52 PM
Author: supple deranged church building faggotry

I understand it may be difficult for a dickhead like you to understand that nice people exist. I assure you that just because a random poster takes the opposite side from you in an argument doesn't mean that poster must be the subject of the debate.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297113)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM
Author: Hilarious black crotch indian lodge

Did you learn that during Westlaw certification?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297259)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:12 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Nah, he learned it at Mensa.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297309)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:07 PM
Author: unholy mustard fortuitous meteor jewess

absurd defense of a tool - check

excessively logical style of argumentation - check

egregious self-promotion ("nice guy") - check

use of the phrase "subject of the debate" - check

Hi David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297274)





Date: January 17th, 2006 11:07 AM
Author: elite love of her life



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838964)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM
Author: Razzle bull headed gay wizard crackhouse

also, he defends himself on anonymous internet message boards. and unconvincingly might I add.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297052)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:11 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297302)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:51 PM
Author: Fluffy Stock Car Locus

"I think this guy is lucky he's a genius..."

Wait, back up. How do we know he's a genius? The Mensa membership? National Merit Finalist? The years working for his father? What?

I've seen absolutely no evidence of that?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308401)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:01 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Woah, that was him? The stalking rumor was circulating among 1Ls early in the term but I didn't know it was about him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297215)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:04 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

i doubt that there is a lurking xoxo reader that became so disgusted that they would come to this guy's defense

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297248)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM
Author: orchid provocative stag film pozpig

"he constantly raises his hand and has one of the worst speech impediments ive ever heard. it often takes him minutes to get out a word becuase of his stuttering problem."

Holy shit, I think I sat in on a Con Law class at Penn last year with this dude. It was the day he was called on. I was stunned.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297493)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:53 PM
Author: Olive jew
Subject: loser

This guy is the next David Berkowitz/Son of Sam. Mark my words and watch and see!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308418)





Date: March 11th, 2005 9:34 PM
Author: Bat-shit-crazy sound barrier forum
Subject: ::passes out in shock::

Oh my god. It's like the three most annoying people I know combined into one.

My sympathies to all at Penn.

At some level I feel bad for the guy, clearly teased a lot early on in life and is compensating a hell of a lot to make up for it. Unfortunately this compensation only leads to more ridiculing for being a total weirdo.

On another level, we've all been made fun of in life. And plenty of people do not turn into completely socially inept people because of it. In fact, sometimes the most well adjusted people I know where teased a lot in grade school. So that's no excuse.

And frankly, on a personal level, I have been the recipient of strange creepy guys hitting on me and it's no fun. So if he's stalking people I have a serious problem with that.

Reasons not to attend Penn...:-p

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2311750)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:46 AM
Author: motley frozen trump supporter spot

This kid sounds like the equivalent of a 1L at Vanderbilt who is often referred to as "the dragon."

edit: but with more tact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394021)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM
Author: Hilarious black crotch indian lodge

Isn't 'Shifren' a Jewish name?

Jewish mafia, do something about this!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296932)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: nubile telephone windowlicker

Forget it, the Nikkei link alone is enough to excommunicate him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297445)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM
Author: Lake aphrodisiac hospital

Uh, check out the Onion link. I think that is him in the satin shirt. LOL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297046)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: violet puppy

I'm surpised he didn't call it a "model shoot" on his CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297694)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM
Author: unholy mustard fortuitous meteor jewess

This Deshif guy has proven to me that not only does God have a sense of humor, He's actually a cynical bastard. Keep up the good work, oh Lord of Heaven.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297258)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:19 PM
Author: Deep fat ankles lodge

What's the only part of his busy schedule he doesn't report here: http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm ??

His weekly NAMBLA meetings. Look at this picture: http://www.deshif.com/david.jpg He'd be perfect in NRA-style "I am NAMBLA" advertisements.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297359)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:24 PM
Author: electric prole

I knew this guy at Duke - not well, but I took some classes with him and majored in a similar, overlapping field.

There are two types of nerds: those who are quiet, nice-guy nerds (with whom I have no problem, and often befriend, even) and those who are aggressive, obnoxious, arrogant nerds (e.g. Bill Gates). This guy is in the second class.

It's kind of TTT to do this to the poor guy, though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297401)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: bespoke passionate boltzmann

Do you know anything about him stalking girls?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297439)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297457)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:33 PM
Author: orchid provocative stag film pozpig

LMAO, that is an awesome story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297469)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

I was there too... Unfortunately, what dickcheese posted was 100% accurate.

You just had to see it... He literally jumped out of his seat and was standing in front of the auctioneer waving his paddle around and around. It was insane.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297489)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:38 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

what was the expression of the profs face?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297504)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

She wasn't there, she just donated the item. Dunno what her reaction to this is, but like dickcheese said above, I'd be pretty freaked out. I don't even know if DeShif is going to bring 3 people with him or if he's just going to go alone with her.

The audience was laughing, but it was very uneasy... I mean, it's kind of like how a lot of people reacted to the J cutting herself thing from that xo thread the other day... The whole situation was pretty funny but when you realize that he isn't playing and is 100% serious, it kind of freaks you out after the fact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297529)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

am i the only one that thinks he'll show up and introduce his three imaginary best friends

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297542)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297557)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

well played!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297660)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297692)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:28 PM
Author: ungodly pit

Edit:

I'm starting to feel bad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297429)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297440)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM
Author: nubile telephone windowlicker

I think he emceed my Bar Mitzvah.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297455)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:32 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!

Unbelievable, simply unbelievable... From the tux, to the U.S. Supreme Court bar, to the AOL URL...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297465)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

what does it take to graduate 'near' the top of your class at Fordham?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297531)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:45 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

I dunno about that, but it must be pretty damn hard to become an adjunct professor of law at the local community college.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297561)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:48 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

his son is obviously a better web designer and goes to a much more prestigious law school. i wonder what shif sr. must be like in real life.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297587)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:51 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Eh, after seeing DeShif.com Penn doesn't feel very prestigious anymore :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297610)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297654)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297547)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297631)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:58 PM
Author: bespoke passionate boltzmann

Link from above:

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297688)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:36 PM
Author: very tactful church incel

Damn that's funny.

I love the guy's pic on the right. What a fag.

This confirms it: douchebaggery is genetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391196)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297558)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

initially i thought that reading this would do him some good. (as i posted above, i was a pretty big dork in HS, simply because i was just so unaware of social norms and my social image. getting picked on honestly did wonders for my life since then)

but in my experience there are just some kids that dont get it and dont care. the type of guys that you might invite to sit with you at lunch or invite out for a beer just to make an effort to include them, but they turn out to be even weirder than you expected. the guy obviously enjoys his life and is proud of his accomplishments. i cant imagine him reading this thread and being enlightened on the one hand or emotionally hurt on the other.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297623)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297647)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:24 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

Yeah, there's no way that he can't *not* know what people think of him here. He probably doesn't care or loves it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298364)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:04 PM
Author: Olive jew

"enlighten on the one hand or emotionally distrubed on the other". Are you kidding? This guy is going to update his resume/CV to include this link to show how much people are talking about him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308523)





Date: March 10th, 2005 9:32 AM
Author: Jade violent menage

He probably googles himself on a regular basis. If xoxo threads turn up in google, he'll find it himself.

I just googled him on my own, and he's listed as the treasurer of the Golden Key at Hunter. 2003.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300319)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:50 PM
Author: Stirring university old irish cottage

It's not very "Bush team leader" of him to travel to red Cuba and spend his Euros there!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297607)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

That website made me feel ashamed to be a Republican.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297622)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:57 PM
Author: Cocky Self-centered Newt Cuckoldry

As if the GOP had oodles of dignity in the first place.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297666)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: bespoke passionate boltzmann

172

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297706)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:02 PM
Author: Fluffy Stock Car Locus

I feel the same way. I was really hoping he'd be a wacko liberal.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308498)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM
Author: racy soggy dog poop native

$1000 vegas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297648)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:44 PM
Author: trip anal messiness brethren

i dont get it, why would anyone want to read his schedule and calendar? what is the purpose of having that shit on his website? The resume is one thing, but why do i need to know where he is every second of every single day?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298093)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:55 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298193)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:47 PM
Author: spruce half-breed orchestra pit

strict scrutiny: he'safag

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298507)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:22 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298729)





Date: June 18th, 2005 10:22 AM
Author: brass razzmatazz sanctuary cuck

ROFL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047023)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:25 PM
Author: Alcoholic theater stage sandwich

i know the entire family pretty well, though i'm certainly not friends with david.

give him a break. he's been taking shit his whole life.

and don't bring the dad into it. shitty website or not, take it from me, the guy's pretty fucking successful.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298755)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:31 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

we dont need to take it from you, we've got his life story on a website

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298787)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: ungodly pit

Taking shit from what?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298793)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:35 PM
Author: Alcoholic theater stage sandwich

from peers. likely due to stuttering and social awkwardness, as well as his looks. he might be annoying as all hell in large groups, but he's a pretty nice guy otherwise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298815)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

I know a guy who is a severe stutterer and he was well liked and successful at HYS -- he was on law review and ended up at a top-5 NY firm. Law school may look like high school, but it's not.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298893)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:14 PM
Author: Olive jew

Listen, this guy brings shit upon himself by creating a website like and by out-biding himself for a picnic. If he get's picked on because of his actions, it's his own fault.

I actually started to feel sorry for this guy until I read his sense of self importance. There are likeable nerds but this guy isn't one of them. So, if he gets picked on... oh well. That said, he'll probably have the last laugh after he explodes and goes postal on all of us.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308609)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298802)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:36 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

surely you jest?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298823)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:38 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298842)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:40 PM
Author: Costumed Peach Market

Is Burbank around this year? I wouldn't want him to get shot.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298864)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:41 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

if he really plans to blow away some kids at school im sure he'll update his calendar online before he does it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298872)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:10 AM
Author: spruce half-breed orchestra pit

hahahahah 1fucking80

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299424)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:55 PM
Author: Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo

A+

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300946)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM
Author: arousing chapel indirect expression

This reminds me of the good 'ol days of XOXO.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298899)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:48 PM
Author: Odious disrespectful theater mental disorder

-

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298916)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:52 AM
Author: Cruel-hearted internal respiration
Subject: Holy Crap, it's David Shifren!

I went to college with this guy. He was notorious on campus for being the biggest nerd at the entire school. I can't say I really ever talked to him, but he was a total tool.

1. I know of at least two girls that had to get restraining orders against him because he stalked them. He would wait outside their dorms for them every day, all day. No social graces, couldn't figure out that just because a girl smiled at you in class does not make her your new best friend.

2. I saw him on Halloween one year wearing a cheerleading outfit. Keep in mind, he's at least 70 pounds overweight. And he wasn't the funny fat kid in a group of friends doing it to be funny. It was very creepy.

3. As others have noted, he's the arrogant, aggressive, supernerd. We all hated him.

4. I don't know if he got kicked out of school for stalking, but it certainly wouldn't surprise me. His picture isn't in the class yearbook, and he's not listed in the online alumni directory.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299290)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:29 AM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299554)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:12 AM
Author: red mind-boggling candlestick maker

nice!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299840)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:38 AM
Author: Free-loading nighttime organic girlfriend locale

I find it strange that this kid's apparently a big ol' federalist but is also in "journal of law and social change" (sounds liberal) and STREET LAW.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300222)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:13 AM
Author: floppy startling tanning salon

You are such asses. I met this guy a couple of weeks ago, and he seems fine in real life. Give him a break.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300239)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:28 AM
Author: Diverse claret address yarmulke

Aren't you supposed to go to YLS?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300450)





Date: March 5th, 2006 2:36 AM
Author: Smoky Rehab Antidepressant Drug

HI DAVID

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251259)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:26 AM
Author: Maroon Hot House

As soon as he finds out about all of this he's definitely adding "The Most Prestigious Admissions Board in the World" to the "featured in" section of his CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300243)





Date: March 10th, 2005 11:36 AM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300735)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:33 AM
Author: drab exhilarant stage giraffe

Wow. I thought UVA's republican nerdy guy who everbody knows who has a website was sort of toolish, but he looks like Miles Davis compared to Mr. Shif.

I don't know why I posted this, as I won't say who the UVA guy is, so don't bother asking.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300245)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:56 AM
Author: drab exhilarant stage giraffe

Oh, and whether there was any doubt that this is really him putting up the site, well, I think it runs in the family

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300257)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:15 PM
Author: Navy Infuriating International Law Enforcement Agency

Whats with the magician pictures?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301101)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:25 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

What's with the AOL address? At least DeShif got his own domain name.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302842)





Date: March 10th, 2005 8:38 AM
Author: Irradiated learning disabled goyim

This person is a classic example of why all schools should REQUIRE interviews before offering admission.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300268)





Date: March 10th, 2005 8:51 AM
Author: Geriatric national security agency goal in life

lmao...wow. really. wow. nobody else puts MIDDLE SCHOOL or sophomore year of high school "honors" on their stuff, right? and is a link to "Spanish" in "Proficient in Spanish - verbal and written communication" really necessary?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300278)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:43 AM
Author: Laughsome french chef degenerate
Subject: I cant believe

Im sorry... I'm really still in disbelief that people like this actually exist. What happens to them? ARe these the kind of people who become famously successful? I have to assume no way... but I actually think his resume is preety fucking prestigious.

Nonetheless, I'm sure he scores in the bottom 10th percentile on all standardized social skill tests. He reminds me of that guy in office space, milton.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300493)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:56 AM
Author: Domesticated den sweet tailpipe

You guys, I am a NATIONAL AP SCHOLAR WITH DISTINCTION and I didn't put that anywhere in my applications. Am I screwed?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300549)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:57 PM
Author: Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo

How'd that paper go?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300958)





Date: March 11th, 2005 12:35 PM
Author: Domesticated den sweet tailpipe

I just had to turn in the proposal (four pages plus preliminary bibliography) and he ate it up, gave me an A, and said it is a wonderful and unique topic.

I can only assume that Peen Law Review is in my future, but seriously, thanks. ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2307844)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:56 PM
Author: Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo

That's an interesting typo.

GL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308444)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM
Author: Domesticated den sweet tailpipe

I will chalk that up to midterms, and also my TTTness.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308451)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:58 PM
Author: Cracking chartreuse cuckold tattoo

It's cool. Yours was an easy question, really; harder has been answering the "What should I write my college essay about?" questions (I teach high school, if you didn't already know that)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308465)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:26 PM
Author: Domesticated den sweet tailpipe

Their desire to sleep with members of the adcomm.

That's what I wrote my law one on. ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308720)





Date: March 10th, 2005 11:09 AM
Author: Concupiscible Indigo Friendly Grandma

check out the link to his father's law firm...

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

who puts a picture of themselves like that up on their professional site.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300609)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:35 AM
Author: Appetizing bonkers box office

Like father, like son...their webdesign skills are AWFUL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046420)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:30 PM
Author: Balding charismatic state circlehead

You guys are just jealous... My resume is more prestigous than yours, my father is more presitgous than yours, and the girl that I stalk and will one day be my girlfriend is more prestigous than your girlfriend.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300788)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:43 PM
Author: Jade violent menage

yeah...that's it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300847)





Date: March 10th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: marvelous dark mad cow disease shrine

thanks man, I spent 10 minutes reading this post in class, then you post this, I lose my shit and starting laughing out loud in Con Law. Luckily, the teacher did not say anything.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301861)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:31 PM
Author: High-end senate

I'm not going to make fun of this guy because he's just emblematic of the Republican Party (David Shifren = New School Karl Rove) and Long Island as a whole.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301466)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:49 PM
Author: Ebony principal's office

You think Shitren carries business cards with him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301563)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:36 PM
Author: adventurous turquoise dopamine

i suspect they would be 'business binders'

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302913)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:24 PM
Author: Fighting heaven tank

LOL. THIS GUY IS A FAGGOT. I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE CLASSES WITH HIM THOUGH. NON STOP COMEDY EVERY DAY. LOL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303187)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:32 PM
Author: vibrant turdskin idiot

i'm surprised to see people bashing LeBoeuf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303231)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:33 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304313)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:34 PM
Author: green aromatic range genital piercing

Well, they did hire this douchebag.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304326)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:39 PM
Author: Embarrassed To The Bone Business Firm Clown



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304370)





Date: March 11th, 2005 10:42 PM
Author: transparent location

I feel bad for the poor guy. So he is a big nerd and he is annoying. I get it.

I would be mortified if I went on the internet and read hundreds of messages making fun of me. No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are. I say it's time to call off the hounds.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2312190)





Date: March 11th, 2005 10:46 PM
Author: misunderstood sneaky criminal

You're a dolt. By voluntarily making the details of his life visible to all, he has thoroughly forfeited any entitlement to pity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2312228)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:26 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388651)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:31 PM
Author: Lascivious Rose Whorehouse Roommate

Thanks. I forgot about this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388684)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:40 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base

I love it - I can't get enough of it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388752)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 4:25 PM
Author: Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib

check out his pic w/ Ari Fleischer on his website.

Edit: Is that real silk? http://www.deshif.com/pix/ARI.JPG

(probably right after meeting Ari: riding the goat - http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2389187)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:00 PM
Author: Sexy gaming laptop

"Hello 911...There is a douchebag harrasing Judge Jones and some of her interns..."

http://www.deshif.com/pix/BSJ1.JPG

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2389993)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: Talented erotic home death wish

Damn, the one on the right of the judge is hot.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390003)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base

Probably spent 2 hours rounding up that many women - only to have his shot ruined by another male in the background.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390007)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:17 PM
Author: Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib

Every time I start feeling bad about this thread I think about the past two presidential elections. The fact that I feel bad at all is the problem. Democrats need to learn to be heartless a$$holes. Might as well learn by practicing on Republicans. (NOTE: I do like Christine Todd Whitman, but I'm pretty sure she isn't a real Republican).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390098)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:24 PM
Author: beady-eyed gold philosopher-king liquid oxygen

LOOK AT THE MANTITTIES ON THAT TOOL!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391100)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:47 PM
Author: Histrionic really tough guy
Subject: are you sure?

Ombudsman,

Please view this picture that he VOLUNTARILY posted on his website: http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg (and recently mentioned above)...

Do you still contend that "No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are."



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390332)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM
Author: pink bearded nursing home

The Goat has been violated :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390340)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:27 PM
Author: Opaque lay stain



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391123)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM
Author: pearly 180 point main people
Subject: wow

does this poor guy even know he's getting totally owned on xoxo by now? somebody must have told him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390345)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:53 PM
Author: Balding charismatic state circlehead

Yes I know, In fact it's on my resume.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390375)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:55 PM
Author: Razzle-dazzle fuchsia base

I checked - I don't see it on the main page. Is it in Appendix C?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390389)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 10:18 PM
Author: Mildly autistic ticket booth shitlib

LMFAO

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391927)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:47 PM
Author: citrine dilemma scourge upon the earth

Oh man, I think I've passed his father's law practice in Hicksville. The one I'm thinking of has its phone number in huge gold numbers on the front of the building, so I'll have to pay more attention the next time I pass it. It's right near where LILCO was, so I think that could be it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391312)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:52 PM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park
Subject: Nope

That's Dominic Barbara's practice. My father's practice used to be down the road from there but no longer is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392841)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:54 AM
Author: kink-friendly burgundy bawdyhouse twinkling uncleanness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394077)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:57 AM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park

Not personally.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394103)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:11 AM
Author: Dashing Beta Nowag Abode

Do you know me?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394220)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:14 AM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park

Nope. Should I?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394245)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM
Author: Dashing Beta Nowag Abode

Yes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394273)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:19 AM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park

Or, rather, do I?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394301)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:48 PM
Author: fear-inspiring parlor generalized bond
Subject: Computer Science

When I first saw that photo, I thought to myself "computer science." Then I scrolled down the page and . . .

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391320)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:30 PM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park
Subject: I'm touched...

... that everyone seems to find my site so hilarious.

1. Yes, the site is real. I'm real. And I'm really DEShif himself. (To prove it's me, here's the IM I got from Jim Adler: Mr Jim Adler (7:12:27 PM): You seriously have got to be the biggest tool I have ever come across in my life. Your resume is pathetic and the fact that you list the things that you do on your away message is just sad.)

2. Neither "xeris" nor "David Shifren" are me. I just found about this forum (and, indeed, this site) tonight when someone posted to my site's forum.

3. The story about my bidding for $950 for picnic with Struve is true. I did have a group lined up (although not at that price). And it has nothing to do with her looks or gender and everything to do with market competition. You may recall I also bought events with Profs. Roosevelt, Persily, Parchomovsky, and Prichett (all male). The only reason I spent $950 for this one was because a group of 1Ls bid up to $900.

4. The rumors about expulsion from Duke, restraining orders, or any stalking at all are utterly untrue. Ask the admissions office if you don't believe me - they've seen my records.

5. The photo of Judge Jones' chambers really are the clerks and interns. At the time it was taken, I was the only male in the office. And, no, that's not why I took the job!

6. Yes, the hot body championships are true. And, yes, I won them despite (or perhaps due to?) my being fat and ugly.

7. This online resume isn't the same as my actual, paper resume. That one is one page and omits almost all of the minor things which are on the online resume. This one is much more comprehensive and (perhaps exhaustively) detailed.

8. Finally, the purpose behind the event calendar and schedule is twofold: first, for my own convenience - I don't have a PDA and secondly, because my friends (yes, I do have friends!) sometimes use it to see what's going on, what classes I'm taking, or when I'm free.

9. The Cuba trip was legal (and quite fun) - I had Treasury Dept. permission through the law school to conduct academic research.

10. Finally, despite what many on the board have speculated, I am neither gay nor a virgin (although, admittedly, I am single). And, in response to your next question, I've never used a prostitute.

Let me know if you have any other questions. :)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392604)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: vigorous wine step-uncle's house

i like you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392631)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:17 AM
Author: titillating jet gunner

youve got a pair my friend. welcome to the insanity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393135)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:29 AM
Author: Avocado abusive center mood

Dear Mr. Shifren,

Upon examining your resume, my advisors and I have concluded that I am more prestigious than you. While you have achieved some prestigiousness in your day, you simply do not rival the glorious elitism that is 174. HTH.

Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition.

Feel free to ask for advice if you ever need help not being a TTT.

Gloriously elite,

174

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393269)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:45 AM
Author: Glittery Azure Office Sex Offender

"Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition"

Yes. 180.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393429)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:47 AM
Author: Avocado abusive center mood

*bows*

I have racked up two 180's tonight. This is unprecedented.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393449)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:28 AM
Author: Thriller Ceo

a truly stirring moment of prestigiousness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393893)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:43 AM
Author: Salmon curious jap

Hey douchebag,

I actually found this funny. Well done. Finally youre getting the hang of utilizing your schtick in an effective manner. Keep it up, and Ill refrain from embarassing you.

Hugs and Kisses,

YOUREANIDIOT

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394007)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:36 AM
Author: Avocado abusive center mood

Thanks for the vote of confidence- I just had to work out the kinks.

I sure am glad you're done "embarassing" me!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394464)





Date: March 24th, 2005 11:27 AM
Author: orange tantric kitchen immigrant

176

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395868)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:35 AM
Author: ungodly pit

You sound pretty nice.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393946)





Date: March 24th, 2005 5:12 PM
Author: galvanic cruise ship
Subject: please grow up

Greetings.

Making fun of others is fine. We all do it.

It is extremely cowardly, however, to do so anonymously, hiding behind the cloak of a website.

Thus, I present a real, working email address:

adamspamguard-autoadmit@yahoo.com

[Of course, this is a temporary address, I can keep it as long (or short) as I want. But for now it goes straight to my inbox]

Anyway. I strongly recommend that many of you think long and hard about your desire and readiness for law school. These types of baseless attacks simply are not welcome within these halls.

If nothing else, please do not come to Penn. You won't fit in and we won't accept these types of attitudes and behaviors.

And in the future, if you have something to say, please at least attach a name and email.

--Adam

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398319)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: Garnet Trust Fund

This douche misspelled "university" on his TTTSHITEATINGFAGGOT resume!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392639)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:47 PM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park
Subject: Doh!

Wow, how embarrassing! Thanks for letting me know! I'll fix it right away! (Good thing this isn't the resume I send to employers!)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392798)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:48 PM
Author: Boyish Zippy Dingle Berry Corn Cake

be nice, he's a really nice, smart guy. just dorky. he was in my freshman dorm.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392806)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:12 AM
Author: cobalt school

Did you ever play spit and shove?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393083)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:29 AM
Author: Thriller Ceo

holy shit -- you know him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393896)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM
Author: swashbuckling stage laser beams
Subject: You're all fucked.

I know David from another school he went to. Yes, he sat in the front and raised his hand, and yes he would often annoy the teacher, and yes it took him a little while to get his words out and yes he was akward with girls and akward in general.

However, he has a good heart. He is a good guy. He is never mean, always positive and if he comes off arrogant sometimes, well re-read the aforegoing posts and ask yourself why someone who is constantly made fun of might act like that. I wasn't his best friend, or really knew him, but someone told me of this post today and we all talked about why it was sad that there were so many immature children who could not be supportive of those around them who might be challenged in one way or another. Maybe sometimes people paint targets on themselves, but who are we to hurl shit at them.

I wish David the best of luck. I think he should, if he is reading this, understand that people are jealous, in the case of these posts, it pervades their comments, and finally David, all of us at Cardozo think well of you and wish you the best.

Fuck these people and keep growing, you'll learn what you need to, God knows you are smart enough to get there. Be yourself. Find your way. Keep your head up. Most importantly, don't listen to the negativity. Good Luck.

Paul Perkins

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394023)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM
Author: Thriller Ceo

why are you responding to MY post, dipshit? i never said anything bad about the guy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394027)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:50 AM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park

Hey Paul - thanks for the warm wishes. It's good to hear from you and give my regards to the Cardozo crew! I miss you guys - drop me a line sometime!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394048)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM
Author: Garnet Trust Fund

Cardozo crew...OUCH!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394276)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park

?!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394296)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM
Author: Dashing Beta Nowag Abode

www.hallmark.com

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394299)





Date: March 24th, 2005 11:20 AM
Author: Glittery Azure Office Sex Offender

Hi David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395818)





Date: March 24th, 2005 6:00 PM
Author:  gas station boiling water
Subject: what I have learned from this thread

1. the future of the justice system will be in the hands of many childish, hateful misfits who have nothing better to do than attempt to destroy the self-esteem of an accomplished human being.

2. Posting enormous amounts of personal information online is an invariable risk and makes you vulnerable to such scrutiny.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398608)





Date: March 24th, 2005 6:57 PM
Author: cordovan hunting ground corner

why does his phone number have a seattle area code?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398956)





Date: April 21st, 2005 7:05 PM
Author: canary depressive property

Cell phone, I would assume.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2607210)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:08 AM
Author: Carmine library

probably

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046322)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:22 AM
Author: Appetizing bonkers box office

http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg

Now we all know what he does on his off time...

edit: http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG this too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046364)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:30 AM
Author: Appetizing bonkers box office

http://www.deshif.com/pix/P4130076.JPG

bwahahahaha. Funniest pic yet.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046404)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:08 PM
Author: purple institution
Subject: David Shifren

Hi, my name is Carol, and I've been friends with Dave since high school. Rather, he has been a good friend to me for almost the last 10 years, despite my immaturity throughout most of the time period. For a very long time, I was an utter douchebag who thought that popularity mattered and Dave was strange, so I wasn't a very good friend to him. (Dave, please consider this my official apology.)

Dave has stuck by me through thick and thin all of these years. He has been a thoughtful, kind, and generous friend and a great listener. He is an intelligent, patient person who gives without expecting anything in return from others. Whenever someone pokes fun at him, he takes it in stride and is never mean to the offending party. The rest of us can learn a lot from him.

More about me: Right now I'm in business school in the DC area. Usually I'm pretty normal and boring (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_1058.jpg ) but sometimes I can be silly and cool like Dave (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_0018.jpg ).

If any of you douchebags out there want to sling insults at me for defending my friend, feel free. Your puerile stupidity amuses me.

Carol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065652)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:09 PM
Author: Chrome flickering black woman

What STD's do you have?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065665)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:12 PM
Author: purple institution

Actually, it's very interesting that you ask this question. As a precaution, I get tested at least once every year. I just got my results back today and I've tested negative for all of the diseases. Unless you're counting intelligence as an STD. :)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065697)





Date: June 20th, 2005 6:17 PM
Author:  Kitty Cat Hell

Shut up.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3066750)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:10 PM
Author: misunderstood sneaky criminal

Eat shit and die.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065674)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:14 PM
Author: purple institution

Nice username!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065705)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:26 AM
Author:  poppy meetinghouse wrinkle

LOL BUMP

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4605993)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:29 AM
Author: Mint Arrogant Brunch

http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606008)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:36 AM
Author: bistre community account queen of the night

Ride 'em cowboy!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606038)





Date: December 19th, 2005 4:46 AM
Author:  Lemon Faggot Firefighter

"LEGAL EXPERIENCE

LeBoeuf, Lamb, Greene & MacRae LLP, New York, New York - Summer Associate, Summer 2005."

pwn3d

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606364)





Date: December 19th, 2005 9:11 PM
Author:  voyeur school cafeteria
Subject: "Education"

Duke University

nuff said.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4612748)





Date: December 19th, 2005 10:11 PM
Author: Insane emerald roast beef set

OH MY FUCKING GOD ALL MIGHTY!!!!! This has to be one of the best threads EVER! Still, after Davids response....he seems like a perfectly well adjusted, kind, if awkward feller. I for one support him despite his extreme lack of social skills. If you will allow me:

Life is tough, as tough can be

But David you can count on thee

to pull yourself from deep dispair

and rise above, and make it there

Your talents wide, and varied are

with a little hope, youll be a star

just make sure to love yourself

and lose some weight, if for your health

your wit is keen, and lsat high

your memory strong, you are not shy

your breast is large, to hold your heart

which beats in rhythm, it does its part

and despite what these losers say

nay never forget that though you may

display the douchbaggery most high and hard

you can allways play the lexis card



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4613300)





Date: December 20th, 2005 12:56 AM
Author:  effete public bath

rock on dave!

Also, did you guys notice he attended the Institute for Justice law student conference?

He's a libertarian to boot. I don't care what his persona is (which doesn't seem all that bad). If he uses his intellectual talents and ambitions to further the cause of liberty MORE POWER TO HIM.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4615203)





Date: December 20th, 2005 3:06 AM
Author: Cream bearded bbw field

Vicious satire is not 'hatred'. Teacher's pets have always been ridiculed, so no sympathy should be expected. . .

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4616610)





Date: December 20th, 2005 2:15 PM
Author:  magical temple

I've got one word.....HA

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619455)





Date: December 20th, 2005 2:37 PM
Author: copper blathering

In keeping with Penn's employed at graduation rate, he must be working at like 3 firms simultaneously by now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619677)





Date: January 16th, 2006 5:07 PM
Author: chestnut legal warrant
Subject: I saw this loser in Cancun

Over Christmas break I saw this loser dancing his fat ass off in a cancun nightclub (by himself of course). I even asked him was he a Penn law student to be sure, he asked "what have I done?" I said I was a 3L and recognized him. Meanwhile I had to come up with a lie so explain to my friends why I was talking to this loser.

I'll say this, the boy ain't shy...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4833722)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM
Author: Yellow quadroon

dp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838492)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM
Author: Yellow quadroon

The fact that he went to cancun by himself. And went to a bar by himself. And was dancing by himself makes 'shif very, very, prestigious.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838493)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:08 PM
Author: Scarlet legend trailer park
Subject: Must have missed...

You must have missed the fact that I was there with, oh, 40 or so friends. (I've been going to Cancun for 20 years, so I know a lot of people down there.) Nice try, though. And, if I recall correctly, I rebuffed your advance. I didn't mean to be hurtful, I just don't swing that way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839613)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:38 PM
Author: fishy fanboi

I'd like to stick that pudgy meathole of yours

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839810)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:40 PM
Author: Coiffed therapy

I admire this motherfucker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839818)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:56 AM
Author: jet-lagged flatulent toaster

He's got moxie. I'll give him that.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847351)





Date: January 17th, 2006 3:53 PM
Author: low-t affirmative action

LEBOUEFPWN3DDD!!!!111

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840902)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:44 AM
Author: chestnut legal warrant

I didn't notice the 40 friends, but I wasn't looking for them either.

I felt like I was in the presence of a celebrity. Lowly ole me watching DeShif groove on the corner of the stage. I thought DeShif only existed in my dreams. I was starstruck watching you move those meaty hips to the beat of the music. If only I had internet access that night my friends and I could have celebrated our chance encounter with xoxo royalty. Instead all I heard was "What the fuck are you doing talking to that guy." I even was going to take a photo of you with a couple of the girls we were with, but they were worried about you dripping sweat on them.

I do have a healthy measure of respect for DeShif, any dude willing to get up on the DJ stage and dance by himself is cool by me. You, Mr. DeShif, have enough balls for 8 normal men. I salute you.

By the way, there were a ton of young hotties there that night, I trust you did not go home alone.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847309)





Date: January 18th, 2006 11:50 AM
Author: comical pervert

you are frighteningly cool

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847625)





Date: January 18th, 2006 12:11 PM
Author: chestnut legal warrant

thats what I keep hearing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847775)





Date: January 18th, 2006 11:47 AM
Author:  disturbing multi-billionaire psychic

Awesome.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847612)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:09 PM
Author: Hideous kitty rigpig

You guys have problems. This guy seems fine. You guys, on the other hand, look pathetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840997)





Date: January 17th, 2006 6:49 PM
Author: stubborn lilac electric furnace wagecucks

whatever, this fat retarded dumbfuck is the kind of fat retarded dumbfuck that gives lawyers, republicans, Americans and white males a bad name.

Shockingly, this idiot hasn't even been compared to who he is most like. Even though, as I recall, there is a photo with him with the dude.

Karl Rove was close, but Rove at least is an architect, a strategic thinker that can assess avenues and devise tactics to negotiate them toward success.

This fat dumbass is more like Ken Starr than anyone else. His claim to fame: examining Bill Clintons spooge marks. This heeb is well on his way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842429)





Date: January 17th, 2006 7:06 PM
Author: Hideous kitty rigpig

Who are you talking about? That kid is just a law student. Where are you getting all this shit?

You have problems.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842563)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:54 AM
Author: comical pervert

he seems like a perfectly decent guy. and GTO -- our "director of educational services" -- ridiculing someone for credential puffery is ridiculously ironic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847345)





Date: March 5th, 2006 2:32 AM
Author: Amber bossy ratface

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251207)