\
  The most prestigious law school admissions discussion board in the world.
BackRefresh Options Favorite

Hilarious Penn Law student website/resume - Let's bash this TTT

Anyone here know this douche? http://www.deshif.com/
embarrassed to the bone goyim
  03/09/05
Wow... just wow. All that's missing is an LSAT score. # W...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
Now don't be jealous just because "message board addict...
hairraiser transparent roast beef
  06/18/05
he evidently was formally congratulated for 'oustanding acad...
Deep church fat ankles
  03/09/05
Hey, don't sell him short! He was also formally congratulate...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
That's the most TTT part of that whole travesty of a CV.
sickened coral mad-dog skullcap corn cake
  03/09/05
Have you considered that the resume people post on their per...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
go away, David
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
Dude the guy is in Cuba right now. See below.
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
but you also said you'll have internet access every day or t...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
PWN3D!!
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
Not really. Just because there is one civilized person on x...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
when i started HS i was a pretty big dork, and i got picked ...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
Actually from his schedule it looks like he's all booked. S...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
David, it's obviously you b/c no one else would be so persis...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
Dude the guy is in cuba on spring break. Give it a rest dic...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
Speaking of that, does he have treasury department clearance...
blue razzle-dazzle private investor
  03/09/05
I like you
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
I love you.
Low-t factory reset button nursing home
  03/24/05
who puts Mensa membership on a resume?!
black harsh water buffalo hissy fit
  03/09/05
Same guys who list Westlaw certification.
embarrassed to the bone goyim
  03/09/05
Correct.
Electric site hairy legs
  03/09/05
He says he was "featured" in Newsday, and then lin...
Stirring Newt Athletic Conference
  03/09/05
nice, not even a finalist.
Mustard Gaping Church Building
  03/09/05
and the onion "feature" is a photograph with a bun...
Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea
  03/09/05
Oh my God. I didn't know that there was an actual place call...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
...
poppy lay tank
  03/09/05
this is only relevant if something actually pans out....so i...
passionate turquoise giraffe
  03/09/05
i know, i thought it was just an expression until i stood at...
Seedy dashing abode electric furnace
  03/10/05
http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/gazetteer?city=hicksville&...
talented dopamine coffee pot
  03/11/05
Hicksville is full of smelly Indians. And now the Broadway ...
flirting step-uncle's house
  03/23/05
Check out the links in his recogintion section. Almost all o...
canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler
  03/09/05
Hey, at least we know he was in the Onion. Only thing more p...
crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal
  03/09/05
Let's not forget the prestige involved in working for Daddy ...
canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler
  03/09/05
Hey, this guy may be dorkey but he came by it honestly. Did...
Stubborn House
  03/11/05
Not to mention the fact that his appearance in the Onion fea...
hyperactive indecent set
  03/09/05
Was this all really true? I feel like it's some bizarre par...
mind-boggling aquamarine pit
  04/05/05
This is why there are so many self hating jews.
Smoky contagious toaster
  06/18/05
They actually used him for a photo shoot for the Onion when ...
arousing haunted graveyard useless brakes
  03/09/05
LOL http://www.deshif.com/onion.htm
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
classic
burgundy exciting depressive
  03/09/05
Someone should email this to everyone at upenn
silver indian lodge
  03/09/05
He's already pretty famous around here.
lemon nubile alpha
  03/09/05
Do share.
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
From what I've witnessed, he's very active and outspoken. Bu...
lemon nubile alpha
  03/09/05
Don't know him personally, but he caused quite a stir at the...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
http://www.dailypennsylvanian.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/0...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
LOL, good find.
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
I'm *sure* he takes advantage of the massages just because o...
Curious sapphire home becky
  03/09/05
is that abnormal? Those professor things go for a ton at the...
bistre principal's office
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
In case you ever want to get in touch with him, http://www.d...
crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal
  03/09/05
someone should IM him.
Stirring Newt Athletic Conference
  03/09/05
"Facilitated development of interpersonal and social sk...
Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag
  03/09/05
With such a schedule, how does he find time to bang all the ...
canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler
  03/09/05
VIRGIN
fishy meetinghouse
  03/09/05
You HAVE to read the Nikkei link. Who on earth would put a ...
Swashbuckling degenerate institution
  03/09/05
I wish Milk Chan was here. She could say this much better th...
canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler
  03/09/05
Oh Christ, I didn't even notice that: A pink slipper Davi...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
The MSNBC article is also about losing his dot-com job when ...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
Holy Shit. Nice find.
Mischievous Crackhouse Cuck
  01/17/06
With all of these lame hobbies, how does he find time for th...
Brass Plaza Party Of The First Part
  03/09/05
Oh, even the busiest person can find time for that. Um, I'v...
Swashbuckling degenerate institution
  03/09/05
Leboeuf is a good place to work. Seriously.
insanely creepy foreskin trust fund
  03/09/05
Ha... I guess that goes to show how much personality matters...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
I was actually being serious, I thought the people there wer...
insanely creepy foreskin trust fund
  03/09/05
Really? Very interesting.
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
Like I told you eariler, it's not just about vault rank. ...
insanely creepy foreskin trust fund
  03/09/05
he's still a douche if he makes 450K. hth
Racy drab base jew
  03/09/05
[Oh, fine. Guilt edit.]
poppy lay tank
  03/09/05
Did you guys catch this one: Keyboards/cowbell/lute: Capt...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
i GOTTA have more cowbell!
amber tanning salon
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
He's on the masthead of the Penn Law Review...this is really...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
"Cancun Hot Body '03 & '04"" I don't b...
multi-colored buck-toothed hell
  03/09/05
see the WHOIS i posted below his website was registered a...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
Yeah, unless he holds fat *exclusively* in his bean and nowh...
passionate turquoise giraffe
  03/09/05
he wants his loved ones to know what flights he's on in case...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
how did he get direct HAV-MIA flights?
narrow-minded ungodly mental disorder
  01/17/06
I actually know someone a lot like this in real life. These...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
Notice that this guy's resume is so douchey that no one is e...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
Oh, geez. Now I'm ashamed that I have something in common wi...
Cracking Rigor
  03/11/05
mental note: don't try to get job with Leboeuf in the fall
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
Looks legit to me, here is the WHOIS on his domain: Doma...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
is anyone a Duke alum here? they could write and ask him fo...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
NicoBlue is. They might have been in the same graduating cla...
Vibrant white box office goal in life
  03/09/05
The funniest part is how he lists his upcoming summer associ...
trip rose senate death wish
  03/09/05
scratch that - look at his calendar - he has all these chees...
trip rose senate death wish
  03/09/05
I think listing the summer associate position is fine -- it'...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
But for something that reeks of prestige, that's not exactly...
Orchid Psychic
  03/09/05
I think that someone called "HLSking" probably doe...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
This board is filled with many vicious people. Even "re...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
STFU
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
I hope you have a nice life being a dickhead.
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
it's been working pretty well for me so far. thanks.
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
HAHA, that was fucking beautiful
slap-happy balding police squad
  01/17/06
I did feel a little bad about it, yeah. Oh well.
poppy lay tank
  03/09/05
Same here. Too late. And anyway, posting a web site like tha...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
Correct.
ebony concupiscible national black woman
  03/09/05
Agreed. Not very nice.
Lime cerebral masturbator blood rage
  03/10/05
...
Shaky azn
  03/09/05
He might be mildly autistic.
Swashbuckling degenerate institution
  03/09/05
I don't think autistic people would stalk people though
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
This guy is a weirdo but its not his fault. You can't choos...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
Also, he is apparently a massive tool and faggot and all-aro...
blue razzle-dazzle private investor
  03/09/05
No doubt he is. But its still incredibly vicious to savage ...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
look out the window, Davey. it's a cruel world.
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
I understand it may be difficult for a dickhead like you to ...
fear-inspiring rehab potus
  03/09/05
Did you learn that during Westlaw certification?
blue razzle-dazzle private investor
  03/09/05
Nah, he learned it at Mensa.
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
absurd defense of a tool - check excessively logical styl...
mauve juggernaut menage
  03/09/05
...
narrow-minded ungodly mental disorder
  01/17/06
also, he defends himself on anonymous internet message board...
Onyx thriller windowlicker
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
"I think this guy is lucky he's a genius..." Wa...
Cracking Rigor
  03/11/05
Woah, that was him? The stalking rumor was circulating among...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
i doubt that there is a lurking xoxo reader that became so d...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
"he constantly raises his hand and has one of the worst...
Electric site hairy legs
  03/09/05
loser
Stubborn House
  03/11/05
::passes out in shock::
Painfully Honest Motley Philosopher-king Orchestra Pit
  03/11/05
This kid sounds like the equivalent of a 1L at Vanderbilt wh...
Vigorous temple hominid
  03/24/05
Isn't 'Shifren' a Jewish name? Jewish mafia, do something...
blue razzle-dazzle private investor
  03/09/05
Forget it, the Nikkei link alone is enough to excommunicate ...
Swashbuckling degenerate institution
  03/09/05
Uh, check out the Onion link. I think that is him in the sa...
Wonderful Obsidian Range International Law Enforcement Agency
  03/09/05
I'm surpised he didn't call it a "model shoot" on ...
comical underhanded stead
  03/09/05
This Deshif guy has proven to me that not only does God have...
mauve juggernaut menage
  03/09/05
What's the only part of his busy schedule he doesn't report ...
geriatric tripping locus
  03/09/05
I knew this guy at Duke - not well, but I took some classes ...
out-of-control knife
  03/09/05
Do you know anything about him stalking girls?
crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
LMAO, that is an awesome story.
Electric site hairy legs
  03/09/05
I was there too... Unfortunately, what dickcheese posted was...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
what was the expression of the profs face?
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
She wasn't there, she just donated the item. Dunno what her ...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
am i the only one that thinks he'll show up and introduce hi...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
well played!
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
Edit: I'm starting to feel bad.
Laughsome godawful shrine bbw
  03/09/05
...
Glassy Business Firm
  03/09/05
I think he emceed my Bar Mitzvah.
Swashbuckling degenerate institution
  03/09/05
LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!! Unbelievable, simply unbelievable... Fro...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
what does it take to graduate 'near' the top of your class a...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
I dunno about that, but it must be pretty damn hard to becom...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
his son is obviously a better web designer and goes to a muc...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
Eh, after seeing DeShif.com Penn doesn't feel very prestigio...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
...
Glassy Business Firm
  03/09/05
Link from above: http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/
crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal
  03/09/05
Damn that's funny. I love the guy's pic on the right. Wh...
Sexy space
  03/23/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
initially i thought that reading this would do him some good...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/09/05
Yeah, there's no way that he can't *not* know what people th...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
"enlighten on the one hand or emotionally distrubed on ...
Stubborn House
  03/11/05
He probably googles himself on a regular basis. If xoxo thr...
Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag
  03/10/05
It's not very "Bush team leader" of him to travel ...
Hilarious Round Eye
  03/09/05
That website made me feel ashamed to be a Republican.
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/09/05
As if the GOP had oodles of dignity in the first place.
Glassy Business Firm
  03/09/05
172
crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal
  03/09/05
I feel the same way. I was really hoping he'd be a wacko lib...
Cracking Rigor
  03/11/05
$1000 vegas
nofapping lilac location
  03/09/05
i dont get it, why would anyone want to read his schedule an...
Tan spectacular stage
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
strict scrutiny: he'safag
adventurous mewling point hunting ground
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
ROFL
Massive Telephone
  06/18/05
i know the entire family pretty well, though i'm certainly n...
flesh crusty prole ceo
  03/09/05
we dont need to take it from you, we've got his life story o...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
Taking shit from what?
Laughsome godawful shrine bbw
  03/09/05
from peers. likely due to stuttering and social awkwardness...
flesh crusty prole ceo
  03/09/05
I know a guy who is a severe stutterer and he was well liked...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
Listen, this guy brings shit upon himself by creating a webs...
Stubborn House
  03/11/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
surely you jest?
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/09/05
Is Burbank around this year? I wouldn't want him to get shot...
vengeful stimulating property boistinker
  03/09/05
if he really plans to blow away some kids at school im sure ...
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/09/05
hahahahah 1fucking80
adventurous mewling point hunting ground
  03/10/05
A+
talented dopamine coffee pot
  03/10/05
This reminds me of the good 'ol days of XOXO.
duck-like cruel-hearted gaming laptop
  03/09/05
-
Sticky Gas Station Messiness
  03/09/05
Holy Crap, it's David Shifren!
light fanboi spot
  03/10/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/10/05
nice!
orange elastic band resort
  03/10/05
I find it strange that this kid's apparently a big ol' feder...
bateful twisted bawdyhouse
  03/10/05
You are such asses. I met this guy a couple of weeks ago, a...
Bearded Umber New Version Cuckold
  03/10/05
Aren't you supposed to go to YLS?
multi-colored buck-toothed hell
  03/10/05
HI DAVID
very tactful hideous immigrant
  03/05/06
As soon as he finds out about all of this he's definitely ad...
avocado high-end sanctuary chad
  03/10/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/10/05
Wow. I thought UVA's republican nerdy guy who everbody knows...
Boyish Domesticated Really Tough Guy
  03/10/05
Oh, and whether there was any doubt that this is really him ...
Boyish Domesticated Really Tough Guy
  03/10/05
Whats with the magician pictures?
trip rose senate death wish
  03/10/05
What's with the AOL address? At least DeShif got his own dom...
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/10/05
This person is a classic example of why all schools should R...
silver indian lodge
  03/10/05
lmao...wow. really. wow. nobody else puts MIDDLE SCHOOL or s...
Filthy hospital
  03/10/05
I cant believe
Irradiated weed whacker mad cow disease
  03/10/05
You guys, I am a NATIONAL AP SCHOLAR WITH DISTINCTION and I ...
Impressive soggy heaven
  03/10/05
How'd that paper go?
talented dopamine coffee pot
  03/10/05
I just had to turn in the proposal (four pages plus prelimin...
Impressive soggy heaven
  03/11/05
That's an interesting typo. GL.
talented dopamine coffee pot
  03/11/05
I will chalk that up to midterms, and also my TTTness.
Impressive soggy heaven
  03/11/05
It's cool. Yours was an easy question, really; harder has b...
talented dopamine coffee pot
  03/11/05
Their desire to sleep with members of the adcomm. That's ...
Impressive soggy heaven
  03/11/05
check out the link to his father's law firm... http://mem...
Navy native
  03/10/05
Like father, like son...their webdesign skills are AWFUL.
Disturbing Judgmental Office
  06/18/05
You guys are just jealous... My resume is more prestigous th...
Razzmatazz incel piazza
  03/10/05
yeah...that's it
Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag
  03/10/05
thanks man, I spent 10 minutes reading this post in class, t...
Splenetic Garrison Pistol
  03/10/05
I'm not going to make fun of this guy because he's just embl...
Fighting turdskin travel guidebook
  03/10/05
You think Shitren carries business cards with him?
180 Bespoke Personal Credit Line
  03/10/05
i suspect they would be 'business binders'
abnormal school cafeteria
  03/10/05
LOL. THIS GUY IS A FAGGOT. I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE CLASSES WI...
maize rigpig forum
  03/10/05
i'm surprised to see people bashing LeBoeuf
Seedy dashing abode electric furnace
  03/10/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/10/05
Well, they did hire this douchebag.
wine adulterous stage sound barrier
  03/10/05
...
Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth
  03/10/05
I feel bad for the poor guy. So he is a big nerd and he is a...
excitant dilemma
  03/11/05
You're a dolt. By voluntarily making the details of his lif...
Charismatic University
  03/11/05
bump
Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat
  03/23/05
Thanks. I forgot about this.
floppy state
  03/23/05
I love it - I can't get enough of it
Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat
  03/23/05
check out his pic w/ Ari Fleischer on his website. Edit...
provocative self-centered pozpig
  03/23/05
"Hello 911...There is a douchebag harrasing Judge Jones...
walnut corner
  03/23/05
Damn, the one on the right of the judge is hot.
Beta pearly library halford
  03/23/05
Probably spent 2 hours rounding up that many women - only to...
Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat
  03/23/05
Every time I start feeling bad about this thread I think abo...
provocative self-centered pozpig
  03/23/05
LOOK AT THE MANTITTIES ON THAT TOOL!
Unholy market legend
  03/23/05
are you sure?
Swollen public bath associate
  03/23/05
The Goat has been violated :(
Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration
  03/23/05
...
slimy hairless theatre indirect expression
  03/23/05
wow
dull outnumbered den crotch
  03/23/05
Yes I know, In fact it's on my resume.
Razzmatazz incel piazza
  03/23/05
I checked - I don't see it on the main page. Is it in Appen...
Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat
  03/23/05
LMFAO
provocative self-centered pozpig
  03/23/05
Oh man, I think I've passed his father's law practice in Hic...
flirting step-uncle's house
  03/23/05
Nope
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/23/05
...
beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard
  03/24/05
Not personally.
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/24/05
Do you know me?
Low-t factory reset button nursing home
  03/24/05
Nope. Should I?
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/24/05
Yes.
Low-t factory reset button nursing home
  03/24/05
Or, rather, do I?
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/24/05
Computer Science
self-absorbed overrated brunch striped hyena
  03/23/05
I'm touched...
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/23/05
i like you
rough-skinned shitlib
  03/23/05
youve got a pair my friend. welcome to the insanity.
Spruce Ape
  03/24/05
Dear Mr. Shifren, Upon examining your resume, my advisors...
Scarlet cruise ship feces
  03/24/05
"Please update your resume's "Recognition" se...
dun zippy reading party
  03/24/05
*bows* I have racked up two 180's tonight. This is unprec...
Scarlet cruise ship feces
  03/24/05
a truly stirring moment of prestigiousness
learning disabled lodge
  03/24/05
Hey douchebag, I actually found this funny. Well done. Fi...
mint razzle organic girlfriend
  03/24/05
Thanks for the vote of confidence- I just had to work out th...
Scarlet cruise ship feces
  03/24/05
176
Bright titillating headpube locale
  03/24/05
You sound pretty nice.
Laughsome godawful shrine bbw
  03/24/05
please grow up
Exhilarant casino
  03/24/05
This douche misspelled "university" on his TTTSHIT...
cerise cocky hall doctorate
  03/23/05
Doh!
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/23/05
be nice, he's a really nice, smart guy. just dorky. he was...
Marvelous Cream Trailer Park
  03/23/05
Did you ever play spit and shove?
insane parlor
  03/24/05
holy shit -- you know him?
learning disabled lodge
  03/24/05
You're all fucked.
demanding sex offender
  03/24/05
why are you responding to MY post, dipshit? i never said any...
learning disabled lodge
  03/24/05
Hey Paul - thanks for the warm wishes. It's good to hear fr...
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/24/05
Cardozo crew...OUCH!
cerise cocky hall doctorate
  03/24/05
?!
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  03/24/05
www.hallmark.com
Low-t factory reset button nursing home
  03/24/05
Hi David.
dun zippy reading party
  03/24/05
what I have learned from this thread
Odious jap preventive strike
  03/24/05
why does his phone number have a seattle area code?
saffron theater stage
  03/24/05
Cell phone, I would assume.
Big Field Multi-billionaire
  04/21/05
probably
Yellow Friendly Grandma School
  06/18/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg Now we all know what he...
Disturbing Judgmental Office
  06/18/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/P4130076.JPG bwahahahaha. Funni...
Disturbing Judgmental Office
  06/18/05
David Shifren
Appetizing pisswyrm area
  06/20/05
What STD's do you have?
gay son of senegal chapel
  06/20/05
Actually, it's very interesting that you ask this question. ...
Appetizing pisswyrm area
  06/20/05
Shut up.
Vermilion supple parlour pocket flask
  06/20/05
Eat shit and die.
Charismatic University
  06/20/05
Nice username!
Appetizing pisswyrm area
  06/20/05
LOL BUMP
Primrose Shivering Ladyboy Kitty
  12/19/05
http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG
autistic wagecucks sandwich
  12/19/05
Ride 'em cowboy!
Apoplectic place of business address
  12/19/05
"LEGAL EXPERIENCE LeBoeuf, Lamb, Greene & MacRae...
bonkers theater fortuitous meteor
  12/19/05
"Education"
Greedy slate love of her life
  12/19/05
OH MY FUCKING GOD ALL MIGHTY!!!!! This has to be one of the ...
Plum Medicated Community Account
  12/19/05
rock on dave! Also, did you guys notice he attended the I...
azure stag film clown
  12/20/05
Vicious satire is not 'hatred'. Teacher's pets have always b...
glittery bat-shit-crazy center
  12/20/05
I've got one word.....HA
Vivacious mother
  12/20/05
In keeping with Penn's employed at graduation rate, he must ...
cordovan
  12/20/05
I saw this loser in Cancun
Heady bronze idea he suggested
  01/16/06
dp
Pink dog poop
  01/17/06
The fact that he went to cancun by himself. And went to a ba...
Pink dog poop
  01/17/06
Must have missed...
Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
  01/17/06
I'd like to stick that pudgy meathole of yours
Sepia Lascivious Jewess Roommate
  01/17/06
I admire this motherfucker
olive background story coldplay fan
  01/17/06
He's got moxie. I'll give him that.
Rebellious Topaz
  01/18/06
LEBOUEFPWN3DDD!!!!111
aromatic affirmative action
  01/17/06
I didn't notice the 40 friends, but I wasn't looking for the...
Heady bronze idea he suggested
  01/18/06
you are frighteningly cool
Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea
  01/18/06
thats what I keep hearing.
Heady bronze idea he suggested
  01/18/06
Awesome.
disrespectful translucent persian
  01/18/06
You guys have problems. This guy seems fine. You guys, on th...
charcoal tantric patrolman
  01/17/06
whatever, this fat retarded dumbfuck is the kind of fat reta...
slap-happy balding police squad
  01/17/06
Who are you talking about? That kid is just a law student. W...
charcoal tantric patrolman
  01/17/06
he seems like a perfectly decent guy. and GTO -- our "...
Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea
  01/18/06
bump
brindle keepsake machete
  03/05/06


Poast new message in this thread





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:18 PM
Author: embarrassed to the bone goyim

Anyone here know this douche?

http://www.deshif.com/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295847)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:20 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Wow... just wow. All that's missing is an LSAT score.

# Westlaw Certifications: Advanced Case Law, Advanced Statutory Research, Litigation, International Law, Patent, Trademark, Tax.

# LexisNexis Mastery Certifications: Federal Litigation, Federal Tax, Corporate and Securities, International Law, IP, Environmental Law.

Awarded junior class standing upon matriculation based on advanced high school coursework.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295863)





Date: June 18th, 2005 10:35 AM
Author: hairraiser transparent roast beef

Now don't be jealous just because "message board addict" is not elite.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047039)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:21 PM
Author: Deep church fat ankles

he evidently was formally congratulated for 'oustanding academic achievement' by alfonse d'amato.

if that's not prestige, then nothing is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295868)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Hey, don't sell him short! He was also formally congratulated by

* Nassau County Executive Thomas Gulotta.

* Suffolk County Executive Robert Gaffney.

* U.S. Congressman Gary Ackerman.

* New York State Senate President Pro Tem and Majority Leader Ralph Marino.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295887)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: sickened coral mad-dog skullcap corn cake

That's the most TTT part of that whole travesty of a CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296054)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

Have you considered that the resume people post on their personal website is different from their "real" resume that they use for employment purposes?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296894)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:30 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

go away, David

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296912)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

Dude the guy is in Cuba right now. See below.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296933)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

but you also said you'll have internet access every day or two, David. and I doubt you're rocking out w/ the social events.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296941)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

PWN3D!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296961)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

Not really. Just because there is one civilized person on xoxo who would come to this guy's defense doesn't mean its actually him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296967)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:47 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

when i started HS i was a pretty big dork, and i got picked on big time, and righfully so. it really sucked at the time, but im glad people were 'uncivil' to me, because it was only going to be worse at the next level unless i started becoming a little more self-aware of my social image. good, bad, right, wrong - that is just the way it is. you can stick up for this kid (or defend yourself if you are him), but the fact is, we are doing him (you) a favor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297073)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

Actually from his schedule it looks like he's all booked. Sorry dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296966)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:39 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

David, it's obviously you b/c no one else would be so persistent and call us naughty names out of nowhere. and I totally don't even recognize your moniker.

also allow me take this opportunity to tell you that my LS is more prestigious than yours, David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296990)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

Dude the guy is in cuba on spring break. Give it a rest dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297028)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM
Author: blue razzle-dazzle private investor

Speaking of that, does he have treasury department clearance? We should notify the treasury department just in case.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297039)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:46 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

I like you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297057)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:12 AM
Author: Low-t factory reset button nursing home

I love you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394226)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:24 PM
Author: black harsh water buffalo hissy fit

who puts Mensa membership on a resume?!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295902)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: embarrassed to the bone goyim

Same guys who list Westlaw certification.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295920)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:20 PM
Author: Electric site hairy legs

Correct.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297372)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: Stirring Newt Athletic Conference

He says he was "featured" in Newsday, and then links to a blurb listing a bunch of local national merit scholar semi-finalists from 1997. Excellent stuff.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295918)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM
Author: Mustard Gaping Church Building

nice, not even a finalist.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295950)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:52 PM
Author: Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea

and the onion "feature" is a photograph with a bunch of people seemingly chosen because they exude douchebaggery.

every law school has one of these guys. what's most amazing here is that the list of achievements is so long without even one of them being at all impresive. and "westlaw certification" is bizarre. that's like saying you have a driver's license.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298538)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

Oh my God. I didn't know that there was an actual place called "Hicksville," but apparently, there is.

My friend's bf is on law review at Penn...I'll have to ask about this dude.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295922)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM
Author: poppy lay tank



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296222)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:06 PM
Author: passionate turquoise giraffe

this is only relevant if something actually pans out....so i'll keep my bashing quiet til then.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296271)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:18 PM
Author: Seedy dashing abode electric furnace

i know, i thought it was just an expression until i stood at penn station and read the flashing signs for the long island railroad.

apparently hicksville girls wear white jeans and have really big bangs, though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303157)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM
Author: talented dopamine coffee pot

http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/gazetteer?city=hicksville&state=&zip=

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308455)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:22 PM
Author: flirting step-uncle's house

Hicksville is full of smelly Indians. And now the Broadway Mall has a Wal-Mart, too. Truly a TTT town.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391094)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler

Check out the links in his recogintion section. Almost all of them are bad links. That oozes prestige.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295934)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:29 PM
Author: crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal

Hey, at least we know he was in the Onion. Only thing more prestigious than that is being in Leiter.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295948)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler

Let's not forget the prestige involved in working for Daddy for the last 8 years.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295975)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:36 PM
Author: Stubborn House

Hey, this guy may be dorkey but he came by it honestly. Did you see the link to his father's website. Oh, and check out the link to Greater New York Mensa. The pictures of these losers will keep you laughing for a long, long time.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308258)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:20 PM
Author: hyperactive indecent set

Not to mention the fact that his appearance in the Onion featured him getting mocked for being a huge goddamn dork. Prestige in spades.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297888)





Date: April 5th, 2005 6:09 PM
Author: mind-boggling aquamarine pit

Was this all really true? I feel like it's some bizarre part of the space-time continuum, but I can't help but laugh as I read the whole thing....

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2492350)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:13 AM
Author: Smoky contagious toaster

This is why there are so many self hating jews.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046335)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM
Author: arousing haunted graveyard useless brakes

They actually used him for a photo shoot for the Onion when they needed a picture of a douche. Superb.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295894)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:25 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

LOL

http://www.deshif.com/onion.htm

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295909)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM
Author: burgundy exciting depressive

classic

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295960)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: silver indian lodge

Someone should email this to everyone at upenn

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295937)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM
Author: lemon nubile alpha

He's already pretty famous around here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295962)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

Do share.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295982)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM
Author: lemon nubile alpha

From what I've witnessed, he's very active and outspoken. But I don't know him personally.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295992)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:37 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Don't know him personally, but he caused quite a stir at the EJF auction a couple of weeks ago when he bid almost $1000 for picnic with a young/popular professor.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296010)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:40 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

http://www.dailypennsylvanian.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/09/22/4151207d44b7f

Goodness, his grades come up in an article about massages?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296031)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

LOL, good find.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296049)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:48 PM
Author: Curious sapphire home becky

I'm *sure* he takes advantage of the massages just because of stress during exams. Probably his only outlet for flesh-on-flesh contact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296094)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:14 PM
Author: bistre principal's office

is that abnormal? Those professor things go for a ton at the CLF auction here.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296767)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:17 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297339)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:42 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297533)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM
Author: crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal

In case you ever want to get in touch with him, http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295938)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM
Author: Stirring Newt Athletic Conference

someone should IM him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295972)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM
Author: Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag

"Facilitated development of interpersonal and social skills through interaction with elderly psychiatric patients"

OMG. We all puff our resumes a bit, but come on! This shit's embarrassing to read.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295978)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM
Author: canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler

With such a schedule, how does he find time to bang all the hot chicks I'm sure are beating down his door?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295990)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:42 PM
Author: fishy meetinghouse

VIRGIN

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296045)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM
Author: Swashbuckling degenerate institution

You HAVE to read the Nikkei link. Who on earth would put a story about being fired on their resume?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296051)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: canary aphrodisiac kitchen deer antler

I wish Milk Chan was here. She could say this much better than I can - "YOU DUMBASS!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296073)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Oh Christ, I didn't even notice that:

A pink slipper David Shifren, software engineer, was laid off from a newly built telecommunication company in November just two weeks after he was hired. "I do want to work for a IT-related company again," says Shifren, who talked to four recruiters at the party that night. "But next one must be a place where I can get a decent training."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296076)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

The MSNBC article is also about losing his dot-com job when the company was "NASDAQ'd" -- not something I think I'd want to advertise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296161)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:01 AM
Author: Mischievous Crackhouse Cuck

Holy Shit. Nice find.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838464)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM
Author: Brass Plaza Party Of The First Part

With all of these lame hobbies, how does he find time for the most important facet of his existence: furtively masturbating to TeenPeople for hours at a time?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296066)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:53 PM
Author: Swashbuckling degenerate institution

Oh, even the busiest person can find time for that. Um, I've heard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296131)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:47 PM
Author: insanely creepy foreskin trust fund

Leboeuf is a good place to work. Seriously.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296088)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Ha... I guess that goes to show how much personality matters, when good grades and law review only gets you LeBoeuf.

However, the fact that even he can make $125k should show how well Penn places ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296163)





Date: March 9th, 2005 5:59 PM
Author: insanely creepy foreskin trust fund

I was actually being serious, I thought the people there were better than people I met elsewhere.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296185)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Really? Very interesting.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296199)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM
Author: insanely creepy foreskin trust fund

Like I told you eariler, it's not just about vault rank.

*edit* however since guy is working there, my opinion is going to drop.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296233)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM
Author: Racy drab base jew

he's still a douche if he makes 450K.

hth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296237)





Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM
Author: poppy lay tank

[Oh, fine. Guilt edit.]

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296235)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:02 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

Did you guys catch this one:

Keyboards/cowbell/lute: Captain Buzzkill & the Bringdowns

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296676)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:03 PM
Author: amber tanning salon

i GOTTA have more cowbell!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296685)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:05 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296695)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

He's on the masthead of the Penn Law Review...this is really, really elaborate if someone is just making fun of him. That doesn't make sense.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296703)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:07 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296712)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM
Author: multi-colored buck-toothed hell

"Cancun Hot Body '03 & '04""

I don't believe it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296751)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

see the WHOIS i posted below

his website was registered about 2 years ago, that means someone would have to hack his domain to put that stuff up there and i cant believe anyone would put that much effort into a prank

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296826)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:24 PM
Author: passionate turquoise giraffe

Yeah, unless he holds fat *exclusively* in his bean and nowhere else, that's just not happening.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296861)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:15 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

he wants his loved ones to know what flights he's on in case a plane goes down. covering his bases. how sweet. I'm sure everyone cares.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296779)





Date: January 17th, 2006 11:01 AM
Author: narrow-minded ungodly mental disorder

how did he get direct HAV-MIA flights?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838942)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:13 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

I actually know someone a lot like this in real life. These people exist. Every two months I get a listserved email update that's 20 pages long --and I'm pretty sure unless you're Batman or something no one has 20 pages worth in 2 months

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296759)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

Notice that this guy's resume is so douchey that no one is even talking about how fat and ugly he is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296701)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296704)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:47 PM
Author: Cracking Rigor

Oh, geez. Now I'm ashamed that I have something in common with him.

It was basically a fricking EMAIL LIST.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308377)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:10 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

mental note: don't try to get job with Leboeuf in the fall

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296732)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:11 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

Looks legit to me, here is the WHOIS on his domain:

Domain: deshif.com

Registrant

David Shifren

deshif@optonline.net

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.1111111111

Administrative

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

Billing

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

Technical

David Shifren

DEShif

deshif@deshif.com

25 West 13th Street

New York, NY 10011 US

+1.2063500531

+1.2063500531 (FAX)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296744)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296748)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:16 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

is anyone a Duke alum here? they could write and ask him for advice or something

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296794)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: Vibrant white box office goal in life

NicoBlue is. They might have been in the same graduating class.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297655)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:19 PM
Author: trip rose senate death wish

The funniest part is how he lists his upcoming summer associate position under his experiences.

After that, its his schedule that takes the cake. This guy is so damn self important that he has to post his class schedule online!!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296814)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM
Author: trip rose senate death wish

scratch that - look at his calendar - he has all these cheesy singles or whatever meeting listed as if he has something to do. So sad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296825)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:22 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

I think listing the summer associate position is fine -- it's the advice the HLS OCS would give any 2L.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296834)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:26 PM
Author: Orchid Psychic

But for something that reeks of prestige, that's not exactly the most prestigous of firms.

And nobody cares what Harvard would do, you cunt.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296877)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

I think that someone called "HLSking" probably does care, and that's who I was talking to, genius.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297144)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

This board is filled with many vicious people. Even "respected" posters like rk982 and hanna jumped on the bully bandwagon. Pathetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296882)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

STFU

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296884)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

I hope you have a nice life being a dickhead.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296949)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

it's been working pretty well for me so far. thanks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296962)





Date: January 17th, 2006 6:19 PM
Author: slap-happy balding police squad

HAHA, that was fucking beautiful

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842140)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:42 PM
Author: poppy lay tank

I did feel a little bad about it, yeah. Oh well.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297018)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

Same here. Too late. And anyway, posting a web site like that is the virtual equivalent of going on reality TV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297151)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: ebony concupiscible national black woman

Correct.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297707)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:24 AM
Author: Lime cerebral masturbator blood rage

Agreed. Not very nice.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300443)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM
Author: Shaky azn
Subject: THE SCHIFREN STORY



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296903)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM
Author: Swashbuckling degenerate institution

He might be mildly autistic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296939)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

I don't think autistic people would stalk people though

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296951)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:41 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

This guy is a weirdo but its not his fault. You can't choose the way you are born or how you talk. If anyone else here was born with all the hurdles that this guy apparantly has, I guarantee they would have rolled over and given up. Personally, I think this guy is lucky he's a genius because god knows he isn't getting by on his looks or by being a smooth talker. If he has to interview aggressively because he is a social weirdo, more power to him for going after what he wants. As for talking in class, tons of people do that, he only gets picked on because he is ugly and has a stutter.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297014)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM
Author: blue razzle-dazzle private investor

Also, he is apparently a massive tool and faggot and all-around loser.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297033)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

No doubt he is. But its still incredibly vicious to savage a stranger on an internet board like this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297050)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:49 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

look out the window, Davey. it's a cruel world.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297087)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:52 PM
Author: fear-inspiring rehab potus

I understand it may be difficult for a dickhead like you to understand that nice people exist. I assure you that just because a random poster takes the opposite side from you in an argument doesn't mean that poster must be the subject of the debate.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297113)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM
Author: blue razzle-dazzle private investor

Did you learn that during Westlaw certification?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297259)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:12 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Nah, he learned it at Mensa.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297309)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:07 PM
Author: mauve juggernaut menage

absurd defense of a tool - check

excessively logical style of argumentation - check

egregious self-promotion ("nice guy") - check

use of the phrase "subject of the debate" - check

Hi David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297274)





Date: January 17th, 2006 11:07 AM
Author: narrow-minded ungodly mental disorder



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838964)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM
Author: Onyx thriller windowlicker

also, he defends himself on anonymous internet message boards. and unconvincingly might I add.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297052)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:11 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297302)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:51 PM
Author: Cracking Rigor

"I think this guy is lucky he's a genius..."

Wait, back up. How do we know he's a genius? The Mensa membership? National Merit Finalist? The years working for his father? What?

I've seen absolutely no evidence of that?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308401)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:01 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Woah, that was him? The stalking rumor was circulating among 1Ls early in the term but I didn't know it was about him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297215)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:04 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

i doubt that there is a lurking xoxo reader that became so disgusted that they would come to this guy's defense

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297248)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM
Author: Electric site hairy legs

"he constantly raises his hand and has one of the worst speech impediments ive ever heard. it often takes him minutes to get out a word becuase of his stuttering problem."

Holy shit, I think I sat in on a Con Law class at Penn last year with this dude. It was the day he was called on. I was stunned.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297493)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:53 PM
Author: Stubborn House
Subject: loser

This guy is the next David Berkowitz/Son of Sam. Mark my words and watch and see!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308418)





Date: March 11th, 2005 9:34 PM
Author: Painfully Honest Motley Philosopher-king Orchestra Pit
Subject: ::passes out in shock::

Oh my god. It's like the three most annoying people I know combined into one.

My sympathies to all at Penn.

At some level I feel bad for the guy, clearly teased a lot early on in life and is compensating a hell of a lot to make up for it. Unfortunately this compensation only leads to more ridiculing for being a total weirdo.

On another level, we've all been made fun of in life. And plenty of people do not turn into completely socially inept people because of it. In fact, sometimes the most well adjusted people I know where teased a lot in grade school. So that's no excuse.

And frankly, on a personal level, I have been the recipient of strange creepy guys hitting on me and it's no fun. So if he's stalking people I have a serious problem with that.

Reasons not to attend Penn...:-p

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2311750)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:46 AM
Author: Vigorous temple hominid

This kid sounds like the equivalent of a 1L at Vanderbilt who is often referred to as "the dragon."

edit: but with more tact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394021)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM
Author: blue razzle-dazzle private investor

Isn't 'Shifren' a Jewish name?

Jewish mafia, do something about this!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296932)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: Swashbuckling degenerate institution

Forget it, the Nikkei link alone is enough to excommunicate him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297445)





Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM
Author: Wonderful Obsidian Range International Law Enforcement Agency

Uh, check out the Onion link. I think that is him in the satin shirt. LOL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297046)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: comical underhanded stead

I'm surpised he didn't call it a "model shoot" on his CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297694)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM
Author: mauve juggernaut menage

This Deshif guy has proven to me that not only does God have a sense of humor, He's actually a cynical bastard. Keep up the good work, oh Lord of Heaven.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297258)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:19 PM
Author: geriatric tripping locus

What's the only part of his busy schedule he doesn't report here: http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm ??

His weekly NAMBLA meetings. Look at this picture: http://www.deshif.com/david.jpg He'd be perfect in NRA-style "I am NAMBLA" advertisements.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297359)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:24 PM
Author: out-of-control knife

I knew this guy at Duke - not well, but I took some classes with him and majored in a similar, overlapping field.

There are two types of nerds: those who are quiet, nice-guy nerds (with whom I have no problem, and often befriend, even) and those who are aggressive, obnoxious, arrogant nerds (e.g. Bill Gates). This guy is in the second class.

It's kind of TTT to do this to the poor guy, though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297401)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal

Do you know anything about him stalking girls?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297439)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297457)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:33 PM
Author: Electric site hairy legs

LMAO, that is an awesome story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297469)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

I was there too... Unfortunately, what dickcheese posted was 100% accurate.

You just had to see it... He literally jumped out of his seat and was standing in front of the auctioneer waving his paddle around and around. It was insane.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297489)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:38 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

what was the expression of the profs face?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297504)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

She wasn't there, she just donated the item. Dunno what her reaction to this is, but like dickcheese said above, I'd be pretty freaked out. I don't even know if DeShif is going to bring 3 people with him or if he's just going to go alone with her.

The audience was laughing, but it was very uneasy... I mean, it's kind of like how a lot of people reacted to the J cutting herself thing from that xo thread the other day... The whole situation was pretty funny but when you realize that he isn't playing and is 100% serious, it kind of freaks you out after the fact.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297529)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

am i the only one that thinks he'll show up and introduce his three imaginary best friends

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297542)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297557)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

well played!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297660)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297692)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:28 PM
Author: Laughsome godawful shrine bbw

Edit:

I'm starting to feel bad.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297429)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM
Author: Glassy Business Firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297440)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM
Author: Swashbuckling degenerate institution

I think he emceed my Bar Mitzvah.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297455)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:32 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!

Unbelievable, simply unbelievable... From the tux, to the U.S. Supreme Court bar, to the AOL URL...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297465)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

what does it take to graduate 'near' the top of your class at Fordham?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297531)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:45 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

I dunno about that, but it must be pretty damn hard to become an adjunct professor of law at the local community college.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297561)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:48 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

his son is obviously a better web designer and goes to a much more prestigious law school. i wonder what shif sr. must be like in real life.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297587)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:51 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Eh, after seeing DeShif.com Penn doesn't feel very prestigious anymore :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297610)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297654)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297547)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: Glassy Business Firm



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297631)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:58 PM
Author: crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal

Link from above:

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297688)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:36 PM
Author: Sexy space

Damn that's funny.

I love the guy's pic on the right. What a fag.

This confirms it: douchebaggery is genetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391196)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297558)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

initially i thought that reading this would do him some good. (as i posted above, i was a pretty big dork in HS, simply because i was just so unaware of social norms and my social image. getting picked on honestly did wonders for my life since then)

but in my experience there are just some kids that dont get it and dont care. the type of guys that you might invite to sit with you at lunch or invite out for a beer just to make an effort to include them, but they turn out to be even weirder than you expected. the guy obviously enjoys his life and is proud of his accomplishments. i cant imagine him reading this thread and being enlightened on the one hand or emotionally hurt on the other.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297623)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297647)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:24 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

Yeah, there's no way that he can't *not* know what people think of him here. He probably doesn't care or loves it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298364)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:04 PM
Author: Stubborn House

"enlighten on the one hand or emotionally distrubed on the other". Are you kidding? This guy is going to update his resume/CV to include this link to show how much people are talking about him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308523)





Date: March 10th, 2005 9:32 AM
Author: Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag

He probably googles himself on a regular basis. If xoxo threads turn up in google, he'll find it himself.

I just googled him on my own, and he's listed as the treasurer of the Golden Key at Hunter. 2003.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300319)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:50 PM
Author: Hilarious Round Eye

It's not very "Bush team leader" of him to travel to red Cuba and spend his Euros there!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297607)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

That website made me feel ashamed to be a Republican.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297622)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:57 PM
Author: Glassy Business Firm

As if the GOP had oodles of dignity in the first place.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297666)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM
Author: crystalline circlehead sneaky criminal

172

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297706)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:02 PM
Author: Cracking Rigor

I feel the same way. I was really hoping he'd be a wacko liberal.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308498)





Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM
Author: nofapping lilac location

$1000 vegas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297648)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:44 PM
Author: Tan spectacular stage

i dont get it, why would anyone want to read his schedule and calendar? what is the purpose of having that shit on his website? The resume is one thing, but why do i need to know where he is every second of every single day?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298093)





Date: March 9th, 2005 9:55 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298193)





Date: March 9th, 2005 10:47 PM
Author: adventurous mewling point hunting ground

strict scrutiny: he'safag

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298507)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:22 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298729)





Date: June 18th, 2005 10:22 AM
Author: Massive Telephone

ROFL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047023)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:25 PM
Author: flesh crusty prole ceo

i know the entire family pretty well, though i'm certainly not friends with david.

give him a break. he's been taking shit his whole life.

and don't bring the dad into it. shitty website or not, take it from me, the guy's pretty fucking successful.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298755)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:31 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

we dont need to take it from you, we've got his life story on a website

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298787)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: Laughsome godawful shrine bbw

Taking shit from what?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298793)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:35 PM
Author: flesh crusty prole ceo

from peers. likely due to stuttering and social awkwardness, as well as his looks. he might be annoying as all hell in large groups, but he's a pretty nice guy otherwise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298815)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

I know a guy who is a severe stutterer and he was well liked and successful at HYS -- he was on law review and ended up at a top-5 NY firm. Law school may look like high school, but it's not.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298893)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:14 PM
Author: Stubborn House

Listen, this guy brings shit upon himself by creating a website like and by out-biding himself for a picnic. If he get's picked on because of his actions, it's his own fault.

I actually started to feel sorry for this guy until I read his sense of self importance. There are likeable nerds but this guy isn't one of them. So, if he gets picked on... oh well. That said, he'll probably have the last laugh after he explodes and goes postal on all of us.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308609)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298802)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:36 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

surely you jest?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298823)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:38 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298842)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:40 PM
Author: vengeful stimulating property boistinker

Is Burbank around this year? I wouldn't want him to get shot.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298864)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:41 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

if he really plans to blow away some kids at school im sure he'll update his calendar online before he does it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298872)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:10 AM
Author: adventurous mewling point hunting ground

hahahahah 1fucking80

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299424)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:55 PM
Author: talented dopamine coffee pot

A+

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300946)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM
Author: duck-like cruel-hearted gaming laptop

This reminds me of the good 'ol days of XOXO.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298899)





Date: March 9th, 2005 11:48 PM
Author: Sticky Gas Station Messiness

-

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298916)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:52 AM
Author: light fanboi spot
Subject: Holy Crap, it's David Shifren!

I went to college with this guy. He was notorious on campus for being the biggest nerd at the entire school. I can't say I really ever talked to him, but he was a total tool.

1. I know of at least two girls that had to get restraining orders against him because he stalked them. He would wait outside their dorms for them every day, all day. No social graces, couldn't figure out that just because a girl smiled at you in class does not make her your new best friend.

2. I saw him on Halloween one year wearing a cheerleading outfit. Keep in mind, he's at least 70 pounds overweight. And he wasn't the funny fat kid in a group of friends doing it to be funny. It was very creepy.

3. As others have noted, he's the arrogant, aggressive, supernerd. We all hated him.

4. I don't know if he got kicked out of school for stalking, but it certainly wouldn't surprise me. His picture isn't in the class yearbook, and he's not listed in the online alumni directory.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299290)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:29 AM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299554)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:12 AM
Author: orange elastic band resort

nice!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299840)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:38 AM
Author: bateful twisted bawdyhouse

I find it strange that this kid's apparently a big ol' federalist but is also in "journal of law and social change" (sounds liberal) and STREET LAW.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300222)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:13 AM
Author: Bearded Umber New Version Cuckold

You are such asses. I met this guy a couple of weeks ago, and he seems fine in real life. Give him a break.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300239)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:28 AM
Author: multi-colored buck-toothed hell

Aren't you supposed to go to YLS?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300450)





Date: March 5th, 2006 2:36 AM
Author: very tactful hideous immigrant

HI DAVID

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251259)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:26 AM
Author: avocado high-end sanctuary chad

As soon as he finds out about all of this he's definitely adding "The Most Prestigious Admissions Board in the World" to the "featured in" section of his CV.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300243)





Date: March 10th, 2005 11:36 AM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300735)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:33 AM
Author: Boyish Domesticated Really Tough Guy

Wow. I thought UVA's republican nerdy guy who everbody knows who has a website was sort of toolish, but he looks like Miles Davis compared to Mr. Shif.

I don't know why I posted this, as I won't say who the UVA guy is, so don't bother asking.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300245)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:56 AM
Author: Boyish Domesticated Really Tough Guy

Oh, and whether there was any doubt that this is really him putting up the site, well, I think it runs in the family

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300257)





Date: March 10th, 2005 1:15 PM
Author: trip rose senate death wish

Whats with the magician pictures?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301101)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:25 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

What's with the AOL address? At least DeShif got his own domain name.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302842)





Date: March 10th, 2005 8:38 AM
Author: silver indian lodge

This person is a classic example of why all schools should REQUIRE interviews before offering admission.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300268)





Date: March 10th, 2005 8:51 AM
Author: Filthy hospital

lmao...wow. really. wow. nobody else puts MIDDLE SCHOOL or sophomore year of high school "honors" on their stuff, right? and is a link to "Spanish" in "Proficient in Spanish - verbal and written communication" really necessary?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300278)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:43 AM
Author: Irradiated weed whacker mad cow disease
Subject: I cant believe

Im sorry... I'm really still in disbelief that people like this actually exist. What happens to them? ARe these the kind of people who become famously successful? I have to assume no way... but I actually think his resume is preety fucking prestigious.

Nonetheless, I'm sure he scores in the bottom 10th percentile on all standardized social skill tests. He reminds me of that guy in office space, milton.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300493)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:56 AM
Author: Impressive soggy heaven

You guys, I am a NATIONAL AP SCHOLAR WITH DISTINCTION and I didn't put that anywhere in my applications. Am I screwed?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300549)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:57 PM
Author: talented dopamine coffee pot

How'd that paper go?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300958)





Date: March 11th, 2005 12:35 PM
Author: Impressive soggy heaven

I just had to turn in the proposal (four pages plus preliminary bibliography) and he ate it up, gave me an A, and said it is a wonderful and unique topic.

I can only assume that Peen Law Review is in my future, but seriously, thanks. ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2307844)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:56 PM
Author: talented dopamine coffee pot

That's an interesting typo.

GL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308444)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM
Author: Impressive soggy heaven

I will chalk that up to midterms, and also my TTTness.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308451)





Date: March 11th, 2005 1:58 PM
Author: talented dopamine coffee pot

It's cool. Yours was an easy question, really; harder has been answering the "What should I write my college essay about?" questions (I teach high school, if you didn't already know that)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308465)





Date: March 11th, 2005 2:26 PM
Author: Impressive soggy heaven

Their desire to sleep with members of the adcomm.

That's what I wrote my law one on. ;)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308720)





Date: March 10th, 2005 11:09 AM
Author: Navy native

check out the link to his father's law firm...

http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/

who puts a picture of themselves like that up on their professional site.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300609)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:35 AM
Author: Disturbing Judgmental Office

Like father, like son...their webdesign skills are AWFUL.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046420)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:30 PM
Author: Razzmatazz incel piazza

You guys are just jealous... My resume is more prestigous than yours, my father is more presitgous than yours, and the girl that I stalk and will one day be my girlfriend is more prestigous than your girlfriend.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300788)





Date: March 10th, 2005 12:43 PM
Author: Soul-stirring know-it-all nowag

yeah...that's it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300847)





Date: March 10th, 2005 4:01 PM
Author: Splenetic Garrison Pistol

thanks man, I spent 10 minutes reading this post in class, then you post this, I lose my shit and starting laughing out loud in Con Law. Luckily, the teacher did not say anything.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301861)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:31 PM
Author: Fighting turdskin travel guidebook

I'm not going to make fun of this guy because he's just emblematic of the Republican Party (David Shifren = New School Karl Rove) and Long Island as a whole.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301466)





Date: March 10th, 2005 2:49 PM
Author: 180 Bespoke Personal Credit Line

You think Shitren carries business cards with him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301563)





Date: March 10th, 2005 6:36 PM
Author: abnormal school cafeteria

i suspect they would be 'business binders'

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302913)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:24 PM
Author: maize rigpig forum

LOL. THIS GUY IS A FAGGOT. I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE CLASSES WITH HIM THOUGH. NON STOP COMEDY EVERY DAY. LOL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303187)





Date: March 10th, 2005 7:32 PM
Author: Seedy dashing abode electric furnace

i'm surprised to see people bashing LeBoeuf

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303231)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:33 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304313)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:34 PM
Author: wine adulterous stage sound barrier

Well, they did hire this douchebag.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304326)





Date: March 10th, 2005 10:39 PM
Author: Histrionic violet scourge upon the earth



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304370)





Date: March 11th, 2005 10:42 PM
Author: excitant dilemma

I feel bad for the poor guy. So he is a big nerd and he is annoying. I get it.

I would be mortified if I went on the internet and read hundreds of messages making fun of me. No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are. I say it's time to call off the hounds.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2312190)





Date: March 11th, 2005 10:46 PM
Author: Charismatic University

You're a dolt. By voluntarily making the details of his life visible to all, he has thoroughly forfeited any entitlement to pity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2312228)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:26 PM
Author: Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388651)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:31 PM
Author: floppy state

Thanks. I forgot about this.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388684)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:40 PM
Author: Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat

I love it - I can't get enough of it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388752)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 4:25 PM
Author: provocative self-centered pozpig

check out his pic w/ Ari Fleischer on his website.

Edit: Is that real silk? http://www.deshif.com/pix/ARI.JPG

(probably right after meeting Ari: riding the goat - http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2389187)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:00 PM
Author: walnut corner

"Hello 911...There is a douchebag harrasing Judge Jones and some of her interns..."

http://www.deshif.com/pix/BSJ1.JPG

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2389993)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: Beta pearly library halford

Damn, the one on the right of the judge is hot.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390003)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM
Author: Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat

Probably spent 2 hours rounding up that many women - only to have his shot ruined by another male in the background.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390007)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:17 PM
Author: provocative self-centered pozpig

Every time I start feeling bad about this thread I think about the past two presidential elections. The fact that I feel bad at all is the problem. Democrats need to learn to be heartless a$$holes. Might as well learn by practicing on Republicans. (NOTE: I do like Christine Todd Whitman, but I'm pretty sure she isn't a real Republican).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390098)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:24 PM
Author: Unholy market legend

LOOK AT THE MANTITTIES ON THAT TOOL!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391100)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:47 PM
Author: Swollen public bath associate
Subject: are you sure?

Ombudsman,

Please view this picture that he VOLUNTARILY posted on his website: http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg (and recently mentioned above)...

Do you still contend that "No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are."



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390332)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM
Author: Galvanic effete faggotry internal respiration

The Goat has been violated :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390340)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:27 PM
Author: slimy hairless theatre indirect expression



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391123)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM
Author: dull outnumbered den crotch
Subject: wow

does this poor guy even know he's getting totally owned on xoxo by now? somebody must have told him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390345)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:53 PM
Author: Razzmatazz incel piazza

Yes I know, In fact it's on my resume.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390375)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:55 PM
Author: Diverse lavender ticket booth toilet seat

I checked - I don't see it on the main page. Is it in Appendix C?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390389)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 10:18 PM
Author: provocative self-centered pozpig

LMFAO

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391927)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:47 PM
Author: flirting step-uncle's house

Oh man, I think I've passed his father's law practice in Hicksville. The one I'm thinking of has its phone number in huge gold numbers on the front of the building, so I'll have to pay more attention the next time I pass it. It's right near where LILCO was, so I think that could be it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391312)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:52 PM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
Subject: Nope

That's Dominic Barbara's practice. My father's practice used to be down the road from there but no longer is.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392841)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:54 AM
Author: beady-eyed ruby digit ratio gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394077)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:57 AM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface

Not personally.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394103)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:11 AM
Author: Low-t factory reset button nursing home

Do you know me?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394220)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:14 AM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface

Nope. Should I?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394245)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM
Author: Low-t factory reset button nursing home

Yes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394273)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:19 AM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface

Or, rather, do I?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394301)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:48 PM
Author: self-absorbed overrated brunch striped hyena
Subject: Computer Science

When I first saw that photo, I thought to myself "computer science." Then I scrolled down the page and . . .

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391320)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:30 PM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
Subject: I'm touched...

... that everyone seems to find my site so hilarious.

1. Yes, the site is real. I'm real. And I'm really DEShif himself. (To prove it's me, here's the IM I got from Jim Adler: Mr Jim Adler (7:12:27 PM): You seriously have got to be the biggest tool I have ever come across in my life. Your resume is pathetic and the fact that you list the things that you do on your away message is just sad.)

2. Neither "xeris" nor "David Shifren" are me. I just found about this forum (and, indeed, this site) tonight when someone posted to my site's forum.

3. The story about my bidding for $950 for picnic with Struve is true. I did have a group lined up (although not at that price). And it has nothing to do with her looks or gender and everything to do with market competition. You may recall I also bought events with Profs. Roosevelt, Persily, Parchomovsky, and Prichett (all male). The only reason I spent $950 for this one was because a group of 1Ls bid up to $900.

4. The rumors about expulsion from Duke, restraining orders, or any stalking at all are utterly untrue. Ask the admissions office if you don't believe me - they've seen my records.

5. The photo of Judge Jones' chambers really are the clerks and interns. At the time it was taken, I was the only male in the office. And, no, that's not why I took the job!

6. Yes, the hot body championships are true. And, yes, I won them despite (or perhaps due to?) my being fat and ugly.

7. This online resume isn't the same as my actual, paper resume. That one is one page and omits almost all of the minor things which are on the online resume. This one is much more comprehensive and (perhaps exhaustively) detailed.

8. Finally, the purpose behind the event calendar and schedule is twofold: first, for my own convenience - I don't have a PDA and secondly, because my friends (yes, I do have friends!) sometimes use it to see what's going on, what classes I'm taking, or when I'm free.

9. The Cuba trip was legal (and quite fun) - I had Treasury Dept. permission through the law school to conduct academic research.

10. Finally, despite what many on the board have speculated, I am neither gay nor a virgin (although, admittedly, I am single). And, in response to your next question, I've never used a prostitute.

Let me know if you have any other questions. :)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392604)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:32 PM
Author: rough-skinned shitlib

i like you

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392631)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:17 AM
Author: Spruce Ape

youve got a pair my friend. welcome to the insanity.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393135)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:29 AM
Author: Scarlet cruise ship feces

Dear Mr. Shifren,

Upon examining your resume, my advisors and I have concluded that I am more prestigious than you. While you have achieved some prestigiousness in your day, you simply do not rival the glorious elitism that is 174. HTH.

Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition.

Feel free to ask for advice if you ever need help not being a TTT.

Gloriously elite,

174

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393269)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:45 AM
Author: dun zippy reading party

"Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition"

Yes. 180.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393429)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:47 AM
Author: Scarlet cruise ship feces

*bows*

I have racked up two 180's tonight. This is unprecedented.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393449)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:28 AM
Author: learning disabled lodge

a truly stirring moment of prestigiousness

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393893)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:43 AM
Author: mint razzle organic girlfriend

Hey douchebag,

I actually found this funny. Well done. Finally youre getting the hang of utilizing your schtick in an effective manner. Keep it up, and Ill refrain from embarassing you.

Hugs and Kisses,

YOUREANIDIOT

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394007)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:36 AM
Author: Scarlet cruise ship feces

Thanks for the vote of confidence- I just had to work out the kinks.

I sure am glad you're done "embarassing" me!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394464)





Date: March 24th, 2005 11:27 AM
Author: Bright titillating headpube locale

176

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395868)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:35 AM
Author: Laughsome godawful shrine bbw

You sound pretty nice.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393946)





Date: March 24th, 2005 5:12 PM
Author: Exhilarant casino
Subject: please grow up

Greetings.

Making fun of others is fine. We all do it.

It is extremely cowardly, however, to do so anonymously, hiding behind the cloak of a website.

Thus, I present a real, working email address:

adamspamguard-autoadmit@yahoo.com

[Of course, this is a temporary address, I can keep it as long (or short) as I want. But for now it goes straight to my inbox]

Anyway. I strongly recommend that many of you think long and hard about your desire and readiness for law school. These types of baseless attacks simply are not welcome within these halls.

If nothing else, please do not come to Penn. You won't fit in and we won't accept these types of attitudes and behaviors.

And in the future, if you have something to say, please at least attach a name and email.

--Adam

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398319)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:33 PM
Author: cerise cocky hall doctorate

This douche misspelled "university" on his TTTSHITEATINGFAGGOT resume!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392639)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:47 PM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
Subject: Doh!

Wow, how embarrassing! Thanks for letting me know! I'll fix it right away! (Good thing this isn't the resume I send to employers!)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392798)





Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:48 PM
Author: Marvelous Cream Trailer Park

be nice, he's a really nice, smart guy. just dorky. he was in my freshman dorm.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392806)





Date: March 24th, 2005 12:12 AM
Author: insane parlor

Did you ever play spit and shove?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393083)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:29 AM
Author: learning disabled lodge

holy shit -- you know him?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393896)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM
Author: demanding sex offender
Subject: You're all fucked.

I know David from another school he went to. Yes, he sat in the front and raised his hand, and yes he would often annoy the teacher, and yes it took him a little while to get his words out and yes he was akward with girls and akward in general.

However, he has a good heart. He is a good guy. He is never mean, always positive and if he comes off arrogant sometimes, well re-read the aforegoing posts and ask yourself why someone who is constantly made fun of might act like that. I wasn't his best friend, or really knew him, but someone told me of this post today and we all talked about why it was sad that there were so many immature children who could not be supportive of those around them who might be challenged in one way or another. Maybe sometimes people paint targets on themselves, but who are we to hurl shit at them.

I wish David the best of luck. I think he should, if he is reading this, understand that people are jealous, in the case of these posts, it pervades their comments, and finally David, all of us at Cardozo think well of you and wish you the best.

Fuck these people and keep growing, you'll learn what you need to, God knows you are smart enough to get there. Be yourself. Find your way. Keep your head up. Most importantly, don't listen to the negativity. Good Luck.

Paul Perkins

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394023)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM
Author: learning disabled lodge

why are you responding to MY post, dipshit? i never said anything bad about the guy.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394027)





Date: March 24th, 2005 1:50 AM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface

Hey Paul - thanks for the warm wishes. It's good to hear from you and give my regards to the Cardozo crew! I miss you guys - drop me a line sometime!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394048)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM
Author: cerise cocky hall doctorate

Cardozo crew...OUCH!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394276)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface

?!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394296)





Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM
Author: Low-t factory reset button nursing home

www.hallmark.com

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394299)





Date: March 24th, 2005 11:20 AM
Author: dun zippy reading party

Hi David.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395818)





Date: March 24th, 2005 6:00 PM
Author: Odious jap preventive strike
Subject: what I have learned from this thread

1. the future of the justice system will be in the hands of many childish, hateful misfits who have nothing better to do than attempt to destroy the self-esteem of an accomplished human being.

2. Posting enormous amounts of personal information online is an invariable risk and makes you vulnerable to such scrutiny.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398608)





Date: March 24th, 2005 6:57 PM
Author: saffron theater stage

why does his phone number have a seattle area code?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398956)





Date: April 21st, 2005 7:05 PM
Author: Big Field Multi-billionaire

Cell phone, I would assume.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2607210)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:08 AM
Author: Yellow Friendly Grandma School

probably

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046322)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:22 AM
Author: Disturbing Judgmental Office

http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg

Now we all know what he does on his off time...

edit: http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG this too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046364)





Date: June 18th, 2005 2:30 AM
Author: Disturbing Judgmental Office

http://www.deshif.com/pix/P4130076.JPG

bwahahahaha. Funniest pic yet.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046404)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:08 PM
Author: Appetizing pisswyrm area
Subject: David Shifren

Hi, my name is Carol, and I've been friends with Dave since high school. Rather, he has been a good friend to me for almost the last 10 years, despite my immaturity throughout most of the time period. For a very long time, I was an utter douchebag who thought that popularity mattered and Dave was strange, so I wasn't a very good friend to him. (Dave, please consider this my official apology.)

Dave has stuck by me through thick and thin all of these years. He has been a thoughtful, kind, and generous friend and a great listener. He is an intelligent, patient person who gives without expecting anything in return from others. Whenever someone pokes fun at him, he takes it in stride and is never mean to the offending party. The rest of us can learn a lot from him.

More about me: Right now I'm in business school in the DC area. Usually I'm pretty normal and boring (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_1058.jpg ) but sometimes I can be silly and cool like Dave (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_0018.jpg ).

If any of you douchebags out there want to sling insults at me for defending my friend, feel free. Your puerile stupidity amuses me.

Carol

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065652)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:09 PM
Author: gay son of senegal chapel

What STD's do you have?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065665)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:12 PM
Author: Appetizing pisswyrm area

Actually, it's very interesting that you ask this question. As a precaution, I get tested at least once every year. I just got my results back today and I've tested negative for all of the diseases. Unless you're counting intelligence as an STD. :)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065697)





Date: June 20th, 2005 6:17 PM
Author: Vermilion supple parlour pocket flask

Shut up.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3066750)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:10 PM
Author: Charismatic University

Eat shit and die.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065674)





Date: June 20th, 2005 4:14 PM
Author: Appetizing pisswyrm area

Nice username!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065705)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:26 AM
Author: Primrose Shivering Ladyboy Kitty

LOL BUMP

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4605993)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:29 AM
Author: autistic wagecucks sandwich

http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606008)





Date: December 19th, 2005 3:36 AM
Author: Apoplectic place of business address

Ride 'em cowboy!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606038)





Date: December 19th, 2005 4:46 AM
Author: bonkers theater fortuitous meteor

"LEGAL EXPERIENCE

LeBoeuf, Lamb, Greene & MacRae LLP, New York, New York - Summer Associate, Summer 2005."

pwn3d

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606364)





Date: December 19th, 2005 9:11 PM
Author: Greedy slate love of her life
Subject: "Education"

Duke University

nuff said.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4612748)





Date: December 19th, 2005 10:11 PM
Author: Plum Medicated Community Account

OH MY FUCKING GOD ALL MIGHTY!!!!! This has to be one of the best threads EVER! Still, after Davids response....he seems like a perfectly well adjusted, kind, if awkward feller. I for one support him despite his extreme lack of social skills. If you will allow me:

Life is tough, as tough can be

But David you can count on thee

to pull yourself from deep dispair

and rise above, and make it there

Your talents wide, and varied are

with a little hope, youll be a star

just make sure to love yourself

and lose some weight, if for your health

your wit is keen, and lsat high

your memory strong, you are not shy

your breast is large, to hold your heart

which beats in rhythm, it does its part

and despite what these losers say

nay never forget that though you may

display the douchbaggery most high and hard

you can allways play the lexis card



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4613300)





Date: December 20th, 2005 12:56 AM
Author: azure stag film clown

rock on dave!

Also, did you guys notice he attended the Institute for Justice law student conference?

He's a libertarian to boot. I don't care what his persona is (which doesn't seem all that bad). If he uses his intellectual talents and ambitions to further the cause of liberty MORE POWER TO HIM.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4615203)





Date: December 20th, 2005 3:06 AM
Author: glittery bat-shit-crazy center

Vicious satire is not 'hatred'. Teacher's pets have always been ridiculed, so no sympathy should be expected. . .

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4616610)





Date: December 20th, 2005 2:15 PM
Author: Vivacious mother

I've got one word.....HA

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619455)





Date: December 20th, 2005 2:37 PM
Author: cordovan

In keeping with Penn's employed at graduation rate, he must be working at like 3 firms simultaneously by now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619677)





Date: January 16th, 2006 5:07 PM
Author: Heady bronze idea he suggested
Subject: I saw this loser in Cancun

Over Christmas break I saw this loser dancing his fat ass off in a cancun nightclub (by himself of course). I even asked him was he a Penn law student to be sure, he asked "what have I done?" I said I was a 3L and recognized him. Meanwhile I had to come up with a lie so explain to my friends why I was talking to this loser.

I'll say this, the boy ain't shy...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4833722)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM
Author: Pink dog poop

dp

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838492)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM
Author: Pink dog poop

The fact that he went to cancun by himself. And went to a bar by himself. And was dancing by himself makes 'shif very, very, prestigious.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838493)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:08 PM
Author: Fragrant Jet Whorehouse Ratface
Subject: Must have missed...

You must have missed the fact that I was there with, oh, 40 or so friends. (I've been going to Cancun for 20 years, so I know a lot of people down there.) Nice try, though. And, if I recall correctly, I rebuffed your advance. I didn't mean to be hurtful, I just don't swing that way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839613)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:38 PM
Author: Sepia Lascivious Jewess Roommate

I'd like to stick that pudgy meathole of yours

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839810)





Date: January 17th, 2006 1:40 PM
Author: olive background story coldplay fan

I admire this motherfucker

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839818)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:56 AM
Author: Rebellious Topaz

He's got moxie. I'll give him that.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847351)





Date: January 17th, 2006 3:53 PM
Author: aromatic affirmative action

LEBOUEFPWN3DDD!!!!111

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840902)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:44 AM
Author: Heady bronze idea he suggested

I didn't notice the 40 friends, but I wasn't looking for them either.

I felt like I was in the presence of a celebrity. Lowly ole me watching DeShif groove on the corner of the stage. I thought DeShif only existed in my dreams. I was starstruck watching you move those meaty hips to the beat of the music. If only I had internet access that night my friends and I could have celebrated our chance encounter with xoxo royalty. Instead all I heard was "What the fuck are you doing talking to that guy." I even was going to take a photo of you with a couple of the girls we were with, but they were worried about you dripping sweat on them.

I do have a healthy measure of respect for DeShif, any dude willing to get up on the DJ stage and dance by himself is cool by me. You, Mr. DeShif, have enough balls for 8 normal men. I salute you.

By the way, there were a ton of young hotties there that night, I trust you did not go home alone.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847309)





Date: January 18th, 2006 11:50 AM
Author: Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea

you are frighteningly cool

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847625)





Date: January 18th, 2006 12:11 PM
Author: Heady bronze idea he suggested

thats what I keep hearing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847775)





Date: January 18th, 2006 11:47 AM
Author: disrespectful translucent persian

Awesome.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847612)





Date: January 17th, 2006 4:09 PM
Author: charcoal tantric patrolman

You guys have problems. This guy seems fine. You guys, on the other hand, look pathetic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840997)





Date: January 17th, 2006 6:49 PM
Author: slap-happy balding police squad

whatever, this fat retarded dumbfuck is the kind of fat retarded dumbfuck that gives lawyers, republicans, Americans and white males a bad name.

Shockingly, this idiot hasn't even been compared to who he is most like. Even though, as I recall, there is a photo with him with the dude.

Karl Rove was close, but Rove at least is an architect, a strategic thinker that can assess avenues and devise tactics to negotiate them toward success.

This fat dumbass is more like Ken Starr than anyone else. His claim to fame: examining Bill Clintons spooge marks. This heeb is well on his way.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842429)





Date: January 17th, 2006 7:06 PM
Author: charcoal tantric patrolman

Who are you talking about? That kid is just a law student. Where are you getting all this shit?

You have problems.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842563)





Date: January 18th, 2006 10:54 AM
Author: Misanthropic Station Marketing Idea

he seems like a perfectly decent guy. and GTO -- our "director of educational services" -- ridiculing someone for credential puffery is ridiculously ironic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847345)





Date: March 5th, 2006 2:32 AM
Author:  brindle keepsake machete

bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251207)