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Hilarious Penn Law student website/resume - Let's bash this TTT
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:18 PM Author: Costumed crackhouse liquid oxygen Anyone here know this douche?
http://www.deshif.com/ |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:20 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Wow... just wow. All that's missing is an LSAT score.
# Westlaw Certifications: Advanced Case Law, Advanced Statutory Research, Litigation, International Law, Patent, Trademark, Tax. # LexisNexis Mastery Certifications: Federal Litigation, Federal Tax, Corporate and Securities, International Law, IP, Environmental Law.
Awarded junior class standing upon matriculation based on advanced high school coursework. |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 10:35 AM Author: Khaki house Now don't be jealous just because "message board addict" is not elite. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047039) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:21 PM Author: soul-stirring church he evidently was formally congratulated for 'oustanding academic achievement' by alfonse d'amato.
if that's not prestige, then nothing is. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Hey, don't sell him short! He was also formally congratulated by
* Nassau County Executive Thomas Gulotta. * Suffolk County Executive Robert Gaffney. * U.S. Congressman Gary Ackerman. * New York State Senate President Pro Tem and Majority Leader Ralph Marino. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM Author: Hairless New Version That's the most TTT part of that whole travesty of a CV. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296054) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine Have you considered that the resume people post on their personal website is different from their "real" resume that they use for employment purposes? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296894) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:30 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat go away, David (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296912) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine Dude the guy is in Cuba right now. See below. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296933) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat but you also said you'll have internet access every day or two, David. and I doubt you're rocking out w/ the social events. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296941) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse PWN3D!! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296961) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine Not really. Just because there is one civilized person on xoxo who would come to this guy's defense doesn't mean its actually him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296967) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:47 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse when i started HS i was a pretty big dork, and i got picked on big time, and righfully so. it really sucked at the time, but im glad people were 'uncivil' to me, because it was only going to be worse at the next level unless i started becoming a little more self-aware of my social image. good, bad, right, wrong - that is just the way it is. you can stick up for this kid (or defend yourself if you are him), but the fact is, we are doing him (you) a favor. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297073) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:36 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine Actually from his schedule it looks like he's all booked. Sorry dickhead. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296966) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:39 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat David, it's obviously you b/c no one else would be so persistent and call us naughty names out of nowhere. and I totally don't even recognize your moniker.
also allow me take this opportunity to tell you that my LS is more prestigious than yours, David. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine Dude the guy is in cuba on spring break. Give it a rest dickhead. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297028) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM Author: Metal Idea He Suggested Speaking of that, does he have treasury department clearance? We should notify the treasury department just in case. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297039) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:46 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat I like you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297057) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:12 AM Author: navy laughsome travel guidebook lettuce I love you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394226) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:24 PM Author: plum mildly autistic tattoo theater who puts Mensa membership on a resume?! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295902) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM Author: Costumed crackhouse liquid oxygen Same guys who list Westlaw certification. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295920) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:20 PM Author: Hairraiser school Correct. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297372) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM Author: Mustard Contagious Twinkling Uncleanness Fanboi He says he was "featured" in Newsday, and then links to a blurb listing a bunch of local national merit scholar semi-finalists from 1997. Excellent stuff. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295918) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM Author: Abusive obsidian nowag nice, not even a finalist. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295950) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 10:52 PM Author: Lemon stimulating juggernaut gay wizard and the onion "feature" is a photograph with a bunch of people seemingly chosen because they exude douchebaggery.
every law school has one of these guys. what's most amazing here is that the list of achievements is so long without even one of them being at all impresive. and "westlaw certification" is bizarre. that's like saying you have a driver's license. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:26 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground Oh my God. I didn't know that there was an actual place called "Hicksville," but apparently, there is.
My friend's bf is on law review at Penn...I'll have to ask about this dude. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM Author: Stirring library (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296222) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:06 PM Author: Big Bright Ceo Hominid this is only relevant if something actually pans out....so i'll keep my bashing quiet til then. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296271) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:18 PM Author: concupiscible milky incel i know, i thought it was just an expression until i stood at penn station and read the flashing signs for the long island railroad.
apparently hicksville girls wear white jeans and have really big bangs, though |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM Author: Vengeful Overrated Coffee Pot Tanning Salon http://www.census.gov/cgi-bin/gazetteer?city=hicksville&state=&zip= (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308455) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:22 PM Author: bateful impressive market boltzmann Hicksville is full of smelly Indians. And now the Broadway Mall has a Wal-Mart, too. Truly a TTT town. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391094) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM Author: flirting spot Check out the links in his recogintion section. Almost all of them are bad links. That oozes prestige. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295934) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:29 PM Author: Trip up-to-no-good coldplay fan church building Hey, at least we know he was in the Onion. Only thing more prestigious than that is being in Leiter. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295948) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM Author: flirting spot Let's not forget the prestige involved in working for Daddy for the last 8 years. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295975) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:36 PM Author: boyish step-uncle's house Hey, this guy may be dorkey but he came by it honestly. Did you see the link to his father's website. Oh, and check out the link to Greater New York Mensa. The pictures of these losers will keep you laughing for a long, long time. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308258) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 9:20 PM Author: Razzle business firm mediation Not to mention the fact that his appearance in the Onion featured him getting mocked for being a huge goddamn dork. Prestige in spades. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297888) |
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Date: April 5th, 2005 6:09 PM Author: floppy generalized bond Was this all really true? I feel like it's some bizarre part of the space-time continuum, but I can't help but laugh as I read the whole thing.... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2492350) |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 2:13 AM Author: white appetizing old irish cottage This is why there are so many self hating jews. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046335) |
Date: March 9th, 2005 5:23 PM Author: buck-toothed disturbing base factory reset button They actually used him for a photo shoot for the Onion when they needed a picture of a douche. Superb. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295894) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:25 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location LOL
http://www.deshif.com/onion.htm |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:30 PM Author: bat-shit-crazy crystalline love of her life classic (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295960) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM Author: mind-boggling box office Someone should email this to everyone at upenn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295937) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM Author: sepia range ape He's already pretty famous around here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295962) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground Do share. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295982) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM Author: sepia range ape From what I've witnessed, he's very active and outspoken. But I don't know him personally. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295992) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:37 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Don't know him personally, but he caused quite a stir at the EJF auction a couple of weeks ago when he bid almost $1000 for picnic with a young/popular professor. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296010) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:40 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground http://www.dailypennsylvanian.com/vnews/display.v/ART/2004/09/22/4151207d44b7f
Goodness, his grades come up in an article about massages? |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location LOL, good find. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296049) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:48 PM Author: gay useless brakes nursing home I'm *sure* he takes advantage of the massages just because of stress during exams. Probably his only outlet for flesh-on-flesh contact. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296094) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:14 PM Author: Godawful jade point kitty is that abnormal? Those professor things go for a ton at the CLF auction here. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296767) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:17 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297339) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:42 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297533) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:28 PM Author: Trip up-to-no-good coldplay fan church building In case you ever want to get in touch with him, http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295938) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:31 PM Author: Mustard Contagious Twinkling Uncleanness Fanboi someone should IM him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295972) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:32 PM Author: bisexual giraffe "Facilitated development of interpersonal and social skills through interaction with elderly psychiatric patients"
OMG. We all puff our resumes a bit, but come on! This shit's embarrassing to read. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:34 PM Author: flirting spot With such a schedule, how does he find time to bang all the hot chicks I'm sure are beating down his door? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2295990) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:42 PM Author: Lascivious indirect expression VIRGIN (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296045) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:43 PM Author: Underhanded idiot You HAVE to read the Nikkei link. Who on earth would put a story about being fired on their resume? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296051) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM Author: flirting spot I wish Milk Chan was here. She could say this much better than I can - "YOU DUMBASS!" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296073) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Oh Christ, I didn't even notice that:
A pink slipper David Shifren, software engineer, was laid off from a newly built telecommunication company in November just two weeks after he was hired. "I do want to work for a IT-related company again," says Shifren, who talked to four recruiters at the party that night. "But next one must be a place where I can get a decent training." |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground The MSNBC article is also about losing his dot-com job when the company was "NASDAQ'd" -- not something I think I'd want to advertise. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296161) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 4:01 AM Author: fluffy twinkling orchestra pit Holy Shit. Nice find. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838464) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:45 PM Author: Brilliant dingle berry With all of these lame hobbies, how does he find time for the most important facet of his existence: furtively masturbating to TeenPeople for hours at a time? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296066) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:53 PM Author: Underhanded idiot Oh, even the busiest person can find time for that. Um, I've heard. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296131) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:47 PM Author: submissive site electric furnace Leboeuf is a good place to work. Seriously. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296088) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:56 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Ha... I guess that goes to show how much personality matters, when good grades and law review only gets you LeBoeuf.
However, the fact that even he can make $125k should show how well Penn places ;) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 5:59 PM Author: submissive site electric furnace I was actually being serious, I thought the people there were better than people I met elsewhere. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296185) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:01 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Really? Very interesting. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296199) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:03 PM Author: submissive site electric furnace Like I told you eariler, it's not just about vault rank.
*edit* however since guy is working there, my opinion is going to drop. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM Author: lavender cumskin he's still a douche if he makes 450K.
hth |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 6:04 PM Author: Stirring library [Oh, fine. Guilt edit.] (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296235) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:02 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse Did you guys catch this one:
Keyboards/cowbell/lute: Captain Buzzkill & the Bringdowns |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:03 PM Author: Idiotic philosopher-king i GOTTA have more cowbell! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296685) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:05 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296695) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground He's on the masthead of the Penn Law Review...this is really, really elaborate if someone is just making fun of him. That doesn't make sense. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296703) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:07 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296712) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM Author: Embarrassed to the bone turdskin "Cancun Hot Body '03 & '04""
I don't believe it. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse see the WHOIS i posted below
his website was registered about 2 years ago, that means someone would have to hack his domain to put that stuff up there and i cant believe anyone would put that much effort into a prank |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:24 PM Author: Big Bright Ceo Hominid Yeah, unless he holds fat *exclusively* in his bean and nowhere else, that's just not happening. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296861) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:15 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat he wants his loved ones to know what flights he's on in case a plane goes down. covering his bases. how sweet. I'm sure everyone cares. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296779) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 11:01 AM Author: provocative at-the-ready garrison people who are hurt how did he get direct HAV-MIA flights? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838942) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:13 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat I actually know someone a lot like this in real life. These people exist. Every two months I get a listserved email update that's 20 pages long --and I'm pretty sure unless you're Batman or something no one has 20 pages worth in 2 months (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296759) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse Notice that this guy's resume is so douchey that no one is even talking about how fat and ugly he is. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296701) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:06 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296704) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:47 PM Author: heady pit partner Oh, geez. Now I'm ashamed that I have something in common with him.
It was basically a fricking EMAIL LIST. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:10 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat mental note: don't try to get job with Leboeuf in the fall (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296732) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:11 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse Looks legit to me, here is the WHOIS on his domain:
Domain: deshif.com Registrant David Shifren deshif@optonline.net 25 West 13th Street New York, NY 10011 US +1.1111111111
Administrative David Shifren DEShif deshif@deshif.com 25 West 13th Street New York, NY 10011 US +1.2063500531 +1.2063500531 (FAX)
Billing David Shifren DEShif deshif@deshif.com 25 West 13th Street New York, NY 10011 US +1.2063500531 +1.2063500531 (FAX)
Technical David Shifren DEShif deshif@deshif.com 25 West 13th Street New York, NY 10011 US +1.2063500531 +1.2063500531 (FAX) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:12 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296748) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:16 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat is anyone a Duke alum here? they could write and ask him for advice or something (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296794) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM Author: Bat shit crazy silver striped hyena knife NicoBlue is. They might have been in the same graduating class. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297655) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:19 PM Author: green diverse international law enforcement agency The funniest part is how he lists his upcoming summer associate position under his experiences.
After that, its his schedule that takes the cake. This guy is so damn self important that he has to post his class schedule online!! |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:20 PM Author: green diverse international law enforcement agency scratch that - look at his calendar - he has all these cheesy singles or whatever meeting listed as if he has something to do. So sad. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296825) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:22 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground I think listing the summer associate position is fine -- it's the advice the HLS OCS would give any 2L. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296834) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:26 PM Author: Gaped kitchen immigrant But for something that reeks of prestige, that's not exactly the most prestigous of firms.
And nobody cares what Harvard would do, you cunt. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground I think that someone called "HLSking" probably does care, and that's who I was talking to, genius. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297144) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine This board is filled with many vicious people. Even "respected" posters like rk982 and hanna jumped on the bully bandwagon. Pathetic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296882) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:27 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat STFU (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296884) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine I hope you have a nice life being a dickhead. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296949) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat it's been working pretty well for me so far. thanks. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296962) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 6:19 PM Author: Electric masturbator mood HAHA, that was fucking beautiful (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4842140) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:42 PM Author: Stirring library I did feel a little bad about it, yeah. Oh well. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297018) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:55 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground Same here. Too late. And anyway, posting a web site like that is the virtual equivalent of going on reality TV. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297151) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM Author: Slap-happy iridescent internal respiration Correct. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297707) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:24 AM Author: Amethyst wagecucks Agreed. Not very nice. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300443) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:29 PM Author: cerise stead Subject: THE SCHIFREN STORY (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296903) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:34 PM Author: Underhanded idiot He might be mildly autistic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296939) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:35 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat I don't think autistic people would stalk people though (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2296951) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:41 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine This guy is a weirdo but its not his fault. You can't choose the way you are born or how you talk. If anyone else here was born with all the hurdles that this guy apparantly has, I guarantee they would have rolled over and given up. Personally, I think this guy is lucky he's a genius because god knows he isn't getting by on his looks or by being a smooth talker. If he has to interview aggressively because he is a social weirdo, more power to him for going after what he wants. As for talking in class, tons of people do that, he only gets picked on because he is ugly and has a stutter. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297014) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:43 PM Author: Metal Idea He Suggested Also, he is apparently a massive tool and faggot and all-around loser. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297033) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine No doubt he is. But its still incredibly vicious to savage a stranger on an internet board like this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297050) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:49 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat look out the window, Davey. it's a cruel world. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297087) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:52 PM Author: rusted talented center dopamine I understand it may be difficult for a dickhead like you to understand that nice people exist. I assure you that just because a random poster takes the opposite side from you in an argument doesn't mean that poster must be the subject of the debate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297113) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM Author: Metal Idea He Suggested Did you learn that during Westlaw certification? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297259) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:12 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Nah, he learned it at Mensa. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297309) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:07 PM Author: exciting water buffalo absurd defense of a tool - check
excessively logical style of argumentation - check
egregious self-promotion ("nice guy") - check
use of the phrase "subject of the debate" - check
Hi David. |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 11:07 AM Author: provocative at-the-ready garrison people who are hurt (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838964) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:45 PM Author: irradiated locus kitty cat also, he defends himself on anonymous internet message boards. and unconvincingly might I add. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297052) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:11 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297302) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:51 PM Author: heady pit partner "I think this guy is lucky he's a genius..."
Wait, back up. How do we know he's a genius? The Mensa membership? National Merit Finalist? The years working for his father? What?
I've seen absolutely no evidence of that? |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:01 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Woah, that was him? The stalking rumor was circulating among 1Ls early in the term but I didn't know it was about him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297215) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:04 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse i doubt that there is a lurking xoxo reader that became so disgusted that they would come to this guy's defense (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297248) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM Author: Hairraiser school "he constantly raises his hand and has one of the worst speech impediments ive ever heard. it often takes him minutes to get out a word becuase of his stuttering problem."
Holy shit, I think I sat in on a Con Law class at Penn last year with this dude. It was the day he was called on. I was stunned. |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:53 PM Author: boyish step-uncle's house Subject: loser This guy is the next David Berkowitz/Son of Sam. Mark my words and watch and see! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308418) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 9:34 PM Author: Bearded flushed round eye area Subject: ::passes out in shock:: Oh my god. It's like the three most annoying people I know combined into one.
My sympathies to all at Penn.
At some level I feel bad for the guy, clearly teased a lot early on in life and is compensating a hell of a lot to make up for it. Unfortunately this compensation only leads to more ridiculing for being a total weirdo.
On another level, we've all been made fun of in life. And plenty of people do not turn into completely socially inept people because of it. In fact, sometimes the most well adjusted people I know where teased a lot in grade school. So that's no excuse.
And frankly, on a personal level, I have been the recipient of strange creepy guys hitting on me and it's no fun. So if he's stalking people I have a serious problem with that.
Reasons not to attend Penn...:-p |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:46 AM Author: Aromatic coiffed menage becky This kid sounds like the equivalent of a 1L at Vanderbilt who is often referred to as "the dragon."
edit: but with more tact. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:33 PM Author: Metal Idea He Suggested Isn't 'Shifren' a Jewish name?
Jewish mafia, do something about this! |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM Author: Underhanded idiot Forget it, the Nikkei link alone is enough to excommunicate him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297445) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 7:44 PM Author: deranged excitant parlor pocket flask Uh, check out the Onion link. I think that is him in the satin shirt. LOL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297046) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM Author: Spectacular stubborn university I'm surpised he didn't call it a "model shoot" on his CV. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297694) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:06 PM Author: exciting water buffalo This Deshif guy has proven to me that not only does God have a sense of humor, He's actually a cynical bastard. Keep up the good work, oh Lord of Heaven. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297258) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:19 PM Author: Outnumbered Pontificating Jap Milk What's the only part of his busy schedule he doesn't report here: http://www.deshif.com/Cal0000.htm ??
His weekly NAMBLA meetings. Look at this picture: http://www.deshif.com/david.jpg He'd be perfect in NRA-style "I am NAMBLA" advertisements. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:24 PM Author: Carmine thirsty genital piercing half-breed I knew this guy at Duke - not well, but I took some classes with him and majored in a similar, overlapping field.
There are two types of nerds: those who are quiet, nice-guy nerds (with whom I have no problem, and often befriend, even) and those who are aggressive, obnoxious, arrogant nerds (e.g. Bill Gates). This guy is in the second class.
It's kind of TTT to do this to the poor guy, though. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM Author: Trip up-to-no-good coldplay fan church building Do you know anything about him stalking girls? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297439) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297457) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:33 PM Author: Hairraiser school LMAO, that is an awesome story. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297469) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:37 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location I was there too... Unfortunately, what dickcheese posted was 100% accurate.
You just had to see it... He literally jumped out of his seat and was standing in front of the auctioneer waving his paddle around and around. It was insane. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:38 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse what was the expression of the profs face? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297504) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location She wasn't there, she just donated the item. Dunno what her reaction to this is, but like dickcheese said above, I'd be pretty freaked out. I don't even know if DeShif is going to bring 3 people with him or if he's just going to go alone with her.
The audience was laughing, but it was very uneasy... I mean, it's kind of like how a lot of people reacted to the J cutting herself thing from that xo thread the other day... The whole situation was pretty funny but when you realize that he isn't playing and is 100% serious, it kind of freaks you out after the fact. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse am i the only one that thinks he'll show up and introduce his three imaginary best friends (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297542) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297557) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse well played! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297660) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297692) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:28 PM Author: slimy curious ticket booth Edit:
I'm starting to feel bad. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:29 PM Author: Aqua stage telephone (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297440) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:31 PM Author: Underhanded idiot I think he emceed my Bar Mitzvah. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297455) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:32 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!
Unbelievable, simply unbelievable... From the tux, to the U.S. Supreme Court bar, to the AOL URL... |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:41 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse what does it take to graduate 'near' the top of your class at Fordham? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297531) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:45 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location I dunno about that, but it must be pretty damn hard to become an adjunct professor of law at the local community college. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297561) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:48 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse his son is obviously a better web designer and goes to a much more prestigious law school. i wonder what shif sr. must be like in real life. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297587) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:51 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Eh, after seeing DeShif.com Penn doesn't feel very prestigious anymore :( (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297610) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:56 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297654) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:43 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297547) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM Author: Aqua stage telephone (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297631) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:58 PM Author: Trip up-to-no-good coldplay fan church building Link from above:
http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/ |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:36 PM Author: gold persian rehab Damn that's funny.
I love the guy's pic on the right. What a fag.
This confirms it: douchebaggery is genetic. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:44 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297558) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse initially i thought that reading this would do him some good. (as i posted above, i was a pretty big dork in HS, simply because i was just so unaware of social norms and my social image. getting picked on honestly did wonders for my life since then)
but in my experience there are just some kids that dont get it and dont care. the type of guys that you might invite to sit with you at lunch or invite out for a beer just to make an effort to include them, but they turn out to be even weirder than you expected. the guy obviously enjoys his life and is proud of his accomplishments. i cant imagine him reading this thread and being enlightened on the one hand or emotionally hurt on the other. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297647) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 10:24 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location Yeah, there's no way that he can't *not* know what people think of him here. He probably doesn't care or loves it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298364) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 2:04 PM Author: boyish step-uncle's house "enlighten on the one hand or emotionally distrubed on the other". Are you kidding? This guy is going to update his resume/CV to include this link to show how much people are talking about him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308523) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 9:32 AM Author: bisexual giraffe He probably googles himself on a regular basis. If xoxo threads turn up in google, he'll find it himself.
I just googled him on my own, and he's listed as the treasurer of the Golden Key at Hunter. 2003. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:50 PM Author: Infuriating glittery private investor It's not very "Bush team leader" of him to travel to red Cuba and spend his Euros there! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297607) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:53 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location That website made me feel ashamed to be a Republican. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297622) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:57 PM Author: Aqua stage telephone As if the GOP had oodles of dignity in the first place. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297666) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:59 PM Author: Trip up-to-no-good coldplay fan church building 172 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297706) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 2:02 PM Author: heady pit partner I feel the same way. I was really hoping he'd be a wacko liberal. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308498) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 8:55 PM Author: Startling vigorous theater stage $1000 vegas (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2297648) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 9:44 PM Author: sticky bronze athletic conference fortuitous meteor i dont get it, why would anyone want to read his schedule and calendar? what is the purpose of having that shit on his website? The resume is one thing, but why do i need to know where he is every second of every single day? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298093) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 9:55 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298193) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 10:47 PM Author: Ultramarine soggy school cafeteria strict scrutiny: he'safag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298507) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:22 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298729) |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 10:22 AM Author: mauve cheese-eating principal's office national security agency ROFL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3047023) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:25 PM Author: supple chartreuse whorehouse antidepressant drug i know the entire family pretty well, though i'm certainly not friends with david.
give him a break. he's been taking shit his whole life.
and don't bring the dad into it. shitty website or not, take it from me, the guy's pretty fucking successful. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:31 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse we dont need to take it from you, we've got his life story on a website (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298787) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:32 PM Author: slimy curious ticket booth Taking shit from what? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298793) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:35 PM Author: supple chartreuse whorehouse antidepressant drug from peers. likely due to stuttering and social awkwardness, as well as his looks. he might be annoying as all hell in large groups, but he's a pretty nice guy otherwise. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298815) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground I know a guy who is a severe stutterer and he was well liked and successful at HYS -- he was on law review and ended up at a top-5 NY firm. Law school may look like high school, but it's not. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298893) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 2:14 PM Author: boyish step-uncle's house Listen, this guy brings shit upon himself by creating a website like and by out-biding himself for a picnic. If he get's picked on because of his actions, it's his own fault.
I actually started to feel sorry for this guy until I read his sense of self importance. There are likeable nerds but this guy isn't one of them. So, if he gets picked on... oh well. That said, he'll probably have the last laugh after he explodes and goes postal on all of us. |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:33 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298802) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:36 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse surely you jest? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298823) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:38 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298842) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:40 PM Author: Talking Learning Disabled Hunting Ground Is Burbank around this year? I wouldn't want him to get shot. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298864) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:41 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse if he really plans to blow away some kids at school im sure he'll update his calendar online before he does it (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298872) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 1:10 AM Author: Ultramarine soggy school cafeteria hahahahah 1fucking80 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299424) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 12:55 PM Author: Vengeful Overrated Coffee Pot Tanning Salon A+ (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300946) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:45 PM Author: copper fat ankles This reminds me of the good 'ol days of XOXO. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298899) |
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Date: March 9th, 2005 11:48 PM Author: sexy dog poop forum - (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2298916) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 12:52 AM Author: Arrogant histrionic place of business preventive strike Subject: Holy Crap, it's David Shifren! I went to college with this guy. He was notorious on campus for being the biggest nerd at the entire school. I can't say I really ever talked to him, but he was a total tool.
1. I know of at least two girls that had to get restraining orders against him because he stalked them. He would wait outside their dorms for them every day, all day. No social graces, couldn't figure out that just because a girl smiled at you in class does not make her your new best friend.
2. I saw him on Halloween one year wearing a cheerleading outfit. Keep in mind, he's at least 70 pounds overweight. And he wasn't the funny fat kid in a group of friends doing it to be funny. It was very creepy.
3. As others have noted, he's the arrogant, aggressive, supernerd. We all hated him.
4. I don't know if he got kicked out of school for stalking, but it certainly wouldn't surprise me. His picture isn't in the class yearbook, and he's not listed in the online alumni directory. |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 1:29 AM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299554) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 2:12 AM Author: vibrant fuchsia plaza nice! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2299840) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 6:38 AM Author: razzle-dazzle self-centered den depressive I find it strange that this kid's apparently a big ol' federalist but is also in "journal of law and social change" (sounds liberal) and STREET LAW. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300222) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:13 AM Author: vivacious federal cuckold national You are such asses. I met this guy a couple of weeks ago, and he seems fine in real life. Give him a break. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300239) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:28 AM Author: Embarrassed to the bone turdskin Aren't you supposed to go to YLS? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300450) |
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Date: March 5th, 2006 2:36 AM Author: avocado associate HI DAVID (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251259) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:26 AM Author: Cocky Alpha Headpube As soon as he finds out about all of this he's definitely adding "The Most Prestigious Admissions Board in the World" to the "featured in" section of his CV. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300243) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 11:36 AM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300735) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:33 AM Author: Comical umber space regret Wow. I thought UVA's republican nerdy guy who everbody knows who has a website was sort of toolish, but he looks like Miles Davis compared to Mr. Shif.
I don't know why I posted this, as I won't say who the UVA guy is, so don't bother asking. |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:56 AM Author: Comical umber space regret Oh, and whether there was any doubt that this is really him putting up the site, well, I think it runs in the family
http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/ |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 1:15 PM Author: green diverse international law enforcement agency Whats with the magician pictures? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301101) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 6:25 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location What's with the AOL address? At least DeShif got his own domain name. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302842) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 8:38 AM Author: mind-boggling box office This person is a classic example of why all schools should REQUIRE interviews before offering admission. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300268) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 8:51 AM Author: Adventurous cordovan institution legal warrant lmao...wow. really. wow. nobody else puts MIDDLE SCHOOL or sophomore year of high school "honors" on their stuff, right? and is a link to "Spanish" in "Proficient in Spanish - verbal and written communication" really necessary? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300278) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:43 AM Author: Translucent aphrodisiac locale potus Subject: I cant believe Im sorry... I'm really still in disbelief that people like this actually exist. What happens to them? ARe these the kind of people who become famously successful? I have to assume no way... but I actually think his resume is preety fucking prestigious.
Nonetheless, I'm sure he scores in the bottom 10th percentile on all standardized social skill tests. He reminds me of that guy in office space, milton. |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:56 AM Author: Orchid Mewling Police Squad You guys, I am a NATIONAL AP SCHOLAR WITH DISTINCTION and I didn't put that anywhere in my applications. Am I screwed? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300549) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 12:57 PM Author: Vengeful Overrated Coffee Pot Tanning Salon How'd that paper go? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300958) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 12:35 PM Author: Orchid Mewling Police Squad I just had to turn in the proposal (four pages plus preliminary bibliography) and he ate it up, gave me an A, and said it is a wonderful and unique topic.
I can only assume that Peen Law Review is in my future, but seriously, thanks. ;) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:56 PM Author: Vengeful Overrated Coffee Pot Tanning Salon That's an interesting typo.
GL. |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:57 PM Author: Orchid Mewling Police Squad I will chalk that up to midterms, and also my TTTness. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308451) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 1:58 PM Author: Vengeful Overrated Coffee Pot Tanning Salon It's cool. Yours was an easy question, really; harder has been answering the "What should I write my college essay about?" questions (I teach high school, if you didn't already know that) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2308465) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 2:26 PM Author: Orchid Mewling Police Squad Their desire to sleep with members of the adcomm.
That's what I wrote my law one on. ;) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 11:09 AM Author: apoplectic bossy piazza hairy legs check out the link to his father's law firm...
http://members.aol.com/shiflaw/
who puts a picture of themselves like that up on their professional site. |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 2:35 AM Author: Dashing brunch scourge upon the earth Like father, like son...their webdesign skills are AWFUL. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046420) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 12:30 PM Author: Cerebral Boiling Water Feces You guys are just jealous... My resume is more prestigous than yours, my father is more presitgous than yours, and the girl that I stalk and will one day be my girlfriend is more prestigous than your girlfriend. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300788) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 12:43 PM Author: bisexual giraffe yeah...that's it (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2300847) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 4:01 PM Author: razzmatazz dun weed whacker therapy thanks man, I spent 10 minutes reading this post in class, then you post this, I lose my shit and starting laughing out loud in Con Law. Luckily, the teacher did not say anything. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301861) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 2:31 PM Author: Chestnut boistinker son of senegal I'm not going to make fun of this guy because he's just emblematic of the Republican Party (David Shifren = New School Karl Rove) and Long Island as a whole. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301466) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 2:49 PM Author: racy stock car trump supporter You think Shitren carries business cards with him? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2301563) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 6:36 PM Author: bearded bawdyhouse i suspect they would be 'business binders' (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2302913) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:24 PM Author: Shimmering arousing theatre LOL. THIS GUY IS A FAGGOT. I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE CLASSES WITH HIM THOUGH. NON STOP COMEDY EVERY DAY. LOL (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303187) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 7:32 PM Author: concupiscible milky incel i'm surprised to see people bashing LeBoeuf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2303231) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:33 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304313) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:34 PM Author: Self-absorbed indian lodge Well, they did hire this douchebag. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304326) |
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Date: March 10th, 2005 10:39 PM Author: Tan office sneaky criminal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2304370) |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 10:42 PM Author: Exhilarant turquoise gunner rigpig I feel bad for the poor guy. So he is a big nerd and he is annoying. I get it. I would be mortified if I went on the internet and read hundreds of messages making fun of me. No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are. I say it's time to call off the hounds. |
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Date: March 11th, 2005 10:46 PM Author: Unholy Hissy Fit Cruise Ship You're a dolt. By voluntarily making the details of his life visible to all, he has thoroughly forfeited any entitlement to pity. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2312228) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:26 PM Author: Titillating lime stage haunted graveyard bump (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388651) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:31 PM Author: passionate affirmative action dilemma Thanks. I forgot about this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388684) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 3:40 PM Author: Titillating lime stage haunted graveyard I love it - I can't get enough of it (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2388752) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 4:25 PM Author: Multi-colored painfully honest corner check out his pic w/ Ari Fleischer on his website.
Edit: Is that real silk? http://www.deshif.com/pix/ARI.JPG
(probably right after meeting Ari: riding the goat - http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:00 PM Author: Cracking state "Hello 911...There is a douchebag harrasing Judge Jones and some of her interns..."
http://www.deshif.com/pix/BSJ1.JPG |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM Author: odious canary sandwich Damn, the one on the right of the judge is hot. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390003) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:01 PM Author: Titillating lime stage haunted graveyard Probably spent 2 hours rounding up that many women - only to have his shot ruined by another male in the background. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390007) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:17 PM Author: Multi-colored painfully honest corner Every time I start feeling bad about this thread I think about the past two presidential elections. The fact that I feel bad at all is the problem. Democrats need to learn to be heartless a$$holes. Might as well learn by practicing on Republicans. (NOTE: I do like Christine Todd Whitman, but I'm pretty sure she isn't a real Republican). (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390098) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:24 PM Author: Thriller Gas Station Codepig LOOK AT THE MANTITTIES ON THAT TOOL! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391100) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:47 PM Author: jet-lagged pervert sex offender Subject: are you sure? Ombudsman, Please view this picture that he VOLUNTARILY posted on his website: http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg (and recently mentioned above)...
Do you still contend that "No one deserves that sort of public humiliation, no matter how much of a nerd they are."
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM Author: shivering swashbuckling location The Goat has been violated :( (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390340) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:27 PM Author: 180 nighttime trailer park (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391123) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:48 PM Author: peach flatulent property puppy Subject: wow does this poor guy even know he's getting totally owned on xoxo by now? somebody must have told him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390345) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:53 PM Author: Cerebral Boiling Water Feces Yes I know, In fact it's on my resume. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390375) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 6:55 PM Author: Titillating lime stage haunted graveyard I checked - I don't see it on the main page. Is it in Appendix C? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2390389) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 10:18 PM Author: Multi-colored painfully honest corner LMFAO (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391927) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:47 PM Author: bateful impressive market boltzmann Oh man, I think I've passed his father's law practice in Hicksville. The one I'm thinking of has its phone number in huge gold numbers on the front of the building, so I'll have to pay more attention the next time I pass it. It's right near where LILCO was, so I think that could be it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391312) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:52 PM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Subject: Nope That's Dominic Barbara's practice. My father's practice used to be down the road from there but no longer is. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392841) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:54 AM Author: Motley pozpig (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394077) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:57 AM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Not personally. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394103) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:11 AM Author: navy laughsome travel guidebook lettuce Do you know me? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394220) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:14 AM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Nope. Should I? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394245) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM Author: navy laughsome travel guidebook lettuce Yes. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394273) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:19 AM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Or, rather, do I? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394301) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 8:48 PM Author: Rose fragrant degenerate Subject: Computer Science When I first saw that photo, I thought to myself "computer science." Then I scrolled down the page and . . . (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2391320) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:30 PM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Subject: I'm touched... ... that everyone seems to find my site so hilarious.
1. Yes, the site is real. I'm real. And I'm really DEShif himself. (To prove it's me, here's the IM I got from Jim Adler: Mr Jim Adler (7:12:27 PM): You seriously have got to be the biggest tool I have ever come across in my life. Your resume is pathetic and the fact that you list the things that you do on your away message is just sad.)
2. Neither "xeris" nor "David Shifren" are me. I just found about this forum (and, indeed, this site) tonight when someone posted to my site's forum.
3. The story about my bidding for $950 for picnic with Struve is true. I did have a group lined up (although not at that price). And it has nothing to do with her looks or gender and everything to do with market competition. You may recall I also bought events with Profs. Roosevelt, Persily, Parchomovsky, and Prichett (all male). The only reason I spent $950 for this one was because a group of 1Ls bid up to $900.
4. The rumors about expulsion from Duke, restraining orders, or any stalking at all are utterly untrue. Ask the admissions office if you don't believe me - they've seen my records.
5. The photo of Judge Jones' chambers really are the clerks and interns. At the time it was taken, I was the only male in the office. And, no, that's not why I took the job!
6. Yes, the hot body championships are true. And, yes, I won them despite (or perhaps due to?) my being fat and ugly.
7. This online resume isn't the same as my actual, paper resume. That one is one page and omits almost all of the minor things which are on the online resume. This one is much more comprehensive and (perhaps exhaustively) detailed.
8. Finally, the purpose behind the event calendar and schedule is twofold: first, for my own convenience - I don't have a PDA and secondly, because my friends (yes, I do have friends!) sometimes use it to see what's going on, what classes I'm taking, or when I'm free.
9. The Cuba trip was legal (and quite fun) - I had Treasury Dept. permission through the law school to conduct academic research.
10. Finally, despite what many on the board have speculated, I am neither gay nor a virgin (although, admittedly, I am single). And, in response to your next question, I've never used a prostitute.
Let me know if you have any other questions. :) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:32 PM Author: Carnelian doctorate i like you (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392631) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 12:17 AM Author: Galvanic toilet seat youve got a pair my friend. welcome to the insanity. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393135) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 12:29 AM Author: ruby charismatic sanctuary Dear Mr. Shifren,
Upon examining your resume, my advisors and I have concluded that I am more prestigious than you. While you have achieved some prestigiousness in your day, you simply do not rival the glorious elitism that is 174. HTH.
Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition.
Feel free to ask for advice if you ever need help not being a TTT.
Gloriously elite, 174 |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 12:45 AM Author: Flesh indecent voyeur "Please update your resume's "Recognition" section to reflect that I responded to your post, as this surely constitutes prestigious recognition"
Yes. 180. |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 12:47 AM Author: ruby charismatic sanctuary *bows*
I have racked up two 180's tonight. This is unprecedented. |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:28 AM Author: Wonderful field corn cake a truly stirring moment of prestigiousness (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393893) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:43 AM Author: Shaky Personal Credit Line Hey douchebag,
I actually found this funny. Well done. Finally youre getting the hang of utilizing your schtick in an effective manner. Keep it up, and Ill refrain from embarassing you.
Hugs and Kisses,
YOUREANIDIOT |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:36 AM Author: ruby charismatic sanctuary Thanks for the vote of confidence- I just had to work out the kinks.
I sure am glad you're done "embarassing" me! |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 11:27 AM Author: Deep beady-eyed rigor 176 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395868) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:35 AM Author: slimy curious ticket booth You sound pretty nice. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393946) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 5:12 PM Author: Sienna Gaming Laptop Subject: please grow up Greetings.
Making fun of others is fine. We all do it.
It is extremely cowardly, however, to do so anonymously, hiding behind the cloak of a website.
Thus, I present a real, working email address: adamspamguard-autoadmit@yahoo.com
[Of course, this is a temporary address, I can keep it as long (or short) as I want. But for now it goes straight to my inbox]
Anyway. I strongly recommend that many of you think long and hard about your desire and readiness for law school. These types of baseless attacks simply are not welcome within these halls.
If nothing else, please do not come to Penn. You won't fit in and we won't accept these types of attitudes and behaviors.
And in the future, if you have something to say, please at least attach a name and email.
--Adam |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:33 PM Author: Seedy Aggressive Address Jewess This douche misspelled "university" on his TTTSHITEATINGFAGGOT resume! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392639) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:47 PM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Subject: Doh! Wow, how embarrassing! Thanks for letting me know! I'll fix it right away! (Good thing this isn't the resume I send to employers!) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392798) |
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Date: March 23rd, 2005 11:48 PM Author: Ruddy blathering chapel circlehead be nice, he's a really nice, smart guy. just dorky. he was in my freshman dorm. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2392806) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 12:12 AM Author: Doobsian Elastic Band Did you ever play spit and shove? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393083) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:29 AM Author: Wonderful field corn cake holy shit -- you know him? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2393896) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM Author: Chocolate pisswyrm dysfunction Subject: You're all fucked. I know David from another school he went to. Yes, he sat in the front and raised his hand, and yes he would often annoy the teacher, and yes it took him a little while to get his words out and yes he was akward with girls and akward in general.
However, he has a good heart. He is a good guy. He is never mean, always positive and if he comes off arrogant sometimes, well re-read the aforegoing posts and ask yourself why someone who is constantly made fun of might act like that. I wasn't his best friend, or really knew him, but someone told me of this post today and we all talked about why it was sad that there were so many immature children who could not be supportive of those around them who might be challenged in one way or another. Maybe sometimes people paint targets on themselves, but who are we to hurl shit at them.
I wish David the best of luck. I think he should, if he is reading this, understand that people are jealous, in the case of these posts, it pervades their comments, and finally David, all of us at Cardozo think well of you and wish you the best.
Fuck these people and keep growing, you'll learn what you need to, God knows you are smart enough to get there. Be yourself. Find your way. Keep your head up. Most importantly, don't listen to the negativity. Good Luck.
Paul Perkins |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:47 AM Author: Wonderful field corn cake why are you responding to MY post, dipshit? i never said anything bad about the guy. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394027) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 1:50 AM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Hey Paul - thanks for the warm wishes. It's good to hear from you and give my regards to the Cardozo crew! I miss you guys - drop me a line sometime! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394048) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:16 AM Author: Seedy Aggressive Address Jewess Cardozo crew...OUCH! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394276) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma ?! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394296) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 2:18 AM Author: navy laughsome travel guidebook lettuce www.hallmark.com (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2394299) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 11:20 AM Author: Flesh indecent voyeur Hi David. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2395818) |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 6:00 PM Author: garnet bonkers shitlib Subject: what I have learned from this thread 1. the future of the justice system will be in the hands of many childish, hateful misfits who have nothing better to do than attempt to destroy the self-esteem of an accomplished human being.
2. Posting enormous amounts of personal information online is an invariable risk and makes you vulnerable to such scrutiny. |
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Date: March 24th, 2005 6:57 PM Author: trust fund abode why does his phone number have a seattle area code? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2398956) |
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Date: April 21st, 2005 7:05 PM Author: Disrespectful Burgundy Stag Film Roommate Cell phone, I would assume. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#2607210) |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 2:08 AM Author: orange bbw probably (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3046322) |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 2:22 AM Author: Dashing brunch scourge upon the earth http://www.deshif.com/pix/B10.jpg
Now we all know what he does on his off time...
edit: http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG this too. |
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Date: June 18th, 2005 2:30 AM Author: Dashing brunch scourge upon the earth http://www.deshif.com/pix/P4130076.JPG
bwahahahaha. Funniest pic yet. |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 4:08 PM Author: opaque home Subject: David Shifren Hi, my name is Carol, and I've been friends with Dave since high school. Rather, he has been a good friend to me for almost the last 10 years, despite my immaturity throughout most of the time period. For a very long time, I was an utter douchebag who thought that popularity mattered and Dave was strange, so I wasn't a very good friend to him. (Dave, please consider this my official apology.)
Dave has stuck by me through thick and thin all of these years. He has been a thoughtful, kind, and generous friend and a great listener. He is an intelligent, patient person who gives without expecting anything in return from others. Whenever someone pokes fun at him, he takes it in stride and is never mean to the offending party. The rest of us can learn a lot from him.
More about me: Right now I'm in business school in the DC area. Usually I'm pretty normal and boring (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_1058.jpg ) but sometimes I can be silly and cool like Dave (http://photos1.blogger.com/img/63/3838/1024/IMG_0018.jpg ).
If any of you douchebags out there want to sling insults at me for defending my friend, feel free. Your puerile stupidity amuses me.
Carol |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 4:09 PM Author: Ivory foreskin marketing idea What STD's do you have? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065665) |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 4:12 PM Author: opaque home Actually, it's very interesting that you ask this question. As a precaution, I get tested at least once every year. I just got my results back today and I've tested negative for all of the diseases. Unless you're counting intelligence as an STD. :) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065697) |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 6:17 PM Author: maroon lodge patrolman Shut up. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3066750) |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 4:10 PM Author: Unholy Hissy Fit Cruise Ship Eat shit and die. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065674) |
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Date: June 20th, 2005 4:14 PM Author: opaque home Nice username! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#3065705) |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 3:26 AM Author: French Public Bath LOL BUMP (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4605993) |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 3:29 AM Author: big-titted mad cow disease casino http://www.deshif.com/pix/PB100049.JPG (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606008) |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 3:36 AM Author: Spruce massive resort clown Ride 'em cowboy! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4606038) |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 4:46 AM Author: rebellious bull headed lay "LEGAL EXPERIENCE
LeBoeuf, Lamb, Greene & MacRae LLP, New York, New York - Summer Associate, Summer 2005."
pwn3d |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 9:11 PM Author: Hall Subject: "Education" Duke University
nuff said. |
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Date: December 19th, 2005 10:11 PM Author: topaz temple really tough guy OH MY FUCKING GOD ALL MIGHTY!!!!! This has to be one of the best threads EVER! Still, after Davids response....he seems like a perfectly well adjusted, kind, if awkward feller. I for one support him despite his extreme lack of social skills. If you will allow me:
Life is tough, as tough can be But David you can count on thee to pull yourself from deep dispair and rise above, and make it there
Your talents wide, and varied are with a little hope, youll be a star just make sure to love yourself and lose some weight, if for your health
your wit is keen, and lsat high your memory strong, you are not shy your breast is large, to hold your heart which beats in rhythm, it does its part
and despite what these losers say nay never forget that though you may display the douchbaggery most high and hard you can allways play the lexis card |
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Date: December 20th, 2005 12:56 AM Author: Hilarious mexican cuck rock on dave!
Also, did you guys notice he attended the Institute for Justice law student conference?
He's a libertarian to boot. I don't care what his persona is (which doesn't seem all that bad). If he uses his intellectual talents and ambitions to further the cause of liberty MORE POWER TO HIM. |
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Date: December 20th, 2005 3:06 AM Author: abnormal sable blood rage Vicious satire is not 'hatred'. Teacher's pets have always been ridiculed, so no sympathy should be expected. . . (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4616610) |
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Date: December 20th, 2005 2:15 PM Author: Sick Red Queen Of The Night Cuckoldry I've got one word.....HA (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619455) |
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Date: December 20th, 2005 2:37 PM Author: Frum snowy shrine main people In keeping with Penn's employed at graduation rate, he must be working at like 3 firms simultaneously by now. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4619677) |
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Date: January 16th, 2006 5:07 PM Author: Onyx Awkward Psychic Native Subject: I saw this loser in Cancun Over Christmas break I saw this loser dancing his fat ass off in a cancun nightclub (by himself of course). I even asked him was he a Penn law student to be sure, he asked "what have I done?" I said I was a 3L and recognized him. Meanwhile I had to come up with a lie so explain to my friends why I was talking to this loser.
I'll say this, the boy ain't shy... |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM Author: Flickering Station dp (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838492) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 4:24 AM Author: Flickering Station The fact that he went to cancun by himself. And went to a bar by himself. And was dancing by himself makes 'shif very, very, prestigious. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4838493) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 1:08 PM Author: Henna marvelous meetinghouse friendly grandma Subject: Must have missed... You must have missed the fact that I was there with, oh, 40 or so friends. (I've been going to Cancun for 20 years, so I know a lot of people down there.) Nice try, though. And, if I recall correctly, I rebuffed your advance. I didn't mean to be hurtful, I just don't swing that way. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839613) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 1:38 PM Author: Black Hospital Reading Party I'd like to stick that pudgy meathole of yours (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839810) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 1:40 PM Author: Parlour Brethren I admire this motherfucker (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4839818) |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 10:56 AM Author: bespoke heaven french chef He's got moxie. I'll give him that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847351) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 3:53 PM Author: erotic hateful mad-dog skullcap LEBOUEFPWN3DDD!!!!111 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840902) |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 10:44 AM Author: Onyx Awkward Psychic Native I didn't notice the 40 friends, but I wasn't looking for them either.
I felt like I was in the presence of a celebrity. Lowly ole me watching DeShif groove on the corner of the stage. I thought DeShif only existed in my dreams. I was starstruck watching you move those meaty hips to the beat of the music. If only I had internet access that night my friends and I could have celebrated our chance encounter with xoxo royalty. Instead all I heard was "What the fuck are you doing talking to that guy." I even was going to take a photo of you with a couple of the girls we were with, but they were worried about you dripping sweat on them.
I do have a healthy measure of respect for DeShif, any dude willing to get up on the DJ stage and dance by himself is cool by me. You, Mr. DeShif, have enough balls for 8 normal men. I salute you.
By the way, there were a ton of young hotties there that night, I trust you did not go home alone. |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 11:50 AM Author: Lemon stimulating juggernaut gay wizard you are frighteningly cool (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847625) |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 12:11 PM Author: Onyx Awkward Psychic Native thats what I keep hearing. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847775) |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 11:47 AM Author: Nubile insanely creepy volcanic crater hell Awesome. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847612) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 4:09 PM Author: dull confused set You guys have problems. This guy seems fine. You guys, on the other hand, look pathetic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4840997) |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 6:49 PM Author: Electric masturbator mood whatever, this fat retarded dumbfuck is the kind of fat retarded dumbfuck that gives lawyers, republicans, Americans and white males a bad name.
Shockingly, this idiot hasn't even been compared to who he is most like. Even though, as I recall, there is a photo with him with the dude.
Karl Rove was close, but Rove at least is an architect, a strategic thinker that can assess avenues and devise tactics to negotiate them toward success.
This fat dumbass is more like Ken Starr than anyone else. His claim to fame: examining Bill Clintons spooge marks. This heeb is well on his way. |
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Date: January 17th, 2006 7:06 PM Author: dull confused set Who are you talking about? That kid is just a law student. Where are you getting all this shit?
You have problems. |
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Date: January 18th, 2006 10:54 AM Author: Lemon stimulating juggernaut gay wizard he seems like a perfectly decent guy. and GTO -- our "director of educational services" -- ridiculing someone for credential puffery is ridiculously ironic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#4847345) |
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Date: March 5th, 2006 2:32 AM Author: Yellow double fault bump (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=146685&forum_id=2#5251207) |