\
  The most prestigious law school admissions discussion board in the world.
BackRefresh Options Favorite

DLA Piper Baltimore (East) calling for reinforcements

We can't hold the line much longer! Send the insursnce defen...
zombie-like theater
  04/28/15
They've already been pushed out of their lowrise projects of...
free-loading tripping corner
  04/28/15
(pro bono clients storm the office) "Hey guys, cut it ...
Arousing puppy center
  04/28/15
A bloodied 1st year associate busts open the roof hatch as f...
exhilarant mewling masturbator national security agency
  04/28/15
Yes.
bipolar depressive
  04/28/15
93849052122
claret at-the-ready preventive strike
  04/28/15
...
Shaky supple affirmative action pozpig
  04/28/15
Amazing.
violent resort
  04/28/15
1800000
Hairraiser fiercely-loyal senate skinny woman
  04/28/15
...
bearded carmine station
  04/28/15
Superb.
Flesh mischievous incel
  04/28/15
98474663535474849493737
flushed macaca spot
  04/28/15
Neumann Morgenste bursts through the lobby doors atop a stal...
zombie-like theater
  04/28/15
lmfao
exhilarant mewling masturbator national security agency
  04/28/15
...
Startled meetinghouse reading party
  04/29/15
TYVMFTMB
Flesh mischievous incel
  04/29/15
...
Bonkers personal credit line
  04/06/21
...
out-of-control big office boiling water
  04/28/15
...
Charcoal Pervert
  04/28/15
...
Exciting philosopher-king
  04/28/15
...
zombie-like theater
  04/28/15
meh
avocado nudist box office brethren
  04/29/15
Fuck off. You do better.
startling marketing idea
  04/29/15
wrong
Dashing swollen organic girlfriend
  06/09/16
Your best work. Thanks for the chuckles.
insane haunted graveyard ape
  04/29/15
holy shit
cream soul-stirring cuckoldry
  04/29/15
Wtf 180
diverse bespoke telephone lettuce
  04/29/15
Is one good lawyer's life worth the protection of scholarshi...
mustard awkward trailer park
  04/29/15
...
mustard awkward trailer park
  06/08/16
1111888888880000
Dashing swollen organic girlfriend
  06/08/16
Did not read
Swashbuckling grizzly state
  06/08/16
dont be intimidated as i was at 1st
Dashing swollen organic girlfriend
  06/08/16
...
Cracking Tanning Salon Patrolman
  08/01/18
...
Blue sanctuary hunting ground
  08/01/18
...
zombie-like theater
  04/06/21
holy shit
sepia brunch laser beams
  04/06/21
...
Bonkers personal credit line
  04/06/21
...
Soggy charismatic messiness
  06/08/16
I was about to give the OP a 180 until I realized it was my ...
zombie-like theater
  06/08/16
Love it when that happens
Soggy charismatic messiness
  06/08/16
...
zombie-like theater
  11/28/17
...
mustard awkward trailer park
  08/01/18
...
cerebral light voyeur gas station
  08/01/18
...
Bonkers personal credit line
  04/06/21


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 8:53 AM
Author: zombie-like theater

We can't hold the line much longer! Send the insursnce defense batallion from Pitsburgh!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776574)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 8:56 AM
Author: free-loading tripping corner

They've already been pushed out of their lowrise projects office, and have retreated to the tower

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776580)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 8:59 AM
Author: Arousing puppy center

(pro bono clients storm the office)

"Hey guys, cut it out, ow! My glasses cost several hundred dollars! I don't think that carpet is fireproof! Hey, we'll call you if we ever get a settlement check for you from the Department of Education! Guys?"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776585)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 9:43 AM
Author: exhilarant mewling masturbator national security agency

A bloodied 1st year associate busts open the roof hatch as feral youths claw and tear at his legs, ripping off strips of his Jos A Bank Executive Gabardine Pleated Wool Pants. He manages to kick himself free and hoist his dangling legs onto the roof. One of his Florsheims doesn't make it. A small price to pay for the glorious scene that awaits him. Before him rises the DLA Piper, A Global Firm (tm), Signal Beacon. He rubs his eyes as if waking from a dream. The legendary beacon was constructed by the ancient race of Piper Rudnick LLP, proud men who once governed a fair and just firm but who now lived scattered among the forests, bogs and caves of the world, their realm shattered by the 2005 merger. The beacon consists of four ivory pillars, supporting a roof protecting an obsidian altar below. Cool to the touch, its sides are adorned with skillfully carved depictions of Piper Rudnick managing partners of old. Maskowitz the Mad. Cohen the Unready. Their features look otherworldly, angelic. The associate runs his fingers across the ridges and grooves, feeling the outline of their faces. Drawing inspiration from the heroes of deals past.

The moment of reflection is interrupted by a sudden crash, a grotesque young hand of color has burst through the roof hatch and is now flailing around blindly for flesh to rend. A brisk spring wind brings up the sound of screams from the streets below. The associate takes a deep breath and calmly pulls the blackberry out of the chest pocket of his Traveler Wrinkle-Free Slim Fit shirt. He loads Carpe Diem. Typing now. Frantic. "0.2 - Lit the signal beacons". He pauses, recalls the Zeke Morris post from the Biglaw Advice thread from the day before. "0.5 - Coordinated and discussed with team re: lighting the signal beacons...". These duties extinguished, he trades the blackberry for a set of matches from his back pocket. He's trembling now. Not only from the cool April breeze whipping off the Atlantic but also for the fact that, deep down, he knows he's not given adequate notice to his team that he would be beaten to bloody pulp by youths of color on the rooftop. No matter. Summer associates will arrive soon. They'll fight on without him. It takes a few tries to light the match, he's shaking violently now. Finally it ignites. He immediately throws the match into the hollowed out center of the altar.

A brilliant blaze erupts, throwing him backwards against the AC unit and scorching his ginger unibrow. The fire singes away the swollen clouds of a cool mid-Atlantic evening. Just a few seconds later. A reciprocal blaze from across the Delmarva. "My god!! We're saved!! The fires of Wilmington burn bright!". Far off in the distance, more lights. Stars lighting up the sky. A celestial trail stretching towards Atlantic City. Now Philadelphia. Trenton. New York City. Pittsburgh. Another crash. He realizes that he'll be dead within minutes. A corpse without a head and a lawyer without a name. But reinforcements would arrive to avenge him. Troops were no doubt already massing within the fiery frontiers of DLA's realms. Barrel chested litigators from New York with fists of stone and limp-dicked WUSTL men who fought with a frenzy and vigor reminiscent of the Old Norse berserkers. He smiles now as the youths of color swarm him, removing his limbs from his body, stretching him in every direction, tearing off limbs as if his component parts were being removed for future reassembly. "Thanllll" his severed head groans as a protesting youth hoists it triumphantly. All black now. His duty is done.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776783)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 9:47 AM
Author: bipolar depressive

Yes.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776796)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:02 AM
Author: claret at-the-ready preventive strike

93849052122

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776853)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:07 AM
Author: Shaky supple affirmative action pozpig



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776874)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:17 AM
Author: violent resort

Amazing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776905)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:20 AM
Author: Hairraiser fiercely-loyal senate skinny woman

1800000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776923)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:21 AM
Author: bearded carmine station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776930)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:22 AM
Author: Flesh mischievous incel

Superb.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776932)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:30 AM
Author: flushed macaca spot

98474663535474849493737

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27776976)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:45 AM
Author: zombie-like theater

Neumann Morgenste bursts through the lobby doors atop a stallion, decapitating a protestor with one mighty swing of his great sword.

The beleaguered and battered summer associates, exhausted from a night of gallantly holding the elevator bank, collapse at his side. "Thank the gods, you've arrived!"

"Don't thank the gods" belts NMTP. His horse bucks wildly as they charge into the stairwell. "Thanl the scholarship!"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27777044)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 12:08 PM
Author: exhilarant mewling masturbator national security agency

lmfao

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27777620)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 2:35 AM
Author: Startled meetinghouse reading party



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783715)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 10:39 AM
Author: Flesh mischievous incel

TYVMFTMB

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27784607)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:19 PM
Author: Bonkers personal credit line



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#42234198)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:48 AM
Author: out-of-control big office boiling water



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27777060)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 10:51 AM
Author: Charcoal Pervert



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27777073)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 11:00 AM
Author: Exciting philosopher-king



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27777145)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 28th, 2015 5:07 PM
Author: zombie-like theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27780053)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 1:50 AM
Author: avocado nudist box office brethren

meh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783590)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 1:56 AM
Author: startling marketing idea

Fuck off. You do better.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783618)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 9th, 2016 2:54 AM
Author: Dashing swollen organic girlfriend

wrong

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30658864)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 2:30 AM
Author: insane haunted graveyard ape

Your best work. Thanks for the chuckles.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783702)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 3:47 AM
Author: cream soul-stirring cuckoldry

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783878)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 4:42 AM
Author: diverse bespoke telephone lettuce

Wtf 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27783932)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 29th, 2015 7:40 AM
Author: mustard awkward trailer park

Is one good lawyer's life worth the protection of scholarship?

Yes, yes it is.

*standing tall, head down and eyes closed, fist in the air, finally he opens his eyes*

"We fight on. For Shaddix. For the scholarship."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#27784054)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:18 PM
Author: mustard awkward trailer park



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656333)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:22 PM
Author: Dashing swollen organic girlfriend

1111888888880000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656371)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:23 PM
Author: Swashbuckling grizzly state

Did not read

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656383)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:29 PM
Author: Dashing swollen organic girlfriend

dont be intimidated as i was at 1st

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656433)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 1st, 2018 1:22 PM
Author: Cracking Tanning Salon Patrolman



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#36534384)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 1st, 2018 1:50 PM
Author: Blue sanctuary hunting ground



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#36534537)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:14 PM
Author: zombie-like theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#42234169)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:15 PM
Author: sepia brunch laser beams

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#42234173)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:18 PM
Author: Bonkers personal credit line



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#42234185)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:19 PM
Author: Soggy charismatic messiness



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656342)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:23 PM
Author: zombie-like theater

I was about to give the OP a 180 until I realized it was my thread.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656384)



Reply Favorite

Date: June 8th, 2016 8:30 PM
Author: Soggy charismatic messiness

Love it when that happens

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#30656444)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 28th, 2017 7:25 AM
Author: zombie-like theater



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#34787889)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 1st, 2018 1:16 PM
Author: mustard awkward trailer park



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#36534342)



Reply Favorite

Date: August 1st, 2018 2:00 PM
Author: cerebral light voyeur gas station



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#36534616)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 6th, 2021 10:14 PM
Author: Bonkers personal credit line



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=2866133&forum_id=2#42234166)