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NEED XOXOHTH HELP IMMEDIATELY
Poast new message in this thread
Date: March 19th, 2006 3:08 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I'm on IM with this hot girl who goes to a nearby uni. How do I ask her out? Need good lines fast!!!!
EDIT: this is NOT flame. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:09 AM Author: Cracking mahogany ape temple Don't get your hopes up. Send her a pic and see if she continues to talk. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372235) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:10 AM Author: Excitant Claret Brethren Philosopher-king correct (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372243) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:17 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center We know each other outside of uni. Met at a party and now I'm trying to follow up. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372272) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:09 AM Author: awkward dingle berry A few years ago, while browsing around the library downtown, I had to take a piss. As I entered the john a big beautiful all-american football hero type, about twenty-five, came out of one of the booths. I stood at the urinal looking at him out of the corner of my eye as he washed his hands. He didn't once look at me. He was "straight" and married -- and in any case I was sure I wouldn't have a chance with him.
As soon as he left I darted into the booth he'd vacated, hoping there might be a lingering smell of shit and even a seat still warm from his sturdy young ass. I found not only the smell but the shit itself. He'd forgotten to flush. And what a treasure he had left behind. Three or four beautiful specimens floated in the bowl. It apparently had been a fairly dry, constipated shit, for all were fat, stiff, and ruggedly textured.
The real prize was a great feast of turd -- a nine inch gastrointestinal triumph as thick as a man's wrist.
I knelt before the bowl, inhaling the rich brown fragrance and wondered if I should obey the impulse building up inside me. I'd always been a heavy rimmer and had lapped up more than one little clump of shit, but that had been just an inevitable part of eating ass and not an end in itself. Of course I'd had jerk-off fantasies of devouring great loads of it (what rimmer hasn't), but I had never done it. Now, here I was, confronted with the most beautiful five-pound turd I'd ever feasted my eyes on, a sausage fit to star in any fantasy and one I knew to have been hatched from the asshole of the world's handsomest young stud.
Why not? I plucked it from the bowl, holding it with both hands to keep it from breaking. I lifted it to my nose. It smelled like rich, ripe limburger (horrid, but thrilling), yet had the consistency of cheddar. What is cheese anyway but milk turning to shit without the benefit of a digestive tract? I gave it a lick and found that it tasted better then it smelled. I've found since then that shit nearly almost does.
I hesitated no longer. I shoved the fucking thing as far into my mouth as I could get it and sucked on it like a big brown cock, beating my meat like a madman. I wanted to completely engulf it and bit off a large chunk, flooding my mouth with the intense, bittersweet flavor. To my delight I found that while the water in the bowl had chilled the outside of the turd, it was still warm inside. As I chewed I discovered that it was filled with hard little bits of something I soon identified as peanuts. He hadn't chewed them carefully and they'd passed through his body virtually unchanged. I ate it greedily, sending lump after peanutty lump sliding scratchily down my throat. My only regret was the donor of this feast wasn't there to wash it down with his piss.
I soon reached a terrific climax. I caught my cum in the cupped palm of my hand and drank it down. Believe me, there is no more delightful combination of flavors than the hot sweetness of cum with the rich bitterness of shit.
Afterwards I was sorry that I hadn't made it last longer. But then I realized that I still had a lot of fun in store for me. There was still a clutch of virile turds left in the bowl. I tenderly fished them out, rolled them into my hankerchief, and stashed them in my briefcase. In the week to come I found all kinds of ways to eat the shit without bolting it right down. Once eaten it's gone forever unless you want to filch it third hand out of your own asshole. Not an unreasonable recourse in moments of desperation or simple boredom. I stored the turds in the refrigerator when I was not using them but within a week they were all gone. The last one I held in my mouth without chewing, letting it slowly dissolve. I had liquid shit trickling down my throat for nearly four hours. I must have had six orgasms in the process.
I often think of that lovely young guy dropping solid gold out of his sweet, pink asshole every day, never knowing what joy it could, and at least once did, bring to a grateful shiteater. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:34 AM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting maude - if you tell your friends stories like this, is it any wonder they don't want to hang out with you and listen to your stories? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372611) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:09 AM Author: Concupiscible double fault so, im usually not so forthright, but i really think youre a cute girl, and we should go for some coffee sometime. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372238) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:10 AM Author: awkward dingle berry she knows she's cute and that he knows she's cute. he should tell her she's really interesting, smart etc. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372241) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:11 AM Author: Concupiscible double fault i guess. i usually dont do cutsy lines anyway. im not good at this type of stuff. i basically just say "ive been thinking that im going to take you out for *inset activity here*, ill pick you up at *insert time here*" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372247) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:12 AM Author: awkward dingle berry if a guy said "I'm going to take you [here]" I'd tell him to fuck off (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372253) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:13 AM Author: topaz motley sound barrier police squad haha, yes. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372255) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:13 AM Author: Concupiscible double fault thats because you have a stick up your ass and like pussy ass bitches. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372258) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:12 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, now how do I respond?
Me: So, I'm usually not so forthright, but I really think you're a cute girl, and we should go for some coffee sometime.
Her: haha...so why arent you usually forthright? is there something i should know about before we meet? :-p |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:13 AM Author: awkward dingle berry she sounds like a dingbat. enjoy bubbly vapid sex, and the resulting STD. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372257) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:14 AM Author: topaz motley sound barrier police squad if you can't think of something to say over AIM, how will you get through a date with her? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372259) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:16 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I'm not quick over the computer. Usually I just point out/talk about stuff that we both can see. Can't do that over AIM. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372266) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:35 AM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting do you read billboards to your girlfriends? "Oh look - there's a radio shack over there!" |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:11 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I only saw this now.
No, douchebag, I usually just keep my mouth shut on dates and let HER do the talking. Sometimes I'll point out something interesting (like people in funny clothes) and then she talks. That doesn't work online. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 12:30 PM Author: spectacular cerise pocket flask goal in life for some reason this is absolutely hilarious to me (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5373384) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:14 AM Author: Concupiscible double fault im just not good at expressing my feelings sometimes, thats all. typical macho guy stuff. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372261) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:10 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office I am HLS bound. I will make 2M/year as a partner at XYZ law firm. Do you want to get dinner sometime? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372240) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:15 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Me: So, I'm usually not so forthright, but I really think you're a cute girl, and we should go for some coffee sometime.
Her: haha...so why arent you usually forthright? is there something i should know about before we meet? :-p
Me: I am HLS bound. I will make 2M/year as a partner at Watchell. So now you wanna go?
Her: whats hls?
Her: or i COULD just date someone whos already making 2m/year, no? ;-) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:16 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center HELP!!! Now what do I say??? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372268) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:17 AM Author: topaz motley sound barrier police squad ok, flame. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372270) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:19 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Come on! This is not a flame.
Me: HLS = Harvard Law School
Her: oh cool. so you wanna go east?
Me: Yeah.
Her: ah. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:19 AM Author: awkward dingle berry Me: but not before I give you a ride on my love shaft (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372281) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:21 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: ah
Me: But not before I give you a ride on my love shaft.
Her: ...
Her: your love shaft? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:23 AM Author: awkward dingle berry Me: feel free to rename it whatever you like. I'd suggest "The King" or "Braveheart" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372303) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:23 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: your love shaft?
Me: Do you know where I can buy a wallaby?
Her: is that what you call your love shaft?
Fuck, now what do I say? How can I turn this around? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:24 AM Author: awkward dingle berry Me: sorry, i'mf drukn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372312) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:25 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: is that what you call your love shaft?
Me: Feel free to rename it whatever you like. I'd suggest "The King" or "Braveheart"
Her: lol
Her: braveheart???
Her: so your love shaft is a scottish nationalist? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:26 AM Author: awkward dingle berry abort operation AIMLOVE, I repeat, abort
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:26 AM Author: Maize Base this is exactly how my dad met my mom (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372329) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:29 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: so your love shaft is a scottish nationalist?
Me: Well, I can introduce him to you and you can figure out for yourself.
Her: thanx but im gonna pass
Me: Yeah, well, you're pretty cute
Me: For a girl on the Internet
Her: haha
Her: you mean im a porn star? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:33 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: cat got your tongue?
FUCK I NEED HELP!!! I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:34 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: cat got your tongue?
Me: No. I'm just busy with something right now.
Her: oh
Her: sure
COME ON XOXOHTH, HELP ME OUT HERE! |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:38 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: sure
Me: You have potential.
Her: for what?
Me: Well, let's go for coffee and we can talk about it.
OK, I think I'm back. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:44 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Me: Well, let's go for coffee and we can talk about it.
Her: i dont know
Her: im kinda busy lately
Her: you know, school
Me: Oh cool. So what have you been up to?
Her: psych midterm
Me: Midterms this late?
Her: yeah
Her: actually we have three during the semester
Me: Oh cool. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:46 AM Author: heady turquoise office stop responding to yourself; post on far left. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372419) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:47 AM Author: heady turquoise office tell her your dad's a pyschologist. and then tell her what he thinks about his job. any bullshit will do. she'll then start talking about why she's interested in it, etc...if she doesn't, you can ask her
(i'm assuming she's a pysch major) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:49 AM Author: glassy bat shit crazy theater stain ... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372434) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:35 AM Author: beady-eyed high-end point shitlib You: can you do me a favor? her: sure, what? You: theres this really annoying/lame person talking to me on aim ...what can i say to them as an excuse as to why i can no longer chat? Her: _____ you: (repeate what she just said) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:36 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Oh, come on...be serious. I want to go out with this girl!
It's getting fucking awkward. She knows I'm not busy. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:17 AM Author: awkward dingle berry she's a smarty, watch out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372273) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:20 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Yeah, I know. She just keeps coming back. I need help on this one. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372283) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:11 AM Author: topaz motley sound barrier police squad tip: don't use "lines". (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372245) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:12 AM Author: Concupiscible double fault exactly. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372249) |
Date: March 19th, 2006 3:11 AM Author: translucent foreskin You feel that your mother never really loved you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372248) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:12 AM Author: effete den you: i'm feeling a little down...
her: why?
you: my dick just died...
you: can i bury it in your ass?
her: immediately |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:17 AM Author: crystalline unholy set national security agency Tell her you have a friend who wants to buy a strange pet. Ask her if she knows where you can buy a wallaby. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372269) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:20 AM Author: house-broken library haha wtf (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372282) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:22 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, I'll try this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372298) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:25 AM Author: crystalline unholy set national security agency Then insult her slightly, or give her a mixed compliment. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372318) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:25 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Like how? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372324) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:26 AM Author: crystalline unholy set national security agency Tell her she's pretty cute, for a girl on the Internet. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372333) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:30 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, OK, I just did. Now what? (See above) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372350) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:22 AM Author: Maize Base a pale imitation (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372301) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:32 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Of what? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372361) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:32 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center COME ON HELP ME OUT GUYS!!!!! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372358) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:34 AM Author: translucent foreskin afer a long silence, say
"i rape" |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:35 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Come on, don't be an ass. I need help here. Just cut me a break, OK?
What should I say? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:36 AM Author: translucent foreskin i think that if you want to meet you should just keep making lame jokes and stress common points of interest. Don't appear to eager to meet. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372381) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:38 AM Author: heady turquoise office at least talk about stupid shit while you're waiting for xoxo advice. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372389) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:41 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, OK...I'm just ridiculously nervous. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372402) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:39 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center All right, how do I keep from looking eager? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372395) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:44 AM Author: heady turquoise office copy and paste your conv and i'll supply the lame jokes. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372410) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:46 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Thanks!
http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372411 |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:36 AM Author: heady turquoise office You: You have potential (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372379) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:37 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, I like this. Sounds confident. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372383) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:39 AM Author: heady turquoise office it was supposed to be a response to her "so now i'm a porn star?" (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372394) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:40 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Oh. Damn it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372397) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:41 AM Author: heady turquoise office use it anyway and update us (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372401) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:47 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372422) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:43 AM Author: crystalline unholy set national security agency Post a pic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372406) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:48 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I only know her MySpace, but it has all sorts of personal details too. I'm not gonna out her; there can be some sick fucks on xoxo. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372429) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:50 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Post the pic without posting the profile. Right click on the pic, go to properties and copy/paste the url that has .jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372437) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:35 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center How do I do this on a Mac laptop? No right-click... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372619) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:50 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Me: Oh cool.
Me: My dad's a psychologist.
Her: oh cool.
What do I do now? My dad isn't a psychologist, so now I'm lying to her. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:51 AM Author: heady turquoise office see my edit
edit: tell her your dad's a pyschologist. and then tell her what he thinks about his job. any bullshit will do. she'll then start talking about why she's interested in it, etc...if she doesn't, you can ask her
(i'm assuming she's a pysch major)
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:55 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, I got it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372468) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:52 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office I majored in psychology in college. I wanted to get a Ph.D., but then realized that it was a worthless degree. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372449) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:01 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Why do you think a Ph.D in it is worthless? You could do other jobs with it other than academia. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372496) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:52 AM Author: glassy bat shit crazy theater stain Tell her coffee is a performance enhancer...so if she wants to do well in the test she should drink some with you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372450) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:54 AM Author: floppy stage community account F- (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372460) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:55 AM Author: heady turquoise office not bad but i wouldnt say this until the end of the conversation. first, he needs to establish some rapport. another lame come on is not going to change her mind
the conversation is mundane enough that this might not be flame...
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:57 AM Author: heady turquoise office you need to get her to talk about herself (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372477) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:53 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Me: Did you know coffee is a performance enhancer?
Her: i cant study with coffee
Her: caffeine gives me a headache. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:54 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office So is adderall...I can get you some. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372458) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:56 AM Author: heady turquoise office this is good. "we could do some lines together instead"
bad edit. cocaine was better. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 3:54 AM Author: glassy bat shit crazy theater stain ... (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372462) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:00 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Post the pic without posting the profile. Right click on the pic, go to properties and copy/paste the url that has .jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372490) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:01 AM Author: heady turquoise office This will catch the boards interest and you'll get more and quicker responses (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372497) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:05 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Are you sure this won't out her? That would totally blow. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372511) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:07 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Of course not. We post pics of tons of random different girls everyday. It doesn't out them.
http://myspace-383.vo.llnwd.net/00545/38/37/545527383_l.jpg |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:03 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: i cant study with coffee
Her: caffeine gives me a headache.
Me: My dad finds his job really tiring. Talking to patients all day can be really stressful, you know.
Her: hmm...i guess.
Her: but it is nice to be there for people. it must be rewarding to make such a difference in someones life.
Me: Oh yeah, sure.
Her: plus the way the brain works is really interesting. sometimes even compeletly counterintuitive. like you wouldnt expect at all. people are puzzles, you know.
Me: Totally agree.
Me: So what do you like most about psychology? The whole puzzle factor?
Her: yeah, i guess. opportunities for self-knowledge, you know.
Me: Well, you can get self-knowledge with coffee!
Her: lol
Her: youre really big on coffee.
Me: If you wanna chill at a bar sometime...
Her: ah, i see where this is headed. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:04 AM Author: heady turquoise office stop sucking her dick
you're fucked but next time challenge her in some way...something like, "i don't know, i don't know if my dad really gets anything done. most of the people he sees don't want to change." it stupid, but that's okay. it sounds like you're being honest and your challenging her a little. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:07 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I was trying to make small talk. This is why I need help. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372518) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:11 AM Author: heady turquoise office we're here for you. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372539) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:05 AM Author: heady turquoise office what kind of self-knowledge has come to you through your studies? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372512) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:09 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, this is good. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372529) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:13 AM Author: heady turquoise office what does she want to do after she gets her degree? most pysch majors i know don't want to become pyschologists (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372545) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:20 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams So what do they want to do or what do they end up doing? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372558) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:13 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Post the pic already dood. We post pics of tons of random different girls everyday. It doesn't out them.
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:15 AM Author: heady turquoise office who the fuck is on xoxo this late anyway? by morning this thread will be lost to history.
edit: post the pic and then delete it a couple of minutes later. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:34 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, but how do I do this on an iMac? I can't right-click or anything. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372615) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:39 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center n/m...I figured it out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372633) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:18 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: ah, i see where this is headed.
Me: So what kind of self-knowledge did you get from your studies?
Her: um, do you really care?
Her: or are you just trying to pick me up again?
Me: No, no...I mean, if you still want to go to coffee, that's cool.
Her: sure
Me: But no, I really wanted to know.
Her: you're not just going to snore through this?
Me: Of course not.
Me: I grew up with psychology, so I always have a soft spot for it.
Her: ok, well, we're studying learning strategies in class. we had this test battery to determine our learning style. anyway im in the "auditory/tactile" category. meaning that i can absorb material really well in a lecture, but also pretty good with hands-on stuff. visual, not so much. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:20 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office tell her your learning style (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372556) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:22 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I don't know my learning style! I just read the material and ace the fucking tests. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372567) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:23 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office You are the opposite of auditory. You learn from books, not lectures. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372570) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:23 AM Author: heady turquoise office take note of this and then you can make some jokes about being "pretty good with handson learning" after you sleep with her.
ask her what she wants to do with pysch, what else she's interested in, etc. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:28 AM Author: heady turquoise office You: Are you more into music than say, photography or painting? I wonder if there's a relationship (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372587) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:25 AM Author: translucent foreskin Send her your pic:
http://img.cybernetentertainment.com//imagedb//3490/i/s/410/21.jpg |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:31 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: ok, well, we're studying learning strategies in class. we had this test battery to determine our learning style. anyway im in the "auditory/tactile" category. meaning that i can absorb material really well in a lecture, but also pretty good with hands-on stuff. visual, not so much.
Me: So what do you want do with your degree?
Her: thinking about education
Me: Cool. What level? Like academia, research?
Her: maybe child development specialty or elementary education
Me: I'm a visual learner. I don't get so much from the lectures.
Me: More of just reading the book, taking the test, you know.
Her: damn, i wish i could do that.
Her: would save me the trouble of dragging myself to lectures.
Me: lol
Me: Well, I still go to lectures. I just draw pictures there.
Her: haha
Her: well hopefully you're not being disruptive to those of us who DO need to go.
Me: Oh, no, of course not.
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:36 AM Author: heady turquoise office Me: Well, I still go to lectures. I just draw pictures there.
good!
You: what other kinds of classes do you like? ceramics? (if you're good with your hands) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:38 AM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting dood, don't im all your conversational material; save it for your irl conversation with her. tell her you have to get up early to go mountain climbing (or something else cool and athletic) and arrange to meet irl. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:40 AM Author: heady turquoise office she won't meet him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372634) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:41 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams The OP is like His Doodness. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372636) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:51 AM Author: heady turquoise office this guy doesn't seem very laid-back. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372653) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:41 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Subject: pic http://myspace-383.vo.llnwd.net/00545/38/37/545527383_l.jpg (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372637) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:45 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Nice dood. How much experience do you have with chicks- dating and relationships? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372642) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:59 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Not much. Usually I'm all right, because I'm fairly good-looking (not being vain; it's just something girls have told me), but I'm a hopeless geek, so it all falls apart if I have to rely on my convo skills.
What's frustrating is that I know she likes me, but I can't seem to get it together. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:46 AM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting you are a lucky motherfucker she seems like she'd be really cool irl |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:49 AM Author: heady turquoise office i was just about to post something like that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372651) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:02 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center She is. That's why it's so frustrating. I really do like her, but I have no idea how to do this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372669) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:53 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams He needs to tell us more about this chick. If she's a slut, he should be able to get her to go for coffee. If she's not, she could get angry at him with his references to sex before they've ever gone out on a date. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372657) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:20 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center She doesn't seem like the slutty type. Flirty and funny, but she has a kinda conservative streak too. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372680) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:52 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: well hopefully you're not being disruptive to those of us who DO need to go.
Me: Oh, no, of course not.
Her: ok thats good.
Her: otherwise you would be officially annoying.
Me: Not unless you get in knots over doddling.
Her: oh no
Me: So you prefer music to, I don't know, photography?
Her: if i can hear the lecture, it's all cool
Her: OMG, yes! i looooove music.
Her: my roomies and i get together for dance parties before going out on weekends.
Her: good fun
Me: Awesome.
Her: you a good dancer?
Me: I could use some practice.
Me: Years of being a wallflower, I guess.
Her: no, you should be really good then.
Her: being a visual learner and all... ;-p
Me: haha |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:54 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Ask her if she could teach you to become a better dancer. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372658) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:56 AM Author: heady turquoise office don't do it! he's come on to her too many times tongiht. she's just started to loosen up again; this would set him back (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372662) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:58 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams But this would allow him to spend some time with her. They would be able to focus on the dancing so he wouldn't need to think of things to talk about. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372663) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:01 AM Author: heady turquoise office edit: on second thought, you're probably right.
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:17 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Fuck, now I wished I'd gone with this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372677) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:55 AM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting She likes you man. You're in. sign off now before you type something stupid. arrange a meetup first. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:58 AM Author: heady turquoise office she already rejected him re: coffee twice. i think he should wait until he talks to her again. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372664) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 4:55 AM Author: heady turquoise office You: what kind of music do you like
is the obvious one |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:15 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Her: being a visual learner and all... ;-p
Me: haha
Me: So what kind of music do you like?
Her: you mean to listen or just to dance?
Me: Well, what kind of music do you and your roomies have for your dance parties?
Her: whatever has a good beat, i guess.
Me: Salsa?
Her: haha
Her: yeah salsas cool.
Me: It's a dance and a condiment at the same time.
Me: We should have more dances that are named after condiments.
Her: mustard doesnt make a good dance name.
Me: Well, the Salt and Pepper could work.
Her: sounds like a midlife crisis
Her: ;-p
Her: nah its just that salt and pepper is a little cliched
Me: Well, people could do the Relish.
Her: haha
Her: omg, that was so dorky and funny at the same time.
Me: You have an odd sense of humor.
Her: yeah i laugh at the most random things.
Me: Are you like the person who breaks out in laughter at funerals or something like that?
Me: You know, really inappropriate times. Like a kid gets hit with an ambulance and you're on the side just giggling like crazy?
Her: um, no.
Her: im not sick.
Me: Oh, no, that's not what I was saying...
Me: Never mind.
Shit, did I just screw it up AGAIN? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:17 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office you: it's a dance and a condiment at the same time
KILL SELF |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:20 AM Author: heady turquoise office stfu (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372681) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:18 AM Author: heady turquoise office the next time you're doing that well (at the Relish point), tell her you have to go, and then after she takes her exam, ask how she did, schmooze a little, and THEN ask her out. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372679) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:22 AM Author: heady turquoise office say something like, "you probably have a lot of studying to do tomorrow so i should let you go. are you studying for anything besides pysch this weekend?"
go off on a tangent somewhere for a couple of minutes and then sign off.
just don't end it her giggling over a dead child's body. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:25 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Fuck, so I'm dead in the water? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372683) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:27 AM Author: heady turquoise office no, you're actually doing pretty well. most guys are idiots and/or bad at this so her expectations probably aren't that high. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372687) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:34 AM Author: heady turquoise office you don't need to get a date out of your first IM conversation. unless the discourse at your party was intense or if you made out or something, i wouldn't recommend it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372695) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:26 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Are you still talking to her? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372684) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:38 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Yeah. I need damage control and fast. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372715) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:26 AM Author: heady turquoise office "You know, really inappropriate times. Like a kid gets hit with an ambulance and you're on the side just giggling like crazy?"
I had a similiar reaction when I saw an old woman die. True story. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:32 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit you fucked this up too much already (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372693) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:34 AM Author: Tantric chad native if she's white, then tell her you're black. white women are natutally attracted to black men. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372698) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:37 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center She already knows I'm white. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372710) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:40 AM Author: Tantric chad native then there's nothing we can do for you. it's over. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372725) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:36 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Subject: HOLY FUCK I'M GETTING LIFEPWN3D...FUCK Me: Oh, no, that's not what I was saying...
Me: Never mind.
Me: I'm sorry.
Me: That was stupid.
Her: it was.
Me: I say stupid things a lot. Especially when I get really nervous and stuff.
Her: so when youre nervous you talk about kids getting hit by ambulances?
Me: Yeah, I guess so. Because I'm stupid.
Me: Can we just change the subject?
Her: by change the subject do you mean awkwardly ask me out for a date again?
Her: because the answer is no.
Me: Has it been that annoying?
Her: yes
Me: Oh.
Me: Sorry.
Her: i mean, youre a nice guy and all, but you've been asking me for coffee like the aflac duck.
Her: i feel like youre trying to pressure me into something.
Her: even though i like you.
Her: and i think you can be a really sweet guy.
Me: Oh no, I totally can.
Her: im not so sure now. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:38 AM Author: Tantric chad native it's your ethnicity. tell her youre not white. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372712) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:38 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit leave, gameover (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372713) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:39 AM Author: heady turquoise office you're being idiotic. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372719) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:40 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit you probably get no play fag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372723) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:42 AM Author: Tantric chad native haha, pwn3d! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372729) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:44 AM Author: heady turquoise office he says i get no play and i'm a fag and therefore i'm pwn3d? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372737) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:47 AM Author: heady turquoise office calm down. she obviously likes him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372743) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:48 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit there was some kind of initial attraction, but what was there is now destroyed. shes probably a nice person (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372747) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:54 AM Author: heady turquoise office if it wasn't destroyed as of your post, his ending just destroyed it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372769) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:39 AM Author: heady turquoise office she's awesome. how often are girls this honest? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372717) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:39 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office Give up and say that you will IM her some other time. Wait at least five days.
Asking advice from XOXOHTH was your first mistake. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:40 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit tell her bye and you will IM her tomorrow, but dont IM her until 5 days (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372721) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:40 AM Author: heady turquoise office Good advice. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372722) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:41 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Back to dancing...Say that you'd like to get better at dancing. Tell her that since she is good at dancing, if she would be able to teach you how to get better at it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372728) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:42 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit this is fucking GAY ADVICE which will make her know hes trying to pick her up (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372730) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:48 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams But it's a reason for them to spend time together. She already knows he's trying to pick her up with his messed up coffee attempts. Won't she be more likely to want to see him if she thinks she could teach him something? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372746) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:49 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit maybe, but still, its too obvious hes faking the whole oh what are you in to blah blah blah because in the back of her mind she knows he is just trying to score a date. that is the bottom line. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372749) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:42 AM Author: heady turquoise office horrible advice. she feels "pressured." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372731) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:50 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams He's been pressuring her about coffee at different times in this conversation when it didn't fit well in the conversation to ask. The conversation can't get any worse so he might as well suggest the dancing. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372755) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:42 AM Author: Tantric chad native good idea, but he's white. white and dancing dont mix. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372732) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:44 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit The Problem: You took yourself out of control over her. You made youself sound like a wimp, a wussy, someone who is nervous and indecisive. You made yourself sound needy, creepy/psychotic, and desperate. You committed suicide, now get the fuck out of there. This was most likely her first opinion of you. It will last. It is very hard to change how a woman feels for a man, especially after such extensive damage. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:45 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit but.. Do you want to go kamikaze and see what can happen? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372740) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:48 AM Author: heady turquoise office he did that in the beginning and it fucked things up. ignoring her for 5 days or so will show her that he has self-control, and that's what he needs to demonstrate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372748) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:50 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit http://xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&mc=171&forum_id=2#5372721 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372752) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:49 AM Author: Violent aphrodisiac mediation FLAME - this is a copycat of a REAL thread that was much better. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372750) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:50 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit yeah i think it IS flame but w/e (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372753) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:53 AM Author: heady turquoise office what's "w/e"? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372760) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:53 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit whatever confirmed: you probably dont talk with girls |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:55 AM Author: heady turquoise office w/e. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372773) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:54 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Look, this isn't flame. If some other thread did this before me, whatever. I was just looking for advice since the people on this board seem pretty quick/funny.
Right now, I'm so depressed that I screwed it up. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:52 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Me: Oh no, I totally can.
Her: im not so sure now.
Me: Look, I'm nervous around you, all right? I don't always say stupid things, I just say stupid things to you because you make me feel different.
Me: I don't know. Maybe you have effect on people, [her name]. I'm sorry. I couldn't help being stupid around you.
Her: so first you assume i laugh at automobile accidents and now i kill the intelligence of everyone around me.
Me: Oh come on, that's not fair.
Her: you sure know how to make a girl feel special.
Her: look, im really tired right now and i need to get some rest.
Me: I'm sorry I couldn't give you all the glib one-liners you need before we could just have a cup of coffee together. I can't be as charming or smooth or fake as the other players out there.
Her: can we just drop it already? im getting a headache right now.
Me: OK, well, I hope you have sweet dreams.
Her: thanx
<logs off>
FUCK |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:53 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit you made it even worse fag (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372761) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:53 AM Author: Tantric chad native its over. your only hope is to start insulting her. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372762) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:54 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit TITCR (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372768) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:53 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office Your responses were terrible. Maybe you should wait until she doesn't remember who you are. It doesn't matter; elementary education is not prestigious. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372764) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:00 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Look, I'm feeling bad as it is already. Do you have rub salt in it?
I wasn't looking for prestige. I was just wanted to date a hot girl.
FUCK |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:04 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office She doesn't seem like your type anyway. If you are having trouble maybe it is because all you are trying to do is date a hot girl. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372796) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:05 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit wrong mindset (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372798) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:09 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Who? Zinafedel or me?
If this is another cheap shot at my expense, give me your home address so I can kick your ass.
EDIT: Fuck, I'm too depressed to do that either. I feel so fucking stupid. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:58 AM Author: heady turquoise office *sobs* (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372783) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:59 AM Author: translucent foreskin Wow dude. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372786) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:05 AM Author: house-broken library wow, sorry dude (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372800) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 12:00 PM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting Subject: what did I tell you dood?!? you talked yourself into a hole. Date: March 19th, 2006 4:55 AM Author: dmferry
She likes you man. You're in.
sign off now before you type something stupid.
arrange a meetup first.
(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372659)
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:58 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit next time remember these points: be cocky, but funny dont be desperate at all dont be needy or overly emotional BE a man its ok to disagree dont be a doormat take charge get her # asap dont talk so much online bonus tip - once you get her number, say you will call her soon, wait like 3 days though, and schedule for a day mon-thurs. dont question my ways, just trust me |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 5:59 AM Author: heady turquoise office as much as i hate to say this, that's all good advice.
edit:also, you should never be thinking about just one girl. if you're not that experienced, start with friendships and if you're as attractive as you say you are, it'll be easy to move past the friendship stage. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:02 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office TITCR (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372793) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:05 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Damn it, I did it all wrong!
I'm so fucking pissed off with myself right now. I was doing well, I knew it.
Why did I ever stop talking about Relish?
So I don't talk to her for 5 days? Then what? I'm not a good talker. I'm OK irl because my silence can come off as cool indifference, but over phone/IM, I get into a fucking nervous wreck as shown above. Fuck fuck fuck. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:11 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit Subject: this is golden : u should keep IM/phone to minimum anyway. use it to schedule things. another tip: anticipation is the shit. this is what i did once-i told this girl i was going to draw her a picture. she said of what? i said i know what it is but i cant tell her. shes like oh will it be of something special we shared tonight? i said stop questioning my ways, im an artist. later on it was like a month and i still didnt do it. she said so what about the drawing? i told her great works often take years to complete, and she shouldnt question my ways. she did something later on like prematurely hang up for some reason on the phone, so i told her she owned me big time. i asked how u gonna repay me, she said i could have anything i wanted. i said i know exactly what i want, but i cant tell her now, i will tell her when i send her the drawing (a msg will be with it). with it i wrote, make me a necklace for the summer (shes in to that kind of stuff). and since thatd be letting you off too easy, you always talk about your thongs to me, so send me a picture of you in them and make sure its a nice pair. she was all too happy to oblige and sent me more than 1 picture. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:23 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center This wasn't golden. It was humiliating. I feel like I've been castrated in front of the entire fucking board.
It's my fault, of course, and there's no point in getting pissed off about it. I still am though.
Thank you for the tip on anticipation. I will keep that in mind for the future. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 12:02 PM Author: blue blathering home famous landscape painting "u should keep IM/phone to minimum anyway. use it to schedule things. " this is so fucken credited, and what I tried to tell him from the start. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:11 AM Author: heady turquoise office Honestly, take ill kid's advice and start talking to as many attractive girls as you can. Think of them as "friends." You're putting to much pressure on yourself to get a date and it shows. Once you're talking to multiple girls that you're interested in, you won't seem as desperate-- because you won't be, you'll have another girl to turn to. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372809) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:14 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit Im an ill ass motherfucker, and I approve this message (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372814) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:31 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center OK, I think I can do that. The problem is that I have a lot of hot/attractive girls who are "friends" with me, but anytime we ever try to take it to the relationship level, I screw it up. Case in point: this thread.
And I'll be totally honest: When I like a girl, I don't want to go through that whole series of platonic gestures. I just want to have intercourse with her as soon as possible. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:38 AM Author: heady turquoise office How do you screw things up IRL? I thought you were just bad on IM/phone (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372836) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:45 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center I said conversation-wise, since there are other things to do besides talk irl. I still do stupid things like trip over myself (esp. dancing, which is why I tend to the "wallflower" mode) and forget her birthday, sometimes her name. Getting lost while driving is another one, forgetting times for dates (getting better with that now that I bought a watch). Bad memory tends to be the worst problem. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372841) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:46 AM Author: heady turquoise office See ill kid's thread on how not to screw it up.
Do you flirt with your "friends"? Make sure there's some sexual tension there.
Alcohol helps too, in so many ways.
EDIT: haven't seen 'beautiful mind.' |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:54 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center FUCK you I am isquoting from beautiful mind OK? because I"m a DRUNK LONELY FUCKING MATH MAJOR OK? I don' t rea d Pla tobecause the math major CANNOT read and has no FUCKING SEX except for John nash.
FUCK HIM |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:00 AM Author: heady turquoise office haha. sorry. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372856) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:09 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center no man I"M sorr you were ther efor me tonite and I just tScrewed it up. fuci I can type anymlre cause I AM fucking drunk. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372869) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:50 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams When John Nash saw a chick in a bar, he went up to har and he was straight forward in asking her if she'd like to have sexual intercourse with him. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372844) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:59 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center ye s and then she slap hm and he tells HER about the nash equibrum and hat was the roundation of the nash box in economics an dbame theo ry
FUCK F UCK FUC K FUCK FUCK FUCK FJCK
I want a nother chance FUCK screwed it all up fuck ing up AG AIN@ |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:03 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office Yes. Next time just talk about math all the time. Explain the Gauss-Bonet theorem. Tell her about the proof you are working on. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372862) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:25 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center FUCK MATH FUCK PROOF FUC K GREAST C URVWTURE |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:41 AM Author: multi-colored pearly locale laser beams Why Monday-Thursday? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372837) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:44 AM Author: provocative coral orchestra pit women are paranoid, they over-analyze everything especially when it comes to relationships. by keeping it mon-thurs she will think things like: "why did he not ask me for saturday or friday? Am I not good enough for that?" "Am I not his main attraction?" "Is there another women for those days?" If it WERE saturday or friday, she would KNOW shes the main thing for his social lfie at that point. Women like men who are wanted, mysterious. They like selective men because then it makes them feel a cut above the other women. Women are jealous creature. If you ever want to make a woman feel good, tell her how much better looking she is than her friends. It will also trigger things in her making the man seem less desperate and needy. Therefore, the man becomes the SELECTOR and the woman the person going after the man. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 6:50 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center This make sense. I just read over con voagain after downing two shots. I definite ly need to assume a more active role.
I took Mr. Nice Guy out the back alley and shot him. The postmorte mshowed no spine and no guts. |
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Date: March 20th, 2006 2:52 AM Author: pungent free-loading marketing idea station Wrong. This is only good for the average girl. This specific girl already liked the douchey personality of HLSBound and he fucked it up by trying to be something he wasn't. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5379716) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:19 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house Hey, what's her IM screen name? She looks pretty hot and I'm gonna try my luck with her. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372879) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:28 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center FUCK YOU (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372884) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:49 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house Yeah, that's great, but I really am more interested in fucking your friend. I'm sorry you're getting rejected again, but we can't all get laid. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372899) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:57 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Go to hell y ou usele sss historognath befor I KI CK your a s (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372906) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:08 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house Easy up, old boy. Now, you're obviously a smart guy, so I'm going to explain my plan to you. This is your first time online with her, I gather. So just tell her that your friend Jerry found her SN written down somewhere and played a prank on you. Then show how clever, charming, etc. you really can be.
I'll even tell you what. I can do the conversation part for you (a la Cyrano de Bergerac, who woos the beautiful Roxanne on behalf of the handsome, but inarticulate, Christian). Just give me her screenname; cut and paste it in reply and we can put our plan into action. You can have that second chance! |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:24 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center Wi ll this work? Pl ease say you are nots hitting me (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372922) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:30 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house No, I'm completely serious. I would be happy to help you. I totally understand where you're coming from, but the situation can be remedied. Don't listen to these other guys who say wait five days. Let's fix the situation right now.
I was ribbing you earlier, but now I'm being genuine.
EDIT: Just post her SN and then delete it right after I reply, OK? |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:38 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372932) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:44 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house Wow, actually she's still on-line. She has an away message, though:
"*sigh* why do nice guys end up being the most pushy?"
See, she was still thinking about you. Now once she's back, I can set everything straight in an off-hand, casual way. Don't worry about it. I'm here for you now, my friend. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 8:54 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372943) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 9:00 AM Author: Racy idiotic step-uncle's house Subject: PWN3D! To complete your pwnage for the evening, I just sent your potential date a link to this thread. Also, nice try with deletion:
"Date: March 19th, 2006 8:38 AM Author: HLSbound
Wo w man yo u are the best I agre e Take act ion now~
her AIM is
jellyjellygurl62"
EDIT: I also took the precaution of downloading this whole thread, just in case you attempt a mass post deletion. Don't bother. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 9:02 AM Author: Fishy Thirsty Round Eye Box Office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372952) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:25 AM Author: pungent free-loading marketing idea station obvious flame because the previous thread used almost the exact same title.
"Me: So, I'm usually not so forthright, but I really think you're a cute girl, and we should go for some coffee sometime.
Her: haha...so why arent you usually forthright? is there something i should know about before we meet? :-p"
This was yours to lose retard. She wanted to meet but you scared her off by being a moron. Then again, she's kinda bitchy so fuck her.
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Date: March 19th, 2006 7:40 AM Author: Autistic scourge upon the earth center WHat pervious thread? If thisw as fucking falme I wo uld be FUCKING LA ID at the end of thRead. |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 9:47 AM Author: Olive Talented Forum Knife A girl like this could be sold on someone in less than 10 minutes of IMing. The OP is woefully bad at the sort of verbal sparring that turns this type of girl on. The first time I read this thread I felt for him. Now I just shake my head at his ineptitude....he had it, and let it slip away, and then auto-pwn3d. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5373007) |
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Date: March 20th, 2006 2:39 AM Author: pungent free-loading marketing idea station disagree. she already seemed sold on him and all he had to do was ride it out. Instead he tried to do a 180 personality-wise and got pwn3d. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5379662) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 9:36 AM Author: mind-boggling jew casino i'm about to pass back out, mothafucka! (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5372993) |
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Date: March 19th, 2006 9:53 AM Author: Aromatic karate indian lodge B+ for effort (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5373016) |
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Date: March 20th, 2006 3:55 AM Author: Bateful gay wizard principal's office (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5379897) |
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Date: March 22nd, 2006 11:43 PM Author: Razzmatazz aggressive church telephone HLSbound is getting cocky. Think it's time to remind him of his royal pwnage on this board? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=382529&forum_id=2#5403550) |