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ITT: I defend The Beagle in lengthy screed
Poast new message in this thread
Date: April 20th, 2007 12:50 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house Unlike most dogs, The Beagle can count to 3. He does not stop at the second floor door when we live on the third, like some dumbass dogs I can mention. The Beagle is also capable of solving complex mathematical equations, but only when food is involved.
Furthermore, The Beagle's intelligence is superior to that of all xo posters, for the following reasons: 1)unlike the rest of us, he has found a way to do absolutely no work while having his every need provided for 2)he gets far more sex with white girls, asian girls, dog girls, cat girls, and at times the random female pillow, than any xo guy, girl, or androgynous poster 3)The Beagle does not post on xo.
TY |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 12:52 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=612321 (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967810) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 12:54 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house what the fuck is a westie? What kind of a fucking ttt dog has a breed I have never even heard of? If a westie was a country, it would be one of those ttt little countries that came about because no one wanted them to be a part of teir territory and was, upon creation, immediately forgotten due to the abysmal depths of its TTT status.
This educational announcement was brought to you by supporters of The Beagle. YWIA |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:02 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi sorry for your ignorance.
http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/top50.htm
wasties are a top 50 most popular breed.
http://www.dogbreedinfo.com/westhighland.htm |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:11 AM Author: Vibrant jade piazza degenerate for a small dog, westie's actually are quite tolerable and sweet.
they have confidence and intelligence of a german shepherd -- they just lack the perfect physical packaging, courage, unconditional love, and ability to scare the shit out of bad people. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:17 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi it's more my g/f's dog. i am looking into larger breeds and would like some type of molosser. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967993) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:19 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house pit bulls are the best larger breed. Second only to The Beagle (due to his inability to count to three) the pit bull is a dog of great intelligence, loyalty, and teeth. A lifelong companion and protector without the tendency to yip obnoxiously, almost never food agrressive, and an all around great dog. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968006) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:27 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi i was thinking more along the lines of a rott or an "american mastiff" (larger type). a pit is a def consideration, and she loves them.
but it'd have to wait until we move. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:30 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house Rotts are really great too. Most people assume that my pitt is purebred but some have said that she looks like she may have some rott in her, maybe a 1/4 or less. She has blackish brown fur and alittle of the coloring, although her accents are in white, not brown. And when I see pictures of rotts, I see them doing a lot of the same incredibly cute things that my dog does, like crossing their legs. And my dog and rottie females always look very feminine to me. They try to make their eyes look bigger so they are pretty, I think. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968076) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:12 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house 50? If this is the best defense you can marshal for the Inferior Westie, it is a sad breed of dog indeed. In fact, its only redeeming grace is that it happens to be just The Beagle's type. Their fluffy butts are, admittedly, quite humpable. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967960) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:15 AM Author: violent university messiness westie is a small white tough dog that BARKS ALL THE FUCKING TIME. plus if its mean owners keep it locked out of the house it will dig under the fence and come in your house through your doggie door and jump, mud covered, in your bed first thing in the morning. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:17 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi haha, some westies bark all of the time. that is the owners' fault and not the dog's, though. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967998) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 12:59 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house From the Danish Westie Home Page:
http://www.pgaa.com/canine/general/images/WESTIE010.jpg
Note the sad, pitiful state of the household pictured, where the owner was not able to acquire a Beagle, and is merely holding on to a picture of the Superior Beagle as his inferior Westiem, who is most likely not even capable of counting to three, is lolling around the house. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:04 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi some breeds make better projectiles than pets.
http://keithdevens.com/images/weblog/beagle4rm.jpeg
the beagle is one of them. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:08 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house The Beagle's ability to use his Dumbo ears to fly through the air is one of his most superior features, as everyone is well aware.
I notice your lack of a response to the cunting to three comment and accept it as the admission of inferiority of the Westie I know it was. ty. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:16 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi my dog does no cunting. but he can count to over 700. when we walk him, we let him walk ahead. he does not stop at a house in the 5 or 6 hundreds. he continues on to our house, in the 700's.
a good explanation for this ability to count much higher than the beagle can probably be attributed to each breed's history. whereas beagles often hunt in packs of over 30, westies are usually individual hunters and are capable of more. beagles generally exhibit an inability to think on their own and count beyond single digits. similarly, all they can really do is run or sniff. meanwhile, the westie is a genius that has developed problem-solving abilities to take advantage of his natural gifts. he has webbed feet to catch aquatic quarry; he is a natural digger for the burrowing types; he has a great sense of smell; and, perhaps most importantly, he exhibits the spirit and strength of a terrier and can back it up with an archetypal terrier "scissor" bite".
also, beagles are scenthounds and are often poorly-behaved and dirty, nasty creatures. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:18 AM Author: violent university messiness beagles are used to working in groups, while westies are loners, like the crazed azn killer. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968000) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:21 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi not true, mon amie. westies, due to their superior intellect, can make qualitative distinctions.
they much prefer human company. also, a wiki excerpt:
They are great companion dogs and get along with other animals, although care should be taken when introducing them to other domestic pets, such as cats. They also are compatible with children. Since Westies were originally bred as hunting dogs, they need to have room to run and play. They are not recommended as apartment dogs. If traveling they make great companions, since they can adjust easily to new situations and people and because of their small size. Westies will appreciate two or three walks each day.
They are very energetic but tire and need to take several naps per day. Like all dogs, the Westie responds better to love and gentleness than to cruelty. As with most terriers, harsh training methods are often met only with stubbornness. Westies are good with children, the elderly, and the disabled. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:24 AM Author: violent university messiness the terrier hunts by itself, mon ami. you can't be looking for guidance when you're killing rats in a burrow. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968041) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:29 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi i said the same thing above about westies hunting alone.
however, that is only part of the hunt. for the rest of the time, they are often near or with their human companion(s).
human interaction > interaction with a pack of stinky beagles. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:26 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house Eh, they're little white yippers. What more is there to say, really? The Beagle can really maul when necessary and has taken on a wolf mix with teeth impressively bared. I'd like to see an inferior Westie Yipper do that. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968050) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:31 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi westies are known for their gameness and thinking they are larger than they are.
i have personally seen him pwn a pit/lab mix, a boxer, a german shephard, and these annoying ass huskies at the dog beach. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:39 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house they might have the game, but they don't got the TEETH (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968135) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:24 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house word
Leadership is the true sign of prestige among dogs, not the ability to sniff out one's own house. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:23 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house The Beagle is a leader among dogs and hounds. His ability to do math is more than up to counting to 700, as well as complex algebraic equations involving food. The Westie, on the other hand, cannot count at all and is simply able to sniff out the house where he lives. The fact that you are impressed by such an ability only proves that you have spent too much time around the inferior of the doggie species. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968029) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:38 AM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi incorrect. note andrew wiles' wikipedia entry: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrew_Wiles "Sir Andrew John Wiles (born April 11, 1953) is a dirty theory thief who stole his proof of Fermat's Last Theorem from a West Highland White Terrier, a dog breed well-known for producing pioneers in higher mathematics and quantum physics. He is also a British-American research mathematician at Princeton University, specialising in number theory. He attended The Leys School, Cambridge and then earned his BA degree from Merton College, Oxford University in 1974 and Ph.D. from Clare College, Cambridge University in 1980. His graduate research was guided by John Coates beginning in the summer of 1975. Together they worked on the arithmetic of elliptic curves with complex multiplication by the methods of Iwasawa theory. He further worked with Barry Mazur on the main conjecture of Iwasawa theory over \mathbb Q, and soon afterwards generalised this result to totally real fields. His most famous mathematical result is that all rational semistable elliptic curves are modular which, in particular, implies Fermat's Last Theorem." |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:25 AM Author: obsidian irate house regret we adopted a beagle when i was about 7 or 8 and she ran away and was probably killed by the pack of wild dogs that roamed the forest that bordered our property. we later found her skull (with the nose and ears still intact) and her ribcage and spinal column. it was gnarly. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968045) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 2:01 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house First let me say that the Beaglette (not The Beaglette) is generally inferior to male Beagles and is, of course, esepcially inferior to The Beagle. However, even an inferior Beaglette, nevertheless being a member of the Superior Beagle species, could easily have faked her own death and gone to a family that is clearly of a higher caliber than some trashy losers who live next to packs of wild dogs. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968306) |
Date: April 20th, 2007 1:02 AM Author: Fear-inspiring Tanning Salon German Shepherd Dogs are better
http://img453.imageshack.us/img453/5081/13in3.jpg |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:06 AM Author: Vibrant jade piazza degenerate without a doubt your best post ever. indisputably accurate and true. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967929) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:09 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house THE Beagle has a flawless record of PWNING German Shepherds in the worst way. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967951) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:12 AM Author: Vibrant jade piazza degenerate show me a schutz hund beagle and i'll stipulate to the possibility of a tie in certain areas. but i don't think you can. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967962) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:17 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house I would like to refer you to reasons The Beagle is superior to all xo posters, #1, SUPRA. YW (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967994) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:16 AM Author: violent university messiness gsd's back legs are bent funny. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967988) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:08 AM Author: Vibrant jade piazza degenerate i thought for sure this was going to be a Darwin schtick. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967943) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:08 AM Author: Fear-inspiring Tanning Salon Mandy is the Beagle lover (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7967948) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:30 AM Author: Narrow-minded bistre voyeur gas station they smell bad. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968071) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:33 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house Fuck you, that's part of The Beagle's charm. It is his special magical (and very superior) Beagle oil. When The Beagle steps in Petroleum byproduct, which The Beagle for some odd reason enjoys doing, his Beagle feet are perfectly white ten minutes later. There are plenty of Penguins out there that do not have such an impressive track record. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968094) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:37 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house WGHBB (White Girls Humped By Beagles) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968116) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:47 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house Subject: A leader among dogs and hounds http://www.wigglebuttwags.com/day_74.html
Please note that this is a picture of The Actual Beagle. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:49 AM Author: violent university messiness nice looking boy are those those belgian dogs behind him? |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:51 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house The pic is from a boarding place The Beagle had to stay at for a little while, so I don't know who the other dogs are. The Beagle is about 8 years old in that picture. Aging gracefully despite being free fed is just one small part of why The Beagle is superior to all other dogs. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7968202) |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:57 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house http://www.wigglebuttwags.com/day_128.html
here is another picture of The Beagle in the lead. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 1:55 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house http://www.wigglebuttwags.com/day_109.html
Note The Beagle in the preftigious middle seat while the pit bull and the german shepherd are forced to share. |
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Date: April 20th, 2007 2:03 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house http://www.wigglebuttwags.com/day_148.html
I don't want to talk about it! |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 1:57 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house beagie (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7984843) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 2:00 AM Author: obsidian irate house regret yes, but how would it fare in a fight with a groundhog? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7984851) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 2:09 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house The Beagle, and his echoing howls as he sticks his nose into groundhog holes, are feared by groundhogs everywhere. However, The Beagle is as merciful as he is brave. When The Beagle cornered a groundhog (this happened exactly once) he howled viciously but chose not to actually maul and eat the groundhog. It may also have been that The Beagle had no clue what the hell to do with a cornered groundhog, but I'm pretty sure that wasn't it. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7984889) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 2:14 AM Author: carnelian adventurous parlor boistinker "It may also have been that The Beagle had no clue what the hell to do with a cornered groundhog"
This is exactly correct. And before you contradict me note that you weren't there and *I* was the one holding the beagle. |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 2:17 AM Author: Frisky chad step-uncle's house You do not understand him. That is why he bites you so often. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#7984934) |
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Date: April 23rd, 2007 2:13 AM Author: carnelian adventurous parlor boistinker Beagles really are terrible dogs. They smell even after baths, howl like crazy, and bite at random. No, its not "charming."
Pit bulls and rotts are vastly superior. |
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Date: April 25th, 2007 2:56 PM Author: Laughsome hell fanboi titcr, fish. in an awesome coincidence, charles darwin did his shit on the hms beagle but he "so loved his little West Highland white terrier ... that he often wrote of his dog adventures around the house." (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#8004559) |
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Date: April 25th, 2007 3:01 PM Author: violent university messiness all hounds bay -- it's what they do. terriers don't smell that great either. |
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Date: April 25th, 2007 3:05 PM Author: talking masturbator beagles are cute but apparently stubborn. id consider getting one but im not home enough to care for it. see below (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=617396&forum_id=2#8004624) |
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Date: April 25th, 2007 3:03 PM Author: talking masturbator Beagles are bad pets because they need a lot of attention to be happy. you have to get two of them so they can keep each other company when you are aware. I suspect you, mandy, have a beagle and that your beagle is very dissatisfied with life. |