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BAM! You are a rapist. How do you gear up to go a-rapin'?

I'd be very well-prepared. I'd start by wearing Dragon Skin...
Adventurous Range Fanboi
  05/21/07
Frog went a rapin' and he did ride, uh-huh Frog went a rapi...
razzle cuck
  05/21/07
Fascinating take on an old classic.
Adventurous Range Fanboi
  05/21/07
Also, I'd carry a cellphone jamming device with me to thwart...
Adventurous Range Fanboi
  05/21/07
Relaxing wise? See some good movies. Go to the park/beach. Y...
lascivious mental disorder rehab
  05/21/07
bear spray? how big a hoss you trying to rape?
grizzly trip den knife
  05/21/07
I think you'd just crush a bitch.
Stirring sick locale son of senegal
  05/21/07
this is awesome.
bossy duck-like pocket flask
  11/07/07
Feather boa for flare.
Talented Stead Azn
  11/07/07
"How would you dudes prepare to go a-rapin'?" S...
Talented Stead Azn
  02/03/08
This line had me lollerskating all over: "so that I ...
yapping cerebral meetinghouse
  11/12/08
Shave everything.
bespoke plum location main people
  05/21/07
chloroform and a taser
slap-happy swashbuckling senate
  05/21/07
Exactly, I don't know what kind of street-brawl raping Petro...
Stirring sick locale son of senegal
  05/21/07
Why not just buy her a drink?
Chocolate appetizing roast beef
  05/21/07
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jU5NkuCiOUA
Dull Sanctuary
  05/21/07
don't tase me bro
excitant idea he suggested
  09/20/07
Underrated gem.
aromatic nighttime tanning salon
  09/20/07
How are you going to get the condom on while holding her dow...
Exhilarant embarrassed to the bone really tough guy
  09/20/07
I prefer death. Can I choose to be killed instead? If th...
Chocolate appetizing roast beef
  09/20/07
We studied that in crim law. You can't consent to being mur...
spectacular sneaky criminal abode
  09/20/07
It doesn't matter if you prefer death, as I prefer rape.
flickering casino
  09/20/07
Good you filthy whore
flickering casino
  11/07/07
180 This made me laugh
pontificating racy theater haunted graveyard
  09/20/07
Crazy fuck
spectacular sneaky criminal abode
  09/20/07
ah just beautiful
abnormal hall ratface
  09/20/07
Bust into the room guns blazin i'd be rockin two cougar m...
abnormal hall ratface
  09/20/07
I grab a book of bedtime stories and a bottle of KY, then kn...
bateful confused stage stock car
  09/20/07
BAM!
spectacular sneaky criminal abode
  09/20/07
181
bateful confused stage stock car
  09/20/07
I'd bring a rape kit
brass stage
  09/20/07
What kind of car would you drive? An armored 1988 Astrovan?
unhinged electric heaven
  09/20/07
Why armored? Most people would probably applaud his actions...
flickering casino
  09/20/07
so why would he require the SWAT gear?
unhinged electric heaven
  09/20/07
To prevent her from gouging his eyes and whatnot, I assumed.
flickering casino
  09/20/07
Don't forget this, "Level III armor along the crotch, a...
pontificating racy theater haunted graveyard
  09/20/07
I thought it would have been funnier if he had said "co...
flickering casino
  09/20/07
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHWS0H2JqSU give it to abo...
galvanic mad cow disease coffee pot
  11/07/07
LULZ
bateful confused stage stock car
  11/15/07
Double LULZ
bateful confused stage stock car
  11/21/07
If American troops in Iraq wore the getup described above, f...
Adventurous Range Fanboi
  11/21/07
Why gear up? Most women want it.
flickering casino
  02/26/08
In the usual course of things, the man will resist entry. Hi...
apoplectic library kitty cat
  02/26/08
cock pushups?
excitant idea he suggested
  02/28/08
good bump
bossy duck-like pocket flask
  02/28/08
...
bossy duck-like pocket flask
  03/17/08
please post at www.iblamethepatriarchy.com
Slimy potus
  03/17/08
i've read this thread before, and i STILL spit out my drink ...
peach titillating step-uncle's house windowlicker
  03/17/08
Saw Iron Man recently and thought of this thread when he fir...
Bull headed comical station milk
  06/09/08
...
Doobsian dilemma
  09/30/08
...
excitant idea he suggested
  11/12/08


Poast new message in this thread





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:24 PM
Author: Adventurous Range Fanboi

I'd be very well-prepared. I'd start by wearing Dragon Skin SOV-3000 Level IV body armor, in case anyone shoots at me. I'd wear a modified balaclava over my face and hair, to prevent DNA evidence from escaping from my head, combined with a ballistic faceplace and eyeguard to defend from possible strikes or gunshots to my face.

I'd wear Level III armor along the crotch, along with a ballguard that protects from kicking or grabbing attempts. I'd wear armor on the shins and along my forearms - both of which are vulnerable bones. My feet would be protected by heavy steel-toed jackboots with armor swaddling around the ankles. My neck and armpits would be armored up.

I would of course wear ballistic gloves. Everything I wear would be sprayed with a flame-retardant solution, in case my victim tried to ignite me. My outerwear would be one of those anti-taser jackets, so that I could be continuously shocked by multiple tasers with no ill effects. I'd probably slap on a gas mask to ward off chemical spraying attempts.

My OFFENSIVE weaponry would consist of a canister of bear spray, a police nightstick, a .45 ACP semiautomatic with an extra clip as well as a .38 revolver in case the semiauto hopelessly jams. I'd also have a taser, a serrated dagger, and a flare for shock effect. I'd carry lube and condoms. Finally, I'd have a finger-sized lubed probe to tease out Rapex-style devices before plunging in there. Pubes would be waxed.

It would take several weeks of training in this whole getup - running, rolling, driving, etc. - to get comfortable with it.

But once I was comfortable with it, I'd be a RAPIN' MACHINE.

How would you dudes prepare to go a-rapin'?



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149320)





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:28 PM
Author: razzle cuck

Frog went a rapin' and he did ride, uh-huh

Frog went a rapin' and he did ride, uh-huh

Frog went a rapin' and he did ride

With a sword and a pistol by his side, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh

He rode right up to Miss Mousie's door, uh-huh

He rode right up to Miss Mousie's door, uh-huh

He rode right up to Miss Mousie's door

Gave three loud raps, and a very big roar, uh-huh uh-huh uh-huh

Said Miss Mouse, are you within, uh-huh

Said Miss Mouse, are you within, uh-huh

Said Miss Mouse, are you within

Miss Mousie said, I sit and spin, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Took Miss Mousie on his knee, uh-huh

Took Miss Mousie on his knee, uh-huh

Took Miss Mousie on his knee,

Said Miss Mousie, will you fuck me, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Without my Uncle Rat's consent, uh-huh

Without my Uncle Rat's consent, uh-huh

Without my Uncle Rat's consent,

I wouldn't fuck the President, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Uncle Rat laughed, and he shook his fat sides, uh-huh

Uncle Rat laughed, and he shook his fat sides, uh-huh

Uncle Rat laughed, and he shook his fat sides

To think his niece would be a defiled, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Uncle Rat went running downtown, uh-huh

Uncle Rat went running downtown, uh-huh

Uncle Rat went running downtown

To buy his niece a raping gown, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Where shall the raping supper be, uh-huh

Where shall the raping supper be, uh-huh

Where shall the raping supper be

Way down yonder in the hollow tree, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

What shall the raping supper be, uh-huh

What shall the raping supper be, uh-huh

What shall the raping supper be

Fried mosquito and a black-eyed pea, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

First to come in was a flyin' moth, uh-huh

First to come in was a flyin' moth, uh-huh

First to come in was a flyin' moth

She layed out the table cloth, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was a juney bug, uh-huh

Next to come in was a juney bug, uh-huh

Next to come in was a juney bug

She brought in the water jug, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was a bumbly bee, uh-huh

Next to come in was a bumbly bee, uh-huh

Next to come in was a bumbly bee

Sat mosquito on his knee, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was a broken back flea, uh-huh

Next to come in was a broken back flea, uh-huh

Next to come in was a broken back flea

Danced a jig with the bumbly bee, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was Mrs. Cow, uh-huh

Next to come in was Mrs. Cow, uh-huh

Next to come in was Mrs. Cow

She tried to dance but she didn't know how, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was a little black tick, uh-huh

Next to come in was a little black tick, uh-huh

Next to come in was a little black tick

She ate so much it made her sick, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was the big black snake, uh-huh

Next to come in was the big black snake, uh-huh

Next to come in was the big black snake

Ate up all of the wedding cake, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Next to come in was the old gray cat, uh-huh

Next to come in was the old gray cat, uh-huh

Next to come in was the old gray cat

Swallowed the mouse and ate up the rat, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Mr.Frog went a-hoppin up over the brooke, uh-huh

Mr.Frog went a-hoppin up over the brooke, uh-huh

Mr.Frog went a-hoppin up over the brooke

A lily white dove came and swallowed him up, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

Little piece of corn bread layin' on the shelf, uh-huh

Little piece of corn bread layin' on the shelf, uh-huh

Little piece of corn bread layin' on the shelf

If you want anymore you can sing it yourself, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149337)





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:36 PM
Author: Adventurous Range Fanboi

Fascinating take on an old classic.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149377)





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:28 PM
Author: Adventurous Range Fanboi

Also, I'd carry a cellphone jamming device with me to thwart calls made within a 30-yard radius.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149340)





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:28 PM
Author: lascivious mental disorder rehab

Relaxing wise? See some good movies. Go to the park/beach. You should probably do some exercise because 1L year can be physical as much as mental.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149343)





Date: May 21st, 2007 8:02 PM
Author: grizzly trip den knife

bear spray? how big a hoss you trying to rape?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149962)





Date: May 21st, 2007 9:38 PM
Author: Stirring sick locale son of senegal

I think you'd just crush a bitch.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8150385)





Date: November 7th, 2007 4:05 PM
Author: bossy duck-like pocket flask

this is awesome.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8865669)





Date: November 7th, 2007 4:13 PM
Author: Talented Stead Azn

Feather boa for flare.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8865713)





Date: February 3rd, 2008 6:18 PM
Author: Talented Stead Azn

"How would you dudes prepare to go a-rapin'?"

Shave my body hair and get drunk.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9264545)





Date: November 12th, 2008 1:39 PM
Author: yapping cerebral meetinghouse

This line had me lollerskating all over:

"so that I could be continuously shocked by multiple tasers with no ill effects."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#10354950)





Date: May 21st, 2007 5:34 PM
Author: bespoke plum location main people

Shave everything.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149369)





Date: May 21st, 2007 7:52 PM
Author: slap-happy swashbuckling senate

chloroform and a taser

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149921)





Date: May 21st, 2007 10:19 PM
Author: Stirring sick locale son of senegal

Exactly, I don't know what kind of street-brawl raping Petro is imagining. The primary objective should be restraint and conveyance to an appropriate location.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8150652)





Date: May 21st, 2007 8:11 PM
Author: Chocolate appetizing roast beef

Why not just buy her a drink?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8149987)





Date: May 21st, 2007 8:18 PM
Author: Dull Sanctuary

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jU5NkuCiOUA

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8150013)





Date: September 20th, 2007 10:50 AM
Author: excitant idea he suggested

don't tase me bro

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666439)





Date: September 20th, 2007 10:52 AM
Author: aromatic nighttime tanning salon

Underrated gem.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666444)





Date: September 20th, 2007 11:22 AM
Author: Exhilarant embarrassed to the bone really tough guy

How are you going to get the condom on while holding her down? You can't put it on beforehand because you have to be hard.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666541)





Date: September 20th, 2007 11:24 AM
Author: Chocolate appetizing roast beef

I prefer death. Can I choose to be killed instead?

If this shit ever happened to me, I would make sure I wasn't alive to see the next day.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666548)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:22 PM
Author: spectacular sneaky criminal abode

We studied that in crim law. You can't consent to being murdered.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666942)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:39 PM
Author: flickering casino

It doesn't matter if you prefer death, as I prefer rape.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667180)





Date: November 7th, 2007 3:58 PM
Author: flickering casino

Good you filthy whore

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8865637)





Date: September 20th, 2007 11:30 AM
Author: pontificating racy theater haunted graveyard

180

This made me laugh

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666557)





Date: September 20th, 2007 11:45 AM
Author: spectacular sneaky criminal abode

Crazy fuck

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666588)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:04 PM
Author: abnormal hall ratface

ah just beautiful

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666881)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:13 PM
Author: abnormal hall ratface

Bust into the room guns blazin

i'd be rockin two cougar magnums locked and loaded and of course a bandana over my face like a wild west cowboy

instead of worrying about the DNA backlash id just shoot her and dump her body in gary, indiana

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666915)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:17 PM
Author: bateful confused stage stock car

I grab a book of bedtime stories and a bottle of KY, then knock on my daughter's door.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666927)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:21 PM
Author: spectacular sneaky criminal abode

BAM!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666939)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:24 PM
Author: bateful confused stage stock car

181

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666949)





Date: September 20th, 2007 1:25 PM
Author: brass stage

I'd bring a rape kit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8666952)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:38 PM
Author: unhinged electric heaven

What kind of car would you drive? An armored 1988 Astrovan?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667173)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:41 PM
Author: flickering casino

Why armored? Most people would probably applaud his actions, not try to stop him.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667183)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:43 PM
Author: unhinged electric heaven

so why would he require the SWAT gear?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667185)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:44 PM
Author: flickering casino

To prevent her from gouging his eyes and whatnot, I assumed.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667189)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:46 PM
Author: pontificating racy theater haunted graveyard

Don't forget this, "Level III armor along the crotch, along with a ballguard that protects from kicking or grabbing attempts"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667194)





Date: September 20th, 2007 2:48 PM
Author: flickering casino

I thought it would have been funnier if he had said "codpiece" instead of "ballguard."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8667203)





Date: November 7th, 2007 4:01 PM
Author: galvanic mad cow disease coffee pot

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHWS0H2JqSU

give it to about 16 seconds in.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8865654)





Date: November 15th, 2007 3:15 PM
Author: bateful confused stage stock car

LULZ

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8898792)





Date: November 21st, 2007 10:36 AM
Author: bateful confused stage stock car

Double LULZ

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8921581)





Date: November 21st, 2007 10:41 AM
Author: Adventurous Range Fanboi

If American troops in Iraq wore the getup described above, fewer of them would be dead today. They'd be walking fortresses.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#8921585)





Date: February 26th, 2008 12:07 PM
Author: flickering casino

Why gear up? Most women want it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9390116)





Date: February 26th, 2008 12:07 PM
Author: apoplectic library kitty cat

In the usual course of things, the man will resist entry. His masculine pride on the line, he doesn't want to be placed in a feminine role. However, properly applied force will change his belief system. First, ensure that your cock is rock hard. Second, apply ample lube both on his ass crack and at least one inch inside his anal cavity. A rigid finger can easily overcome any resistance created by his clenching. Now comes the challenging part, when your cock, by the sheer strength of its hardness, has to overcome his strenuously rigid anal muscles. Have no doubt, he firmly believes that he will be able to resist you with this method. But he won't. Simply place your amply lubed black cock square on the entrance of his hole. This is no easy task as you need to verify the hole's location in situations where his ass crack is hairy. Once properly situated, punch him with all your force in the back of the head. Wait a few seconds for his stress/shock induced clenching to cease and start pushing. You should be able to pop the head in. At this point he will be screaming in pain, and you should remind him that continued resistance will only cause permanent injury to his anal cavity. Continuing to adequate lubricate your phallus, push in slowly on your way to lovemaking.

http://www.xoxohth.com/thread.php?thread_id=773817&mc=38&forum_id=2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9390119)





Date: February 28th, 2008 10:09 AM
Author: excitant idea he suggested

cock pushups?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9400287)





Date: February 28th, 2008 10:10 AM
Author: bossy duck-like pocket flask

good bump

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9400292)





Date: March 17th, 2008 11:27 PM
Author: bossy duck-like pocket flask



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9492142)





Date: March 17th, 2008 11:29 PM
Author: Slimy potus

please post at

www.iblamethepatriarchy.com



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9492160)





Date: March 17th, 2008 11:45 PM
Author: peach titillating step-uncle's house windowlicker

i've read this thread before, and i STILL spit out my drink laughing when i saw it again today. i think it's the "a'rapin" part, you can imagine petro whistling while he pulls on his black gloves and mask

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9492229)





Date: June 9th, 2008 6:45 PM
Author: Bull headed comical station milk

Saw Iron Man recently and thought of this thread when he first constructs the armor in the desert.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#9874101)





Date: September 30th, 2008 1:35 PM
Author: Doobsian dilemma



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#10214454)





Date: November 12th, 2008 1:23 PM
Author: excitant idea he suggested



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=634889&forum_id=2#10354924)