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a day in the life of a Snail: an original XO Choose Your Own Adventure Novel

You don't have any work today because you basically only wor...
Domesticated mad cow disease
  12/29/15
b!
Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven
  12/29/15
C
rose pocket flask institution
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
c
vivacious nursing home associate
  12/29/15
a
Sticky Theater
  12/29/15
a
Milky dog poop
  12/29/15
Next chapter please
Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven
  12/29/15
I can', A & B ar tied :(
Domesticated mad cow disease
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
Fine I change my vote to A.
Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven
  12/29/15
a provides nutrition and wont let you starve
galvanic corner hissy fit
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
?
galvanic corner hissy fit
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would fe...
Domesticated mad cow disease
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
c for sure
galvanic corner hissy fit
  12/29/15
C
Milky dog poop
  12/29/15
c
Sick native faggot firefighter
  12/29/15
Xo
rose pocket flask institution
  12/29/15
chaturbate
zombie-like electric furnace
  12/30/15
C!
Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven
  12/29/15
NEXT CHAPTER
Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven
  12/29/15
everyone in this thread unzips.
Shimmering Pit French Chef
  12/29/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/29/15
...
rose pocket flask institution
  12/29/15
Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?
Sick native faggot firefighter
  12/29/15
no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend
cerise glittery forum sandwich
  12/29/15
lol ouch
Talented Resort
  12/30/15
he is busy doing tinychat
galvanic corner hissy fit
  12/29/15
...
racy gay brethren
  12/30/15
...
copper headpube azn
  12/30/15
Topic has amazing potential.
Iridescent base
  12/30/15
You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some ...
Domesticated mad cow disease
  12/30/15
2
Talented Resort
  12/30/15
I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER s...
Iridescent base
  12/30/15
police
zombie-like electric furnace
  12/30/15
1
Milky dog poop
  12/30/15
lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth
rose pocket flask institution
  12/30/15
...
rose pocket flask institution
  01/02/16
4 and 180
Sick native faggot firefighter
  12/30/15
Wake up and post please.
Sick native faggot firefighter
  12/30/15
...
rose pocket flask institution
  12/30/15
18000000000000000000000000000000000
canary sex offender organic girlfriend
  01/11/16
...
beady-eyed cuck
  11/05/20
next chapter please!
Big clear shitlib
  11/05/20
...
bungulator
  12/13/25
...
unhinged degenerate
  11/05/20


Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:54 PM
Author: Domesticated mad cow disease

You don't have any work today because you basically only work two days out of seven at most. Instead, you are at the local grocery store, pondering how to use your EBT card.

Snow falls to the ground outside as you wish you could drink yourself silly, fall into a snow pile, and never wake up. The store has a pungent odor that one naturally associates with inner-city grocery stores.

Everything in the store reminds you that CAPITALISM is bullshit FRAUD AND LIES where proles fucking SCAVENGE to live when faggot parasite bankers and lawyers and eating out to celebrate RAPING this country and everyone in it. Kill all elites by tearing their limbs off with horses and their families too.

Anyways, you only have enough remaining on your EBT to purchase one of the three products on sale:

a) six cans of turkey chili

b) two liters of diet coke

c) a bunch of bananas

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480960)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven

b!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480979)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: rose pocket flask institution

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481594)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:55 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480970)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: vivacious nursing home associate

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480973)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:56 PM
Author: Sticky Theater

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480975)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 9:57 PM
Author: Milky dog poop

a

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29480989)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:11 PM
Author: Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven

Next chapter please

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481133)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:15 PM
Author: Domesticated mad cow disease

I can', A & B ar tied :(

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481164)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:20 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481212)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:21 PM
Author: Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven

Fine I change my vote to A.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481216)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:22 PM
Author: galvanic corner hissy fit

a

provides nutrition and wont let you starve

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481222)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:23 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481225)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: galvanic corner hissy fit

?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481285)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481289)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:30 PM
Author: Domesticated mad cow disease

You lug the turkey chili home as you wonder what it would feel like if you shoved it all up your ass. Your death would be a slightly less humiliating than your actual "life".

Once you get home, you throw it all and start smacking it open with your broken can opener. It's broken because you got it from the Dollar Tree a year ago and you use it all the fucking time because you're too fucking depressed to cook FUCK OBAMA'S AMERICA.

After microwaving it, you douse it in tabasco sauce that you STOLE from Chipotle because LLJL fuck those shitlib faggots, it's so 180 to go at peak hour and just fucking steal sauce. You hope you get arrested one day because at least jail provides life structure.

While eating, you have four tabs open on the computer. None of them are XO. Which do you go on while eating your SHITchili

a) facebook

b) ashemaletv

c) chaturbate

d) drudgereport

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481288)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481296)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:32 PM
Author: galvanic corner hissy fit

c for sure

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481299)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:33 PM
Author: Milky dog poop

C

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481311)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:56 PM
Author: Sick native faggot firefighter

c

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481436)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:16 PM
Author: rose pocket flask institution

Xo

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481600)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:58 AM
Author: zombie-like electric furnace

chaturbate

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482189)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:31 PM
Author: Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven

C!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481291)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 10:51 PM
Author: Carnelian Mind-boggling Heaven

NEXT CHAPTER

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481403)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:00 PM
Author: Shimmering Pit French Chef

everyone in this thread unzips.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481469)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:15 PM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481596)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:14 PM
Author: rose pocket flask institution



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481589)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:33 PM
Author: Sick native faggot firefighter

Did they turn off Snailmo's electricity?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481713)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:39 PM
Author: cerise glittery forum sandwich

no, i think he found a job, and a girlfriend

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481748)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:41 AM
Author: Talented Resort

lol ouch

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482097)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 29th, 2015 11:47 PM
Author: galvanic corner hissy fit

he is busy doing tinychat

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29481804)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:38 AM
Author: racy gay brethren



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482070)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:39 AM
Author: copper headpube azn



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482079)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 12:40 AM
Author: Iridescent base

Topic has amazing potential.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482091)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:01 AM
Author: Domesticated mad cow disease

You log into chaturbate in order to watch a session of some dude that you've been following since you found his pictures on a /pol/ thread describing how DEGENERATE transexuals are. JFC shitlibs are really disgusting just trying to shove all of this trans shit down our throat. fuck Obama, we should drag out all media FAGGOTS from their home like that 180000 scene in the Dark Knight Arises where Bane39 takes over Gotham.

You shovel turkey chili in your mouth and you can't help stop thinking about Benzo's asshole and retching, so you put it away for a bit.

Instead, you decide to FURIOUSLY stroke your SPERMWYRM to the long-haired crossdresser on the stream as he seductively WIGGLES his puckered BUTTHOLE.

It is enjoyable and you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, until something horrifying pops out of his shirt. He has BREASTS now. Your wyrm reddens and shrinkens as you realize that he is now identifying as a "she" and has become taking hormones. In disgust, you throw off your Beats!(tm) headphones (they were a gift) and close the window. You zip up your pants angrily as yet another fine day RUINED by libs.

You decide to research more possible career paths that you will never accomplish while you finish your chili. What do you research?

1) Military

2) Police

3) Education

4) Computer Science

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482203)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Talented Resort

2

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482210)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:03 AM
Author: Iridescent base

I choose 2, sounds like a great opportunity to bash BOOMER scum.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482211)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:08 AM
Author: zombie-like electric furnace

police

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482227)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:09 AM
Author: Milky dog poop

1

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482232)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 1:49 AM
Author: rose pocket flask institution

lol r u like a genderfuluid snail or sth

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482337)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 2nd, 2016 2:50 PM
Author: rose pocket flask institution



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29505583)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 2:02 AM
Author: Sick native faggot firefighter

4 and 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29482377)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:26 AM
Author: Sick native faggot firefighter

Wake up and post please.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29483717)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 30th, 2015 11:10 PM
Author: rose pocket flask institution



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29488970)



Reply Favorite

Date: January 11th, 2016 10:55 AM
Author: canary sex offender organic girlfriend

18000000000000000000000000000000000

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#29570485)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:16 AM
Author: beady-eyed cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#41284039)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:22 AM
Author: Big clear shitlib

next chapter please!

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#41284068)



Reply Favorite

Date: December 13th, 2025 2:14 AM
Author: bungulator



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#49506318)



Reply Favorite

Date: November 5th, 2020 8:34 AM
Author: unhinged degenerate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3082672&forum_id=2Elisa#41284137)