I told my wife that we are backsliding in our financial position and that the stress was killing me. I told her that we needed to implement some serious austerity measures to get back on track. I told her that she could spend some money each month, but that she needed to rein it in.

Well the results from day 1 (1 May 2025) are in:

She spent $106.24 in 4 transactions. $38.70 (36.43%) was on crap for our son (uniform for swim team) and a snack. $67.54 (63.57%) at the premium grocer with the premium prices buying God knows what.

Daily spending of $106.24 per day would only be discretionary spend of $3,293.44 for the month of May, which is admittedly quite alright and not a big deal, but it also means that I cannot afford to buy anything myself, which is only fair; it's not like I bring home 90% of the bacon or anything.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898448)

So yeah, situation is actually 20% WORSE than I initially thought.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898531)

But yeah. Your wife sounds like a disaster financially. You should take all cards away and put her on the cash envelope system. Be aware she may try to mischaracterize this as abuse, but fuck her and her spending

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898954)

When are you going to have a kid already? I’ve been a dad for more than a decade.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48900465)

- this is not my problem and you made a grave category error when you presumed to treat me like some "partner" who should shoulder responsiblity. I will now spend MOAR until or unless you institute the appropriate hierarchy, which I dont only need but crave

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898500)

Current Weight: 356

Target Weight: 178

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898737)

I just want to explode and say stop buying stupid shit but I’m a huge pussy so I don’t

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898785)

Wife does her own searching and finds $200 push cart with a few more features, but most importantly, is in the team colors, shows it to kid, and of course now we have to get that one.

It’s just shit like this all the time.

OK, wife ranting over! Full disclaimer despite that their spendthrift ways women are 180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898812)

This is not sustainable. Life is sprinting on a treadmill with an evil demon constantly increasing the speed and a wall of razor sharp spears just behind you.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898833)

1 package of 8 thumanns hot dogs

hamburger buns

hot dog buns

Package of american cheese slices

bottle of ketchup

bottle of mustard

large jug of fruit punch

2 bags of prepackaged caesar salad mix

king size reese's peanut butter cups as a snack for the ride home

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898921)

Is it really that retarded to make a hamburger dinner for a family? Or is it just that I went to the premium grocer to buy the ingredients?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48899013)

you want good burgers? get some chuck shoulder & grind it yourself. it'll be amazing.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48900469)

STORE - $1.89

Category - Food & Drink

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48898999)

This has been an ongoing thing with her. In the past she has taken the view that all drainage is my problem because her house is graded ever so slightly higher. She’s also lied to me about the drains that run from where her roof water collects to our common boundary. She actually took the position that there were none and I had no idea until I saw her actually messing with one during a thunderstorm. Last year I paid over $4000 to have a new drain dug. It was over 100 feet long and like 4 feet deep at the end. We just had our fence replaced too, and went half and half on that, but what do you know she places a drain line on her drain and directed it back toward the rear of the property where the problem is, instead of toward the drains and the street. I don’t know why she thinks burying a drain line in the ground directing storm water from her roof onto my property is a good idea, but she did it without asking and so I was digging around to figure out what to do with it.

I saw her come home and then called her over to talk about and she flips out on me about digging in her yard.

People are so fucking weird. She appears to seem adamant about exacerbating the drainage issue between our two houses and she seems livid if she perceives that I’m on her side of the line poking around, when she hires people to basically create problems. I’m sure it’s because she paid money for landscapers who fucked things up that makes her so angry, but I feel incredibly slighted because she has no appreciation for how much damage unpremeditated drain problems can be.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48900143)

Opinion | Guest Essay

By Evan39, Former Night Manager, $afeway LLP

May 3, 2025

My Wife Spent $106.24 After We Agreed to Cut Back. I Now Sleep in the Crawlspace.

They say financial ruin begins with indulgence. A dinner out. A forgotten subscription. A $23.34 Jimmy John’s order, eaten in silence in the garage while your husband resets the fuse box and mutters about hummu$.

For me, it began on May 1st.

We had agreed: this was a Club Card Threshold Month™.

The gas points mattered. The budget was real.

She even initialed the laminated spending forecast I taped to the fridge.

Then came the CVS receipt.

$106.24.

Followed by: “It was just a few things.”

I asked to see the things.

She said they were “gone.”

My nights are filled with cost calculations and freezer inventory.

Hers are filled with “sleep gummies,” which cost $17.99 and have a smiling moon on the label.

We cannot afford the moon.

We are down to canned beans, bulk oatmeal, and expired Capri Suns I found behind the dryer.

She tells me to “live a little.”

I live entirely inside the Safeway app.

My joy comes in 2-for-1 deals and the faint dopamine rush of a receipt that ends in ".00".

She no longer opens my Google Sheets.

She calls them “doom documents.”

She says I’ve turned budgeting into a religion.

Maybe I have.

But when the Mahchine™ bills you twice for a bag of lentils and then whispers, “$hredding won’t save you ;)”, you start to understand that this is no longer about lentils.

I’ve tried everything.

PowerPoint presentations.

Mock trials.

A slideshow of “Historic Marriages Ruined by Snack Purchases.”

Nothing worked.

Yesterday she bought artisanal crackers.

They were called “Seed Companions™.”

I haven’t eaten in three days.

We are not poor.

We are beleaguered by choice.

And the woman I love is out there, somewhere, spending $12.99 on lavender oat milk creamer while I boil hot dog water for tea.

She is radiant.

She is defiant.

She is destroying us.

About the Author

Evan39 is the author of Everything Is Fine: A Memoir of Receipts and The Club Card Diaries: Love and Loss in Aisle 7. He lives, for now, in the crawlspace.

Read more at www.nytimes.com/evan39-snackdivorce

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48900961)

You have a mouth, don't you?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5719530&forum_id=2Elisa#48901848)