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cohabitation before marriage might have been a terrible idea
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Date: March 9th, 2018 12:24 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i want to marry my girlfriend, but i'm going to have to leave for a while for economic reasons. there is no material reason she should come with me. i fucked up. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35567052) |
Date: March 9th, 2018 12:25 AM Author: Dashing Territorial National Security Agency who knew lol (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35567061) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 12:26 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i was an atheist for years and years, it made me done goofed. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35567068) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:46 PM Author: sick rigpig home (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596212) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:13 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot Why don't you marry her? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35567323) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:09 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich I want to get married, I'm even friends with a seminary rector who jokes about how easy it would be to just get married in back. it's literally just social forces that stop us, like Becky is getting married this year and I don't want to compete with her napkin choice. fucking gc (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568118) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:24 AM Author: vibrant gay station Just marry her. A summer can contain more than one wedding for a friends group. Just put it in a different month. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568197) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:30 AM Author: Confused Library Your woman sounds like fine marriage material. Lmao (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568232) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:31 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568237) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:40 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich eef (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568273) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:42 AM Author: Dashing Territorial National Security Agency (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568282) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:31 PM Author: talented tank preventive strike (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570080) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:12 PM Author: Passionate dragon (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572153) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:13 PM Author: canary blathering house (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572163) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:47 PM Author: Maize Fragrant Azn (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596221) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:55 PM Author: Crusty useless brakes (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596295) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:24 AM Author: vivacious bat shit crazy lay background story Holy fucking shit lol at marrying a woman like that (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568562) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:40 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot Lmao those are terrible reasons to not get married. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568668) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:43 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich agreed (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568692) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:50 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot So get married. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568767) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:13 PM Author: Glittery Stage you can get married now and have a party at some later more convenient date (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572171) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:24 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy sex before marriage also terrible idea (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568202) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:32 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit Are you kidding? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568244) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:48 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy only kind of (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568313) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 10:00 AM Author: pearly deep partner You’re such a stupid cunt (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35602349) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:08 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i'll admit i don't know where to draw the line between a couple of relationships and tinder cock carousel, but i don't think there's any putting the genie back in the bottle wrt this (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568446) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:41 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy oh, definitely, im speaking theoretically (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568679) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:45 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot There is no line. There has just been a great catastrophe and we live in the aftermath. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568715) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:50 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568772) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 11:44 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich sadly tcr (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35569280) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:31 PM Author: talented tank preventive strike (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570082) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:14 PM Author: Electric meetinghouse (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572176) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:35 AM Author: puce son of senegal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593161) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:40 AM Author: exciting plaza (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593192) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:57 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593224) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 3:19 AM Author: Soul-stirring casino (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593255) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 10:00 AM Author: pearly deep partner (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35602352) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:33 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit This thread is full of fail. If you want to get married then get married. If you want her to come with you and she can, then why can't she come with you? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568246) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:48 AM Author: Light Friendly Grandma Trailer Park (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568320) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:09 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i haven't brought up the question but don't think she wants to get married right now from what probing i've done. can't come because she won't have a job and she's a gc worker unit. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568459) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 11:42 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit So have a conversation with her on all this. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35569258) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:46 PM Author: bespoke parlor boltzmann Ntcr. You decide when to get married, not her. You should never discuss marriage before proposing. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570203) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:13 PM Author: Passionate dragon (single guy) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572168) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:45 PM Author: bespoke parlor boltzmann You pussy. Just buy a ring and propose. She’ll say yes unless she wants to pack her shit and leave your place. It’s not up to her when you propose. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570196) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 10:01 AM Author: pearly deep partner You’re the lowest iq dimwit here (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35602354) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:33 AM Author: Charcoal bonkers half-breed heaven People who cohabitate before marriage have higher divorce rates, hth. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568247) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:34 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit JFC, do they not teach that correlation does not equal causation anymore? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568250) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:35 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party the causation can be logically argued, but it's hard to prove. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568255) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:43 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit No shit, but the mere fact that they're correlated doesn't mean shit. In this case it probably has more to do with the fact that the only people who don't cohabit before marriage are religious nutjobs, who are less likely to get divorced. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568285) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:47 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party and it probably also has something to do with the fact that premarital cohabitation causes people to be shittier spouses, to value marriage less seriously, etc. again, it's hard to prove this. i'm not saying it's a complete causation by any means. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568308) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:51 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit I seriously doubt this. Whether someone is a good or shitty spouse has more to do on life outlook, compatibility, etc. Compatibility, incidentally, is really hard to gauge on a day to day level before living together.
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:57 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party compatibility is about character and values and compromise, not whether one person is a neat freak and other is a slob. basic day to day shit is superficial and can be worked out if two people have the right values and character. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568385) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:07 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit "compatibility is about character and values and compromise, not whether one person is a neat freak and other is a slob"
It is both.
"basic day to day shit is superficial and can be worked out if two people have the right values and character"
Yeah, if two people like to live in totally different ways they're in for a rough time. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:13 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party how many divorces happen because of day-to-day incompatibility like one person is clean and the other is messy? is that even in incompatibility -- two neat freaks can drive each other crazy, and two slobs can drive each other crazy as well. all this stuff can be deal with. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568483) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:19 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit Can it? Yes. But it makes life harder and living with someone for decades will have challenges even in the best of cases.
Also, the number one cause of divorce is finances. This is an opportunity to see how they handle spending on a day to day basis. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:22 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party you missed the point. there's potential for conflict in any permutation of clean/neat. two clean freaks can drive each other crazy just as much as one clean freak and one slob can drive each other crazy. there's no best of cases and worst of cases. this is all superficial shit.
of course divorce/sex are the top causes of divorce. you could easily observe how shitty someone is with their money without living with them. i could tell you whether every friend/acquaintance i know is good or bad with money just by seeing the lifestyle they lead. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 11:43 AM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit LOL, you're a perfect example of why people should live together first. You have no idea what you're talking about. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35569267) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:51 AM Author: crystalline cowardly church building I think it's more that once you start combining possessions, it's much harder to separate. People just move on to the next step (marriage) instead of breaking up. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568345) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:50 PM Author: Maize Fragrant Azn yes.
i broke up with a LTR after we had lived together for a couple years, had the same circle of friends, shared most things, etc and it was fucking DREADFUL. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:54 AM Author: Vigorous spot Lol come on (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568359) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:54 AM Author: Vigorous spot This was always my take on that stat too (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568369) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:23 AM Author: painfully honest adventurous juggernaut (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568555) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:41 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich seems right but link for scholarly purposes? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568278) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 9:50 AM Author: Charcoal bonkers half-breed heaven https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-the-name-love/201303/does-cohabitation-lead-more-divorces
My wife and I cohabitated for a few years and have been married for 11, btw. We were aware going in to our marriage that cohabitation prior was connected with higher divorce rates. We also did premarital counseling through our church and they urged us to make specific life changes so that our life together felt "new" after the marriage and that helped considerably. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:00 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party fuck jesus, but this is CR. our ortho jew marital advisors (rabbis, rebbetzins, elders who gave us husband/wife classes) did the same for us. the big one, of course, is observing the laws of jewish marital purity. we also got new sheets (returned the old ones, of course), got new sofas, kashered the kitchen and replaced all the cookware with the kashering (returned them of course) right after the wedding, etc. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568408) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:06 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich interesting, ty bro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568433) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:41 PM Author: brindle boyish set fortuitous meteor what kind of changes did you make iyo (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570163) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 3:57 PM Author: Charcoal bonkers half-breed heaven The biggest was moving. We were ready to buy a house and so waited to do it until right after we were married, and we chose to go to a new community. Nesting into the house and making new friends in our neighborhood helped.
It was also far enough away that we needed to find a new church.
We also started a "date night" since we'd already fallen into an old married couple routine. We've let it go since then, but that lasted for a while and was helpful.
We made a few commitments toward basic relationship maintenance - communication type things - that we started right after we got married, too, and that we hadn't been doing when we were just living together. |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:21 AM Author: maroon school wrinkle Men who are still marrying in 2018 are betas who have concluded they can't do any better and are okay with putting everything they've worked for on the line against an extremely biased family court system.
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:28 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich or trying to be virtuous and live well, bro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568584) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 11:01 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568850) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:49 AM Author: exciting plaza (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593216) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:28 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568585) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:28 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party (beta virgin) (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568587) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:41 AM Author: maroon school wrinkle I have nothing against getting laid. However, I'm very against allowing the government to determine what happens if your relationship fails. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568681) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:48 AM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party this is virginspeak (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568751) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:54 AM Author: maroon school wrinkle I lost my virginity in the 90s. You're probably just mad because you're already married and now realize you have no way out without losing everything. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35568802) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:43 PM Author: misunderstood center oh so you're sad, lonely, AND old. thanks for clarifying. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570184) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 2:08 PM Author: Swollen Stage Reading Party (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570410) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:37 AM Author: puce son of senegal (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593175) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 1:23 PM Author: 180 Grizzly Locale Hissy Fit (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35570027) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:36 AM Author: puce son of senegal Jesus christ take a break from redpill thought for once (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593170) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:42 AM Author: Cordovan corner puppy cr, sad to see people too far down the redpill wormhole. broken souls, probably irretrievable. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593198) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:53 PM Author: Crusty useless brakes Is he wrong about family court tho? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596273) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 10:47 AM Author: Beta piazza double fault "but i'm going to have to leave for a while for economic reasons"
explain |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 3:59 PM Author: greedy rough-skinned property sneaky criminal titcexplain (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35571279) |
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Date: March 9th, 2018 6:12 PM Author: Passionate dragon Let me get this straight, you want to marry your live in girlfriend. You have to go to a different city for work. Instead of telling her all of this, you're just going to break up? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35572161) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:33 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i didn't have a ring or anything, but brought up marriage a few days ago. she was taken aback and could not handle talking about the concept. i'm fucked, bros. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593153) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:34 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593157) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:36 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i love her but she just doesn't want to get married at 25. she is entering the church soon though so maybe there will be a miracle conversion but idk man (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593166) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:36 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593172) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:37 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich 3 years and lol no, but i was also a degenerate. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593178) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:39 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593182) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:40 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich of course it is. anti-social hedonism is awful, whether from men or women. arguably, men should know better. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593193) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 3:25 AM Author: canary blathering house (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35593259) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:21 PM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35595949) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:52 PM Author: Crusty useless brakes (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596256) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:57 PM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596314) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:45 PM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot Damn, that sucks.
Sorry to pry a bit, but rather than simply advise ATD I guess I'd have a few questions:
-Is she entering the church for serious reasons or mostly to make you happy? Are you still cohabiting (and presumably boning) at this moment? Do you consider this inadvisable at all if so?
-Why the heck is she so opposed to getting married at 25? That's a perfectly normal age to get married at. No significant life changes are coming past that point save your steady decline to inevitable death.
-Does she know about your impending departure to foreign land? How does she feel about it? Was she just down for some non-marital LDR of indeterminate length? |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:52 PM Author: Maize Fragrant Azn i'm also curious about #2. you guys have been dating for 3 years and 25 is a normal age for a girl to get married. if she wants to marry you, what's the difference whether she marries you at 26 (assuming a 1 yr engagement) or like 28? what does that change? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35596258) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:18 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich odds i got irl catfished? (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601293) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:19 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601296) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:23 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich i love her though and really don't want to seek another relationship at this point. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601304) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:24 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601309) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 9:53 AM Author: Maize Fragrant Azn idk. i just find it completely bizarre when she says she wants to wait. wait for what?
it'd be different if she had a reason. like maybe she might get a promotion that would require her to expat for a year and she wants to get married when she's back in the US. or if you had been dating for only 3 months and she wanted more time to get to know you better, that would be totally reasonable.
but 3 years dating and you're moving in together? i mean shit, if you don't know by now whether you want to marry the person then you might as well break up. |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 12:38 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich my answers might not be very interesting but here we go: - she has serious reasons of her own, and her social life has weirdly swayed into an awkward position between degenerate liberals and tradcons. cohabitating was a mistake, but, perhaps luckily, we won't be soon. on sex i have a perhaps post-hoc or disingenuous position, but seriously think that the telos should not just be childbearing, but also serious, hopefully permanent unification of two people. obviously it should be done in marriage so that it will be permanent, and i regret my decisions. - i have no idea. one of her friends is getting married at 29 (the becky mentioned above), so maybe that's making her think it isn't time yet; or, since she is from proletown USA, perhaps she associates getting married young with that; or perhaps she did not plan for the relationship to be marriage-track, as you suggest. - she knows, and she encouraged me to do it when i initially said "fuck no". maybe she didn't think she was signing up for this, so to speak, and she expected to be in more relationships before she tied herself down. in that case, i wonder if she would have cut out much earlier if we weren't cohabitating. on the other hand, giving her the benefit of the doubt, me leaving is hitting her kinda hard too. maybe she just was not prepared to think about marriage. |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:28 AM Author: Walnut Old Irish Cottage she sounds genuine but perhaps not mentally prepared to give up fucking other people on the side, which she's probably been doing
not trying to be too flippant here. just can't think of many other reasons given your description of her and the situation. you're her "relationship" but she thinks she's too young to give up the rest of her sex life. |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:28 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601318) |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:43 AM Author: Walnut Old Irish Cottage it's really my best guess
if she didn't like op she wouldn't have spent 3 years with him or cohabitated with him, and she wouldn't have gotten "taken aback/anxious" at the idea of marriage. she would have said "lol fuck no" and gone on her way.
she got anxious because she actually does think she might want to marry him, but she isn't ready for it, and is afraid that if she just says "no" then it's all over and back to square one for her as far as finding a potential mate goes. but she also doesn't want to say "yes" because she doesn't want to give up her youth yet.
optimal path for a chick is to maximize time fucking strange while still young, and lock someone down just before looks start to go downhill. risk is that she hasn't locked someone down before it starts to go downhill. so the game to play is to foster relationships with potential husbands while still pulling tricks on the side. then she can maximize fucking around time without the risk of not having a potential long-term mate when looks start to go south. but op has forced her hand and now she can't have both MY relationship and MY chads.
i.e. she wants to have her cake and eat it too. |
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Date: March 14th, 2018 1:50 AM Author: provocative area spin, ratfucks (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35601378) |
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Date: March 13th, 2018 2:24 PM Author: maroon school wrinkle Don't get married, bro. It'll likely be the biggest mistake you'll ever make. All relationships fizzle out at some point...whether it's 3 years from now, 10 years from now, 20 years from now or 40 years from now.
It'll happen. |
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Date: March 21st, 2018 1:03 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich gf did her first confession today. she seemed shaken but i was too when i came back to the church. priest told her she had to stop cohabitating, so maybe there's some providential force in me moving far away. (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35650575) |
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Date: March 26th, 2018 12:33 AM Author: low-t glassy round eye coffee pot (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35688930) |
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Date: March 26th, 2018 12:47 AM Author: Big-titted point sandwich ty bro (http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=3913822&forum_id=2#35689021) |