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Good writers: Fix this clunky sentence I can't seem to fix

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
buff mexican
  04/30/21
"C was seen driving in the X area, with D as a passenge...
Pale adventurous messiness
  04/30/21
they do if its an auto case. Contrib or comparative play a ...
lavender people who are hurt
  04/30/21
Your sentence doesn't even say that A and B saw C and D, jus...
Floppy Bawdyhouse
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
dun tank
  05/02/21
Quick fixxx
odious resort weed whacker
  02/25/22
“As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a ...
Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate
  04/30/21
...
aphrodisiac effete rehab prole
  04/30/21
i thought about breaking it up -- it worse because it puts e...
buff mexican
  04/30/21
Ah m, okay. For some reason I assumed that D was the main pe...
Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate
  04/30/21
C and D are both involved. I continue to use the term "...
buff mexican
  04/30/21
"at this time" ROFL
Pale adventurous messiness
  04/30/21
Need to clarify at some point whether A or B were actually d...
lavender people who are hurt
  04/30/21
Yeah I just worked with the isolated sentence in question b/...
Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate
  04/30/21
You can do it in another sentence, but it's going to be impo...
lavender people who are hurt
  04/30/21
While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car that C w...
bronze electric furnace
  04/30/21
...
aromatic burgundy brunch
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving separately in the X area, they passe...
disrespectful incel
  04/30/21
This suggestion isn't meant to be used word for word, just g...
opaque new version jewess
  04/30/21
...
buff mexican
  04/30/21
...
carmine self-centered nursing home
  04/30/21
...
salmon motley library ratface
  04/30/21
...
marvelous water buffalo
  04/30/21
Very clear, no ambiguity, reads like 1st order logic, I like...
beady-eyed alcoholic organic girlfriend
  05/04/22
As A and B entered the X area, they looked at each other, an...
snowy national macaca
  04/30/21
...
hairraiser parlour useless brakes
  04/30/21
...
Dashing faggotry
  04/30/21
FRIENDLESS FAGGOT BIRDSHIT A was driving some FAGgOt BIRdshi...
Razzle-dazzle Coral Pervert
  04/30/21
...
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  04/30/21
...
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  04/30/21
...
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...
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...
Exciting Location Fat Ankles
  05/01/21
As A and B were sucking each other’s cocks in the XXX ...
Exciting Location Fat Ankles
  04/30/21
i think you nailed it.
aphrodisiac effete rehab prole
  04/30/21
...
brilliant death wish university
  04/30/21
i hope everyone appreciates the mental illness being perform...
aphrodisiac effete rehab prole
  04/30/21
...
Rambunctious market
  04/30/21
A and B passed D and C, who was driving.
bull headed church digit ratio
  04/30/21
...
Stirring area
  04/30/21
sounds like a riddle
Pale adventurous messiness
  04/30/21
i hate this crap As A and B were driving in the X area, t...
heady unhinged locale legend
  04/30/21
i wish this works and it sounds nice but it seems slightly o...
buff mexican
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D (who...
heady unhinged locale legend
  04/30/21
doesn't it need "D's car"
buff mexican
  04/30/21
it says he was driving, which means an automobile. if y...
heady unhinged locale legend
  04/30/21
Why do you need B, assuming A was driving. Don't say B was ...
lavender people who are hurt
  04/30/21
you have to make it more exciting. keep the reader interest...
supple milky home candlestick maker
  04/30/21
Were A and B both at the wheel?
Saffron base
  04/30/21
turns out it was a tandem bicycle.
aphrodisiac effete rehab prole
  04/30/21
...
Stirring area
  04/30/21
As some faggot and his friend were driving in the restricted...
unholy deranged mother hunting ground
  04/30/21
The two cars passed in X. In one, A was driving B. In the ot...
Soggy Shrine Internal Respiration
  04/30/21
star crossed lovers. reads like brokeback mountain
bull headed church digit ratio
  04/30/21
still the best way to do it. He has more than a handful of i...
Soggy Shrine Internal Respiration
  04/30/21
...
Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate
  04/30/21
Okay? Wow. Hey. Picture this: Cars A and B. Right? Going thr...
Dashing faggotry
  04/30/21
...
hairraiser parlour useless brakes
  04/30/21
A and B, as was their custom from time to time, were engaged...
mentally impaired center
  04/30/21
...
white mewling hall
  02/22/22
So, we need to talk about A driving around with B. Here's th...
histrionic wild theater
  04/30/21
400 km/h, 450 km/h, 500 km/h, 550 km/h; A could feel the for...
vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo
  04/30/21
Wow
histrionic wild theater
  04/30/21
I just copied this from a brief.
vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo
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...
fear-inspiring indian lodge
  04/30/21
Your stuff is the only stuff from here I share w my wife. E...
lavender people who are hurt
  04/30/21
...
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...
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aromatic burgundy brunch
  04/30/21
titcr.
Stirring area
  04/30/21
180
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...
carmine self-centered nursing home
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...
brilliant death wish university
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holy shit
amber hyperventilating toaster site
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attn low attention span poasters read this whole thing pls
carmine self-centered nursing home
  04/30/21
how
bull headed church digit ratio
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...
chestnut blood rage
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...
opaque new version jewess
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Talented Transparent Kitchen
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Talented Transparent Kitchen
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Talented Transparent Kitchen
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...
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wow
French Marketing Idea Hell
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Metal swashbuckling gay wizard
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High | level | legal work
Glittery stag film
  04/30/21
...
Rambunctious market
  04/30/21
Each of A and B were driving in AREA. They both passed a car...
Henna titillating school
  04/30/21
A and B passed a car driven by C, who was transporting D as ...
Khaki Really Tough Guy Set
  04/30/21
two people, a & b, drove past c driving with d in his ca...
Azure famous landscape painting
  04/30/21
C and his passenger D were traveling in X area. A overtook a...
Racy orchestra pit
  04/30/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
Adulterous Tanning Salon
  04/30/21
Haven’t read any of the replies, so someone else may h...
laughsome orchid business firm
  04/30/21
This was basically gromjoh's poast above except his was more...
brilliant death wish university
  04/30/21
...
amber hyperventilating toaster site
  04/30/21
...
opaque new version jewess
  04/30/21
...
vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo
  04/30/21
...
amber hyperventilating toaster site
  02/22/22
writing MFE's, any resources on improving clunky writing? I ...
Mustard halford
  04/30/21
Did you try the hydro hack?
opaque new version jewess
  04/30/21
What’s that
sooty razzle skinny woman stead
  04/30/21
You should drink more water, you're probably dehydrated. Th...
opaque new version jewess
  04/30/21
...
carmine self-centered nursing home
  04/30/21
Just write in the active voice with short simple sentences, ...
Big Walnut Gas Station
  04/30/21
A and B saw C driving in X
Big Walnut Gas Station
  04/30/21
andy and brad were driving around brooklyn when they passed ...
translucent coldplay fan
  04/30/21
I am gay
Jet internet-worthy range
  04/30/21
great thread
brilliant death wish university
  04/30/21
Shitty writing is putting too much into one sentence. A and...
Dark Piazza
  04/30/21
A and C, drivers, were in different cars, driving through ar...
supple milky home candlestick maker
  04/30/21
...
supple milky home candlestick maker
  05/02/21
...
supple milky home candlestick maker
  05/23/21
Where are we on this? Thank
opaque new version jewess
  05/02/21
As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car dri...
white mewling hall
  02/22/22
OP, does this help?
Pale adventurous messiness
  02/25/22
i don't think anyone reads shitlaw shitpaper so it doesn't m...
Drunken spruce indirect expression cumskin
  06/22/22
...
Pet Relief Area
  04/19/26
"and containing D as" -> "in which D was&q...
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  04/19/26
Lots of helpful suggestions in this thread but I’m not...
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...
Pet Relief Area
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Poast new message in this thread



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:48 AM
Author: buff mexican

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C and containing D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376133)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:57 AM
Author: Pale adventurous messiness

"C was seen driving in the X area, with D as a passenger, by both A and B."

(no one gives a fuck whether A and B were driving or doing a standing 69 at the time they saw these faggots)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376836)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 12:01 PM
Author: lavender people who are hurt

they do if its an auto case. Contrib or comparative play a role potentially. Better to keep it clean.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376873)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 2:10 PM
Author: Floppy Bawdyhouse

Your sentence doesn't even say that A and B saw C and D, just that they passed them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377665)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:40 PM
Author: dun tank

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42386999)



Reply Favorite

Date: February 25th, 2022 1:42 PM
Author: odious resort weed whacker
Subject: Quick fixxx

As A and B were driving in X, they passed a car driven by C containing D as a passenger.

EDIT: LMAO at the date

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032731)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:52 AM
Author: Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate

“As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C. D was a passenger in C’s car at the time.”

Would break up the sentences. Your original sentence isn’t terrible though.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376145)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:53 AM
Author: aphrodisiac effete rehab prole



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376148)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: buff mexican

i thought about breaking it up -- it worse because it puts emphasis on "D was a passenger in C’s car at this time" -- which is a minor detail.

it doesn't really matter whether C or D is the driver.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376159)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:56 AM
Author: Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate

Ah m, okay. For some reason I assumed that D was the main person.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376166)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:03 AM
Author: buff mexican

C and D are both involved. I continue to use the term "C's car" for clarity

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376201)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:51 AM
Author: Pale adventurous messiness

"at this time"

ROFL

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376807)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:54 AM
Author: lavender people who are hurt

Need to clarify at some point whether A or B were actually driving. Or were they in two separate cars, both of which passed C.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376155)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate

Yeah I just worked with the isolated sentence in question b/c I didn’t know what the surrounding sentences are like.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376160)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:04 AM
Author: lavender people who are hurt

You can do it in another sentence, but it's going to be important to be clear who was driving in the passing car.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376205)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:55 AM
Author: bronze electric furnace

While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car that C was driving with a passenger, D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376157)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:57 AM
Author: aromatic burgundy brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376168)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:58 AM
Author: disrespectful incel

As A and B were driving separately in the X area, they passed a car driven by C which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376174)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess

This suggestion isn't meant to be used word for word, just generally to give you the right idea on how to handle this sort of thing, please develop as part of an exercise in your own development as a lawyer. Really need to break this into clauses that explain everything.

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C and containing D as a passenger.

WHEREAS A, B, C, and D are human persons domiciled in Jurisdiction Y

WHEREAS X is a certain area in Jurisdiction Y

WHEREAS A, B, and C are legally authorized to operate motor vehicles ("cars" and each individual such vehicle a "car")

WHEREAS on that certain date, A, B, and C were operating cars.

WHEREAS on that certain date, D was a passenger in the car operated by C.

Now, therefore be it resolved, on that certain date, the aforementioned cars traversed on intersecting paths in Area X.

[I assume by "passed" you mean "passed" as in "they passed by each other while headed in different directions," revise if you mean they were going the same way and A/B's cars passed/overtook C's car.]

Please handle and recirculate, thanks.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376176)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:03 AM
Author: buff mexican



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376203)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:45 AM
Author: carmine self-centered nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376392)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:08 AM
Author: salmon motley library ratface



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376526)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:25 AM
Author: marvelous water buffalo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376657)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 4th, 2022 12:40 PM
Author: beady-eyed alcoholic organic girlfriend

Very clear, no ambiguity, reads like 1st order logic, I like it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44453959)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: snowy national macaca

As A and B entered the X area, they looked at each other, and although none of them said a word, they understood each other perfectly. It was X area after all. Are there any Xs around, they wondered? They passed a beaten-up vehicle with ridiculous oversized chromed wheels with C as a driver and D as a passenger. X's! - thought A and B. C and D did not think anything. They were high.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376178)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:36 AM
Author: hairraiser parlour useless brakes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376332)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: Dashing faggotry



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376340)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: Razzle-dazzle Coral Pervert

FRIENDLESS FAGGOT BIRDSHIT A was driving some FAGgOt BIRdshit car alone(some other NIFmGGA was drivomg alone in another car) they passed ALPHA TURD C , who has MANY DRINKING BUDDIES, SO NATURALLY HAD A PASSENGER (most likely an AZNgirl getting wet for MAMMOTH TURDCOCK)

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376183)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: Exciting Location Fat Ankles



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376187)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376195)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:18 AM
Author: unholy deranged mother hunting ground



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376249)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:47 AM
Author: fear-inspiring indian lodge



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376406)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:36 AM
Author: Curious heaven



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376713)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:37 AM
Author: carmine self-centered nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376724)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 12:32 PM
Author: chestnut blood rage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377057)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 1st, 2021 12:19 AM
Author: Exciting Location Fat Ankles



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42380818)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 9:59 AM
Author: Exciting Location Fat Ankles

As A and B were sucking each other’s cocks in the XXX area, C drove by with D cumming in his ass.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376184)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: aphrodisiac effete rehab prole

i think you nailed it.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376191)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 3:36 PM
Author: brilliant death wish university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378174)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:00 AM
Author: aphrodisiac effete rehab prole

i hope everyone appreciates the mental illness being performed right now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376189)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:28 AM
Author: Rambunctious market



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376669)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: bull headed church digit ratio

A and B passed D and C, who was driving.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376194)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: Stirring area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376341)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 11:52 AM
Author: Pale adventurous messiness

sounds like a riddle

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376816)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:01 AM
Author: heady unhinged locale legend

i hate this crap

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D driving with C.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376197)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:05 AM
Author: buff mexican

i wish this works and it sounds nice but it seems slightly off

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376206)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:06 AM
Author: heady unhinged locale legend

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed by D (who was driving with C).

This is it

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376211)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:07 AM
Author: buff mexican

doesn't it need "D's car"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376216)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:42 AM
Author: heady unhinged locale legend

it says he was driving, which means an automobile.

if you think specifying what kind of automobile is a key detail then can add that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376370)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:05 AM
Author: lavender people who are hurt

Why do you need B, assuming A was driving. Don't say B was driving. Ever. If he wasnt.

As A was driving, they passed ...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376208)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:06 AM
Author: supple milky home candlestick maker

you have to make it more exciting. keep the reader interested.

"Where did this take place? In X. And what happened in X? A and B were together in a car. And what did that car do? Why it passed by another car, a car driven by C. And was C alone in that second car? No, no C was not. C was with D. That's right. A and B passed C and D. It's all true."

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376212)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 30th, 2021 10:08 AM
Author: Saffron base

Were A and B both at the wheel?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376217)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:13 AM
Author: aphrodisiac effete rehab prole

turns out it was a tandem bicycle.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376233)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:20 AM
Author: Stirring area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376607)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:18 AM
Author: unholy deranged mother hunting ground

As some faggot and his friend were driving in the restricted area, they passed a car driven by a nigger and containing some other faggot as a passenger. Regards, I hope this helps.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376246)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:26 AM
Author: Soggy Shrine Internal Respiration

The two cars passed in X. In one, A was driving B. In the other, C was driving D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376290)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:29 AM
Author: bull headed church digit ratio

star crossed lovers. reads like brokeback mountain

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376306)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:31 AM
Author: Soggy Shrine Internal Respiration

still the best way to do it. He has more than a handful of items to hit: location, two cars, who was each driver and who was each passenger, that they passed.

This does it and leaves no uncertainty at all

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376317)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:34 AM
Author: Vibrant Fuchsia Pistol Roommate



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376330)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:35 AM
Author: Dashing faggotry

Okay? Wow. Hey. Picture this: Cars A and B. Right? Going through section X. *makes large "X" using forearms* And boom! Right there, they pass car C. *makes "C" using hand* A car which, at the time, was containing D *unzips pants* as a passenger. *pulls cock out of fly* Any questions?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376331)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:37 AM
Author: hairraiser parlour useless brakes



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376336)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:40 AM
Author: mentally impaired center

A and B, as was their custom from time to time, were engaged in that most fanciful of modern hobbies, navigation of modern paved roads in a device propelled by an internal combustion engine, whence, they happened to pass by and through the X area. It was delightful that time of year and a welcome respite from their usual tiresome surroundings. And, as fate or chance, or even perhaps the Muses had it, another fellow engaged in the very same hobby happened by. Of course, known to them, and combustion engine navigators the State over, twas C along with D. Both were fair fellows and known to A and B. As custom would insist they happened both to notice and acknowledge each other, hobbyists in the same pursuit as they were.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376358)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:09 AM
Author: white mewling hall



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008930)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:44 AM
Author: histrionic wild theater

So, we need to talk about A driving around with B. Here's the thing: they were in X area, and what's problematic is they passed by C—yes, THAT C. C had a passenger at the time, D. Here's why that's not okay.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376389)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:45 AM
Author: vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo

400 km/h, 450 km/h, 500 km/h, 550 km/h; A could feel the force of the acceleration pressing him against the sport bucket seats of his Turbo Allegra Mk. 2, their soft, well-sourced alcantara cosseting his tightly leather chapped legs, the micromechanical motors within instantaneously adjusting to each minor perturbation in the vehicle's three-axis orientation to keep him perfectly balanced, its SWIFT systems scanning kilometers ahead of them in real-time and predictively modulating the various electromagnetic and anti-kinetic shielding systems in order to protect their passage as they rocketed upward toward the gateway to area X--area X, the Sacred Seat of Cybernetic Heaven, its secrets whispering to the hovels of his birthplace below, beckoning brave boys with the Siren Song: "Come, Unlock Our Treasurehosue of Wonder or Die Trying"; "It's a goddamn marvel--" that was B, his copilot jockey, in the seat beside him--he'd always liked the tech stuff, engineered things were his jig and jive and the natural knack he'd expressed for them had been evident since his Fourth Year when he'd spontaneously programmed a molecular excavator during off time while the rest of the class was at the playground; he and B had been practicing for this for over three years, secretive sessions when the sensor rings slipped from alignment every third week on Sunday for maintena--"we have a fucking BOGEY at 3 o'clock HIGH!" B screamed, interrupting his meditation on the past--the systems of the Allegra were fast, but B was faster and he'd spotted the incoming a split second before the computerized indication of the same: "Warning, SWIFT has detected an intrusion in the third--" he cut off the computer; he knew what he needed to know: C was moving to intercept them in his Outrigger, accompanied by D; they'd planned for this eventuality, both the conflict itself and the psychology of facing your own brother and cousin 45 kilometers up in the air, each precise maneuver tiptoeing on the razor thin edge between life and death, a minute miscalculation capable of throwing you off the wrong side into a fiery midair death--there was something poignant about it, the notion that he could die up here in an instant and to his friends and family in the warrens of Bressville below, toiling through their daily tasks with no comprehension of the enormous aerial pageantry above them, his life could blot out with no greater signifier than a vanishing spot of light in the sky; he banished the thought of this and other things as he shouted in the cockpit "let's smoke these fuckers" and pushed down hard on the throttle, the frame of the Allegra bending, straining, complying with the command as they soared to meet the enemy head on, he and B laughing aloud at the thrill of it all.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376393)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:47 AM
Author: histrionic wild theater

Wow

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376411)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:49 AM
Author: vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo

I just copied this from a brief.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376419)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:15 AM
Author: fear-inspiring indian lodge



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376574)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:54 AM
Author: lavender people who are hurt

Your stuff is the only stuff from here I share w my wife. Every time, I explain that "It's just lawyers--we get bored at work--yeah, I know, that's what makes it funny--"

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376824)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:21 PM
Author: peach filthy cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377415)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:00 AM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008886)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:32 AM
Author: French Marketing Idea Hell



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722509)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:51 AM
Author: aromatic burgundy brunch



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376432)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:05 AM
Author: Stirring area

titcr.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376504)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:10 AM
Author: peach filthy cuck

180

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376531)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:18 AM
Author: carmine self-centered nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376589)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:23 AM
Author: brilliant death wish university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376641)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:24 AM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site

holy shit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376648)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: carmine self-centered nursing home

attn low attention span poasters read this whole thing pls

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376708)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:13 PM
Author: bull headed church digit ratio

how

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377366)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:36 AM
Author: chestnut blood rage



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722527)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:35 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376711)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 12:00 PM
Author: Talented Transparent Kitchen



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376866)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 12:01 PM
Author: Disturbing Purple Senate Elastic Band



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376872)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 3:27 PM
Author: brilliant death wish university



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378128)



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Date: June 1st, 2021 9:20 PM
Author: Talented Transparent Kitchen



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42558237)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:00 AM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008882)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:05 AM
Author: Talented Transparent Kitchen

this is incredible

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008910)



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Date: February 25th, 2022 1:39 PM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032706)



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Date: May 4th, 2022 12:31 PM
Author: bearded deer antler therapy



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44453902)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:31 AM
Author: French Marketing Idea Hell

wow

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722507)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:34 AM
Author: peach filthy cuck



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722517)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:44 AM
Author: Metal swashbuckling gay wizard



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722548)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:49 AM
Author: Glittery stag film

High | level | legal work

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376422)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:28 AM
Author: Rambunctious market



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376672)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 10:55 AM
Author: Henna titillating school

Each of A and B were driving in AREA. They both passed a car driven by C with D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376456)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:05 AM
Author: Khaki Really Tough Guy Set

A and B passed a car driven by C, who was transporting D as a passenger, as they drove through the X area.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376505)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:07 AM
Author: Azure famous landscape painting

two people, a & b, drove past c driving with d in his car.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376517)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:13 AM
Author: Racy orchestra pit

C and his passenger D were traveling in X area. A overtook and passed them. B overtook and passed them too.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376555)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:19 AM
Author: Adulterous Tanning Salon

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C, which contained D as a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376600)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:24 AM
Author: laughsome orchid business firm

Haven’t read any of the replies, so someone else may have made the same suggestion, but I’d go with:

While driving in the X area, A & B passed a car containing C (driver) and D (passenger).

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376651)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:27 AM
Author: brilliant death wish university

This was basically gromjoh's poast above except his was more concise.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376665)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:34 AM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376704)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:40 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376736)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 2:08 PM
Author: vigorous kink-friendly laser beams tattoo



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377648)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:01 AM
Author: amber hyperventilating toaster site



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008887)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:33 AM
Author: Mustard halford

writing MFE's, any resources on improving clunky writing? I recently jumped from GOV to tech

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376695)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:33 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess

Did you try the hydro hack?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376699)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:40 AM
Author: sooty razzle skinny woman stead

What’s that

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376738)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:41 AM
Author: opaque new version jewess

You should drink more water, you're probably dehydrated. This will, among other things, improve cognitive function and therefore improve your writing. While you're at it also check your posture I bet you're slouching right now.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376746)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 11:49 AM
Author: carmine self-centered nursing home



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42376800)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:17 PM
Author: Big Walnut Gas Station

Just write in the active voice with short simple sentences, subject verb object. Not hard

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377389)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:16 PM
Author: Big Walnut Gas Station

A and B saw C driving in X

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377381)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:28 PM
Author: translucent coldplay fan

andy and brad were driving around brooklyn when they passed carl and dave in their car.

this doesn't define who is driving and who is riding though.



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377449)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 1:38 PM
Author: Jet internet-worthy range

I am gay

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42377484)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 3:36 PM
Author: brilliant death wish university

great thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378176)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 3:39 PM
Author: Dark Piazza

Shitty writing is putting too much into one sentence.

A and B were driving in the X area. [query: are they both driving separate cars?] C driving D passed them.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42378186)



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Date: April 30th, 2021 8:29 PM
Author: supple milky home candlestick maker

A and C, drivers, were in different cars, driving through area X, and with them were B and D, passengers; B was with A while D was with C; A and B passed by C and D.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42379691)



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Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:50 PM
Author: supple milky home candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42387061)



Reply Favorite

Date: May 23rd, 2021 3:44 PM
Author: supple milky home candlestick maker



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42509184)



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Date: May 2nd, 2021 12:36 PM
Author: opaque new version jewess

Where are we on this? Thank

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#42386977)



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Date: February 22nd, 2022 10:06 AM
Author: white mewling hall

As A and B were driving in the X area, they passed a car driven by C in which D was a passenger.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44008916)



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Date: February 25th, 2022 1:44 PM
Author: Pale adventurous messiness

OP, does this help?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44032743)



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Date: June 22nd, 2022 9:32 AM
Author: Drunken spruce indirect expression cumskin

i don't think anyone reads shitlaw shitpaper so it doesn't matter. aren't state court judges borderline retarded?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#44722512)



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Date: April 19th, 2026 12:23 PM
Author: Pet Relief Area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827186)



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Date: April 19th, 2026 12:42 PM
Author: UN peacekeeper

"and containing D as" -> "in which D was", otherwise fine

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827205)



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Date: April 19th, 2026 1:15 PM
Author: tubby spastic 11yo playing in toddler section

Lots of helpful suggestions in this thread but I’m not sure we’ve got it figured out just yet. Let’s put a pin in it and move on. OP: what’s the next sentence?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827228)



Reply Favorite

Date: April 19th, 2026 2:57 PM
Author: Pet Relief Area



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=4823221&forum_id=2#49827363)