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Anyone know who the Biglaw Biter is?

Vampire or Biglaw summer associate? You be the judge. Thi...
Bateful step-uncle's house
  07/17/25
where is the cleary diver these days
Yapping Mood Native
  07/17/25
Can smoeone not at Above the Law write this story.
arousing autistic stag film boiling water
  07/17/25
wtf, this gave me nostalgia for the good ol' days. I have s...
Plum sinister clown orchestra pit
  07/20/25
just waybackarchive the biglaw reddit thread
Big area
  07/17/25
The New York Post has picked up the story. https://nypost...
gaped sadistic state
  07/19/25
"The bites were not “in an aggressive, ‘we&...
Bateful step-uncle's house
  07/20/25
why dont they link picture? all important ?
chestnut range
  07/20/25
she's probably ugly AF only reason she was canned
Big area
  07/20/25
She got to like 10 bites dude. This is going to be a smokes...
Bateful step-uncle's house
  07/22/25
some rice paddy peasant slobbering all over your armani suit
Big area
  07/22/25
Expect more of this, now that summer classes are Gen Z.
Wonderful dull theatre
  07/20/25
She sounds hot
swashbuckling rehab
  07/20/25
https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/ouch-sidley-intern...
Plum sinister clown orchestra pit
  07/20/25
nothing in the rules ...
rough-skinned outnumbered knife
  07/20/25
Picked up by the XO Daily Mail. https://www.dailymail.co.uk...
vibrant lettuce garrison
  07/21/25
...
Gay hideous market giraffe
  07/22/25
...
Gay hideous market giraffe
  07/22/25
LAW BITES LAW BLEEDS IT'S BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES
idiotic lodge faggotry
  07/22/25
i love vampyres
Stubborn razzmatazz theater stage
  07/22/25


Poast new message in this thread



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Date: July 17th, 2025 9:27 PM
Author: Bateful step-uncle's house

Vampire or Biglaw summer associate? You be the judge.

This is a story you’re really going to chew on for a while. A Sidley summer associate in the New York office who we’ll refer to as Biglaw Biter (for reasons that will soon be apparent) was let go after a series of incidents with other employees. What happened you ask? She bit other people at work. You are not reading this incorrectly: a Biglaw summer associate bit people at the firm — with her teeth.

(For the record, before settling on the alliterative Biglaw Biter as the summer’s code name, we did consider Sidley Masticator, Scrumptious Summer, Champion Chomper, Mike Tyson of Biglaw, and the close runner-up, Associate Lecter.)

According to insiders at the firm, pretty much from the start of the summer, the Biglaw Biter started chomping away at other employees at Sidley Gnaw-stin — not in an aggressive, “we’re beefing” way, but more of a faux-quirky manic pixie dream girl crossed with the Donner party vibe. But like, you’re in NYC for the summer — if you want to get your kicks by biting people, there are more consensual ways to do it.

The final chomp-count is thought to be in the double digits — which is an awfully long time for the nibbling to continue. (Though I’ve seen pics of the results post-Biglaw Biter, and “nibble” is probably too tame a word. No one should have marks on their person after an interaction with a co-worker in Biglaw — emotional and psychological scars only!) It’s unclear why so many people let this go before reporting the Biglaw Biter, but the rumor is she’s otherwise personable and there was some reluctance to elevate the matter.

It’s just wild that this happened in Biglaw. A single bite is enough to get a toddler written up in an incident report from daycare. And if the biting goes on 10+ times? That’ll get you kicked out of daycare.

And Biglaw too, as it happens.

Not since the aughts have I heard a tale of such out-of-pocket summer associate behavior. There were strip club visits (Opens in a new window)and expense accounts gone wild (Opens in a new window), but obviously, the classic of the genre is Aquagirl (Opens in a new window). Above the Law has long referred to her exploits as the bar for summer associate behavior (though the Biglaw Biter just might take the crown). For those that were in their preschool biting phase back in 2006, Aquagirl (Opens in a new window)was a Cleary summer associate who drunkenly stripped down to her underwear at an event at Chelsea Piers and jumped into the Hudson River. Ultimately she had to be rescued in a boat — but still ended the summer with an offer.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110557)



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Date: July 17th, 2025 9:32 PM
Author: Yapping Mood Native

where is the cleary diver these days

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110566)



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Date: July 17th, 2025 9:39 PM
Author: arousing autistic stag film boiling water

Can smoeone not at Above the Law write this story.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110577)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:06 PM
Author: Plum sinister clown orchestra pit

wtf, this gave me nostalgia for the good ol' days. I have so many stories of summer associate drama that basically went extinct as the programs shrank and the only people that got one of these were the most risk-averse of the risk-averse.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116817)



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Date: July 17th, 2025 9:53 PM
Author: Big area

just waybackarchive the biglaw reddit thread

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49110626)



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Date: July 19th, 2025 10:55 AM
Author: gaped sadistic state

The New York Post has picked up the story.

https://nypost.com/2025/07/19/us-news/cannibalistic-intern-fired-from-nyc-law-firm-for-biting-up-to-ten-coworkers-report/

The firm declined to comment. But an insider told The Post the intern bit only five employees and that exaggerations were now flooding the internet.

“People are outright making things up at this point,” echoed a Reddit user who claimed to work with the masticator at Sidley.

“I just want to ask people to please remember that there’s a human being on the other end of this story — someone whose mental health is a genuine concern, and who is probably feeling like her life is ruined right now,” the July 11 post continued. “She made a really stupid mistake and has paid the price for it.”

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49114152)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 3:31 PM
Author: Bateful step-uncle's house

"The bites were not “in an aggressive, ‘we’re beefing’ way” – but rather, “a faux-quirky manic pixie dream girl crossed with the Donner party vibe,” the outlet reported.

“It’s unclear why so many people let this go before reporting the Biglaw Biter, but the rumor is she’s otherwise personable and there was some reluctance to elevate the matter,” the outlet reported, citing unnamed sources.

-----

Honestly, she sounds cute af. I'm thinking like a 30 years' younger Amy C. Barrett.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116771)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 3:48 PM
Author: chestnut range

why dont they link picture? all important ?

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116793)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:09 PM
Author: Big area

she's probably ugly AF

only reason she was canned

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116823)



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Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:36 PM
Author: Bateful step-uncle's house

She got to like 10 bites dude. This is going to be a smokeshow.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121712)



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Date: July 22nd, 2025 1:05 PM
Author: Big area

some rice paddy peasant slobbering all over your armani suit

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121813)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:00 PM
Author: Wonderful dull theatre

Expect more of this, now that summer classes are Gen Z.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116806)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:10 PM
Author: swashbuckling rehab

She sounds hot

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116824)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:10 PM
Author: Plum sinister clown orchestra pit

https://www.rollonfriday.com/news-content/ouch-sidley-intern-expelled-biting

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116825)



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Date: July 20th, 2025 4:15 PM
Author: rough-skinned outnumbered knife

nothing in the rules ...

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49116834)



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Date: July 21st, 2025 3:53 PM
Author: vibrant lettuce garrison

Picked up by the XO Daily Mail.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14922813/summer-associate-fired-law-firm-biting-colleagues-newyork.html

CSLG - Try to get on Matt Gaetz's show to discuss this one.

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49119410)



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Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:36 AM
Author: Gay hideous market giraffe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49120533)



Reply Favorite

Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:03 PM
Author: Gay hideous market giraffe



(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121599)



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Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:37 PM
Author: idiotic lodge faggotry

LAW BITES

LAW BLEEDS

IT'S BRINGING ME TO MY KNEES

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121716)



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Date: July 22nd, 2025 12:49 PM
Author: Stubborn razzmatazz theater stage

i love vampyres

(http://www.autoadmit.com/thread.php?thread_id=5751619&forum_id=2#49121759)